Coping with miscarriage

[kirrrby]

It's been a while since I've been active but I don't have many places that I can find a way to cope with this.

I'm 27 years old. This was me and my husbands first pregnancy. I went to the ER on Wednesday night because I had some bleeding. They did ultrasounds and saw a heartbeat of a baby measuring at 7 weeks and a couple of days. Saturday evening comes, and I saw bright red bleeding (bad sign), so back to ER for me. After multiple ultrasounds they told me there was no heartbeat. So I miscarried sometime in between Wednesday night and Saturday evening. I cried in the ER for almost an hour.

Today I went to the OB/GYN for a follow up/decision appointment. They held the appointment in the same place where I had to sit in a waiting room for 30 minutes with all the happy, healthy pregnant women. It also didn't help that they didn't read any of the notes in my chart from my ER visits and had to re-ask the same questions over and over again. I had a final ultrasound and the baby measured at 8 weeks exactly, it even had a face, so more crying. I have to go back this Wednesday to see if everything was expelled or not, so it's going to be just as painful being in the same waiting room.

I'm a type 1 diabetic and all I can think is that I did something wrong, especially since my blood sugars were out of whack the past week. Everyone says it wasn't my fault but it's hard to not put blame on myself.

We actually had a WDW trip planned in early October because I would have been due around our normal annual visit time in December.

 

[danielocha30]

there are no words to comfort your pain, but rest assured it wasn't something that you did, as hard as it is right now to understand why? I really wish you can heal and try again, you will come out stronger from this experience.

 

[Poohlove]

I wish you much strength and peace at this difficult time. Please know we are here for you!

 

[EilonwyWanderer]

It wasn't your fault. Please understand that miscarriages are extremely common, especially during first pregnancies! We lost our first and went on to have two healthy pregnancies afterwards. It's sad, you should absolutely feel sad and take time to grieve, but you are not alone. This happens to a LOT of women. When I had my miscarriage I felt much the same--that something was wrong with me since my body couldn't do what so many others had done, and I was SHOCKED by the number of women in my family and circle of friends who spoke to me privately and publicly about how they also had one. I wish there wasn't so much stigma about talking about it. It was very helpful to me to know that I was not alone and I hope it is helpful to you.

If you can look on the bright side (and you will want to eventually): you can get pregnant! So there is hope there. That's what I tried to focus on and I've got two beautiful little girls now

 

[danceteachermom]

Sorry for your loss. I have been through two miscarriages...both times we were trying so hard to have a baby. It was heartbreaking. Know you are not alone. I have two healthy amazing kids now...one is 17 and the other is 9. The miscarriages came in between them. It was hard both times. Be kind to yourself. Take some time off work if you can. Allow yourself time to grieve and spend time with those who love you.

 

[22Tink]

I'm so sorry for your loss. I've miscarried twice, once after my first 2 babies and once after my third, and I know how very difficult it is. Please don't blame yourself, it's nothing you did or didn't do. Take as much time as you need to grieve and care for yourself.