Dilemma: Leave one child home?

[3DisneyBuggs]

I was thinking about this and DH mentioned it to me this morning. We will be going with an 8 yo a turning 4 yo and an 18 month old. Bad parents that we are want to leave the 18 mo old home. Not that I want to, I would miss him amd feel gulity that he's not in Disney. But it would make our 17 hr drive eaiser, we could all do most of the rides together, stroller issue would be simpler.We plan on park hopping so that will be easier and we could stay out later. HAs anyone done this or thinking of doing this? I know we will make future trips to the World, which he will probably enjoy even more. Our DD at that age was scared of the characters and screamed whenever they were near.

ANy opinions are welcome.

 

[missmun52]

If you have the option to leave the 18 mond old home i would say do it. I know i took my 17 month old on a 10 hour drive when he was 13 months and i would NEVER want to do it again. He always rides in his car seat NO MATTER WHAT and he just cannot sit in it all day even when we make multiple stops. We took him into malls and let him walk around (he started at 9 mth) and when it came time to put him back in the seat it was terror. I think you might be able to make it at the parks with him if you work around him but as for the drive i dont think he will enjoy it and if you can avoid it then i say do it. He was ok when we did it when he was like 6 and nine months (in laws live in VA we live in NY) but when they get bigger they just cant. For a 17 hour trip even if you split the days into two i think it would still be too long for him.

Hope this helped.

 

[Priorityonecb]

As hard as it would be, I would leave him home...this time! I don't think *he would have a wonderful time with that much time spent in the car and just being that young. What a wonderful gift that would be for your older children to have some "big kid" time with thier parents too. We've taken both of our children on separate trips, leaving the other home. I've never regretted it.

 

[Trena]

As long as he gets to go when he is older, and you have a safe place to leave him (with a Grandma?)...I say go for it.

It is possible to have a good time either way.

 

[LISAMWDW]

Even though you would miss him, I'd also say leave him home. You'll be able to enjoy your vacation so much more and he's so young that he wouldn't be able to do anything or remember. You'll just have to come back again when your 18 mo old is older!

 

[Subrbnmommy]

We brought my then 18 month old dd last year. The drive was surprisingly easy - we sang a lot (The Wheels on the bus, Itsy Bitsy Spider... ), read books, watched movies... Not bad at all. But once we were at MK. She cried in IASW, Pooh & Peter Pan. She was ok in Jungle cruise, Dumbo's and Alladin's Carpet ride. The only thing she loved was the carousel, which we rode over and over again. So, the only ride she likes could be found at the local fair. She was also afraid of the Characters....

Good luck deciding!

 

[gris gris]

We brought DD when she was 4 months old but we had family with us to help out. This time around she will be 4 years old and we've decided we'll leave the new baby (he'll be 6 months old) home with Grandma. We were going to bring him but Grandma offered to watch him and helped us realize that with just the 2 of us it would be hard to get around and enjoy the trip. So we're making this a mom, dad & DD trip. DD wants to bring her brother but he isn't even here yet and I'm sure once he arrives she'll change her mind! LOL I feel bad that DS won't be in any Disney pics, but we'll go again and again so I don't worry too much. Have a great trip!

 

[pperfectmom]

I hate to be the lone dissenting voice here, but I can't imagine taking one child to WDW and leaving one behind. Imagine his questions when he's older looking at the pictures. I think you should spread the trip down over two days and just take your time. Stop at rest areas and let the kids play a while every so often. Then, at the parks you and DH can take turns hanging out with the big kids and riding the BIG rides. Most of the rides are suitable for all ages. You could even take turns going back to your room for a nap. We are taking DD(3) and DS(will be 17 months) in September and I can't wait. My DH and I love the big thrill rides too, but this trip we'll be concentrating on fun for them. Remember that they'll only be babies for a short while and the joy in their eyes will be worth the trouble. Whatever you decide, have fun.

 

[beattyfamily]

I agree with the previous poster. There is no way I could leave one child home so I'd either fly or make the trip bareable by stopping half way and staying at a motel or something.

I just couldn't do it but this is MY opinion. YMMV.

 

[bartleby1]

While you only now what is best for your family, are you sure you could do it? Leave her home, that is? I'm sure you will miss her terribly, and she would miss you too! Would you get there and constantly be doing the "she would have really enjoyed this ride/show, etc" thing? I know that I couldn't do it, but only you know whether you can handle that.

Also, what would you tell your 18 month old about where you are going without her? I have an 18 month old DD right now and she has been in the "me too" stage for at least two months. She is well aware of what her older brother and sister are doing and she wants to be right along side them. At 18 months old, they are old enough to understand much more than we usually give them credit for (even though they usually can't express too much yet)! Would she feel left out? My 18 month old is even helping us take the links off our "countdown to disney" paper chain. She makes sure that she gets a turn with everything by pointing to herself while whining a cute little "toooooooooo". How would her siblings feel not having her there? My older two would not want the little one left out of the fun.

If it is the drive down or possible fear of characters that is making you leary, there are many suggestions that people post on the boards to make things easier. I wouldn't let that be the deciding factor. We have driven from NJ 5 times since my first child was born with varying ages (they are currently 6 yr, 4 yr, and 18 mths) and they have done fine in the car because they knew we were heading to disney.

Like I said before, only you can decide what is right for your family, just be sure you have thought out all the pros and cons first.


ETA: OOPS, so sorry, op! I thought I had read that your 18 month old was a girl. I just re-read your post and realized that he is a boy. I apologize for turning him into a girl in my response, lol! Must be because my little one is a girl .

 

[Harvest02]

By all means, don't feel guilty about leaving your 18 month old at home! My DH and I went to Disney in 2002, at the time our boys were 4 1/2 and about 1 1/2 years old. I really didn't feel like lugging the stroller, diapers, and worry about nap times. My parents watched our 1 1/2 year old, and it worked out fine. Now, we are going back to Disney in 24 days! Our boys are now 9 and almost 6. I am glad we made that decision years ago because I know that he would have never remembered it, and it would have been very stressful for all of us. I know the kids are free if they are under 3 years old, but in my opinion, if you are spending all that money to go to Disney, wait until they are a little older when they can appreciate it and enjoy it.

 

[Bird-Mom]

I couldn't do it. No way. It wouldn't be a family vacation if one of my girls wasn't there. I have taken my older dd at 6 months, 13 months, 23 months, 25 months and 3.5 years. My younger dd went at 15 months. It didn't seem like extra "work" and they both had an amazing time, regardless of if they remember. We have a picture of dd #1 entering EPCOT at 23 months with a huge smile on her face and it really seemed like she did remember. They love to look at the photos.

I was also nursing my older dd on her first 3 trips and I am still nursing the younger one (she will be 26 months on our next trip), so leaving a nursling at home was not an option.

You might look at the message that you are sending to your older children. Are you going to take the younger one on his own special trip? Your older ones are old enough to draw some conclusions that might not be what you are hoping for. My older dd would be devestated if her sister didn't make the trip.

The 17 hour drive would be killer though. My 22 month old hates the 20 minute ride to take big sister to school. Any way that you can fly? Or split the drive up halfway with an interesting stop depending on your route?

Good luck with your choice.

 

[mommystieg]

I know that I couldn't leave one child at home, but that is just me. Only you know how you will feel about it. We took DD#3 last year when she was 7 months old--we drove from Texas. It took us about 24 hours -- we left at bedtime and drove straight through. DH and I took turns napping and driving. We are planning on doing the same thing this year except leaving a little earlier in the evening. This trip DD#3 will be 19 months old and we are so looking forward to her reactions to everything she has been watching on the Walt Disney World website for the past year!! DH uses that site to entertain her while I get DD#2 and myself ready for bed. It is hysterical!! When he logs onto the site, the Epcot page is the first one to load and DD#3 will drop what she is doing and run full speed ahead to the computer. It is her absolute favorite thing to do!! Anyway, only you know what is best for your family. Good luck with your decision

 

[r3ngels]

I couldn't do it...

 

[luvmesometigger]

I hate to be the lone dissenting voice here, but I can't imagine taking one child to WDW and leaving one behind. Imagine his questions when he's older looking at the pictures. I think you should spread the trip down over two days and just take your time. Stop at rest areas and let the kids play a while every so often. Then, at the parks you and DH can take turns hanging out with the big kids and riding the BIG rides. Most of the rides are suitable for all ages. You could even take turns going back to your room for a nap. We are taking DD(3) and DS(will be 17 months) in September and I can't wait. My DH and I love the big thrill rides too, but this trip we'll be concentrating on fun for them. Remember that they'll only be babies for a short while and the joy in their eyes will be worth the trouble. Whatever you decide, have fun.

I have to agree. I just couldn't imagine doing a "family" vacation without my 8 month old daughter. Yea there are times it will be difficult lugging the stroller around and changing diapers and finding a cool quiet place to nurse. But it will be worth it. Even tho she won't remember it, she can still look at the pictures when she is older.
However it is your family and your decision to make. Do what is best for you and enjoy your trip!

 

[Mouse House Mama]

Only you know what's best for your family, but we would never do it. A family trip isn't a family trip unless we are all there. We have traveled to WDW with the kids three times already at various ages (they are currently 4,2,7months) so I know that it requires that we go at a more layed back pace but our memories are priceless. DH and I take turns if one child cannot ride a ride (which rarely happens) and we don't really care about riding all the big fast rides because there will be other trips when they are older that we can all do that together. Now please don't take this as me judging you etc. as I reallly do feel that only you know what's best for your family, but it just makes me wonder what kind of message you are sending to all your kids? If you don't fit into the plans of what we want to do then we will leave you behind? JMHO. I am sure that whatever you decide you will have a great trip.

 

[ChristusG]

I could never do it. I want family vacations to include the whole family, no matter what age they may be. We took my DD at 6 months, 13 months, 19 months, 21 months, and we are about to leave in a few days and she is 25 months. It was so much fun with her each time!

 

[pweyl36]

Oh For Petesake,i Left My 2yr Ds With My Mother In Law When We Went To Disney. Now Hes 4yrs Old And Never Ask Us How Come We Left Him Behind And Took His Sister Too Disney,of Course You Will
Miss Him But You Will Also Have A Nice Relaxing Vac.with Out All Of The Whinning And Fighting Trying To Keep Him In His Car Seat And
Stroller. Trust Me He Will Not Grow Up Feeling Unloved Because
He Didnt Get To Go To Disney When He Was 18mos Old.

 

[snowwite]

I would leave him with the grandparents and take the older kids. Do not feel guilty.An 18 month old is not going to remember that he didnt go to Disney. If I lived in Florida and it was close by I might have brought my kids when they were little.We waited until the kids were old enough to remember it. I decided I wasnt paying all that money for a trip my kids would never remember doing and I still feel it was the best decision.Because DD is 4 years older it was tough because she had to wait for her brother to be old enough. We went the first time when he was 5 and even then it was a bit much for him and we ended up renting a stroller.definitely plan to go back with the whole family when he is old enough to enjoy and remember the trip but have a ball with the older kids this time. He is not old enough to know what you are doing so the posts about the tyoe of message it sends and jealousy are just silly.IMHO. Just call a lot because he will miss you!

 

[BuzzPrincessMom]

It may not be feasible for you, but my BF brought her Mom with them when DD#3 was under 2. Nana helped out and went back to room for nap time. They all met up again later in the day. I have another friend whose parents meet them there. Just ideas.

Only you can decide what is best for your son, and your whole family.