Disarming Rude People at WDW (aka, how not to let rudeness "Harsh Your Mellow")

[BabyPiglet]

I believe that the mom's comments show that she is very sensitive to the way her children's behavior affects others. It was an apology for pete's sake, and children's behavior IMHO is more complicated than rocket science sometimes. I think that the criticism was unwarranted and rude.

Are there really parents of children out there who have never stretched their kids and their own limits...especially on vacation???? Heck , vacation can be taxing for adults. Should kids have to stay home until they adults?

I always get compliments on my kids in public and at their school - how nice they are, well-behaved, mannerly, kind, etc., but no one is perfect, and there is A LOT of pressure on parents to be so.

Unless, the mother (or her children) were directly rude to you, your comments were extremely unkind. Perhaps you would do better to visit a less child-oriented type of vacation spot. You'd be less likely to encounter children on planes.

I agree, 100%.

 

[mb1976]

When we were at Coral Reef last Sept. they were extremely busy and were way behind seating people. At this point we were past our reservation time by about 45 minutes. Earlier, just as I was checking in, there was a group of six who had tried to check in but, according to the computer their reservations had been canceled. They said they had not cancelled them and of course were upset. Even though the place was packed management vowed to seat them. Well, everyone was way behind in their seating times and the group began to get agitated. They began to complain loudly and began getting very rude. Most folks around understood the place was busy and were being quite cordial. Not this group. They then began to come up with excuses as to why they should be seated immediatly. When they started on the diabetes excuse I lost it. See, I'm pre-diabetic and understand my condition and plan for the unknown. I had a brand new, yet to be opened, package of glucose tabs just in case I began to suffer from hypoglycemia. I promptly walked over to them and offered it. At that point they just looked at me and shut up. I went back and sat down. For the next few minutes they toned it down. But, then the management seated them ahead of folks who had ressies and had been waiting a long time. I don't know if what I did was right but, it shut them up and the people around us were thankful for that.

 

[tnmomof4]

Half the posts on here are SOOO not where I was trying to go with this thread.

However, I do appreciate the comments that stayed more on-topic. I am glad to hear many people are able to shrug off any rudeness they encounter and continue to have fun on vacation! If I find myself in similar circumstances, I hope I can achieve the same!

Like I said in my posts, you will meet lots of nice people at Disney. I am sure you will be able to shrug off any rudeness. I wouldn't let a rude person ruin my vacation!

 

[mamaLori05]

We have been to Disney a few times and have rarely run into rude people. The one time we did we were at a parade and had been waiting for probably 45 minutes or so. Another family of four just down from us had been there before we got there and were spread out on two king size comforters. (Clearly way more room then they needed) and were about two feet away from the curb. You could tell already they were not having a good time as all of them were fighting with each other (and they were all adultish age). As the parade got closer to starting it started to get more and more crowded, and most people were making room for those who were just coming in to see the parade, and letting younger kids up to the front to view the parade. This family of four was making rude comments all over the place about how they were there for so many hours and were not going to budge to let others in to see. (And they totally did not want anyone sitting in that two feet in front of them) I had no problem with them wanting the spot they had, but I did think it was rude that they would not move closer together to make room for other people. If anyone came too close or heaven forbid, stepped on their comforters they had a hissy. They also wanted no part in letting younger kids up to the front to see. Again they were about two feet back from the curb. They were all adults and would still have been able to see even with kids in front of them. Now, don't get me wrong here, I don't agree with people pushing their way up to the front at the last minute, but I don't see anything wrong with letting kids up to the front to see. I also thought that if they didn't want any kids up in front of them, then they should have moved up themselves. Eventually they just got soo mad they left, and the crowd was very happy about that. Everyone was sick of them complaining.

Personally when I run into rude people I find it most successful when I just ignore their comments. I feel they are usually trying to get some rise out of people and just ignoring them usually solves everything.

Oh, and as a side comment, I give huge kuddos to the mommy on the airplane for also ignoring the comment made and walking away.

 

[DeadHead]

I wasn't going to write about this but - couldn't help myself. In January my DW took my to WDW for my 55th birthday. We were goiing to ride Space MTN, a mid 30's age woman knocked me to the ground just inside the attractions entrance. I got up, never said a word but did give her an inquiring look. In front of a CM she screamed "what the h*** are you looking at?". She then said "that's what you f****** get for walking slow." Which I was not as the attraction had just opened. I almost lost it. A CM who witnessed this came and took DW and I to the front of the line, she said to make sure I was ok but then put us on the next rocket. At the same time another CM gave a serious polite lecture to the woman. She gave the CM a hard time, security was called and escorted with her family from the park. We found out most of this after we got off the attraction, as security was waiting to ask for our side of the situation. I try to ingnore rudeness, this time I came close to not. I always try to remember that I'm at Disney and there to have fun.

 

[Peg]

 

[toocherie]

Oh please,

Most people aren't bothered by kids. However, they are bothered by clueless parents.

As parents we have to be mindful of how our child's behavior effects those around us.

We might think it's cute to watch our kids laugh with glee while playing with the ropes in a line. The person that's getting hit by rope may not agree.

We might think it's cute to hear our child sing the ABC song while waiting for lunch. The other Diners may not agree.

We might think it's cute to let our child play with a spray bottle in a crowded area. The people getting sprayed may not agree.

Most people will bite their tongue and let it go. Others will comment on it.

I love kids. I'm trapped in a room with 21 five-year-old each day.

I expect kids to behave like kids (not mini-adults). I also expect parents to parent.

I think this was very well said . . . . the issue isn't usually the children, it's the parents who think that EVERYONE else should kowtow to them because, after all they're a family and in a "family" place. Just because you're in an environment friendly to kids doesn't mean that having consideration for others should go out the window. WDW/Disneyland was meant by Walt Disney for everyone . . . . not just families with kids.

 

[toocherie]

I had a situation with a rude CM yesterday at Disneyland. I have been eyeing a Hidden Mickey ring at the jewelry store and had decided to buy it--I went in yesterday and asked for it in my ring size, but they didn't have one in the case . . . I asked the CM to please check to see if they had it in stock and she said to me "well, are you really going to buy it, because it will mean calling a manager and everything . . . . "

First, I looked at her in shock and disbelief (along with the friend with me and another customer). And then I asked for another CM to wait on me because it was obvious she had no interest in customer service.

I waited for another CM who did call the manager, and they were great (unfortunately didn't have the ring though . . . . )

 

[dwaters]

From what I have seen in all of the "Rude Guests" threads here on the DIS, it seems that 80% of the stories take place around parade seating. This is why I don't stress about seeing parades- they can't possibly be worth all the hassle involved.
It's really too bad Disney can't come up with a solution, since they have daily parades in all their parks. I don't know what they could do about people fighting over spots and blocking others' views. Portable bleachers? Not very practical....I guess be more proactive in letting guests know about good behavior (like those signs in WDW bathrooms on how to wash your hands)

 

[toocherie]

I also don't do the parades or the fireworks unless I am partaking in a tour or something where I get preferred seating--in my case it's because I have two artificial knees and can't easily get up and down off the ground.

Good observation on your part that parades seem to generate a lot of the issues--again it's the "entitlement" issue some people have that they have paid for their ticket, why shouldn't they be able to show up 5 minutes before the parade and get a good view?

The other area that seems to be the genesis of rudeness are strollers and ECV use. I have to say from the perspective of someone who has on occasion used an ECV that it is unbelievable the number of people that dart in front of you like you're not even there--rivaled only by the threads I have read where people have crawled over children in strollers to get where they want to go. So I think there's rudeness on both sides (both the stroller/ECV drivers and those around them).

 

[GrowingUpDisney]

What if someone is deliberately rude to a parent with a tired, cranky kid?
Do we need another thread for that?? just kidding.

I agree...I've been in so many situations with my kids during which their behavior and/or my reaction could be confusing for curious on-lookers. But at the end of the day, I am the best judge as to how to handle my own children, and other parents are usually the same for theirs. It's extremely rude for strangers to comment on others' ability to parent, and that's why the above conversation took place.

I completely agree - especially when said "person" doesn't have children but knows how to parent them.

 

[martina857]

Know what ? Some of you people NEED to learn some tolerance !

Martina

 

[merryweather20]

Umm, I was NOT the poster who experienced this. And I don't think that kids should stay home, and I know that kids sometimes act up. The difference being that this parent did something that they HAD to know would not end with their kids being well behaved. The parents basically set their kids up to be cranky and unruley, and then were like oh well, what can you do. What you can do is NOT run your child until they are exhausted. There is no excuse to do so, and then to throw said child on a plane and think that they will somehow be little angels is just stupid, no other word.

And I don't take that mom's comments as an apology. To me it sounded like she was making an excuse for their bad behavior, and all the person who posted that encounter did was call her on her bad parenting choice.

I don't understand how you can think the children's behaviour was predictable My Mom would do the same thing so that we would be sound asleep on the plane.

I don't fault the original poster for making his/her comments though he/she sounded like they were just cranky from a long day at the parks

 

[CapeCodMouse]

We have only encountered a few rude people on our past few trips to WDW. We have chosen to ignore them. If they want to stoop so low, go ahead. No skin off my nose. I refuse to stoop to their level. We always sit down with my DS6 before going on any trip and review the "rules" - use your manners, be aware of people around you, no whining, etc. Most of the time, HE's the one that points out rude behavior (as in "Mom, did you SEE that person? How RUDE! ) Usually we only have to remind him a couple of times.

We DO NOT do the parades in Disney-- period. It's just not worth it.

 

[EMom]

I wasn't going to write about this but - couldn't help myself. In January my DW took my to WDW for my 55th birthday. We were goiing to ride Space MTN, a mid 30's age woman knocked me to the ground just inside the attractions entrance. I got up, never said a word but did give her an inquiring look. In front of a CM she screamed "what the h*** are you looking at?". She then said "that's what you f****** get for walking slow." Which I was not as the attraction had just opened. I almost lost it. A CM who witnessed this came and took DW and I to the front of the line, she said to make sure I was ok but then put us on the next rocket. At the same time another CM gave a serious polite lecture to the woman. She gave the CM a hard time, security was called and escorted with her family from the park. We found out most of this after we got off the attraction, as security was waiting to ask for our side of the situation. I try to ingnore rudeness, this time I came close to not. I always try to remember that I'm at Disney and there to have fun.

Kudos to the CMs/security who escorted this family of "rudies" (my DD's term) out of the park! They deserve a halo and a bonus. If this consequence happened more often, I believe we'd see less knocking over, stroller ramming, line-cutting, stepping on people waiting for parades, etc.

That being said, except for Little Miss Ram My Foot we didn't run into much rudeness at all. A bit of cluelessness at times, but who isn't guilty of that when you're map-staring or trying to figure out if it's the regular entry or fast pass entry? No harm done. A few times, when dining was very crowded, a loud person would come in and demand to be seated immediately since they were staying at that resort. So yes, I'm the one who piped up and said sweetly, "Oh my goodness, we ALL have reservations. Isn't that right? (Looking at the crowd and getting some of them to nod along.) But you are more than welcome to wait here with us. Have a seat." Sometimes I would even point out the people in the group who were also staying at that resort, so they'd realize they were in good company. The CMs loved me. So did the other people in line.

Yes, people bumped into me occasionally. They apologized and I accepted. I bumped into folks a few times myself and did the same. There's a world of difference between an honest accident and an intentional ramming. I think a common theme I see is that parents.....especially mothers....often go all mother bear when someone intentionally or carelessly hurts their child. That's just nature. If some clod steps on our child to get a better seat at a parade and couldn't care less that they hurt them, if they intentionally ram our child with an empty stroller just so they can gain an advantage of a few feet, if they knock our kid over to get past them so they can get on a ride faster.....Yes, we tend to get riled up. Not all of us, but many. It is the most basic instinct of a mother to protect their child.....even at WDW. Maybe especially at WDW. (I can't speak for fathers, since I'm not one.) I've seen women who were so mild mannered that they would not say boo to a goose go medieval when someone hurt their child.

Since you have scads of kids at WDW plus scads of people who feel a strong sense of entitlement due to having paid a lot of money for a vacation, (as if ALL of us didn't pay a lot of money too!) you have a potentially volatile situation. Add several months of intense heat and crowded conditions and it's easy to see why things often get tense. But I think most people can forgive honest accidents when the person apologizes. It's when the person did something on purpose OR when they did it accidentally, but then get an attitude and refuse to apologize that things get ugly.

 

[sbpuckett]

I really don't remember any rudeness from our last trip so if it happened, it wasn't major - we ignored it - life has went on. However, I have had instances at local parks where people were rude to my children (running them over, pushing them out of the way, etc) and I can't ignore those things. I normally (loudly) tell the person (as they keep walking) excuse us, just go ahead and run over him next time! They always look back but never apologize. Now, I've had people bump into my children, I've had strollers rammed into my heels or run over my toes, etc but if it appears to be accidental (even if they just aren't paying attention..) I tend to ignore those things or I'll say Excuse me instead... Like most mothers (probably parents in general) being rude to me is one thing but being rude to my children is a completely different situation.

Now, in quite honesty... I'd really like to read more stories on the subject and how people handle it. I think a lot of us would rather not read anymore about the mommy on the plane... not trying to start anything... just trying to turn the thread back around and let bygones be bygones

 

[GothTink]

I think we might all need a nap now

 

[CanadianGuy]

This thread does. Consider it closed.