I guess the part I have a problem understanding is how DVC owners somehow feel excluded from various promotions.
We're not. We can take advantage of all those promotions, just like any other person who doesn't own DVC.
Want free dining? Go to WDW during the free dining period, meet the promotion's requirements, and you will get free dining. And you'll be in great company -- many DVC owners stay at other Disney resorts to get free dining.
Like the 4 + 3 promotion (or whatever it is)? Great -- go for it! We have the same access to that as anyone else. Book it! I'm sure many DVC owners will.
We get a lot of good perks, but DVC perks are not always the best perks available.
DDE (now TiW) is a good example. For years, we've gotten restaurant discounts -- typically 10%, but higher for some restaurants for some meals. TiW offers 20% off both food and beverage, including adult beverages. Unfair to DVC? Nah...fully available to DVC owners who meet the other requirements. Like it? Get it.
Annual passes. News Flash! We buy an annual pass every year, but we don't use the DVC discount. Why? Disney has a better deal for Florida residents with some significant blackout dates. But the blackout dates don't hurt us, so we buy the Florida Seasonal Pass and save $100+ per pass over the DVC discounted AP. Is that a ripoff for DVC owners? No, there's just another deal that's better for our family this year.
The right mindset to have for DVC perks is a) anything can always be improved upon, but b) the DVC perks are in addition to the perks available to anyone off the street who meets the requirements of a particular promotion...including us.