Disney World and yelling at kids??!!!

[pnelson]

Does anyone watch The View? Well, a couple of weeks ago, Star Jones must have gone to Disney World because she was talking about it and what she saw. She said one of the things that really upset her was the number of parents she saw screaming at children. Her and Joy equated some of it to child abuse and said it was one of the worst things she had ever seen. Did anyone see that episode?

Anways, I've been thinking of that for the last few weeks and really feeling a little sad because I can think of times when I did lose it with my son when he was young at Disney World. It just makes me feel sad, but I wonder how common it really is. I can't be the only one who has lost it with her child at Disney World. While there were many wonderful moments, there were times when I admit I did say to him "I'll never bring you here again!"

And I guess, now that he is getting older, I wish I could have some of those times when he was smaller back. And I feel bad at the moments I wasted by being mad.

Anways, has anyone else ever "lost" it with their child at Disney World?

 

[RUDisney]

Of course, we're all human. While we tried not to really lose it, our patience was tried sometimes. I remember going up to the champagne tent in France at the food and wine festival and ordering a glass of bubbly. When my DS asked me what I was doing, I told him I was buying insurance to calm my nerves.

Remember, Starr was there probably only with adult friends. She doesn't have children of her own, so no firsthand experience of being talked at or whined to incessantly.

Just remember, one day, her day may come too, when she eats the words that she spoke.

 

[caitycaity]

child abuse? give me a break!

parents are human too.

 

[FOJMO]

I just posted my comments on this yesterday on the thread about seeing anything humorous that people do at WDW.

Well, needless to say, it's NOT humorous, but I posted a response about how we've observed MANY times, parents yelling and screaming at their kids. We've overheard over and over again, "Now SMILE. You'd better smile when I'm taking this picture. We didn't spend all this money to come here to have you crying on every picture"!

Since we moved to FL and we are fortunate enough to visit WDW frequently, we take it at a much leisurely pace. Most people, however, have saved for months or years for this "trip of a lifetime" and they try to pack in as much as they can in a small amount of time. This is, unfortunately, at the expense of the kids, who can't be pushed that hard. It's most times very HOT, HUMID, and CROWDED. You can't rationalize with the kids.

I remember our DD (17) when she was a toddler saying, "I want to go back to the hotel pool -- I don't want to be at Disneyworld!"

And the adults who are "losing it" are tired and cranky too. It's much better for everyone involved to maybe get up early, when it's somewhat cooler outside, do a few hours in a park, go back to the hotel and either take a nap or lounge at the pool, then return to the park in the early evening.

Oh, and it doesn't matter whether you have kids or not -- I've seen couples going at it with each other too -- losing patience and arguing about things cause they're tired!

 

[piratesmate]

DH & I were there in early 1978. DS wasn't born until 1981. After what we saw on that trip, we always said we wouldn't go back until our children were at least 8. (Financial concerns kept us from going until the kids were 18 & 8.)

On that 1st trip, everywhere we went, childless I'll admit, we saw parents SCREAMING at their children who were crying. The words always included something along the lines of "After all the $$ we spent bringing you here, we're not gong back to the hotel!" I was convinced that Disney was not for pre-schoolers!

When we were there in 1999 & 2001, however, I didn't notice any of that. I can't think of a single instance.

Of course, if you want to talk child abuse . . . . how about the parents who intentionally use their young child as a "shield" when trying to get-ahead-of/cut-off someone in a wheelchair!

 

[RUDisney]

Oh, and it doesn't matter whether you have kids or not -- I've seen couples going at it with each other too -- losing patience and arguing about things cause they're tired!

Guilty as charged. It seems that whenever my DH gets tired and hungry at WDW, he can't make his mind up about what he wants to eat. After a few suggestions from me (he's not a plan ahead PS kind of guy) he gets frustrated and yells at me. I get angy and yell at him because it's only a meal we're talking about... it's not one of life's major decisions. He turns it into one every time.

He didn't do this when we were there with the kids, only when we were there alone. He understood the importance of planning more when we had little bellies with big mouths to feed.

 

[Robinrs]

What I see MORE of that bugs me is the kids that lose it and the parents that DON'T discipline them...

I saw a girl who was about 8 or 9 throwing a FIT at MGM and all the adults around her were all offering her stuff and placating her. I could almost imagine this with a 2 yo but with a child that age it was appalling. My then 7yo son couldn't believe it, either.

 

[Zurg]

A few thoughts.

We have had kids as young as 3 months there age isnt the issue.

Water and staying cool physicaly helps as does how you approch the place.

You aren't going to do it all so don't try.

The pool is mission critical use it.

You will get tired and your better judgement will suffer. So with other folks'.

You or Star only see a few seconds of others experiance and that aint enough to judge.

Then there is that advice about not judging lest you be judged - I think it comes from a well respected source.

 

[disneyjunkie]

Originally posted by Robinrs
What I see MORE of that bugs me is the kids that lose it and the parents that DON'T discipline them...

I saw a girl who was about 8 or 9 throwing a FIT at MGM and all the adults around her were all offering her stuff and placating her. I could almost imagine this with a 2 yo but with a child that age it was appalling. My then 7yo son couldn't believe it, either.

This drives me NUTS!

I think we've all had our moments; both at home at WDW; when we've had to discipline our kids in public. I don't have a problem with that. I have a problem with those who think everything their little angel does is soooo cute.

 

[SuiteDisney]

Everyone gets tired and has a bad day once in a while. Sometimes you snap before you can stop yourself. The important thing is to not strike the children in anger and to apologize when you're wrong. And let's talk about those children....

I have two of the little monsters and they know every button to push. My almost 12 y.o. DD pitched such a fit on this past vacation that when we got back to the room she got the first spanking of her life.

 

[Mishetta]

To me it seems that the people who have the best advice about how to or how not to treat children are the ones who don't have any....

I remember what an expert I was until I had my own!

You're the parent, if they need to be yelled at, then YELL! I agree with Robinrs post!

 

[JAP]

I have seen this from parents at just about every place you take children for enjoyment.

The one thing I know about my kids is their tolerence and what level is the melt down level. Once a melt down starts occuring, it is time for a break. Whether we are at the zoo, ball game, swimming, theme park, or church. Calm is what settles my children down, not yelling.

Now I really need to practice all this calming stuff!

 

[Liz]

The thought that comes to my mind is when these celebrities go to WDW they most likely are not waiting endlessly in long lines, etc. and dealing with many other aspects of a trip that CAN make parents a little irritable when their kids act up!

 

[Sandy51]

Last March, we were in the parking lot at MGM and this mother was SCREAMING at a boy about 10 or 11 years old. She was telling him if he didn't straighten up, they were going back to the hotel and spend the rest of the day in the room. It was 8:00 a. m.!! Our thoughts were that family was in for a loooong day.


Sandy

 

[TimeforMe]

Originally posted by Liz
The thought that comes to my mind is when these celebrities go to WDW they most likely are not waiting endlessly in long lines, etc. and dealing with many other aspects of a trip that CAN make parents a little irritable when their kids act up!

Excellent point! Maybe we should let them "borrow" our little angels for a day, huh?

 

[Rock'n Robin]

I can just picture Star Jones in some perfectly matching ensemble saying "tsk tsk" at some overwhelmed parent.
When our kids get disciplined (sometimes I yell, but DH doesn't--calmly puts them in time out, etc.) it isn't because we just feel like being mean, it usually means they have done something wrong--which is the whole point, right?
Case in point--when DD#1 was 9 she wanted a bagel at the Poly concierge and we told her we thought she'd had enough food--but not only did she get a bagel (problem #1--disobeying) she picked one up, PUT IT BACK and picked up another one! (problem #2--touching all the food). DH told her that instead of hanging in the pool with me, DD#2 and DS that morning, she would have to stay with him--and go to Epcot (what a punishment--wish I could be "punished" right now! ). But on the monorail they had a long talk about listening, responsibility, etc.--and she really wanted to swim!
Last summer we were inside Spoodles and DS wandered off (he was 4)--we looked all over for 3-4 frantic minutes before someone said they had him at the bike stand--he wanted to look at the bikes and just left--with me, DH, his sisters AND my parents right there! I did NOT lose it because I know how responsible CMs are with kids, and we were very calm with him about it, but he did have a rather lengthy time out--while I finished a rather large drink!
Many other posters have made valid points--rest kids when they need it, keep them cool, don't overdo--but families who are only having their 'once in a lifetime" trip sometimes feel they need to do it all and everyone ends up frazzled.
I'd like to See Ms. Jones go back with 3 or 4 friend's kids, during the summer, and wait in line like everyone else--then she can complain.
Robin M.

 

[disneyjunkie]

Originally posted by TimeforMe
Excellent point! Maybe we should let them "borrow" our little angels for a day, huh?

Wouldn't it be nice to give them a set $$$ amount, send them to Disney during peak times,(only time I get to go) make them wait in line and plan out their own days.

Then we'll see how they react when the angels get out of hand.

 

[RitaZ.]

To me it seems that the people who have the best advice about how to or how not to treat children are the ones who don't have any....

Exactly!

BTW, my DB and my SIL have tons of parenting advice to offer. They are going to be such fun parents!!!!!

 

[Lucky4me]

I think a lot of it is due to heat and crowds.
When we were there in January I saw no one yelling at their kids or each other. Lots of happy faces walking onto rides with no lines!

 

[cinlee3]

I admit, I lost it a few time with my then 11 yo DS. He is very tempermental and although very sweet and lovable can be a real bear. He doesn't always express what is wrong he just blows up. He didn't want to stay for Illuminations and the rest of us did. I found a nice spot and he kept pushing on me and pulling me saying he wanted to leave. I was so embarrassed and I just stood where I was. I glared and said you will enjoy it

I was feeling a little guilty about making him stay but as the show started I turned around to see the biggest grin I have ever seen. I was so glad I made him stay and he was too.

Kids can go from miserable to elated and back in a moment (especially pre-teens). I just hate it when people look at the instant and don't see what transpired before and after.