Dear you . . .

[SyracuseWolvrine]

Dear NCAA,

When you're assigning my Frozen Four tickets, I'd like something between the blue lines, about 10 rows up.

(while you're at it, could you please get rid of the stupid "no cowbell" rule?)

With warmest regards,
Eric

Dear birds,

The middle of the road is not a good place for you to hang out.

Love, Eric

 

[Twinkles6892]

Dear Cristen -

I'm really hurt that you're bringing a friend up here saturday. I really wanted to see you

Love,
Meggie

 

[KMH1]

Dear Body,

Alyssa is almost a year old now. I would greatly appreciate it if you would make some effort to get back to the size 8 you used to be. The whole 9 months in, 9 months out time period has ended. I'm taking you to Jazzercise, and I'm trying very hard not to eat the "bad foods." I know I screwed up your metabolism years ago, by not eating breakfast and lunch, but I have to eat those meals now, because I'm nursing Alyssa and I'm hungry! I promise I'll drink more water. I'd love to lose this double chin by our May trip to Disneyland!

Love,
Amy

P.S. I'm sorry your son doesn't sleep longer Lynette! And thanks for the compliment Rachie0507!

 

[4nana]

Heather & Lynette, Thanks bunches...appreciate it!

 

[nativetxn]

Dear Son and DIL:

I know you've only been married a few months. I realize you want to be married a few years before you have children.

However, I would like to have grandchildren while I can still ambulate without assistance.

Do you think we could speed up this timeline?

Love,
Mom

 

[mickilee]

To my cat!

Get your own pillow! I would like for once some head room on MY pillow at nite. And leave fish alone. He doesnt like you staring and battin at his bowl when you are bored. Fish doesnt like you drinking his water either.

from me, the pillowless one.

 

[Molly Meow]

Dear Legal Office Procedures Instructor:

I'm sorry, it's not fair for you to mark me off for attendance 2 Saturdays ago. I've been trying to be patient, professional, and mature about this, but when you don't answer my emails or phone calls, I find it hard to be an adult.

Plain and simple, if you are more than a half an hour late to class, it is not my fault for leaving. I have better things to do with my time than wait for you to decide to show up. There is a policy in place regarding this: if the instructor has not arrived by 15 minutes after class starts/return from lunch, the students are allowed to leave with no penalty.

With irritation,

Your student


Dear California State University, Stanislaus:

Get your instructors under control and make sure they are thoroughly informed of the policies, and are acting as adults should.

Thank you,

I paid you $2500 for one semester

Whew, I feel better now!

 

[tarmand]

Dear Lysol Maker:

Your product states that it "Kills 99.9% of germs in 30 seconds". Couldn't you put forth the extra effort to make it 100% since that .1% seems to be the germ that keeps taking me down?

Sincerely,
Sickly One

 

[AllyandJack]

Dear ovaries...I thoroughly apologize for the hormones I ingested over the last 10 years, but don't you think it's time you started working????

 

[WDW Poly Princess]

Dear Starbucks-
Thank you for making it possible to function in the morning.
Love,
Crystal

 

[Sparx]

Dear Flavored Water Company

Why must you make your water so addictive? I have drunk 4 bottles TODAY!!! I am wondering if there is a 12 step program. Thank you.

~Addicted.

 

[Beastlover]

Dear Monty Dog

I am never feeding you ziti ever again you dreadfully foul smelling creature. I think I need to go find the lysol spray...

Love,

You human

 

[Disney1fan2002]

Dear 6yo DD,

I am sorry mommy lost her temper with you last night, when you were sick. But, when you came to me at 12:30AM, saying you were not feeling good, I knew that it was your turn for the stomach virus that has been living in this house for a week. Your two brother's have had it, and even daddy, that is why mommy was asleep on the couch when you woke her up. When you said you wanted to sleep near me, you got your pillow and blanket and put it on the floor next to the couch. I know what pre-vomit coughing sounds like, sweety. that is why I insisted you get to the bathroom. you refused to go, because you kept telling me you were not going to throw up. Meanwhile, you kept coughing. For 10 minutes, I argued with you to get into the bathroom. I KNEW what was coming. I know, I should of gotten up, and escorted you to the bathroom, but I was so tired, and I have had a toothache for 6 days. So, when I heard you throw up on the carpet, I just lost it. Between your two brothers, and even daddy, who at the age of 35, can't seem to keep it all in the toilet bowl, I have been cleaning up thow up since last Saturday. Lysol and laundry are my new middle names. I did not want to be pulling out the carpet cleaner at 12:45AM. I did not want to be doing a load of laundry at 1AM.

I love you baby girl, and I am so sorry you are sick. But last night just sent me over the edge, and I am so very sorry.

Love,
mommy

 

[mickeyboat]

Dear Girls -

You are growing up faster than I can remember. It seems like only yesterday you were babies in my arms. I want you both to know how proud I am of the girls you are becoming. I was elated when I ready your report cards today. Keep up the good work.

Now, about putting you in the closet to keep you from growing up, won't you at least consider it?

Denae

 

[Roxter79]

Dear knee,
please stop hurting. I hate wearing the ace bandage because it gets all hott during drumline practice. So please just stop!

-your owner

 

[LindsayDunn228]

Dear homemade lasagna I made last night,

My husband wanted the leftovers from you more than I did so I had a Healthy Choice pizza instead. Don't be mad

 

[Pin Wizard]

Dear ________________ ...

What the heck are you thinking?!

Me

 

[dancergirl]

Dear UGA,
Do you think you could get my roommate assignment out earlier than mid-july? Cause thats just not working with me. I would love to know who Im going to be stuck living with for the next year and where we are going to be stuck living. I'd like to go ahead and get used to the idea.
Oh, and could you let my friend know if he got in pretty quick too. He's transfering, and I would like for him to be up there, a ride home to save gas and a friend to call whenever I need it.
Thanks a ton!
Jenn

 

[bunnyfoo]

Dear Inspiration,

Where have you been lately? We had so many good times, so many good memories. We should get together sometime soon.

If you happen to see our good friend Motivation, bring him along with you! I have a lot of stuff to do and I really need to get crackin'!

Your good friend,
Bunnyfoo

 

[ChrisnSteph]

Dear Aaron and Ryan,

Hello there, my sweet little angel babies. How is it up there in heaven? Daddy and I miss you both so much, and your sister is still very sad, as we all are. Not a day goes by that we don't think of you. Aaron, my happy angel, we miss your huge smile and how you lit up the room like sunshine. I remember how you liked to stare at the fish in your fishtank for hours, how calming it was for you, and how your eyes would light up whenever daddy or I walked in the room. Aar-bear, you taught us how to appreciate life's little moments, and our world has never been the same since the Lord called you home to be with Him. You were such a brave little boy. There was so much so wrong, but yet there was so much that was right. Thank you so much for all the joy you brought to my life. Ryan, our sweet angel, it has only been a month since you joined your brother in heaven, and my heart aches every day. I can barely say your name without crying. I knew that the Lord would lend you to us for only a little while, but I didn't think you'd leave us so soon, or the way that you did. I'm sorry I couldn't protect you from whatever happened. My precious Ry-Ry, you were so beautiful, and such an inspiration to me. Like your brother, you were so strong, and graceful. I miss your bright blue eyes, and your beautiful face. I remember how you would sleep so peacefully, holding my fingers to your chest. I remember how you finally smiled at me when I gave you your bath, just before you went off to the hospital. How I wish I had known that you would not be coming back home. I'm still so angry with myself Ryan, I wish I'd held you more that week, that I wasn't so crabby when you had a bad night. I wish I had taken you to get your pictures done instead of complaining about how cold it was outside. You were such a gift to us, and I miss you so. I know that you are with your brother now, and you are both watching over us. We are so proud of the both of you, you are our heroes. I know that now you both can run, laugh, and play. You're happy, you're home, and you're free. We look forward to the day when we will all be together again. I'll hold you in heaven, my little angels. Sleep tight babies, safe in the arms of Jesus.

With all my love, always and forever,
Mommy