Does anyone just get into a rut?

[toledo13]

Hi guys. Do you all just get into a rut? A job rut, a routine rut.... any type of rut? I've been trying to mix some things up in my life, but I just feel that I'm in this constant stage of rut. How do you get out of your ruts?

 

[C.Ann]

Funny you should mention that, because the past few months I have been feeling the same way.. Like I need to mix things up - do something different - but I don't have a clue where to start..

I don't work (and can't), so changing jobs isn't a possibility.. I have hobbies, but they aren't "enough" anymore - if that makes sense..

I'll be anxious to see what others suggest..

 

[kellyg403]

I'll be anxious to see what others suggest..

Me too! I have been in a rut for a few years it seems like. Somedays I just don't know what/who I want to be when I grow up....or the kids grow up which is happening by the minute!

I have tried walking...I lost 14 lbs in 7 months. I have tried painting and redoing and cleaning the house...looks great. I have tried going to Barnes and Noble 2x's a week and just drinking a coffee and reading a book to get out of the house. I have lunch with friends at least 2x's a week. Just can't find that one thing that interests me at the moment. I was thinking it was menopause or something.

Can't wait to hear the answers!
Kelly

 

[TLSnell1981]

I think must of us get "stuck in a rut" during different stages of our lives. As we grow..... we question what we are doing.....why we are doing it......can we do it better. I think this is pretty normal for most people.

Do something you've never done before.....make a bucket list. Set time aside to do something just for yourself......on a regular basis. I also like to journal.....it relieves stress. I don't think there are any quick fixes.

 

[C.Ann]

Me too! I have been in a rut for a few years it seems like. Somedays I just don't know what/who I want to be when I grow up....or the kids grow up which is happening by the minute!

I have tried walking...I lost 14 lbs in 7 months. I have tried painting and redoing and cleaning the house...looks great. I have tried going to Barnes and Noble 2x's a week and just drinking a coffee and reading a book to get out of the house. I have lunch with friends at least 2x's a week. Just can't find that one thing that interests me at the moment. I was thinking it was menopause or something.

Can't wait to hear the answers!
Kelly

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Well, I'll be 59 in a few weeks and I just feel like I'm "going nowhere" - kind of spinning my wheels..

I can't do any activities at night because I can't see to drive (and I'm not ready to go hang out at the Senior Citizens Center during the day )..

I did some volunteering last year, but now due to health issues, I can't commit to specific days..

Traveling is pretty much out - because the economy is making me too nervous and I will likely need that money for continuing health care..

There are days that I just feel like tearing my hair out!!

There has to be something - but what?

 

[SpecialK]

For me, it was more an attitude change than a big change in my activities. I realized I was spending a lot of time thinking about being dissatisfied with where my life was at. Had a little talk with myself, and started concentrating on what I do have. That shift seemed to make me calmer and I started to be happier doing pretty much the same things I was always doing. don't feel so restless anymore.

 

[TLSnell1981]

For me, it was more an attitude change than a big change in my activities. I realized I was spending a lot of time thinking about being dissatisfied with where my life was at.

I think you summed it up.

We can set goals for ourselves that aren't life changing by themselves. Accomplishing small things can be very satisfying.

I have fibromyalgia and CFS. I have to focus on what I can do....rather than what I can't. I definitely appreciate the little things in life more than ever.

 

[C.Ann]

I think you summed it up.

We can set goals for ourselves that aren't life changing by themselves. Accomplishing small things can be very satisfying.

I have fibromyalgia and CFS. I have to focus on what I can do....rather than what I can't. I definitely appreciate the little things in life more than ever.

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That's part of the problem though.. I have never, ever had a problem finding things to keep me occupied and interested.. Being alone and entertaining myself has never been an issue..

I think I'm just tired of the "same old, same old" and looking for something (anything) that will really grab my interest..

 

[Pin Wizard]

The rut is unending. Only get a break from it for "vacation" which is usually spent at home. Yes, some days I want to run down the hall screaming and pulling my hair out. That's when I know I need a break from work. I'm looking forward to November when I plan to take a week! Same routine every day. I'm really tired of getting up at 5 a.m. at the latest!!!

 

[TLSnell1981]

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That's part of the problem though.. I have never, ever had a problem finding things to keep me occupied and interested.. Being alone and entertaining myself has never been an issue..

I think I'm just tired of the "same old, same old" and looking for something (anything) that will really grab my interest..

Do something totally out of character. ...just don't get arrested!

 

[kellyg403]

Do something totally out of character. ...just don't get arrested!

This reminds of a funny story. A couple weeks ago I applied for a job with the police dept as a school crossing guard. I figure that is 4 hours a day and something new. I had to go to the BACK of the police station through the locked doors and everything. I swear I was sweating and my heart was beating fast. They asked all kinds of questions, like are you/have you ever been convicted of a felony. I was like "uh..no, uh I don't think so, uh no". I felt so dumb. I came home and called my dd24 and told her the story. Her response..."Mom you have an unhealthy fear of the police, you need to do something illegal to get over it". Hard for me to do since I have literally lived my life AVOIDING the police.

I think something totally out of character for me would be running away from home. Yeah..that might fix it for me!

Kelly

 

[Cantw8]

I'm in a huge rut right now. I have several job possibilities outside my state, I am seriously considering interviewing for them. Something we all need to remember...this is not dress rehearsal, this is the only life you get here on this earth....take chances

 

[Califgirl]

There are some great suggestions on this thread! A new hobby, or volunteering for an organization that you're passionate about are both good.

I know that every 5 years, I had better do something to 'change up' my life a little. I love my husband, so I didn't want to change that, I generally change horses every 5 years or so ( learning to ride was a change I made after I graduated from college - that kept life interesting!) I've volunteered for a local wildlife project. But the surefire thing that always does it for me is taking a class. I need to learn something new to keep life interesting. I've taken classes in guitar, machine tooling, aeronautics, cooking and foreign languages. I usually need a 'kick start' every 5 years or so, but sometimes a little more often. Learning something new, and getting interested and passionate about something outside my normal life keeps me interested in life, and helps me to look at things in a new way.

(Of course, I love to travel and I always look forward to see what everyone is up to on the DIS, but don't those go without saying on this board??)


There are so many options out there, it's easy to get overwhelmed by the possibilities. Just jump in to something new once in a while!

Let me also say .. some of us feel 'in a rut' when we're really just tired and worn out. Take a little time for yourself, eat well, have your nails done, get a massage, take up a sport, stretch or go dancing. Stay healthy and life will seem much more inviting and sooo much easier.

 

[PrincessKitty1]

Yes, I get into a rut! I change jobs at least every 3 years. I am vested in two different places (the state retirement system and the hospital where I work) so as long as I work one place or another, it's cool. I'm an RN so it's not too tough to change jobs now and then.

Re: the rest of my life, I currently have a fantasy of buying a second home in a beach community near here for weekends/retirement. I spend a lot of time lkooking on the internet and even have "my" house picked out (it's for sale for a great price in a great location!). Too bad I don't have money for a second house.

I have a good friend my age who is also the restless type. We both agree that as we get older, we feel like we're running out of time to try new things. We both like to explore different crafts (she is currently doing tile mosaic and I'm learning how to make beads through lampworking). We both have a fantasy of selling antiques. I do buy and sell antique books.

I'm always bugging DH to do different things with me. I'm lucky our local community college has an amazing community education program, with everything from fencing to Tai Chi to mystery writing to lampworking to sailing.

C. Ann, have you thought about doing something from your home like selling on Ebay or Amazon, or being a foster parent for (for instance) cats?