Crazy Griever Update No. 5

[house_of_princesses]

Well, a quick update. The girls and I are still seeing our grief counselor, we're keeping very busy (too, busy!), and generally we're doing well.

However, today would have been our 13th wedding anniversary. The days leading up to today were tough. And today was no easier.

It's amazing how the absence of a child can create less work. The absence of a husband creates untold work. I don't just mean physical labor. It's the everyday decisions, the bumps and bruises, it's the "I miss my Daddy" at 1am times that send me so close to the edge, I fear I may slip down and never find my way back up.

I still haven't had the anger, the 'why him/me' questions. I know God has a great plan for our family. And my faith and hope rest in that. I still feel blessed to have been his wife.

I'm just lonely. Wish I had a shoulder to cry on, someone to hold me. But the only person I've leaned on the past 14 years is gone.

I'm feeling blue and wanted to write some of it down. The Tag Fairies told me I have 'a multitude of DIS friends', and I knew you all would have a listening ear tonight.

Thanks for hearing me.

Vicki

 

[Dan Murphy]

Lots of ears here, Vicki. Memories of John will never be gone. {{Hugs}}


Dan

 

[smilingmouse]

Vicki,

I have never lost a spouse, so I can't say that I know exactly what you are going through. However, I have lost loved ones in the past, so I know how hard it can be. Please try and hold on to your faith, especially at the dark moments. It, along with time, will help you to heal.

Even though I do not know you personally, I want to commend you for the strength and courage that you show in this post. Your girls are lucky to have you for a mom.

Should you ever need a shoulder or an ear, please feel free to PM me....

Take care,

SmilingMouse

 

[JetMom]

I just wanted to send you a {{{{{HUG}}}}}}

I can't even imagine what you are going through. We are all hear to listen and support you whenever you need us.

 

[minniecarousel]

{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}

Hang in there Vicki.

 

[RNMOM]

I think he was pretty lucky to have you too. We are here, all night, some of us. I feel fortunate to be in such a group of people who inspire trust and compasion such as the DIS.

Big {{{hug}}}for you and your children.

 

[Pooh93]

Many {{{HUGS}}} Vicki for you and your girls. I can't imagine what all of you are going through. We are always here to listen when you need a "few" ears. Take care of yourself.

 

[wdwnutze]

{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}. Days like this must make it harder. Glad you checked in to let us know how you are doing. There are always plenty of ears here for you. Keep your faith.

 

[snoopy]

I'm so in awe of your incredible strength and dignity. And you are so articulate. I wish I could be there to just give you a big hug, but I hope a virtual one will do for now.

We are always here to listen. It humbles me to listen. Please do come here whenever you are down (or up!) and we will be here.

I believe God has great things in store for your family as well. Keep the faith, my dear, you do it so well.

 

[jacksonsmom]

I don't have any magic words but thought you could use a hug

 

[BWVDenise]

Vicki
I have been thinking of you and wondering how you and the girls were doing. Thanks for checking in. I'm so sorry for your pain and loneliness.

 

[Liz]

((((((((((HUGS))))))))))) Vicki.

I can tell you are a strong person. You will be able to get through this, even though some days still seem incredibly dark. We are always here for you.

 

[CEDmom]

Vicki,

I've had you and the girls in my thoughts since your original post. You are a tremendous source of strength to them and will continue to be. I'm so sorry today is a particularly hard one for you. Take care of yourself.

 

[DoeWDW]

Vicki, I wish there was something I could do to help make it better, but that power is not in my hands. Know that we are always here to share your ups and downs and to support you when things are looking dark. You are stronger than you know. God has given you grace and strength to get through the hard times you've gone through. He won't let you down. Hold tight to your faith, Vicki, for I also believe God has a wondrous plan for you and your family.

 

[bananiem]

I have no words of wisdom for you but wanted to send a
Please do keep coming back here.

 

[Piglet]

Hugs for you - You have such strength and because of that your girls will be fine. Take it one day at a time. Prayers for your family.

Melinda

 

[vald1977]

So sorry you feel so lonely, Vicki. Sending prayers for you and your girls .

 

[tkyes]

All my best.

{{{hugs}}}


Tamie

 

[Miss Jasmine]

Vicki, I am amazed at how you have dealt (and continue to deal) with this. God gives you the strength you need to get through it one day at a time. Keep looking to Him!

 

[KatelynnsAuntie]

You and your girls are in my prayers, Vicki. I'm sorry this is a rough time for you. I wish I could say something to help ease the pain but I know there are really no words. Sure wish I could give you a real hug, but hopefully you can feel this one (((((((HUGS)))))) and the all the other ones sent your way.