Do you make kids say "Trick or Treat"

[ClaraOswald]

Dang, I'm thankful I don't live in some of your neighborhoods. My 12 year old is minimally verbal. It doesn't matter how many times we tell him to say trick-or-treat or thank you...it's still a massive struggle. And the few times he would say it, it was too quiet for the homeowners to hear anyway.

Actually, maybe a few of you DO live in my neighborhood because I did get a few dirty looks on Friday night. And at least 1 eye roll that I noticed.

It's just a bummer because he's finally able to do the action of trick-or-treating with no prompting...he can walk up to a door and ring a doorbell. So it would be nice to give him some independence. But since there are some old biddies in our neighborhood, I feel like I have to shadow him and harp on him at every....single...door. I'm sure it makes it slightly less enjoyable for him to have me giving him the same verbal prompt all night.

I don't believe in making kids jump through hoops like that. In my experience most children do say trick or treat and thank you without prompting, if they are able. And I pass out candy because I want to see children having fun, not to enforce some kind of etiquette lesson.

Those of you who are saying you won't give them candy unless they say trick or treat? Do you actually send them away from your doorstep empty handed? Do you ever think that some of those children might be disabled in ways you can't see?

I have a nonverbal teenager daughter. She still likes to trick or treat with her cousins. We shouldn't have to walk up to doorsteps with her for the sole purpose of explaining to demanding adults that she can't speak. But we do. Or her cousins have to. And it makes her feel terrible.

Maybe a child is deaf. Or painfully shy and anxious around strangers. There are so many reasons why a person might not say "trick or treat". And that's not my business. If someone comes to my house they can have a treat. That's why I pass out candy in the first place.

THIS. All of this.

I just wish people would be more understanding about these sorts of things. And it's a freaking holiday so how about just let us enjoy it, you know? As if everyday life isn't hard enough for my child...especially with the lack of understanding in our society. Can they just let him have a nice Halloween without getting weird looks?? I really don't think I'm asking too much.

I should have make notes about which houses to avoid next year but, like I said, I don't really want to make the holiday less fun by taking notes. Ha!

I also plan to let my son trick or treat for as long as he likes. I don't care if he's 30 years old...I will take him. I can't wait to see the look we'll get then!

The kicker is....my son doesn't even like candy much. He'll eat the Kitkats but doesn't really care about the candy. He just enjoys the activity. It's his favorite holiday.