Does your Church send letters asking for money?

[goofygirl]

That counts for a lot. It takes a lot of people to get everything done. We have our priest, a secretary that works pretty limited hours and someone to do the cleaning. Everything else gets done by church members. (I'm also Episcopalian.)

We have the same thing: priest, part time secretary and a sexton. About 50-60 people attend regularly.

 

[lovesmurfs]

Tithing isn't about paying for things God can't pay for, its about showing God (in a way that is honestly a little painful... who doesn't want to hold onto their money), that He is first and that we recognize that everything we have comes from Him and thank Him for that by giving back to him. It helps us keep our priorities straight, and allows him to show us the ways he can bless us when we do.

ITA. Tithing is an act of faith, pure and simple, and we're promised to be blessed by the act of tithing, of giving the first 10% of our income to the Lord. I've seen it work over and over again.

"'Bring the whole tithe into the storehouse, that there may be food in my house. Test me in this,' says the LORD Almighty, 'and see if I will not throw open the floodgates of heaven and pour out so much blessing that you will not have room enough for it.'" Malachi 3:10

 

[CEDmom]

Would you do that even if you felt (as I did) that God was calling you to give elsewhere (a church that is transforming hundreds of lives in an area of Africa that desparately needs it that has NO money coming in from its poverty stricken and mostly starving and sick congregation and so far has no overseas support besides a few independent givers who felt called to it such as myself). If you chose to still give to your church, when you thought God was telling you otherwise, would you still be giving to God or would you then just be giving to the Church (buildings, programs, etc), or do you not see a difference?

I honestly do not mean this in a bad way. I am curious as to the POV (for background I recently returned to school as a Bible Theology student at a Christian college and really like learning about all the different philosophies about this stuff as most of the students believe different things and tithe is one of those areas of "controversy"... and i do fully expect some of my own beliefs to change as I delve deeper and learn more... so I do not mean to imply I have it all figured out). I am aware of the different teachings regarding the tithe. The church I grew up in taught you bring it all to the storehouse and the storehouse is your church and only your church. My current church teaches that you bring in the full tithe to the storehouse also, but that the storehouse is anywhere God's work is being done and that you should prayerfully consider where God would have you give, because he may have it for you to give outside of your church... so I am not going against their teachings (or more importantly the Bibles, to my knowledge and understanding) in tithing elsewhere. I don't think one is necessarily wrong (and I can't wait to get to these sections of the Bible in my course work at school to learn more about the Biblical context for the different ideas), but I know my personal experience was that I felt very strongly called to give outside of my church, and when I worried that my church would suffer from that, God met that concern by raising the funds for my church elsewhere as He told me He would. So I do feel I made the choice right for me (and I do still give my time and talent at my local church as well as in Kenya).

Give your $ where you want. However, remember that your own physical church won't continue to stand without $ from it's members. I know a church is not a building but rather the people who belong to it but if they want to continue to worship in that physical space they need to do things to bring $ into it.

I have to honestly say you're on a completely different plain than me. I enjoy Church and it is part of who I am but I don't spend significant time on a daily basis thinking about my faith.

 

[Fitswimmer]

Our priest just made a request in the last two weeks about some needed repairs to the Church and the Rectory. Our regular collection covers the bills, but just like in our own homes repairs come up and extra cash is needed. We have two collections at Mass, the first covers the regular operating bills and the second will cover those extra repairs.
I have no issue with it, everyone got hit with the high fuel costs this summer and anyone that owns a home knows about broken hot water heaters, roof repairs, leaky gutters and all those lovely little surprises.
He just asked if everyone could consider those needs when they decide to donate, no pressure.
It makes me sad when I read some of these posts. I've been a part of 3 different parishes in my life and I have never heard a sermon trying to guilt me into giving more. One of the parishes was a tithing parish and once a year they did a presentation about it, but it was very low key and presented as an option not a demand. The kind of pressure some of you are experiencing really is not what Church should be about.

 

[We_Love_Disney]

Our parish did this a few years ago. They had the audacity to tell me the value of my home, what my mortgage payment was, and based on that, they suggested how much I should be giving to them!! Talk about an invasion of privacy! Prior to that, I had been generous given my circumstances, after that, they got a very minimal amount. I know that the catholic church has more money than can be spent in a lifetime, let them go to Rome for the cash!

To make matters worse, when I needed their help, they turned their backs on me! Sorry all our money is earmarked for others, we don't give to individuals, and go on welfare. Needless to say we aren't active in our parish any more.

 

[JudicialTyranny]

I should add they also sent letters asking for money for unexpected or unusually large expenses like when the school roof caved in after a heavy snow, they asked for extra contributions to fix the roof, the school also needed a new fire alarm system so we got a special letter about that. When the church needed a new roof we got a letter about that--those kinds of things. Truthfully, in our old parish, that was really the best way to get money from parishioners, strange parish that way. If you told them you needed $100,000 for a new roof, the money was there, if you told them the weekly contributions to meet daily operating expenses for the church were $25,000 behind, you wouldn't see the money.

This is not at all unusual. One of our former pastors said the same thing in one of his annual "state of the parish" reports. He said that he knew that if he asked for money to repair the air conditioner or some other specific repair, he'd get it easily, but ask for an increase in weekly contributions and it wouldn't amount to much. For example, one Sunday he remarked that the children needed new booklets and someone wrote him a check for the full amount needed and gave it to him on the way out of church.

We usually get two letters each year - one for the "fall collection" and another around Christmas. The fall collection letter usually suggests a donation of $100. I think the Christmas one asks for the same.

We have weekly family envelopes to use, but I can only recall once or twice when an amount was suggested (1% of annual salary over the course of the year - not unreasonable). Every few years, we are sometimes asked to try to increase our weekly donation by $5.

I still am astounded at the number of people who give $1. These are usually visitors, not regulars, but still - that's what my kids give. When I attend a different church, I'll give at least $5 or $10.

 

[Pop Daddy]

they dont

 

[JR6ooo4]

10% was requested in the letter we got.

Mikeeee

 

[disneymom3]

Our parish did this a few years ago. They had the audacity to tell me the value of my home, what my mortgage payment was, and based on that, they suggested how much I should be giving to them!! Talk about an invasion of privacy! Prior to that, I had been generous given my circumstances, after that, they got a very minimal amount. I know that the catholic church has more money than can be spent in a lifetime, let them go to Rome for the cash!

To make matters worse, when I needed their help, they turned their backs on me! Sorry all our money is earmarked for others, we don't give to individuals, and go on welfare. Needless to say we aren't active in our parish any more.

Wow. That is really sad. We went to a church a several years back and on the Sunday of the stewardship drive the priest basically said that if you had $30 to either buy groceries or give to the church, you should give it to the church and trust that God would provide. I wasn't sure why we couldn't just trust that God would provide for the church instead of for my groceries! When we left DH who is very mild and nonreactionary, said, "We are never stepping foot in that church again." And we didn't. It has been at least 5 years, we told them we were leaving their church and we STILL get envelopes from there.

At our current church, our pastor has been on a bit of a giving kick. But there are no letters home etc. And definitely no one telling us how much our house is worth and therefore how much we should be giving.

 

[LiLIrishChick63]

my DF used to go to church ages ago with his ex at the time and when they broke up, he stopped going and all of a sudden they started sending him envelopes to send money back in. he's not very fond of churches anymore.

 

[LiLIrishChick63]

Wow. That is really sad. We went to a church a several years back and on the Sunday of the stewardship drive the priest basically said that if you had $30 to either buy groceries or give to the church, you should give it to the church and trust that God would provide. I wasn't sure why we couldn't just trust that God would provide for the church instead of for my groceries! When we left DH who is very mild and nonreactionary, said, "We are never stepping foot in that church again." And we didn't. It has been at least 5 years, we told them we were leaving their church and we STILL get envelopes from there.

At our current church, our pastor has been on a bit of a giving kick. But there are no letters home etc. And definitely no one telling us how much our house is worth and therefore how much we should be giving.

i don't go to church anymore(my home is enough church for me, i can pray there) but when i did it was ages ago with my parents and ALL i EVER heard was "you must tithe! you must tithe! the Lord says to tithe!" every single week. i would always sit back and think "what does God need with all this money?" and i got my answer when we went to a church picnic at my pastors house that was in Lewiston Heights......by the name you could probably imagine that it was a mansion.

so i don't really go anymore. but my parents go to another church and they say that the pastor never really talks about money, which is nice. i think that people want to give when they don't hear about it so much.

 

[CEDmom]

Our parish did this a few years ago. They had the audacity to tell me the value of my home, what my mortgage payment was, and based on that, they suggested how much I should be giving to them!! Talk about an invasion of privacy! Prior to that, I had been generous given my circumstances, after that, they got a very minimal amount. I know that the catholic church has more money than can be spent in a lifetime, let them go to Rome for the cash!

To make matters worse, when I needed their help, they turned their backs on me! Sorry all our money is earmarked for others, we don't give to individuals, and go on welfare. Needless to say we aren't active in our parish any more.

I know those things are a matter of public record but what they did would have really made me question their integrity.

The Episcopal Church welcomes you .

 

[Tink&SquirtsMom]

remember that your own physical church won't continue to stand without $ from it's members

I guess thats where we'll agree to disagree. I just can't see as how the God who created you and me and the whole universe needs my tiny 10% to keep a church honoring him going. There are numerous stories of churches in dire financial need being blessed beyond belief, that support my conclusion. And yes sometimes churches fail, but sometimes thats supposed to happen too. Sometimes they were internally unhealthy (church staff not walking the walk), sometimes they needed spiritual pruning (my moms church is going through a financially tough time, they lost some staff who went on to bigger paychecks when their church couldn't keep up with others but the new staff has revitalized the old church and now tithing and attendance is picking back up), sometimes nothing is wrong with it but God has something better in store (just saw a friend today back in town visiting, her husbands church plant failed here over a year ago but now he is at a large church making a huge difference and loving his job more then he thought possible). And I have to say from what I have seen in Kenya that maybe if we focused less on the physical buildings, exciting programs, etc, (they have NONE of that) we could focus more on life transformation and living the life God intended. I'm just saying when you are sitting under an acaia tree (no church building) and watch a group of women sing praise to God with tears in their eyes and know that to them having God in their families life has meant that there husbands respect and honor them, that their daughter won't be forced to get a female circumscion, or be a part of polygamous marriage, you know that you don't need the building, the water heater or a brand new roof to learn about the love and peace that comes from knowing God. Its is evident just from the lifes you see changing of those who love God and see his love in return. So many of our churches have the building plus (fancy seats, sound system, rockin band) what they don't have is the transformed lives. And thats why the need to push for tithing. Believe me if people in America saw their husbands putting down the pornography (a huge issue for men in American churches), treat their spouses with respect and consideration, model the love of Christ to those in their community... churches couldn't hold all the people who would come to Christ and people couldn't open their checkbooks quick enough. But when people are going to get a little song, a little prayer, opening their checkbook to help the cause, and walk out feeling good but changing nothing in their lives... well you are gonna get what we have in America now (not pointing to you but this is a major problem in America).

I have to honestly say you're on a completely different plain than me. I enjoy Church and it is part of who I am but I don't spend significant time on a daily basis thinking about my faith.

Not quite sure what you mean by this. I believe being a Christian is about having a personal relationship with God, and that that relationship should be the first one in my life (God, then spouse, then kids....). Like my marriage and relationship with my kids, that relationship is as healthy as the time I devote to maintaining it. Not that everyone needs to go to school to major in Bible and Theology but I can't imagine my marriage or relationship with my kids would be very healthy if I focused on it only Sundays for 1 hour (not saying thats what you do, again just not sure what you meant).

 

[goofygirl]

i got my answer when we went to a church picnic at my pastors house that was in Lewiston Heights......by the name you could probably imagine that it was a mansion.

That's why I like churches that have a rectory right there on site where you can see how your priest is living! My priest lives in a humble little rectory right next to the church.

 

[VioltePrincess]

bold emphasis mine



Not to call these posters out but if I heard these comments in my church I'd be tempted not to give there (and I work with finances for my church too). The God who created the world (without you sending in your piddly check) absolutely does NOT need our money to keep our churches going. God can raise up the poorest church and bankrupt the largest most giving church in seconds if He saw fit. The church does not depend on its members, it should depend on God. God does pay our heating bill by convicting people to give, or creating miracles because it all comes from God and belongs to God, no matter whose hands deliver it. I saw this with my own eyes, when my tiny church at my last home needed a bulding (rent was crazy expensive), but a chuch buying a property in Silicon Valley during the internet boom was UNHEARD of. The asking price for the property we got was over 5 million. We got them to GIVE it to us. We got a company to GIVE for no money a 5 million dollar property to a church in Silicon Valley during the dotcom boom when properties were selling at least 20% OVER asking. They even paid closing costs. Can you imagine having the balls to even call in and present that offer (um we'll pay you nothing and you'll take it) but they felt God was telling them to ask for that property. If that isn't God providing for His church I don't know what is.

Tithing isn't about paying for things God can't pay for, its about showing God (in a way that is honestly a little painful... who doesn't want to hold onto their money), that He is first and that we recognize that everything we have comes from Him and thank Him for that by giving back to him. It helps us keep our priorities straight, and allows him to show us the ways he can bless us when we do.

I really struggled with this recently at my church. Another start up small church without a building (we have a small office building and meet at an elementary school). I felt I was being called to give my money to a cause in Kenya, that God has really placed on my heart (was there in July and will be back next month). However (because I work with the incoming finances) I knew we were one of the largest regular givers at our church and that our church would really hurt without the money. I prayed about it and felt God ask me why I was being unfaithful, why I was holding onto the concept that it was my money that was doing these things and not Him. I began sending my tithing to the cause in Africa, stopping at my church and when i did tithing at my home church immediately rose up and covered what we had been giving (and no one knew we had decided to do this). God took care of my church still and used the experience to remind me that these things come from Him, not me.

BTW, back on topic, none of the churches I have chose to attend as an adult (non-denominational, fully Bible based) have ever sent out letters, besides the one the government requires to prove how much tithing you gave for tax deduction purposes.

I'm Jewish, so maybe I don't understand, but...


there's a Jewish sotry about a young man who wants to marry. only problem is, the young man is a full time scholar, with no job or visible means of support.

the bride to be's father asks the young man "and when you marry, do you intend to continue your studies?'

"of course."

"and how will you support my daughter?'

"G-d will provide."


so the fathe rtells the bride's mother "he's a nice enough young man. he thinks I'm G-d."


G-d doesn't pay the mortgage for the synagogue, or the Rabbi's salary, or for the books for the Hebrew school. G-d didn't make the caterer go bankrupt -- he did that himself -- or cause the nursery school enrollment to increase. G-d has to work through the efforts of humanity.


and trust me, you have no idea about solicitations until you've joined a synagogue...

 

[Zippa D Doodah]

This thread seems to boil down to a very basic truth: None of us like to give money toward a budget -and that is how most churches raise funds. Most churches show members the budget and then ask members to give towward that budget. Who here gets excited about paying for fuel oil and office supplies for the local church building?

What churches SHOULD be doing (and bless those that do) is raising funds by sharing a vision for how things could/should be. Think about it... charitable organizations such as United Way, Red Cross, etc convince us to give by showing us what they do or dream to do. Do we know or care what the CEO of the Red Cross makes... or how much United Way spends on mileage reimbursement for its employees? Yet 95% of churches raise funds by publishing a line item budget (which most people don't even know how to read) and asking people to give toward that. Reading this thread proves this to me. Those of you who give to church DESERVE to give toward a vision and not a budget.

 

[snowwhite17]

Yes, and it is a total turn off!!!

 

[Pigeon]

They had the audacity to tell me the value of my home, what my mortgage payment was, and based on that, they suggested how much I should be giving to them!! Talk about an invasion of privacy!

Unbelievable. I would have sent in my resignation letter by return mail.

Vision is nice, but if I didn't get the budget, I wouldn't give them a dime. I have a friend who belongs to a church that makes tithing mandatory if you want to do things like see your own children get married, but yet the church never provides the members a budget. Maybe strong-arming is better than vision.

 

[Tink&SquirtsMom]

G-d doesn't pay the mortgage for the synagogue, or the Rabbi's salary, or for the books for the Hebrew school. G-d didn't make the caterer go bankrupt -- he did that himself -- or cause the nursery school enrollment to increase. G-d has to work through the efforts of humanity.

To say God HAS to work through the efforts of humanity, seems to be limiting God in a pretty big way. I think God does provide for those things by convicting people and working on their hearts to provide for those things... you might say the humans who follow through are the ones doing it, but I don't think they do it alone. I do think it is largely God. And God simply does not NEED little old me to provide for His people or His work in the world. However he has put it on my heart that I need Him, and that relationship will manifest itself in giving back to Him. Some people are convicted to give to their local church, I am convicted to give elsewhere. However should I or anyone else turn away from their conviction will the church fail because it needed us? Nope, should God want He can convict 20 people to come in and fill my place. God can raise up whatever he wants. That not to say people shouldn't give because someone else will do it for them. People should give, but not because God needs it, they should do it to say thanks for all he has given them, because it is Biblical, because God has put it on their heart, and because it allows God to bless us in many new ways.


And on a totally different note... regarding my last post I wanted to say, more than a little bit ironically, that I totally hate Christians "in-fighting" with each other over what amounts to basically logistics of implementing our faith, when we should be united as the body of Christ. So I truly hope I didn't offend anybody. Again I certainly don't have it all figured out, and I don't think anybody does. I think if we give to God and we try our best to do it in a way that we think is pleasing to Him and Biblically sound that is fantastic.

 

[minniecarousel]

noooo....there is no suggestion of an amount! We are mailed weekly envelopes every month. Special letters go out when there is an unexpected expense. Right now we're re-roofing the Church and hall, so pledge letters went out. We did the same thing when they built the gym. Since our kids were playing basketball, we were very interested in donating to that. I feel that the roof is the congregation's responsiblity, so we sent in an additional check for that.

ugh! I would hate to tithe!