DD having difficulty in Kindergarten

[kimmy-man]

Help!
I have my first parent/teacher conference with my DD's kindergarten teacher. I'm so worried! I know she has been having some problems. She is struggling with handwriting. She also comes home with work to complete that wasn't done in class. I see what she does do, and it seems as though she is not putting in any effort. She messes things up that I know she knows!! If I ask her one on one, she gets them right no problem!
We made the decision to send her on to Kindergarten this year, since she was 51/2. But, now I'm worried that we should have kept her back in Pre-K.
I don't know what to do! How can I motivate her to pay attention and to do her best? I'm also worried about the possibility of her being held back.
Anyone else go through this? Any advice?
Thanks in advance!!!

 

[piglet too]

Just lots of hugs for you. I am sure you and the teacher will be able to find the best way to hel pyour DD. Be glad they are taling to you now, and now months from now. Let us know how it goes!

 

[princess lovers mom]

She messes things up that I know she knows!! If I ask her one on one, she gets them right no problem!

has she had her vision checked????

 

[kimmy-man]

She has had both her vision hearing checked. She has no problems there.
Unless you count a selective hearing!

 

[mommytotwo]

If your daughter needs to be held back, it's better to be held back now rather then down the road and to get her the extra help that she needs.
Check to see if her school has a teacher that could help her on the side or get her a tutor or yourself to spend extra time with her in doing activities that are fun, but at the same time that will teach her.
Don't be as nervous at the parent/teacher conference, you don't know what her teacher will say, but kindgarden teachers are usually very nice and sympathetic to what is going on with your child. It's your child's first year in school.
Good luck.

 

[PRINCESS VIJA]

Are you able to go and volunteer in the class? It sounds so simple, but just observing what goes on in the class, and seeing the teacher's strategies, and the focus of teaching, may help you at home to redirect her attention to school. You can use examples you saw in the classroom for conversations or help in homework.

Don't worry about the conferences, go in with all of your questions and concerns written down, that way you won't forget anything.

 

[aimee11621]

ADHD anyone? Attention deficit? Not completing stuff in school?Sorry to blow you away but its nothing to fear.

Ask the doctor for a referral to a neurologist!

This is exactly how we started not completing work in class.

 

[missyc]

My DD has also been doing less than her best in Kindergarten. Not always though. Just when she wants to hurry up and finish so she can go on to centers. These were her words when I asked her about a "scribble scrabble" paper that she brought home. I KNOW she can color good! I thought it was kinda funny! I just didn't tell her that.

 

[kimmy-man]

I have thought of ADD. I really wouldn't say ADHD, based on what I've read. She isn't hyperactive, but does better with one-on-one attention. She does behave in class and most of the teachers say she is very sweet.
My husband has a learning disability. So, I have thought of this possibiltiy. I guess I'm afraid of what I might hear, knowing how he has struggled all his life.

 

[r3ngels]

I wouldn't jump to a learning problem. Just listen to what the teacher has to say. My DD sounds so much like yours. She didn't have a learning problem. She was just having a problem adjusting to kindergarten. It was more structured and academic than her preschool. Now she is almost a straight A student.

Good Luck.

 

[pkasbohm]

This sounds all to fimilar! My ds had the same problem that your dd is having except for it was torwards the end of the year before the first year teacher decided to tell me! After having some long talks with some of our schools professionals i decided to let him go on. This one man told me that the child will learn when they are ready and there is nothing you can do expect having the things there to help when they decide they would like to learn. In my case that was very true! All of the sudden one day he came home and it was like a light clicked on and we haven't had any trouble since then(knock on wood)

So i guess my advice to you is just to hang in there it is only the first quarter and some kids have a hard time adjusting to their new surroundings!

Good luck!!!

 

[Michelle GT]

I went through a very similar thing last year with my son. He turned 5 in July and we struggled with the idea of holding him back. We decided to send him . He had a hard time sitting still, completing work neatly, etc. He struggled a little through the year and we worked at home with him a lot. ( also did reward system for completing home work independently, etc.) He did not have a very good teacher, so we could not rely on him(teacher) for any help or reinforcement at school.
The whole year we worried about him being held back and if he would ever like school etc.
In the end, he did fine. He is in first grade and now comes home to do his homework all by himself. He likes school and seems to have more self confidence also. He has a very good teacher this year and it is obvious in his attitude.

It is hard for the younger kids, because a lot of parents hold back their kids these days, so your 5 year hold can be in class with a 7 year old.

 

[KelliR]

I know EXACTLY what you are going through ... you are describing MY DD when she started kindergarten. When I went to the Open House I came home sick to my stomach! I could see she was floundering and behind the other kids in her class. It was so sad to see, I really felt ill. I spoke to everyone and I tried to help her in the evenings. She had to finish the work she couldn't finish in school and then work extra on letters, etc. It was exhausting for both of us.

She is a very social child and "bright" but immature for her age. She is now 7 ... but she was born 2 months premature.

Anyway ... after much thought and a lot of trauma (for her dad and I) I took her out of kindergarten and put her in a half-day Kindergarten program for the rest of the year. She then started kindergarten again the next September. WHAT A DIFFERENCE A YEAR MADE!!! It was astounding. She had the same kindergarten teacher and she saved some of her work from the previous year - it was amazing ... the scribbling was now coloring and the letters were now legible. ~ She is now doing well in 1st grade but I shudder to think what would have happened if I kept her in kindergarten the first time.

The teacher and counselor at the school helped us with the transition.

Many, many people kept telling me to keep her there and she would improve and catch up - but sometimes a mom just knows. My older DD (now a sophomore) is an above average student - she is in all honors classes and has a 96 + GPA in high school. Silly me, I thought all my kids would be like that so I just wasn't expecting this with the younger one. I did not just pull her out because she wasn't the "smartest" child. I was afraid her self-esteem would plummet because the other kids would tell her her coloring was "bad" etc., etc.

Please feel free to PM or e-mail me if you have any questions. I know I did the right thing, but it was a very hard choice and decision to make.

I know the frustration you are feeling - I hope everything all works out for the best.

 

[ElizK]

I wouldn't necessarily jump to the learning disability conclusion yet either, but certainly don't discount that. Some conditions are inherited, like dyslexia/dysgraphia. If your husband has one of those it might be a good idea to get your DD tested sooner rather than later.

Hopefully it's just an adjustment thing, and she'll get the hang of things soon.