Dilemma about signing up DS for sleep away camp next summer

[Jynohn]

My son will be 12 next year and he's really interested in going to Camp Waziyatah in Maine next summer. He's been to camp before and loved it, but it was day camp, not sleep away. My DH went to Waziyatah when he was younger and said he had the time of his life.

Here's my problem. Zach REALLY wants to go to this camp, but not unless a friend can go with him. I've spoken to some of his friends moms, and they're interested in signing their sons up too, but think it's too early because they might change their minds down the road. But this camp is very popular, even more so now that Disney is airing Bug Juice again which featured Camp Waziyatah. I'm afraid that if he waits for his friends to make a decision he'll lose out on his chance to go. They said they're now receiving over 800 emails and phonecalls a day for information.

The camp is not even accepting applications yet, but they will be in the next couple of weeks and I need to starting putting money aside for the deposit ($1,000 non-refundable). My family is giving me conflicting advice. My dad and DH think I should sign him up regardless. They think he may be miserable the first few days if his friends don't go, but he makes friends very quickly and they think it's a great opportunity for him. My mom and sisters think it's mean to make him go without a friend.

I'm really torn here. I know my son and I know he'll be terrified to go without a friend, but it's true that he does make friends very easily and I really do think he'll have a wonderful time after he gets past the first few days. Any advice from parents who've sent their kids to summer camp?

Thanks!

 

[bsnyder]

It it were me, I'd talk to your son. At 12, he's old enough to understand this dilemma. Explain to him that if he waits until he's certain that he has a friend to go with him, that he may have waited too long. And that if you put down the deposit, that it's non-refundable and he will be committed to going even without a friend. Then let him make the final decision.

I'd play up the aspect that one of the biggest pluses of summer camp is the chance to meet other kids from different places and make new friends.

 

[IMGONNABE40!]

That is exactly what I was going to say. If you are willing to send him either way, then let him make the decision.

 

[Kallison]

I would sign him up if he wants to go. From the list of activities he might not be with his friends anyway. It looks nice.

 

[Jynohn]

Thank you very much for the advice so far. I have talked to my son and told him that if he waits too long he probably won't get to go. The thing is, he really does want to go, but said if his friends don't go, he doesn't want to either. I've told him that most of the kids there go without friends and they'll all be in the same boat when they get there. I've also told him how this is an opportunity for him to do something that many other kids don't get to do and he could possibly make friendships there that will last him a lifetime.

Here's the thing, my dad and DH think I should sign him up regardless of what he says. They say that he may be mad at me at first, but will thank me for it later. Again, my mother and sisters think that's a terrible thing to do.

From what I've seen on Bug Juice and the information Waziyatah has sent me, plus from my DH's experience there, I know that he will have a wonderful time if he'd just give it a chance. In fact, I wish I could go!

So, I guess the question is, should I sign him up now, even though he doesn't want me to? His friends' parents want to wait until at least this winter to make a decision, and I know it will be too late by then.

Thanks again!

 

[IMGONNABE40!]

If it were me, I would sign my son up under the circumstances you describe. You know your son best.

 

[Jenn Lynn]

I have never been a joiner. If my Mom had not forced me to do things I never woulda have done anything.

I say sign him up. A friend is a comfort zone, but I'm sure he will make new friends who he may keep meeting up with in the years to come.

From what you have posted about him I also think he will thank you later.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

Give him a deadline to think about it. Tell him you are signing/not signing him up on XXX. He has to decide.

 

[bsnyder]

If he is adamant about not going without a friend, I wouldn't sign him up. It sounds like the chances are slim that he'd actually end up having a friend going with him, and that you'll be in the position of forcing him to go. Not a good way to start a first camping experience, IMO.

Even if you're right when you say that you know he'd end up having a good time if he gave it a chance, under the circumstances of you having to force him to go, he may very well not be able to get over that and enjoy himself. There are too many other enriching activities you can spend that kind of money on.

If you can't get him to agree to go, regardless of the friend issue, I'd look for some other activity that you can both agree to spend that money on.