Did you throw your dc an 8th grade GRAD party?

[mrspaha]

I never had graduation parties for my 2 kids--not from 8th grade or high school, and certainly not from kidergarten or pre-school. Right after their high school graduation ceremony, we went out to dinner at the restaurant of their choice and invited their grandmother to join us. To be honest with you, I don't think we did this for 8th grade -- as I recall, they weren't interested in doing this. My daughter used to tell me that just about EVERYBODY had graduation parties (8th grade and high school) and the kids looked forward to it to see how much money they would get. I believe it too, because I would hear the kids talk about it. I simply told them the money we saved by not throwing a party, was money we could use for their college education.

Maybe I'm a scrooge, but I personally resent being invited to a graduation party for anyone, when the only time I'm invited to socialize with that family is at a "gift-getting" event.

I guess I'm off the subject a little bit here; I just think that a lot of these celebrations or parties are just excuses to get gifts, and not necessarily events to honor a child for their accomplishments.

 

[Bren's Mom]

Maybe I'm a scrooge, but I personally resent being invited to a graduation party for anyone, when the only time I'm invited to socialize with that family is at a "gift-getting" event.

I guess I'm off the subject a little bit here; I just think that a lot of these celebrations or parties are just excuses to get gifts, and not necessarily events to honor a child for their accomplishments.

I'm totally with you on this one! This is part of why I think it needs to be that dss is performing in school AND I like the Hello HS, rather than a grad party...I would want it to be clear it's to celebrate with him and not a gift giving event. We don't have big bday parties for him like we do for our little one (because he's not into them) but I think he'd really enjoy everyone being together.

 

[Vijoge]

DH3 attended a very small Catholic PreK-8 school. There was an actual graduation ceremony complete with caps and gowns, diplomas, and a graduation Mass. We did have a party as did just about everyone in his class. We rented a big tent and had a BBQ-type lunch for about 25-30 people (family, friends, neighbors).

DH2 attended a similar, although even smaller school. He didn't have a party but we spent the evening of graduation party-hopping as many of his classmated did have parties. Caps, gowns, and graduation Mass at this school also.

DH1 attended public jr. high grades 6-8. There was a cap and gown ceremony in the auditorium and then we went out to dinner at Red Lobster.

None of my boys had HS graduation parties, however. They just weren't interested.

 

[CoP Luv]

Maybe it is a cultural thing because where I am from everyone had graduation parties...I had a graduation party for 8th grade, HS and college! Maybe it was easier for me because my younger sister was exactly 4 years apart from me and we had joint parties...A lot of my friends had parties for 8th grade and high school...maybe not so much for college, but we were having one anyway so why not.

They mostly were just at my parents house...with a BBQ and catered items, in a tent in their backyard. We have a huge family that all lives in Chicago so its tough to get away with a party for under 100 people.

But that's just us. We went out to dinner with a group on the day of my actual graduation or had people over at the house that actually attended the graduation with some dessert.

Not everyone has them, so do what you feel comfortable to do.

 

[Resseda]

I guess I just don't understand the real difference between what you actually do (take your son out on the last day of school EVERY YEAR "just to celebrate the end of the year") and what you are criticizing ("a celebratory lunch for Kindergarten graduation with a six year old").
I think it is nice that you go out for lunch, I guess I am missing something.

Because for my HS aged son, it is a tradition we started when he came to live with us. A graduation, to me, is a note-worthy occasion that begets a "reward". Our year end dinner is no different, to us, than our Christmas Eve tradition of going to Burger King (because they are the only place open). It's a time to sit and share. Our school year ending dinner is our time to sit and reflect on the year...not a reward for finishing the year. I guess I can see where some people might confuse the two.

The concern I have is not rewarding a child-by all means, go for it. Kids need positive re-enforcement. But when every achivement is rewarded all the way through school, kids end up leaving High School/College (and yes, I do see this in the younger employees I have currently) with a sense of either disappointment that their every achievement is no longer rewarded in "the real world" or a sense of entitlement that everything they do should be rewarded. Honestly, if they've been rewarded for every little thing, then I can see where they would expect that to happen.

Ress

 

[jrmasm]

Nope. My oldest is in 8th right now. At the end of the year, she will have passed 8th but not graduated from anything.

 

[Minniemouse07]

I don't consider it "graduation" from elementary, middle school, or jr. high.

IMHO graduation is from high school and college.

Dd did "graduate" from preschool, but she didn't get a party or gifts.

 

[Nie0214]

Maybe a barbeque for a bunch of friends to celebrate them all moving to high school would be decent enough, but even that I think is a little silly. If I were invited to an 8th grade graduation party for a family member, it would just scream "WE WANT PRESENTS" to me.

I might have had a restaurant-dinner with my parents for 8th grade, but that was it.

 

[cheermom1]

my kids school had a little a ceramony and cake and punch that was it no one else had an after party or gifts or anything of that sort just and end to jr and hello to hs not a big deal - but i do believe in if your school doesn't do anything to at least taking the child out to dinner IF they did well and wasn't lazy....

 

[HunnyPots]

I never heard of "graduation" from 8th grade; its simply promotion from one grade to another. Save the celebrations for something big.

 

[Vijoge]

Well, in our school district they do "gradiuate" from 8th grade. They get an actual 8th Grade Diploma from the School Board with official school board seal signed by the members of the County School Board.

As far as the parties go, that's up to the people involved. In my ex-DH's family, they had parties for nearly everything-Baptisms, First Communions, Confirmations, Graduations, Engagements, Weddings, etc.

What they didn't have was the big annual birthday party.

 

[blanq]

No 8th grade "graduation" party for our DS. In fact, when actually does graduate from HS, I am going to give him the option of a party or he can take the cash and run. I so hope he takes the money. I personally hate these kinds of parties. Call me a party pooper.

 

[SadieDog]

Our school has an 8th grade celebration, but no longer call it a graduation. They have a ceremony and give out some awards and have a dance for 8th graders. When my daughter finished 8th grade, we had a cake. We only invited a few people she is closest too. 1 grandmother, 1 aunt and 2 uncles. My son will finish 8th grade this year and he will also get a cake.

 

[DebMcDonald]

My DD was invited to a pool party at a friends house, it was just a relaxing fun afternoon for the kids, and no we didn't do anything for my daughter specifically for her graduation. High school and College will be what we celebrate.

 

[chocovrdmicears]

While in some minds 'graduating from 8th grade' may not be technically "a graduation"...it is still a huge milestone in a childs life. Sure, we may not think its a big deal in the big scheme of things from where we are all sitting...but transitioning into high school IS a big deal for lots of kids...exciting and scary .
Clearly your DC has some struggles with school but we are only 1/2 through the school year...there is plenty of time for conversations about their performance in school and opportunity for them to improve? Isn't there?
No one says 'celebrating' requires a huge party with gifts...But I think at this point in their life they need as much support and love and postive reinforcement as we as parents can give them, under any and all circumstances.

So to answer your question...yes I would most definately do something to acknowlege/celebrate his or her graduation from 8th grade.

 

[southernbelle5672]

My parents never gave me a party for graduating kindergarten, 8th grade, or even high school.

I would have appreciated the acknowledgement but I think the most important thing to recognize is graduating from high school.

 

[dznyfanatic]

We have the same type of situation this year. My youngest son will be "graduating" from Kindergarten and the oldest from 8th grade. Growing up we only had parties for HS and College, Dh on the otherhand had parties for everything. Dh's sister asked me just last week if we were throwing a big bash for the boys and I just looked at her like she was nuts. I personally see these as rights of passage for the boys because both will be starting new schools in the fall, but I don't think they need big parties and lots of gifts.
I think we will probably just take the boys out for a special dinner to celebrate (just the 4 of us).

 

[Inigo]

No 8th grade "graduation" party for our DS. In fact, when actually does graduate from HS, I am going to give him the option of a party or he can take the cash and run. I so hope he takes the money. I personally hate these kinds of parties. Call me a party pooper.

That's what I did for my son when he graduated HS 4 years ago. He used the money to purchase components and built a computer for college. (Pre-made systems don't have the options serious users need.)

DD graduates this coming May, and she's already made the same decision.

For college graduation, they get the same option.

As for JH/MS graduation, DS skipped the ceremony because he thought it was a waste of time. "Ummm, mom, why are they having a graduation ceremony? It's not like it's a major thing. Everyone graduates from JH." Thank goodness they ended the ceremony nonsense before DD got there. (She would have skipped it too, most likely.)

I do have clients (kids on probation) whose parents throw parties for finishing 8th grade. Some of those parents tell me it's the only graduation they expect their child will ever have. They don't expect their child to graduate HS, so, in most case, the kid doesn't graduate HS.

 

[Bren's Mom]

Hmmm...that brings up something else to think about. I did call the school and they DO have an actual ceremony. BUT...I'm thinking dss will likely want to opt out of it. And that would be another 'no go' for the party, imo. Will have to keep that in mind.

 

[Katie]

At our school, they have a 8th grade :formal: dance.
They go to dinner, limo's, ect. It's almost like a prom.

Instead of having a party,(which to me, it like, everybody bring me gifts please). We took our DD on a cruise with her friends.

My DS is graduating next May from 8th grade. I have already booked a 7 day cruise for him and his best friend ( of course, the mom's are going too..lol).

Both my kids did exceptionally well in MS and my DS lettered (did and will again this year)all 3 sports all three years( the only boy in his class to do SO!).

He elected a graduation cruise over a graduation party. Our school also has a school sponsored trip to Washington DC. Both kids elected to NOT do that, but go to the Caribbean instead!