Dis Breast Cancer Survivors Part II -GAGWTA!

[DeeCeeSW]

Everyone!

Maureen, you will be missed. Have a great time with your son. Glad he is safe. I lived in Los Angeles when I was 9 and remember that part of the classroom curriculum included how to stay safe during an earthquake. We had a couple of occasions where we had to hide under our desks. Tremors. Thought they were cool when I was 9, but now...not so much.

GAGWTA!

 

[laurabelle]

~~~***GAGWTA sistas***~~~

Dawn- What an awesome feeling, I know sista! Congratulations!!!

Maureen- I thought of you and your son when I saw the earthquake hit So. Cal. I have several friends in the area and thankfully all are ok. I hope the rest of your visit there is fun and uneventful!

Laurie- I think with your dx and post men. status that an AI after 5yrs of Tam. is probably the standard protocol these days. It's entirely possible that your onc is already planning on putting you on an AI when you're finished Tam. and he simply hasn't discussed it with you yet. You know, early stage cancer is anything not stage IV. I take it all seriously...

I didn't renew our APs either. I thought about buying them in Sept. but I'm having a hard time justifying the expense right now...being good is so hard! Good luck with getting the extra points!

jackskellingtonsgirl- I pack the same way. I try to put all those important items in at the same time so I am not trying to figure out if I remembered all of it later. I'm sorry there is so much family drama that an attorney is needed and you can't actually talk to you sister. I hope that when your vacation is here you can set it aside (as much as possible!) and enjoy the magic with your family!

Tomorrow is my baby's 12th birthday!!!!! I'm so thrilled to be here to celebrate with her!

 

[snappy]

Thanks Laura, I think you are right about the AI.

We are happy you are here as well to celebrate with your youngest DD and all of us!!

I guess we are all blessed many ways. I am always thankful to be able to come to this thread and ask questions and just plain ole vent.

Thanks for listening.

 

[jackskellingtonsgirl]

Laura - My DS is 12.5 today. Maybe if he is good I will give him some extra Disney Dollars for the trip.
Happy birthday to your DD! What do you have planned?
My sister had power of attorney, and she decided to clear out the assets from the estate and keep them for herself. Mom never would believe that was her intent, but it was. My sister illegally removed funds from an account after our father died, which means her POA was no longer valid. Mom was the beneficiary on that account, as well as being owed back child support, but she never filed a claim on the estate to get her money so it may all go to creditors. It's not much money, but it is rightfully hers, not my sister's. My sister and I weren't close before that, so it is what it is. I just don't want Mom to have more to worry about. She has refused to hire an attorney to represent her and my youngest sister, which I think is a huge mistake.

 

[NHAnn]

Dawn and Cheryl.........

I'm thrilled for you both...

Maureen-- I hope the trip and time with your son are a much needed rest/rejuvenation.

jsg....you need a break too, from worry and drama. I hope your trip provides that for you!!

Someone asked about DD's broken elbow......she's still in some pain, she is working, she has it in a sling during the day, does prescribed exercises.
She doesn't see the orthopedic doc until next Monday...but she is not concerned about the wait (as I was), and neither is the camp RN (she called me today, about an insurance question that DD wasn't sure about, as we just switched her to an individual policy ) Apparently the ortho practice wants all "other" insurance info even though this injury is covered by Worker's Comp-)...the nurse was filling out pre-appt paperwork and DD told her to call me with the question, so while I had her on the line I could ask questions without being a pushy helicopter parent to a 21+ year old . So, hopefully, it will heal with no complications...in time....


I know I'm forgetting someone/something........
GAGWTA!!

 

[laurabelle]

~~~***GAGWTA sistas***~~~

Oh my...we were on page 7... we can't have that!!!

jackskellingtonsgirl- Bon Voyage! Have a magical trip!

Ann- You never stop being a mom...

Hope everyone is enjoying today!

 

[snappy]

Ann- You never stop being a mom...

I have often been told this. Must be true. Motherhood permanently changes our chemical makeup.


Hey, DS got an A in his summer history course, still waiting for the sociology course grade.

He may be able to get his tuition scholarship reinstated without interruption!!

Yippee!!!

 

[annrae]

I have often been told this. Must be true. Motherhood permanently changes our chemical makeup.


Hey, DS got an A in his summer history course, still waiting for the sociology course grade.

He may be able to get his tuition scholarship reinstated without interruption!!

Yippee!!!

Hi Laurie: So happy to hear about your DS's A - that is terrific! Let's hope for good news about the sociology course also.

Have a good weekend everyone! Hugs, Barb

 

[Pea-n-Me]

I haven't had time to post but I've been following along. Congratulations, Cheryl - what a relief! (I had my appt and am having XRays of my hips next week.) GAGWTA to everyone.

 

[Pea-n-Me]

My cousin, my mother and I have been keeping a bedside vigil with my aunt every night this week. It was a very difficult decision whether to take her to the hospital or not. Her doctor and NP advised against it, saying even if we "fixed" her this time, she'd be back in the same predicament in a week, as she'd been having lots of these "episodes" over the past month; that this was how the end stage of Alzheimer's presents itself. Unfortunately, it all went down on a weekend and there wasn't a lot of support around for my cousin, who really bore the brunt of the finality of all these decisions. There were also miscommunications so that basically, he had no "official support" from the nursing home until Tues, short of the doc/NP over the phone, and the floor staff who were reluctant to tell us anything, give their opinion, etc.

Annoyed and desperate for help, I went online Tues morning and found the one thing that helped us a lot to be comfortable with the decisions we'd made, which was basically to let her die in peace; that "extraordinary efforts" at this point would prolong her dying, not her living. (Read it here if you like.) We'd also finally gotten in touch with the Social Work dept (we'd left messages for her main SW Monday but he was on vacation unbeknownst to us) and they got Hospice involved. My cousin's priest friend agreed with our course of action and gave his blessing, which helped, and came in and gave my aunt Last Rites. Uggh. So by Tues night, it was sit and wait - for a person who has a very strong body - to die. Very hard for my cousin, who's never had to do anything like that (his father died suddenly). He was still second guessing himself till the end, though he knows in his heart it was the right thing. Just very hard when it's your mother.

She passed away peacefully at 11pm last night. We stayed until the funeral director came to take her body, and at that point my cousin wanted to leave, so we did. (Kind of comically) we got outside and the hearse was blocking my car in so my mother and I not only had to stay to see her being put into the hearse, it was in front of us on the road for quite a while too. The best thing about that (and a little God Wink, maybe?) was that the theme song from Rocky, Gonna Fly Now, was playing on my radio as I followed behind her, and to me, it made a lot of sense.

I am glad she's at peace, finally. What a horrible disease.

 

[Sha]

My cousin, my mother and I have been keeping a bedside vigil with my aunt every night this week. It was a very difficult decision whether to take her to the hospital or not. Her doctor and NP advised against it, saying even if we "fixed" her this time, she'd be back in the same predicament in a week, as she'd been having lots of these "episodes" over the past month; that this was how the end stage of Alzheimer's presents itself. Unfortunately, it all went down on a weekend and there wasn't a lot of support around for my cousin, who really bore the brunt of the finality of all these decisions. There were also miscommunications so that basically, he had no "official support" from the nursing home until Tues, short of the doc/NP over the phone, and the floor staff who were reluctant to tell us anything, give their opinion, etc.

Annoyed and desperate for help, I went online Tues morning and found the one thing that helped us a lot to be comfortable with the decisions we'd made, which was basically to let her die in peace; that "extraordinary efforts" at this point would prolong her dying, not her living. (Read it here if you like.) We'd also finally gotten in touch with the Social Work dept (we'd left messages for her main SW Monday but he was on vacation unbeknownst to us) and they got Hospice involved. My cousin's priest friend agreed with our course of action and gave his blessing, which helped, and came in and gave my aunt Last Rites. Uggh. So by Tues night, it was sit and wait - for a person who has a very strong body - to die. Very hard for my cousin, who's never had to do anything like that (his father died suddenly). He was still second guessing himself till the end, though he knows in his heart it was the right thing. Just very hard when it's your mother.

She passed away peacefully at 11pm last night. We stayed until the funeral director came to take her body, and at that point my cousin wanted to leave, so we did. (Kind of comically) we got outside and the hearse was blocking my car in so my mother and I not only had to stay to see her being put into the hearse, it was in front of us on the road for quite a while too. The best thing about that (and a little God Wink, maybe?) was that the theme song from Rocky, Gonna Fly Now, was playing on my radio as I followed behind her, and to me, it made a lot of sense.

I am glad she's at peace, finally. What a horrible disease.

Like the God wink! am sorry for the troubles your family went through with the decision and the waiting. But as you said, she is at peace

 

[Pea-n-Me]

I didn't want my above post to be too, too long but I wanted to share this with you guys because I know you'll appreciate how cool it was. Yikes, I don't even know how I'm gonna write this one up (pours another cup of coffee; just woke up a little while ago after so many late nights this week)...

I had a really great God Wink this week surrounding my aunt, cousin and uncle (my aunt's husband/cousin's father), who was my Godfather. I was doing a little "spiritual counseling" of my own with my cousin, as best I could, and shared my belief with him that her husband/his father/my uncle would be there waiting for her as soon as she passed, and I said that, in fact, his spirit was likely even around us all now just waiting for her. My cousin kind of did one of these not really in tune to a lot of this stuff or believing in what I was saying. But I told him not to worry, that I was sure of it, though I said to myself I wished there was some way to prove it to him.

The very next morning, I read my email as I do every morning. And I got an email from my SIL about a Jeopardy question re: the Changing of the Guard at the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier (don't think I've ever gotten one of those before) which included some facts and pictures about it. I forwarded it on to a few people I thought would enjoy it, and then called my DS10 over to read it to him as I knew he'd enjoy it too, little military buff that he is...

So I'm reading it to him and I told him that I've been to the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier twice in my life, the most notable time was when I was on a Jr High school school trip. The reason it was notable was that I was standing there watching the guards, when I looked across the way and saw my uncle (in question) standing there (in his typical police officer stance, arms folded across his chest, stern face, etc; I have pictures of it even, he had a yellow shirt on that day). Holy cow, "What's he doing here?", I thought! Turns out he, my aunt and cousin were also on vacation down in Washington, DC - they visited me at my hotel and in usual fashion, slipped me a $20 for myself. (My whole life I've marveled at what a coincidence this was.) So as I'm telling this to my son, BAM, it hit me - here's the confirmation I was looking for!! One of the most notable stories of my life concerning my uncle, the one I'd just hours before assured my cousin was around, comes to me in an email just hours after I spoke about him, and more so, just when I/we needed this confirmation. Simply Amazing!!

This whole God Wink thing is all new to my cousin, but hopefully it brought him a little peace this week, anyway. I know it did for me.

(Oh, and to take this even one step further, Jeopardy came on the TV last night shortly before she passed; we'd been watching Red Sox games all week but there wasn't one last night, not to mention the TV remote was missing so we were kind of just watching things we woudn't normally watch, etc.)

 

[CherylDan]

Linda, I'm so sorry about your aunt. I'm glad you got the confirmation you were looking for, were able to share it with your cousin, and found some peace in it. I hope he did too. Your story about your uncle made me think of a song by (country group) Alabama, called Angels Among Us. If you want, click on the link sometime, there are lyrics and audio.

http://www.mollieb.us/angelsamongus.html

found the one thing that helped us a lot to be comfortable with the decisions we'd made, which was basically to let her die in peace; that "extraordinary efforts" at this point would prolong her dying, not her living.

So very true, and so very hard to do.

Lots of thoughts and pixie dust to you for those xrays next week.

 

[NHAnn]

Linda-- I'm glad your aunt is at peace. My thoughts and prayers to your family.
I love the God Winks. I got John Edwards' "One Last Time" book fromt he library last week and have been reading it...fascinated.

Heading to Massachusetts today to see my dad at the nursing home. He's been having nightmares lately, he says. He is still doing quite well in the regular unit (the secure Alz unit not neccessary yet). He told my brother earlier this week, that he wants a list of all us kids and our kids and what everyone is up to. He's having trouble remembering names and details and wants a written reference. So I'm going to start out maybe with a notebook/scrapbook kind of thing and sit and write stuff out for him for each family (I am one of 7 siblings and my dad has 11 biological grandchildren) and then maybe add pictures for him, I think that would help and comfort him.

Hope you all have a great weekend!
GAGWTA!!

 

[jackskellingtonsgirl]

GAGWTA!

Our trip is off to a good start! Just wanted to pop in and say hello!

Linda, I am sorry for your loss, but I am pleased that your aunt isn't suffering.

 

[snappy]

Linda, my modem got fried during a major thunderboomer Friday or I would have responded to your post about your aunt.

I am sorry for your loss. I am glad your aunt does not have to endure a prolonged death. Your cousin made the right decision, one I am sure she would have wanted had she been able to make decisions at this point. How blessed your family is to have each other for support.

Your God wink story was amazing. The Tomb of the Unknown soldier Jeopardy questions email and memory of your godfather could not have surfaced at a better time. Some might say coincidence, I think it was meant to happen. It is special that you have this special link to your godfather. Aren't memeries just the best?

Thanks for sharing the story. I hope you have been able to rest some since Friday. When is the funeral?

I know the tomb is in DC, I remember visiting it in my late teens/early twenties (so very long ago, LOL). Isn't it located on the mall near to the monuments?

JKG, how is mom? I need to check your trip thread. Which resort are you currently at? Oops, I just read your thread. AKL, very cool. I am going back to reading your trip thread.

We all did mega shopping for the college living this weekend, and dropped a bundle.
It is getting close now, 3 week countdown.

DD12 has a soccer tournament this weekend, they won last night so they play at 2:30 and then 5:30 is they win again.

It is unbearably hot. I do not like summer soccer.

 

[MerryPoppins]

I know the tomb is in DC, I remember visiting it in my late teens/early twenties (so very long ago, LOL). Isn't it located on the mall near to the monuments?

The tomb is in Arlington cemetary. It's actually in Virginia. What a cool Godwink!

I have one of my own to share. My mother just got back from a trip to Kansas City. It's her hometown and she has lots of friends and relatives there. While she was gone, DH and I took care of her house and her dog. Each evening we watered her flowers because it's been over 100 most days lately. Ick. Anyway, one night I had a dream that while we were watering at her house and a car drove up. It was her ex-fiance. I think they really down-deep still loved each other, but just realized that they were like oil and water. They just couldn't make the relationship work, but they did still talk on the phone and keep tabs on each other. Lately, he's been very ill. Had open heart surgery that wasn't very successful and the doctors said they couldn't do any more.

Anyway, in the dream, he got out of the car and I greeted him warmly. He asked where Mom was and I told him she was out of town. His answer was that he REALLY needed to talk to her and I told him I was sorry that he'd stopped by when she was away...that I'd tell her he was looking for her...that sort of thing. When mom got home, I'd forgotten all about the dream, until yesterday.

Mom got a phone call yesterday from his DD. He'd fallen in the night and passed away in his kitchen. He'd known the end was coming and didn't expect to make it through July, his daughter said. A couple of days before he died, he made her promise that when he died she'd call my mom. He wanted her to be one of the first to know he was gone. He said it was important to him. That would have been about the time I had my dream. I told my mom that I have the feeling he was thinking a lot about her those last few days and wanted her to know he was okay, but it kind of made me have goosebumps.

 

[laurabelle]

~~~***GAGWTA sistas***~~~

Linda- I'm sorry for your loss sista...What a beautiful Godwink story.

Melissa-Oh my...that gave me goosebumps too.

jackskellingtonsgirl- Glad you're having fun! I'll have to mosey over to your TR sometime...

Laurie- The tomb is in Arlington National Cemetary, in VA. It's a drive, not far, but a drive from the Mall.

I think we may do one day at the beach this next trip. Since I've been on the Atlantic side a few times, I want to try the Gulf. I read that Clearwater Beach is nice and not a long drive. Have any of you been there?

It's a gorgeous day here! I know it's been so hot everywhere else, we've been lucky! I'm just trying not to get too much sun...

 

[snappy]

Ah, of course that is it, Arlington cemetery. Don't know what is with my brain today.

Merry, another wonderful Godwink!! Thanks for sharing, that one was also a pure gem.

You guys have GOT to check out JKG's sunrise safari on her trip thread. They are absolutely amazing. Now I have to do concierge, absolutely have to, so I can do that safari thing.

 

[annrae]

Hi Linda: I was very sorry to read about your aunt. Letting go is such a difficult decision and I feel very sorry for your cousin. Everyone is so fortunate to have you with them.

Good luck with your x-ray or scan of your hip this week. Hugs, Barbara