Dec 09 PTR The Molecular change is in full swing. pg40 the pink puppy

[exwdwcm]

so i am a little late to the party- but LOVE your PTR! We are also going in Dec.

I haven't read all the way through- work and home life is super busy right now, so I can only get on when i am at work....ironically. lol----i am taking a 'break' and dis'ing.

anyhow- love all the stories, especially the butt sandwich guy on the plane. And the long lost BFF story with Marzie- how great!

anyhow-i am subbing now and can't wait to read about more of the fun and craziness, sounds like my family!! and i mean 'craziness' in the best way!

 

[disneyaddicted]

Ahem, cough cough, what else are you doing at MK? * taps foot *



DH loves Columbia harbor house, so that's where we are headed for dinner on MVMCP night - never tried Peco's, heard they've got stools now rather than chairs, dont know if that will make any difference to you?! Just read it somewhere and thought i'd mention it - random tip of the day
Can't wait to go to Design a Tee

This trip will be everything you hoped and imagined and more

I should have also mentioned that I am planning on meeting this totally great chica that I have been chatting with on the boards.
Yup I got me a Dis meet! I'm planing on waring my Diser T-shirt that I made for my last trip. I'll be easy to spot.

Last time I went to Pecos they had stools, they're pretty comfy too, low to the grown, not the big tall ones that cut of circulation in your dangling feet.

Design a Tee, never heard of it. I'm gonna totally check it out.

I so wish I could use the smiley faces when I am on my cell,but I can't. If I could,you would see me rolling all over laughing hysterically! You are so funny! I am just loving this a little too much perhaps,because my coworker is down the hall and keeps hearing me chuckle and wonders what the he double toothpicks do I find so funny?
Oh,byw,I love your picture of Kent and how much he loves Disney World.I think I need to go do something like that to my dh....lol
Going back to read on,and no doubt have a few more laughs that I have to try to keep to a low belly chuckle for peace sake...haha.Don't be surprised if you hear from me yet again tonight,I love this! And you are making my long boring night pass a lot happier then I expected it would! Thanks!

Wow, your post made me feel so good. I'm glad that you are enjoying the PTR. I have read some awesome PTR and TR's that have had me rolling and crying with laughter. I like that I can help others do the same. It's good medicine. Thank you for reading. I'm glad to have you hear.

you plans are shaping up great! YAY for Marzi getting her ticket, it is SO real!!!

You know what... that picture is not blown up, but you're right, it damn well should be! Bad momma, I'll go sit in the corner...

Yup, plans are coming together now.

I'm telling you I am so tempted to print out that pic of Madi and hang it in my Disney room! Seriously, it is the cutest thing ever. I love her little face.

I so totally know how you feel!!!!! It's so close, but so far away. Not really far away, but just the anticipation makes it feel so far away. This has been a long week for me. I feel like I've worked like a month straight but it is only Thursday morning!! Almost Friday!! I just keep thinking about how wonderful it will really be and then in the back of my mind I know it will be so much better!!!

I am at 56 days, in 1 minute it will be 55 days, it does seem so close, but yet so far. Less then 2 months, bah, I can do that with both eyes tied behind my back. And once I am back to work the time will go faster.

so i am a little late to the party- but LOVE your PTR! We are also going in Dec.

I haven't read all the way through- work and home life is super busy right now, so I can only get on when i am at work....ironically. lol----i am taking a 'break' and dis'ing.

anyhow- love all the stories, especially the butt sandwich guy on the plane. And the long lost BFF story with Marzie- how great!

anyhow-i am subbing now and can't wait to read about more of the fun and craziness, sounds like my family!! and i mean 'craziness' in the best way!

Welcome to this PTR. The door never closes here, no matter how late you are, everyone is welcomed and I cherish the new friends I meet on here. Thank you for joining in.

Butt sandwhich guy, I sure hope I don't have a repeat of that.
And how crazy is it that I found Marzi after all these years!?! I am so looking forward to seeing her again.

 

[MadilynnsMomma]

I'm telling you I am so tempted to print out that pic of Madi and hang it in my Disney room! Seriously, it is the cutest thing ever. I love her little face.

Go ahead, and when someone asks, say, "That's my DISniece, Madilynn"

 

[disneyaddicted]

Today was my first physical therapy appt. I really like my Dr. He is so on the ball. He said, "I know I have to get you ready to go back to work, but what else do you have going on in your life that you need to be strong for?" So of course I tell him DISNEY in 56 days You're probably wondering if I did the bananna dance, well, yes I did, to the best of my ability anyway.

He was so excited for me, his family goes every other year, they just went last Oct for MNSSHP. So he tells me, "I'm not going to lie, you will be ready for Disney, but you will hurt at the end of the day, even a healthy legged person (he really said healthy legged) is sore by the end of the day." He told me warm weather would be on my side and not contribute to achyness which will be a plus, but that I will probably swell a little. SO he has already prescribed ice for the trip, and said he will have a workout routine for me to do daily to help keep things in check.

The PT went great, he is even working on my back, even though that was from an injury 12 years ago he said having the type leg injury I have changes the whole body because muscles start compensating for other muscles, it even changes the way you walk, so it can lead to back problems.
I like that with each exercise he told me what muscles I was working and how it's relearning to work properly, it was so educational. I am very positive now about the whole thing, he also told me that a positive attitude only helps the process more.

It was my first time driving since my leg injury. I was nervous, but it's just like riding a bike. I did great. And the freedom felt so good. I went to walmart and bought a few travel items. New tooth brush, travel tooth paste, new eye liner. And a pair of those stretchy gloves.

They had no Disney stuff except for HSM and Jonas brothers, walmart let me down. Maybe they will put stuff out later.
I was going to buy a new pair of jeans, tried on several pair, I realized I have gone down a size, I have lost 15 pounds, but I spend my days in sweatpants or velour pants, I didn't realize just how much the weight loss was. SO I decided not to buy new jeans until right before the trip, just incase I lose more, or God forbid gain it back plus some. DH brought Twinkies home tonight, my down fall, I could literally eat the whole box. I was good and didn't eat any, but I did have a handful of candy corn, which isn't too bad, as long as I don't munch on them through out the day a few here and there won't kill me.

And I have reconnected with my country music side. I haven't listened to country music in probably 10 years. I'm all about Metallica and Avenged Sevenfold is a real close second. But I found an old Patty Loveless CD while poking around in the attic and just had the urge to listen to it. So I did.

I love going up into the attic, I like finding stuff that I had forgotten I even owned. It's like shopping when I come across a sweater that I stored away. I came across some good finds today. Like a Christmas Kermit doll from my senior year in high school. McDonalds was doing one of their specials, my Dad had taken a hunting trip to Colorado, and each time he stopped at McD's he got me a muppet. I have Kermit, Fozzy and Ms. Piggy. I was so thrilled. I wish I had room to bring them in my suitcase, I would put them in my window at Pop. But I need the room for stuff I am bringing back. So if I am going to bring anything to decorate the window, it's going to have to be flat. I have a few ideas floating around in my head. I really should get started on it.

This was what I did on our last trip, the garland on the tree was each of our user names on the Boards.
I thought about doing something with each of our favorite characters, but Marzi, Mom and Janis all said Eeyore was their favorite, so I need something with a little more variety, I'll keep thinking. I have a scrapbook party comin gup on the 17th, will probably use the time to work on my window decorations. I can't tell you about it, you'll just have to wait for the TR.

I am rambling so bad, and I could seriously go on for hours about everything, I have so much going on in my head, but I will stop for now and try and get caught up on everyone else PTR's now.

One last thing.

Who is planningon wearing mouse ears on their trip?

 

[disneyaddicted]

Go ahead, and when someone asks, say, "That's my DISniece, Madilynn"

Aww, I am going to do just that. My Disniece I've got tears. I really hope I bump into you all at Disney, I just need to see her in person (would love to meet you too) I bet as gorgeous as she is in pictures, they probably don't do her justice, and my mother would eat Madi up.

 

[Elevationist]

Glad to hear that PT is going well so far!

They had no Disney stuff except for HSM and Jonas brothers, walmart let me down. Maybe they will put stuff out later.

I had the same experience earlier in the week. I want to put a cute little Disney-themed gift bag to surprise DBF with, but it looks like I'll be having to order everything off the internet for it.

One last thing.

Who is planningon wearing mouse ears on their trip?

Me me me! And I'm going to try to get DBF into a pair... wish me luck!

 

[JoJo1980]

Who might that be then, do I know her?! Oooo photo of the shirt please

Ahhh right, just thought i'd mention it incase it was the cut of your circulation type - whoever invented those needs a slap

Design a Tee - is where you erm ... design a T ... shirt! You'll love it because you are totally into that kind of stuff, you must go

I'm glad that your visit to the docs went well and that he said you'll be ok for disney, that's brilliant news!! Keep resting though!!

Yay for getting back behind the wheel and geting some bits from walmart - i'm sorry they didnt have more disney things for you

Well done on the weight loss honey I need to lose loads but just cant get motivated at the moment, too busy with disney

Those muppet toys sound so sweet Reminds me of a set of Gummi Bears pencil tops that i've got, my dad used to buy me one every week from our local shopping centre every week - i've still got them all and they are in great condition

The garland tree is lovely!! I'm so jealous of your crafting ability, can I have a bit of it please?!

We normally buy something when we get to disney - on our first trip I had a Minnie headband with ears and DH got a pirate hat with ears. Last trip we had the bride & groom ears / hats. Think we are going to get xmas hats with ears this time

 

[disneyaddicted]

Glad to hear that PT is going well so far!

I had the same experience earlier in the week. I want to put a cute little Disney-themed gift bag to surprise DBF with, but it looks like I'll be having to order everything off the internet for it.

Me me me! And I'm going to try to get DBF into a pair... wish me luck!

Hallmark had some really cute Disney themed gift bags.

Yay! Ears! YOu gotta get DBF into the ears, I explained it to my travel mates this way.
They are not just Disney mouse ears, they are antennaes that help absorb the Disney magic, it sucks it in and pushes it into your soul, you will still feel the magic without the ears, but it's like cake, you can enjoy the cake, but you won't get all of it unless you lick the plate, so wearing the ears is like licking the plate. YOu are getting every last crumb of Disney Magic!

Tell Ron to lick the plate!!

Who might that be then, do I know her?! Oooo photo of the shirt please

The garland tree is lovely!! I'm so jealous of your crafting ability, can I have a bit of it please?!

We normally buy something when we get to disney - on our first trip I had a Minnie headband with ears and DH got a pirate hat with ears. Last trip we had the bride & groom ears / hats. Think we are going to get xmas hats with ears this time

YOu might know her, she's from your area

SUre you can have some of my crafting ability there you go, use as much as you want

Aha! so you and DH wear the ears! That's awesome! I love my ears, I plan to bring mine, but I also want to get another pair so I can change it up a bit each day. Marzi said she would wear ears too. Mom said she doesn't want to spend money on the ears. She thinks she won't use them again. I wear mine when I am working on my Disney scrapbook, it's for inspiration. I'm going to try and talk her into getting a pair anyway, she can always give them to Jazz when she's done. I'm not sure what Janis is going to do.

 

[xoprincessmomxo]

My husband's band opened up for Avenged Sevenfold a few years ago, before they were super huge. I didn't know who they were, but while they were setting up, they played Grim Grinning Ghosts on the loud speaker, the original ride version of it! I decided they must be good kids if they play Disney music before their very heavy performance.

I'm glad you like your doctor, and also glad that he tells it like it is. It's helpful to have a doctor that understands!

 

[Dizneydawn]

Ty - I am caught up to page 7 and I love you! Thanks so much for the kind words and thinking I was funny in my TR! I still can't believe you read it all last night!

3 Thoughts

#1 you are TY and your sister is BO. Together we have TYBO. I am sure you have heard this a billion times but it cracked me up!

#2 Do not waste your alcohol consumption in Mexico on a margharita. Keep walking to China and get a Peach Snap drink from the Joy of China cart! I don't care if you like Peach or want a Snap. It is by far the best drink ever. Dan is trying to replicate it and it was a huge hit at a party a few weeks ago.
Do watch Illuminations from Mexico (the CS viewing is the best around on the lagoon) but only after you get your 2 drinks in hand cause trust me you will want both!

#3 Don't worry about the parade at MK. I was there a few years ago for the Easter taping and was the same fear of claustrophobia about crowds. (I need to be up as soon as a plane lands. Do not trap my @ss inside the seat with a wall of people in the isle or I will Kung Foo your Grandma.)

So many people want their mug on the camera that the rest of the park is empty and ride lines are non existant!


I will read more later!

 

[MyMuse]

Thankfully, I had a bit of time....at work *coff coff* and now I am caught up with my fav funny PTR.

You crack.me.up!

Re: those fake babies look REAL. Holy buckets. But making them would creep me out a little. I don't like dolls that much. Clowns absolutely terrify me. *shudders*

Re: YAY for Marzi's flight! It feels so official when the flight is booked. Once that done, you KNOW you are going and it's alllll gooooood.

Re: My sis sent me mouse ears when I was there for my bday, along with a bunch of stuff. I love my totebag, that sucker is used all the time. Unfortunately, I don't have the guts to wear the ears out & about at WDW.

You are so creative! I wish I was. I'm left-handed, so I should be super-creative and crafty, right?
I even got the Disney scrpabook with the Jiffy's peanut butter offer earlier in the year and have yet to crack it open!

 

[MICKEY4EVER!]

I'm here! Busy day at work, but I will pop back in and get caught up. By the way, love the pics on your intro page!

 

[nic100308]

Hey Ty!!! So excited that you've started physical therapy, and I am so glad to hear your is well educated and versed in Disney travel. Honestly, that may help you in the long run. He knows the physical demands Disney has, even on a healthy legged person.

Ooo I should have told you that Target has some Disney socks in the $1 section. I picked up Mickey, Kermit and Miss Piggy. I was saving the pictures/story for my "Disney future/must brings" post, but silly me I should have shared the wealth. I didn't realize that you hadn't been driving too!! DUH!! Leg injury!! How awful for you!! I do know that I was going crazy at home, and while I was trying to to go out to the stores and spend, sometimes I'd take the dog for a car ride just to get out. I can just imagine how painfully boring this has been for you! But I too fell into the "napping in the middle of the day because there was nothing better to do" trap. Hey, the dog was sleeping so I just joined her!!

 

[disneyaddicted]

My husband's band opened up for Avenged Sevenfold a few years ago, before they were super huge. I didn't know who they were, but while they were setting up, they played Grim Grinning Ghosts on the loud speaker, the original ride version of it! I decided they must be good kids if they play Disney music before their very heavy performance.

I'm glad you like your doctor, and also glad that he tells it like it is. It's helpful to have a doctor that understands!

OMG!!! They opened for A7X?!!! How awesome! I told Jimmy about that and he is in awe. And I told them about playing Disney music before their performance, I think my Disney dorkdom might be a little more tolerable in his eyes now.

I do have an awesome Dr.

Ty - I am caught up to page 7 and I love you! Thanks so much for the kind words and thinking I was funny in my TR! I still can't believe you read it all last night!

3 Thoughts

#1 you are TY and your sister is BO. Together we have TYBO. I am sure you have heard this a billion times but it cracked me up!

#2 Do not waste your alcohol consumption in Mexico on a margharita. Keep walking to China and get a Peach Snap drink from the Joy of China cart! I don't care if you like Peach or want a Snap. It is by far the best drink ever. Dan is trying to replicate it and it was a huge hit at a party a few weeks ago.
Do watch Illuminations from Mexico (the CS viewing is the best around on the lagoon) but only after you get your 2 drinks in hand cause trust me you will want both!

#3 Don't worry about the parade at MK. I was there a few years ago for the Easter taping and was the same fear of claustrophobia about crowds. (I need to be up as soon as a plane lands. Do not trap my @ss inside the seat with a wall of people in the isle or I will Kung Foo your Grandma.)

So many people want their mug on the camera that the rest of the park is empty and ride lines are non existant!


I will read more later!

I am so excited to have you posting on my PTR. More laughs on the way now. This is the laugh forum, embarassing stories and what not is really appreciated here.

TYBO, Bo and I have always made the reference "TYBO" in the house. You're the first to ever mention TYBO, (aside from Bo and I) We have the Tai-Bo tapes. I remember working out with them and thinking "Yea, I'm a bad@ss now, don't mess with me I will Tai-Bo you into the next dimension." never had to break out my Taibo skills yet, but they are there, waiting for someone to get testy with me.

So the advice is skip the Mexican Ale and go for the chinese booze? I like peach, I can do peach, I don't know what a snap is, is it painful? I don't really care if it is, I'll do it anyway.

MK on taping day might work to my advantage huh, I mean I really don't care to be on camera, it adds 10 pounds anyway. I was thinking on park hopping, which really I would prefer to stay in MK for the whole day, it's still on my original itinerary, I have a back up just in case.

Yup I read your whole danged TR (what you have so far) last night, I kept saying, ok next page I'll go to bed, I just couldn't stop reading, even when I was getting the tired but keep reading with one eye syndrome. I just loved it.
I am currently reading the PTR for it now. A little backwards, it's kind of like watching the sequel then going back and watching the first movie. After reading your TR I know now the butler did it.

Thankfully, I had a bit of time....at work *coff coff* and now I am caught up with my fav funny PTR.

You crack.me.up!

Re: those fake babies look REAL. Holy buckets. But making them would creep me out a little. I don't like dolls that much. Clowns absolutely terrify me. *shudders*

Re: YAY for Marzi's flight! It feels so official when the flight is booked. Once that done, you KNOW you are going and it's alllll gooooood.

Re: My sis sent me mouse ears when I was there for my bday, along with a bunch of stuff. I love my totebag, that sucker is used all the time. Unfortunately, I don't have the guts to wear the ears out & about at WDW.

You are so creative! I wish I was. I'm left-handed, so I should be super-creative and crafty, right?
I even got the Disney scrpabook with the Jiffy's peanut butter offer earlier in the year and have yet to crack it open!

I'm always so envious of people who can Dis while at work, the only thing I can bring up on the computer at work is bridal registries and the Beyond store page.

I know, once flights are booked the trip becomes more real. NO REFUNDS BABY!

You have ears but don't wear them in the parks? I'm pretty sure you are breaking some kind of law there. I won't turn you in though. I can't speak for others, but with me your secret is safe. until I've had a few drinks, then I will rat out my own mother!

I love crafts, but I hate it when my kids call me the crazy fake baby maker, that's worse then being called the crazy cat lady.

I'm here! Busy day at work, but I will pop back in and get caught up. By the way, love the pics on your intro page!

Hey there, I am reading your TR, thanks for the link. I felt so bad for you though, being left out of how many trips. My heart was crushed for you when I read that. But your boy is a little cutie. I'll read more tonight, right now I'm at the part where you guys are eating before the trip and your stomache is bothering you.

Hey Ty!!! So excited that you've started physical therapy, and I am so glad to hear your is well educated and versed in Disney travel. Honestly, that may help you in the long run. He knows the physical demands Disney has, even on a healthy legged person.

Ooo I should have told you that Target has some Disney socks in the $1 section. I picked up Mickey, Kermit and Miss Piggy. I was saving the pictures/story for my "Disney future/must brings" post, but silly me I should have shared the wealth. I didn't realize that you hadn't been driving too!! DUH!! Leg injury!! How awful for you!! I do know that I was going crazy at home, and while I was trying to to go out to the stores and spend, sometimes I'd take the dog for a car ride just to get out. I can just imagine how painfully boring this has been for you! But I too fell into the "napping in the middle of the day because there was nothing better to do" trap. Hey, the dog was sleeping so I just joined her!!

It is nice to have a Dr. who "gets" Disney, and the appt takes so long but we had lots to talk about. He started to tell me about Sea World, I was like "Let's keep it Disney"

When I read in your post, "target has Disney socks in the $1 section." I yelled "Kent, we have to go to Target right now." He said maybe tomorrow, now I know all night I'm going to obsess that the Kermit socks will be all gone by the time I get there.

Boring can be painful, I ran out of things to talk to my dog about. And she can only tell me I'm pretty so many times till even that gets old,, now she tells me how much thinner I look I even read a cook book, bleh! I can't cook so seriously I might as well have been reading a book about rocket science, they are one in the same to me. I can make a pot of coffee, that's about it.

 

[disneyaddicted]

I stayed up all night reading Dizneydawns TR. (so much for wanting to fix my bad sleep habits) Any who this morning DH Kent is flipping out on me because I laughed so much.

Our conversation went like this.

DH: Could you have been any louder?

Ty: probably so, I tried to hold my laughs in.

DH: Well by doing that you managed to just snort all night.

Ty: Well you fart all night.

DH: I'm sleeping, I can't help it.

TY: I can totally understand if you're asleep and all relaxed and a few slip out, but yours fly out with such force, I'm surprised you didn't blow the dog of the bed and she smash head first into the wall.

DH: It's not that bad.

TY: Dude If I were laying next to you, your power fart would have rebroken my leg. Why can't you just be a gentle sleep farter like the normal person.

DH: Because...I'm Captain Flatulance.

Ty: really? Captain Flatulance? You are really going there? TO say you are captain fatulance is insinuating that you are a super hero, there is nothing super about farting and it's definitley not heroic. You're more like the nerdy sidekick, Farty McSkidmark check your drawers dude, you might have damaged them.

DH: I didn't shart! I would know!

TY: you probably blasted a big ole hole out the back of your pants. now there's nothing left to filter the rot smell. Your no flatulant super hero, you're a mega fart villian.

DH: Then either live with it or divorce me.

Ty: I can't divorce you, you might hit the poweball this weekend, once you hit the powerball then I'll divorce you and "I want half"!

DH: you'll get what I give you.

Then he left to go take a shower.
Kent swears he is going to hit the powerball this weekend. I would love the money, but then I'll want to move to Florida for the winter and he'll want to get a girlfriend. A Disney hating girlfriend. Hussy!

 

[MadilynnsMomma]

You and Kent crack me up! Damn that Disney hatin' Hus!


(Hus as in short for Hussy, not Husband - felt the need to clarify my "slang-uage" )

 

[Dizneydawn]

Ty - so I led you two to have a fart coversation - that is a sick threesome if I ever heard one!

Side Fart Story:

My ex - bad gas - hounds of He!! flatulants I tell ya.

Thanksgiving circa 1999 and we are heading back from my Dad's big feast and we have a cr@phole Dodge 1988 Minivan (not the Grand cause being the color of "squished smurf with cream" was only available in the small ghetto version. Again cold out and the beauty of that van is the windows did not role down in the cold. Made drive through's a treat.

Anyway - the ex let's one fly a mile from an oil refinery. Baylor not quite 4 is in the back in his winter gear and proceeds to hurl Pumpkin Pie, Turkey, Stuffing, Cranberries, mashed taters, a biscuit and butter with a side of gravy thrown in for good measure, all down the front of him. In that order. The smells came out one by one I swear.

The Ex - yells "Why did you puke?"
Baylor yells "You smell!"

This lead to a debate whether his butt could make someone vomit. We all voted (5 people) and the only one not in agreement was poopy pants himself.

Now we are a mile down the road and the lovely burnt smell of gas is in the air from the oil refinery.

So we sit like a bad infomercial for 7.3 more miles till home.

With the smell of his @ss, Baylor's potporri of puke and the oil refinery smell trapped in the car with the windows that won't roll down. We were trapped rats and you had a choice of riding with heat on and baking the smell in further or turning off the heat and have no toes left when you get home. I voted for being called stubbs.

I couldn't find anything to breathe through that was not permiated in stench.


Once home - I lifted him Baylor out of the carseat and carried him inside into the tub and started washing him - clothes and all - and when I took off his boots - the sludge poored out because where else would it go if he was leaning over but right down his boots! That's when I lost it.

To this day the kids call Thanksgiving 1999 the year that Dad @ss destroyed the holiday.

Some advice - I sat next to a nurse on airplane one time and the guy in front of us had gas - loud and smelly. She digs around in her purse and I am thinking she is going to find gum, chew it and tell him to place it somewhere that will stick together or plug the dike if ya will! Instead she pulls out a bottle and offered him charcoal pills. Like why would you not have charcoal pills in your purse?

She explained that charcoal absorbed the gas in the stomach and down the pipes until it is out and eats the smell it produced. So even if he did fart - we would not smell it. You can get it at a health food store. I asked her if I could just save money and shove a brisket from the grill up my husband's (at the time) tukkus. She did not find me amusing. This was serious medical stuff and I was acting like, well me.

Other suggestion, how bout have him put a piece of Bounce fabric up his crack. It would muffle the sounds and sure smell better! If he can't reach it well - ( maybe he has Trex arms) give him an old spatula to make sure he gets it in real good. Just don't use it on your chili later.

Ok - back to your regularly scheduled topics!

 

[disneyaddicted]

Ty - so I led you two to have a fart coversation - that is a sick threesome if I ever heard one!


Well...a foursome if you include Kents Disney hating hussy girlfriend.

Side Fart Story:

My ex - bad gas - hounds of He!! flatulants I tell ya.

Thanksgiving circa 1999 and we are heading back from my Dad's big feast and we have a cr@phole Dodge 1988 Minivan (not the Grand cause being the color of "squished smurf with cream" was only available in the small ghetto version. Again cold out and the beauty of that van is the windows did not role down in the cold. Made drive through's a treat.

Anyway - the ex let's one fly a mile from an oil refinery. Baylor not quite 4 is in the back in his winter gear and proceeds to hurl Pumpkin Pie, Turkey, Stuffing, Cranberries, mashed taters, a biscuit and butter with a side of gravy thrown in for good measure, all down the front of him. In that order. The smells came out one by one I swear.

The Ex - yells "Why did you puke?"
Baylor yells "You smell!"


From the mouth of babes

This lead to a debate whether his butt could make someone vomit. We all voted (5 people) and the only one not in agreement was poopy pants himself.


Kent once farted and it caused the dog to dry heave.

Now we are a mile down the road and the lovely burnt smell of gas is in the air from the oil refinery.

So we sit like a bad infomercial for 7.3 more miles till home.

With the smell of his @ss, Baylor's potporri of puke and the oil refinery smell trapped in the car with the windows that won't roll down. We were trapped rats and you had a choice of riding with heat on and baking the smell in further or turning off the heat and have no toes left when you get home. I voted for being called stubbs.


I think I would have turned the heat up, taken my socks off and stuffed them up my nose.

I couldn't find anything to breathe through that was not permiated in stench.


Too bad they didn't have scented tampons back then, that would have worked up the nose too


To this day the kids call Thanksgiving 1999 the year that Dad @ss destroyed the holiday.

that would make a great Sci-Fi movie.

Like why would you not have charcoal pills in your purse?



i could understand if maybe she also had a tiny grill in her purse too, you never know when the need to barbque is going to strike

She explained that charcoal absorbed the gas in the stomach and down the pipes until it is out and eats the smell it produced. So even if he did fart - we would not smell it.


Kent would have to eat so much charcoal he'd end up crapping a diamond!
You can get it at a health food store. I asked her if I could just save money and shove a brisket from the grill up my husband's (at the time) tukkus. She did not find me amusing. This was serious medical stuff and I was acting like, well me.


If you ask me that was a serious medical question. And in my opinion I think the brisket up the hiney hole would help. They just don't want us to know that, it's a conspiracy to make us buy their product and charge us an arm and a leg for a chiclet charcoal.

Other suggestion, how bout have him put a piece of Bounce fabric up his crack. It would muffle the sounds and sure smell better! If he can't reach it well - ( maybe he has Trex arms) give him an old spatula to make sure he gets it in real good. Just don't use it on your chili later.


I like this idea, it would work beter then a scented pon, less dangerous too. I mean you get enough force behind that pon it could shoot out like a missil and someone could lose an eye. But a downey, a slight breeze would pass and we'd smell the fresheness of mountain spring air

Ok - back to your regularly scheduled topics!

that would be farts again.

 

[disneyaddicted]

You and Kent crack me up! Damn that Disney hatin' Hus!


(Hus as in short for Hussy, not Husband - felt the need to clarify my "slang-uage" )

I bet she smells like cheesey feet, all Disney haters do! I'm so much prettier then her, ooh and skinnier too.

 

[disneyaddicted]

Seeing as how the scheduled topic is farts, I think it's only befitting that I post Mothers newest fart song, to the tune of

A dream is a wish your heart makes.

A fart is a noise your butt makes
even when you sleep.

The smell will make your nose ache
because up through the covers it seeps.

Have faith in the power of Beano
that farts won't come sailing through.

And if you just keep believing
then your nose won't be grieving
cause the farts in your dreams won't have fumes.


I know! let's give it up for Pixie guys, isn't she great, she's here all week, come back for her next show. Try the veal!

Here's some food for thought almost literally

Jimmy told me that every time somebody farts, they release little particles of poop into the air.....and we inhale that, we breathe that into our mouths. Gross right.

When Bo and I were kids we would like any sisters have our arguments. Name calling was always a huge part of this. One day my sister called me a Quimby, I was like, so I don't even know what that is. She told me it's a person who sucks farts out of dead chickens. I am soooooo not a Quimby, MooOOOOOMMMMMM! Bo called me a dead chicken fart sucker outer!

Well when Mom got wind of this ( do you like the play on words there, wind...and I'm talking about farts? nobody? well I thought it was funny) anyway Mom gets wind of this and busts out laughing, it's the funniest thing she ever heard.

Years later, I'm talking like last summer, the topic of Quimbys come up again, we are al laughing and Bo asks all serious like, 'but when does the person know when the chicken is all out of farts?" Kent answers.........
Once you hit corn

Please don't make me explain this, if you don't get it PM me, I already think I have pushed the lines with the post, explaining that last joke might put me over it and the Disboards will divorce me.

OK now back on topic...Disney!!!







Do you think the characters fart? I picture Donalds to sound just like the way he talks, it will even sound like the word fart. Go on in your best Donald voice say "Fart"