Disney movies you avoid with your kids?

[eh24fan]

Is it bad for your children to know what a cross dresser is? My 6 yr old openly talks about lesbians/gays and anything related to that

Mine as well, but part of that has to do with the fact that his uncle on his dad's side is gay. If you ask him what that means, he'll tell you that it means girls who like girls or boys who like boys. I think that it's part of life and something he will be aware of and learn from as he gets older. We often go to a nearby beach that is very popular with the gay and lesbian community, but it's also a family area. Rehoboth is a great town and we love it there. Sure, lots of gay couples, big deal.

 

[rgribik]

We watch any Disney movie the kids want to watch. They like or dislike certain movies for their own reasons. I must be raising a bunch of social misfits, because none of my kids want to sit and discuss why Ariel was bad or why Hercules has differnt gods(all 5 kids go or went to a Catholic Elementary, we go to church every week, and some of us LOVE to LEARN about Greek and Roman mythology). My kids know that movies are movies and stories are stories period! I go back to my old saying,"If you don't make an issue your kids won't make an issue". I like that Lilo is alittle girl with real problems and a real waist! My big thing for my girls is that I wish Disney gave their princesses alittle more waist, less chest and hips Oh, and being the mommy, why do all the moms have to die?

 

[sammyteach]

So do we. We still enjoy learning about the beliefs of other cultures - it's very intriguing. Our minister also supports this. Christians shouldn't be threatened by the religious beliefs of others. We should learn about them and respect them.

Well said if you have a faith it should be strong enough to learn things about others without it threatening your very core.

 

[MindyLuvsMickey]

We let our DS2 watch a variety of things. He loves Peter Pan and enjoys having sword fights with his Daddy. We discuss everything that he watches to help him to understand to the best of his abilities.

He loves Pirates and Harry Potter.

 

[MomNeedsVacay]

I don't know if you all already talked about this, but we bought Dumbo b/c it was a "Classic" .... first of all, I think its pretty boring. THat being said...there is a really weird drunk/trippy scene with the mouse and Dumbo. I had to explain to my three year old--- "Why are they acting so funny, Mommy?" ... also the "black crows" all have very racist overtones. They definitely wouldn't be able to get the drunk elephant and black crows past censors nowadays.

I also don't like how the princesses just need a prince to "save" them from their lives. Cinderella, Ariel, Jasmine, Snow White, Sleeping Beauty- its all about finding a man.
THat being said, I think my children are too young to "get" any of these things and I'm certainly not going to point things out. If they have questions about movie issues, I'll be sure to answer as honestly as I can.

I laugh at outdated movies now, its a piece of our history and a good learning tool showing how much we've evolved in 75 years. For example, I was watching the original King Kong a couple months ago and a conversation ended something like this, "Of course you wouldn't understand, its because you're a woman!!!" I laugh at that and think, wow- haven't we evolved?- or have we?????

 

[bumbershoot]

..... and why do so many mothers get killed! My 5 yo has a friend whose mom died in childbirth and as is, she wonders if I'll die (soon). Explaining why Cinderella, Snow White, Ariel, Bambi, Nemo, Lilo, etc, etc all have dead or non-existent mothers is so odd.....

It's the fairy tale thing. Journey, growth...I've changed SO much since my mother died. You're just a different person afterwards. Hearing people like Madonna and Rosie O'Donnell talk about what their childhoods were like with mothers that died young really opened my eyes that even when you've hardly known different, you're still going to be a different person than you would have been. The things in the movies wouldn't have happened, the people woudln't have grown in those ways, if their mothers (or Lion King, father) had lived.

I can say that now, but for the first few years I was crying ALL the time while watching movies and TV (note to anyone who recently lost someone...don't rent Hanging Up like I did (it was 7 years ago)...it's NOT a comedy for someone who has lost a parent recently!).


Wanted to say that *of course* I limit movies that aren't appropriate for a child's age or personality. I mean, my almost-3-year-old is NOT ready for Pirates, though he's obsessed with the concept of his idea of pirates (in reality pirates are NOT a happy/fun topic!). He can watch Backyardigans' pirate show, but not POTC. But kids differ. My friend's girl could hardly sit through the first half of the first Harry Potter, and her dad was upset her mom had even tried...but then a month or two later he watched Willy Wonka (the original) with her...I'd watch Harry Potter over some of the freakish images in Willy Wonka!!!



As for adult-themed jokes in "kid" movies...who says they are for kids? If they were for kids, they wouldn't have the "name" actors doing voices. Kids don't get it, kids CAN get confused by it...why does Chicken Little sounds like that doctor from that funny hospital show? and so on. The name actors are used to get the ADULTS into the theater, and adults are kept there by jokes for THEM.

And I'm living proof you don't have to explain an adult joke to a kid, they can figure it out LATER. For now they are probably making up their own idea of why it was funny. I was watching Saturday Night Live from when I was 5 (it debuted the day before or after my 5th b'day), and those original episodes got quite raunchy. I thought the show was hilarious, though my 5 year old idea of what the jokes meant was VASTLY different from how my mom was hearing them and how they were meant. Later I figured it out, and was embarrassed to think my mom thought I "got" them, but I'm sure she didn't think that.

But yeah, there's no reason for me to explain that Mia and Tia, the fans in Cars, are flashing their "headlights" at Lightning...for now he can think they are just giving him light to see by, and when he's older he can figure it all out for himself...

That's what I was thinking... someone who's a cross dresser is simply someone who wears clothes typically thought of as being worn by the opposite gender. No need for sexuallity to enter into the conversation at all...

Yep.

 

[QueenGoblin]

....with Snow White we talk about how the animals love her and maybe she is a vet or a Geriatric Specialist (since those little people need her to heplout so much). Cinderella is in training for running a major corporation (I mean really teh corporate world is a backstabbing as those ugly step-sisters, right?). Mulan a military leader, Little Mermaid marine biology, etc....

You are my new hero. The princess thing bugs me too, and with two DD I'm always looking for a creative spin to add to the "be beautiful and get married" storylines.

Some interesting stuff on this thread. I fall into the "let them watch and use it as a springboard for discussion" camp myself (unless I know it is absolutely too nightmare inducing, which has yet to be a problem with DD#1...) but it is interesting to see which movies do cause problems for some families. The racial stereotypes do jump out and bother me as an adult but I'm not sure shielding my kids from it is the answer...the whole "those who do not learn fom their mistakes are doomed to repeat them" wisdom seems to apply.

 

[QueenGoblin]

eek...double post

 

[TnTWalter]

kids enough to debate this issue. We all have our preferred methods, but we all care about the kids and in this day and age ~ that's a BIG deal.



Trish

 

[HPGIRL]

I love disney movies!love: )I think we should prepare for real life siches.Like I said I love ALL Disney movies!!!!!!!!!I can't belive people wold keep their kids from something that educational!


~coming from a kid

 

[SeptemberGirl]

Great topic...my DD is turning 3, so there's a lot she hasn't seen yet. Only "G" rated movies, for instance. I love the Incredibles, but I think it's too sophisticated for her.

No Dumbo or Bambi, b/c they traumatized my mom when she was a kid and they were out on the big screen! So I never got into those and never owned them, and thus my daughter hasn't seen them.

She loves Sleeping Beauty, and likes Cinderella, but the words that come out of her mouth - "Mommy, come rescue me" make me cringe.

We watch only the Playhouse Disney TV - and they have girls who do things there, like Annie and June in Little Einsteins. So I have hope!

 

[blanq]

Is it bad for your children to know what a cross dresser is? My 6 yr old openly talks about lesbians/gays and anything related to that

The "drag" and "cross dresser" terms were used in a teasing and negative way in Mulan, not in a positive way. "Your granddaughter has chosen to be a cross-dresser." Mushu the dragon is sent out with the comment, "lets get this drag show on the road." These comments stuck out out like a sore thumb in the movie. Can't Disney just tell a story without adding material and innuendo inappropriate for the preschool and early elementary set when it is not part of the story? Is it bad for my child to know what a cross dresser is? Absolutely not, and believe me he (currently 13) does. Did my then 5 year old need to be exposed to those terms from a G-rated movie?

In the future, maybe you can rent movies and watch them first to screen out anything you find objectionable.

Gee, thanks for the helpful suggestion. I'll remember that next time.

 

[rwrocksme]

I think we've watched them all. I did, however, choose which movies at which stages of development. Lighter ones during the nightmare years, etc. I still don't like the stampede in the Lion King!

Interesting about Song of the south. We have it on video, and my kids have seen it. They were older when we got it, so we just talked about the content, and enjoyed the movie.

eta: I forgot, I gave away Hunchback. I really hated seeing that man throw the mom down the stairs. They didn't need to show it. Of course, I had babies at the time and was hormonal, so I don't know that I would still feel that way!

I do not remember that scene in Hunchback, but I have my own problems with it. I hate seeing them lock someone in a tower jsut because they had a disabliltiy. He isn't a freak or anything becuase his back is crooked...I can't see why that's good material for a kid's movie.


I skip the beginning of Finding Nemo, as well.

Also, I hate the end of The Many Adventures Of Winnie The Pooh. It is terribly depressing..."...where his bear would always be waiting for him." Why did Christopher Robin have to leave his bear? Why couldn't it have ended with them playing Poohsticks? It makes me want to cry just thinking about it!

 

[TinkerbellMama]

Well, to be honest, MOST Disney movies contain things I'd rather not have my son exposed to. Violence, sexism, cultural insensitivity... HOWEVER, I am a big believer in explaining those things to children rather than avoiding them completely. This is life, and I think children's movies touching on universal themes of struggle and conflict can be very educational when discussed between parent and child. We have just started to let our son watch Disney movies, and we explain scary or otherwise questionable parts in language he can understand. If you're wondering which Disney movie I personally find the most fault with, it's Beauty and the Beast. I really love this movie as an adult, BUT, I think it sends a message to little girls that it's okay if you're involved with a "beast"...you can change him if you really try! Which of course is the furthest thing from the truth; ask any victim of domestic violence. Will I let my son watch it someday? You bet, but I'll be right there to explain the misogynistic undertones. I want him to be a critical observer of life, and not just a passive vessel. That goes for more than just Disney movies!

 

[xoprincessmomxo]

Wow. I never got that from Beauty and the Beast. We have always took it as not judging people by their appearances. Thus: the beast looked ugly but had a beautiful heart and Gaston looked beautiful but had an ugly heart. We always think it means to chose friends based on their inner beauty rather than their physical beauty. But, I can see how an adult could take it another way. I don't think that a child will end up marrying an abusive partner some day based on a cartoon, though. They model the important stuff based on their parents: a much more important role model than cartoon characters.

As for the cross dresser reference from Mulan: that's what it's called. Cross dresser....if you dress in clothes of a different sex. All it is, nothing outrageous there. Who cares?

And as for the princesses: Yes, they are a very sexist concept. Should we worry about what a 5 year old is getting out of it? Nope. They're not worried about being a bra burning feminist yet. They are just role playing and having fun. They will grow out of it. And then, unknowingly to them (it happened to me, too ) they will model themselves after someone far more important: their mother. I've never once met an adult when asked who the biggest role model in their life has been, answer: "well, Cinderella of course!"

And the Incredibles? Terrified my daughter! She still talks about that scary baby!

 

[meeskamouska]

Wow. I never got that from Beauty and the Beast. We have always took it as not judging people by their appearances. Thus: the beast looked ugly but had a beautiful heart and Gaston looked beautiful but had an ugly heart. We always think it means to chose friends based on their inner beauty rather than their physical beauty. But, I can see how an adult could take it another way. I don't think that a child will end up marrying an abusive partner some day based on a cartoon, though. They model the important stuff based on their parents: a much more important role model than cartoon characters.

As for the cross dresser reference from Mulan: that's what it's called. Cross dresser....if you dress in clothes of a different sex. All it is, nothing outrageous there. Who cares?

And as for the princesses: Yes, they are a very sexist concept. Should we worry about what a 5 year old is getting out of it? Nope. They're not worried about being a bra burning feminist yet. They are just role playing and having fun. They will grow out of it. And then, unknowingly to them (it happened to me, too ) they will model themselves after someone far more important: their mother. I've never once met an adult when asked who the biggest role model in their life has been, answer: "well, Cinderella of course!"

And the Incredibles? Terrified my daughter! She still talks about that scary baby!

"Bra burnign feminists," as you put it, are the reason your DD have a choice to be like a princess or be a lawyer, doctor, mother, writer, or CEO. I think it is important at any age to realize that you are powerful and capable, not an image perpetuated by social norms. I think that you are right that they are role playing and having fun. I still let my girl do all the princessy stuff she wants...but I throw in substance and add the characteristics to the characters I wish they had. By the way....I haven't burned a bra yet....I need them to keep up my girls.

 

[ballle_98]

As for the racially insensitive things: That doesn't bother me. Instead, it gives a good look as to how much the world has changed since then. It gives a great chance for discussing racism and the need to treat all people equally. My DD 5 has seen Peter Pan many times. At first, she was bothered by the "RED MAN" song and asked why those people were red. One of our friend's is a Native American and "he's not red". So, we just explained a little about the term and the struggle of the Native Americans. No big depth, just enough of what a 5 year old could grasp.
:

When my DD was 7 she was learning bout MLK and she was very confused. She did not understand why people were called "black" or "white". I mean clearly they are not black and white. It's weird because around that age was when she realized that some of her Barbies had darker skin and other had lighter skin.
I am glad that I waited to talk to her after she asked me questions. I mean why would I start pointing out differences to my daughter when she didn't see them?

 

[eh24fan]

Wow. I've been reading all of the replies on this thread and I have to say that I'm surprised by a lot of it. It seems like people are reading a lot more into these movies than is expected. I for one have grown up on Disney movies and I certainly haven't spent my life thinking that girls/princesses need men and need to be saved, that you can change a beast to a good man, that it's ok to disobey my parents and do what I want, etc. And I can also say that my parents never felt the need to "discuss" these things with me. They are movies, fiction, not real life. I always got that I guess, I don't know. I know my older son gets it. It just seems so strange to me to hear all of the movies over analyzed.

 

[meandtheguys2]

Interesting. We talk about stuff, including movies because we enjoy talking with one another. For us it is natural to sit around after a good book, new music, a local play, or movie and laugh about it, or complain, whatever. If there is an issue dealt with, we talk about that too. It is the natural way we relate, here.

As far as fiction goes, there is a lot to learn in fictional works. I would never negate the potential for enlightenment, and education from entertainment, just because it is fiction.

 

[trennr]

Liberal's


Heaven forbid someone get offended.