***Disney Design Addict's Chit Chat,Designs and Pixie Dust! Everybody WELCOME!*** Part 5

[ReAnSt]

Apparently we don't need to discuss alcohol to go on a massive posting frenzy, we have posted almost 190 messages since post 20,000 they are going to kill us in the morning.

Becky

 

[disneyeveryyear]

Kate -

Maybe you and your DH need a copy of this:

Ten Simple Rules For Dating My Daughter
Rule One :

If you pull into my driveway and honk you'd better be delivering a package, because you're sure not picking anything up.

Rule Two :

You do not touch my daughter in front of me. You may glance at her, so long as you do not peer at anything below her neck. If you cannot keep your eyes or hands off of my daughter's body, I will remove them.

Rule Three :

I am aware that it is considered fashionable for boys your age to wear their trousers so loose that they appear to be falling off. Please don't take this as an insult, but you and all of your friends are complete idiots. Still, I want to be fair and open minded about this issue, so I propose this compromise: You may come to the door with your underwear showing and your pants ten sizes too big, and I will not object. However, to ensure that your clothes do not, in fact, come off during your date with my daughter, I will use my electric nail gun and fasten your trousers securely to your waist.

Rule Four :

I'm sure you've been told that in today's world, sex without utilizing a "barrier method" of some kind can kill you. Let me elaborate, when it comes to sex, I am the barrier, and I will kill you.

Rule Five :

In order for us to get to know each other, we should talk about sports, politics, and other issues of the day. Please do not do this. The only information I require from you is an indication of when you expect to have my daughter safely back at my house, and the only word I need from you on this subject is "early."

Rule Six :

I have no doubt you are a popular fellow, with many opportunities to date other girls. This is fine with me as long as it is okay with my daughter. Otherwise, once you have gone out with my little girl, you will continue to date no one but her until she is finished with you. If you make her cry, I will make you cry.

Rule Seven :

As you stand in my front hallway, waiting for my daughter to appear, and more than an hour goes by, do not sigh and fidget. If you want to be on time for the movie, you should not be dating. My daughter is putting on her makeup, a process that can take longer than painting the Golden Gate Bridge. Instead of just standing there, why don't you do something useful, like changing the oil in my car?

Rule Eight :

The following places are not appropriate for a date with my daughter: Places where there are beds, sofas, or anything softer than a wooden stool. Places where there are no parents, policemen, or nuns within eyesight. Places where there is darkness. Places where there is dancing, holding hands, or happiness. Places where the ambient temperature is warm enough for my daughter to wear shorts, tank tops, midriff T-shirts, or anything other than overalls, a sweater, and a goose down parka zipped up to her throat. Movies with a strong romantic or sexual theme are to be avoided; movies which features chain saws are okay. Hockey games are okay. Old folks homes are better.

Rule Nine :

Do not lie to me. I may appear to be a potbellied, balding, middle-aged, dimwitted has-been. But on issues relating to my daughter, I am the all-knowing, merciless god of your universe. If I ask you where you are going and with whom, you have one chance to tell me the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. I have a shotgun, a shovel, and five acres behind the house. Do not trifle with me.

Rule Ten :

Be afraid. Be very afraid. It takes very little for me to mistake the sound of your car in the driveway for a chopper coming in over a rice paddy outside of Hanoi. When my Agent Orange starts acting up, the voices in my head frequently tell me to clean the guns as I wait for you to bring my daughter home. As soon as you pull into the driveway you should exit your car with both hands in plain sight. Speak the perimeter password, announce in a clear voice that you have brought my daughter home safely and early, then return to your car--there is no need for you to come inside. The camouflaged face watching you from the window is mine.

 

[bengalbelle]

I know, Amy (and others) have filled me in on the Cassidy family tree

Sorry, I'm having trouble keeping up

 

[julia & nicks mom]

Maybe Steve should accompany Julia1234 to her parties from now on!

Amy

he refused to go - after hearing about tonight maybe he will go next time!!

and Nick was kissing on Alyssa last time she was here -

 

[KMH1]

Well, I was good and didn't eat Captain Crunch right before bedtime, but little miss Alyssa is going to be up bright and early, so I really should head upstairs.

Thanks for tolerating my teasing tonight, youngins!

Don't worry, I will go back to picking on the Queen tomorrow.

Amy

 

[itslisa]

I almost died laughing. I swear they should have a support group for wives of bad gift giving spouses. Our first Christmas after getting married my new DH gave me an alarm clock. The next year a waffle iron, I don't even like waffles he does!

Yikes! DH has been told VERY clearly that, in general, women DO NOT want a git that plugs in!! He should thnk THRICE before such a gift. (for me electronics is definitely the exception!)

 

[tink2020]

Kate -

Maybe you and your DH need a copy of this:

Ten Simple Rules For Dating My Daughter
...

Someone sent that to my dad when I was in high school. I LOVE it!

 

[Blueeyes101817]

i love those 10 rules--im gonna have t o show those to my dad!

When i was dating my boyfriend in high school, he came over and my dad took him out to the back porch...my dad knew him as my brother played baseball with him , but he looks out to the backyard and goes "if you hurt my daughter, i will bury you two backhoes deep and no one will ever find you " hahaha

 

[tink2020]

Sorry, I'm having trouble keeping up

Well, I can't understand why.....

 

[Blueeyes101817]

Well, I was good and didn't eat Captain Crunch right before bedtime, but little miss Alyssa is going to be up bright and early, so I really should head upstairs.

Thanks for tolerating my teasing tonight, youngins!

Don't worry, I will go back to picking on the Queen tomorrow.

Amy

haha...this youngin is used to it!
have a good night amy!

 

[tink2020]

Well, I was good and didn't eat Captain Crunch right before bedtime, but little miss Alyssa is going to be up bright and early, so I really should head upstairs.

Thanks for tolerating my teasing tonight, youngins!

Don't worry, I will go back to picking on the Queen tomorrow.

Amy

Goodnight! I'll try and brush up on my pre-1983 Pop Culture before next time

 

[ReAnSt]

Have a good night Amy.

Becky

 

[julia & nicks mom]

Kate -


I may appear to be a potbellied, balding, middle-aged, dimwitted has-been. But on issues relating to my daughter, I am the all-knowing, merciless god of your universe.

this and the sex with a barrier method are my favorite!!!

 

[Steamboat Marti]

Kate -

Maybe you and your DH need a copy of this:

Ten Simple Rules For Dating My Daughter
Rule One :

If you pull into my driveway and honk you'd better be delivering a package, because you're sure not picking anything up.

Rule Two :

You do not touch my daughter in front of me. You may glance at her, so long as you do not peer at anything below her neck. If you cannot keep your eyes or hands off of my daughter's body, I will remove them.

Rule Three :

I am aware that it is considered fashionable for boys your age to wear their trousers so loose that they appear to be falling off. Please don't take this as an insult, but you and all of your friends are complete idiots. Still, I want to be fair and open minded about this issue, so I propose this compromise: You may come to the door with your underwear showing and your pants ten sizes too big, and I will not object. However, to ensure that your clothes do not, in fact, come off during your date with my daughter, I will use my electric nail gun and fasten your trousers securely to your waist.

Rule Four :

I'm sure you've been told that in today's world, sex without utilizing a "barrier method" of some kind can kill you. Let me elaborate, when it comes to sex, I am the barrier, and I will kill you.

Rule Five :

In order for us to get to know each other, we should talk about sports, politics, and other issues of the day. Please do not do this. The only information I require from you is an indication of when you expect to have my daughter safely back at my house, and the only word I need from you on this subject is "early."

Rule Six :

I have no doubt you are a popular fellow, with many opportunities to date other girls. This is fine with me as long as it is okay with my daughter. Otherwise, once you have gone out with my little girl, you will continue to date no one but her until she is finished with you. If you make her cry, I will make you cry.

Rule Seven :

As you stand in my front hallway, waiting for my daughter to appear, and more than an hour goes by, do not sigh and fidget. If you want to be on time for the movie, you should not be dating. My daughter is putting on her makeup, a process that can take longer than painting the Golden Gate Bridge. Instead of just standing there, why don't you do something useful, like changing the oil in my car?

Rule Eight :

The following places are not appropriate for a date with my daughter: Places where there are beds, sofas, or anything softer than a wooden stool. Places where there are no parents, policemen, or nuns within eyesight. Places where there is darkness. Places where there is dancing, holding hands, or happiness. Places where the ambient temperature is warm enough for my daughter to wear shorts, tank tops, midriff T-shirts, or anything other than overalls, a sweater, and a goose down parka zipped up to her throat. Movies with a strong romantic or sexual theme are to be avoided; movies which features chain saws are okay. Hockey games are okay. Old folks homes are better.

Rule Nine :

Do not lie to me. I may appear to be a potbellied, balding, middle-aged, dimwitted has-been. But on issues relating to my daughter, I am the all-knowing, merciless god of your universe. If I ask you where you are going and with whom, you have one chance to tell me the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. I have a shotgun, a shovel, and five acres behind the house. Do not trifle with me.

Rule Ten :

Be afraid. Be very afraid. It takes very little for me to mistake the sound of your car in the driveway for a chopper coming in over a rice paddy outside of Hanoi. When my Agent Orange starts acting up, the voices in my head frequently tell me to clean the guns as I wait for you to bring my daughter home. As soon as you pull into the driveway you should exit your car with both hands in plain sight. Speak the perimeter password, announce in a clear voice that you have brought my daughter home safely and early, then return to your car--there is no need for you to come inside. The camouflaged face watching you from the window is mine.

I'm so glad I'm raising a son!! (better warn him about guns and fathers!)

 

[bengalbelle]

Did anyone else here ever attend an Andy Gibb concert? I did at our State Fair in like 1978 or so.

No, but my mom took me to a Shaun Cassidy concert in about 1978. He was wearing a blue sparkly jumpsuit and I just knew I was going to marry him because my name was Dawn. Shaun and Dawn Cassidy

 

[disneyeveryyear]

this and the sex with a barrier method are my favorite!!!

I have trouble picking a favorite. I think the shotgun, shovel and five acres is right there.

I laugh out loud every time I read these.

 

[julia & nicks mom]

Goodnight! I'll try and brush up on my pre-1983 Pop Culture before next time

1983 - you are YOUNG!!!

 

[bengalbelle]

Very close Jennifer. This time he is a brother, but not a Bee Gee. He was the youngest and he had a solo career. Died young. He was actually before my time too, but I used to watch Behind the Music a lot.

Amy

Before your time? How old are you?

 

[disneyeveryyear]

No, but my mom took me to a Shaun Cassidy concert in about 1978. He was wearing a blue sparkly jumpsuit and I just knew I was going to marry him because my name was Dawn. Shaun and Dawn Cassidy

Sounds like a lovely couple to me.

 

[tink2020]

1983 - you are YOUNG!!!

Yeah well.... not much I can do about that one