Freyja said:
Thank you! It actually surprises me how much people seem to be against this decision. Not that it matters, but the OP was not about whether or not we should change rooms with him but only about ideas on how to get the most out of small spaces.
I, too, was surprised at how many people did not respect your decision and help you out with the question you asked. It shows they have their own issues about the "roll of parents" having the bigger room, even though, as you clearly stated, on a practicality level, you don't use it much other than for sleeping.
I applaud you in wanting to do something that will help your DS want to stay home and bring his friends over (so you can keep apprised of what they are doing.)
I was talking to a mom recently who goes out of her way to plan long, weekly trips the beach with her 15 year old DS and his friends, and gives him a weekly allowance to blow at the boardwalk arcade. She says that by her going with them and pretending to be lounging in a beach chair off to the side, she sees & hears EVERYTHING he & his friends talk about
and the quality of his friends. She would know if he, or they started into doing drugs or having unprotected s**, since she spends enough time with them to
know them. She is also considered the "cool" mom,

that his friends feel very comfortable in talking to about issues they feel they can't discuss with their own parents

- and they have.
Now onto your question, living here in NYC, we have
whole apartments the size of a closet to live out of. Many of us even live in one room apartments, called studios. We have to fit ALL the areas of our life into one room and make it flow & work. (This might be great for DS. Not only would he be getting the bigger room to entertain in, but he could reasonably use the space for all his interests & keep his growing need for privacy - and stay home!)
For you & DH, to make a smaller room seem bigger, try scaling down some of the furniture, like dressers. If you still need all that storage of a larger dresser, think UP instead of wide. Buy dressers, bookcases & wall units that are taller than wide. Prime real estate for storage is lost in height. Shelves become a MUST.
Also, think about furniture pieces that can serve double duty. A tall bookcase, or open shelving can double as a room divider, creating a little nook on the other side for a reading or music area. (This goes for DS's room to.) If the bookcase is ugly on the backside, hang a pretty floor length curtain that matches the room & gives a cosy feel.
Oh, yeah, and think about getting rid of your headboard & footboard on your bed, if they take up too much space. Visually, the footboard can cut up the room, instead of allowing the eye to travel across the room.
There are many books on small space living. They might give you ideas of what keywords to do a web search for, in finding pictures instead of buying the books.
Small Spaces books
And, yes, I agree with going to Ikea.

I've targeted a floor to ceiling,
PAX wardrobe unit for my apartment. While it will take up one area of wall, it will free up the walk-in closet for me to make a little artist nook out of.

I don't need to
walk into a closet, but I do need the nook.
Having a separate "room" for my
various art interests will keep that clutter of materials and the oil paint smells contained. Shutting the door will enable me to keep the cat out out my projects, and keep my friends from seeing all the materials laying out, instead of having to tidy my work area during crucial stages of projects, just to entertain.
Good luck on your bedrooms!
