Disney's Cost-Cutting Measures -- Funny

[montessori]

We all know Disney has been cutting back on hours and shows etc.
What other steps is the company taking to improve it's bottom line?
(stolen from "THE ONION")

Pluto only gets dry dog food.

Robots in Hall of Presidents reprogrammed to roam
through the park mugging visitors between shows.

Suing self for copyright violation.

Holographic ghosts in Haunted Mansion replaced with
janitor wearing vampire teeth.

CEO Michael Eisner's annual salary reduced from
$60 skajillion to $54 skajillion.

Theme parks instituting a two-sweatshirt minimum.

Re-edited "PETER PAN", in which Peter urges children
to mail in money to save Tinkerbell's life.

Wide-eyed childlike wonderment of Magic Kingdom
reduced by 15 percent.

Exploring possible new revenue stream by permitting
manufacture of select merchandise items based on
certain Disney films.

Stealing the sorcerer's magic hat, creating more and
more money until it spins out of control in a destructive
whirlpool, providing a valuable lesson about greed.

 

[phyllis1966]

Very funny!!!

 

[HauntedMansionFan]

The Onion is always good for a laugh.

 

[laceemouse]

My favorite is the Peter Pan one. I can hear Robin Williams saying it!!

 

[JenniferW]

Hilarious!

Jenn