Communion Dresses???

[lyeag]

Ok, I am from up North, and I have relatives that live on Long Island and in Westchester County, and I can say it is a whole lot of one upmanship. My mother was from those areas, I was raised in IL. Big difference. My aunt (mom and dad had already passed) freaked when I got married and suggested that my husband and I were going to pay for sodas, beer and champagne at the wedding. She felt it was improper, so to keep family face,she paid for the rest of the bar bill. We had a small yet nice, wedding. Sit down dinner for 60, cocktail hour with food, not cheap..but we did pay for it ourselves.

The whole first communion thing is the same. It is all about who does what and how much it cost. I am sure people will get upset with me... but I have seen it first hand. Weddings, showers, who gets into what private school, vacations, jewelry...... it goes on and on. (of course I am talking about the affluent suburbs)

 

[aka-mad4themouse]

"Hi all, I just happened upon this thread, read it, and was very surprised. Maybe its just the area where we live (Long Island, New York), but probably its because thats what we do in our family, but my daughters communion dress (which was paid for by her nanny) cost with the accessories around $350, her party was planned for 2 years with over 80 guests, a dj, a cotton candy and popcorn machine, and a puppeteer from philadelphia as a performer. It was like a small wedding, I loved planning it, and it was simply beautiful. Can't wait for her sweet sixteen lol."

Then why frequent the budget board???????
My wedding dress cost $350

Just because someone frequents the Budget Board does not mean that they don't have the money to spend on the things that they enjoy. FWIW, our children's communion parties were catered affairs (at home), with rented tables, a tent and a DJ. I also made my DD's communion dress and veil. I spent weeks baking trays of cookies and desserts. It was a labor of love and a special gift to each of my children in honor of a very important day in their lives.

In spite of the expense, I still consider myself to be a bargain hunter. It's not about keeping it all...it's about spending as little as you need to in order to get what you want.

 

[mep319]

Well I'm not going to make my DD's dress...not skilled enough nor do I have the time! lol! It is a religious affair and I refuse to have a mini wedding or a mini wedding dress. I find it incredibily improper on so many levels. To each is own but JonBennet comes to mind. Plus I'd rather save that money for a vacation.

Sillymom...if your nanny paid the $350.00 for the dress then I think you pay your nanny more than I make!

Thanks everyone for the advice...I think I'm going to try Penneys...it really isn't worth the trip to Jersey for me. I also have a 30% coupon for Penneys!

 

[sillysmom]

Gosh, people are a bit snippy on this thread. Number one, I don't frequent the Budget Boards, I only looked through it starting yesterday. And if I didn't look for bargains or watch my pennies, I would have spent much more money on my party than I did. I certainly didn't mean to offend anyone with the description of my daughter communion, It was just so nice is all. Also Nanny is my daughters grandmother, I don't have a Nanny for my child. We are not loaded, just have 1 child and spend our money on her, some of you people are a little snobby here. I would never offend someone if they made less money or couldn't afford what I could, why would you insult someone because they choose to spend their money a different way than you would. I hope your daughters communion is beautiful, and I'm sure she will look lovely in her dress, no matter how much you spend. Hopefully the next person who posts on your thread, will be treated a little nicer.

 

[maryssasmom]

try JC Penney. closer to the date of communion (dd was last May 1) we got her dress at JCPenney. It was originally like $75 but they were having one of their "chocolate bar" sales and we got it for around $40. at our church you are not allowed to wear veils (some girl got hers caught on fire years ago) but we bought this rhinestone headband and our hairdresser broke it off in pieces and had this small ring that she did her hair all up and it was beautiful. the day was amazing.

 

[mep319]

Wasn't meant to be snippy...mostly disbelief and an air of humor that was apparently lost. But you said her nanny...my mother in law cares for my daughter when I work but I never refer to her as her nanny...She is my daugther's grandmother. You also used the nanny w/ a small n not a captial...which would possibly helped up understand it was a pet name for a grandmother...but I also never say my DD's Mommom bought the dress. Had you said that your DD's grandmother purchased the dress... the post would have taken an entirely different tone.

 

[cepmom]

I think she meant to say that the grandmother's name is Nanny - not that she is a "nanny". My Dh had a grandmother that he and his sisters called Nanny.

 

[funnygarcia]

These Communion parties and dresses reminded me ....

In Latino communities young girls have a special party when they turn 15 "Quincenera" . Very much like a mini wedding.
It is to welcome them into the church as an adult.
They go to the church for a special blessing wearing bridal/prom gowns, families hold parties in rented hall , caterer, DJ etc.. The boys, acting as escorts to the young girls, wear tuxedos.
Families go into debt for these affairs. Sometimes they travel to Mexico so all family can attend.

 

[CheapMom]

You never know which threads are going to end up in a heated debate...
who would have thought?!?
Anyway- I just wanted to throw my two cents in -
This is a very special occasion- it is appropriate to mark it as such- how much money is spent I think is very relative to how much you can afford to spend and/or where your priorities are.
We did a simple party. It was very nice. When we went to DD's friend's 1st communion party which was catered and included a live band, a magician, an artist doing caricatures... and so on- I didn't think they were showing off or trying competing to have the best dress... best party... or whatever. It was just a different approach.
Let's not bash Long Islanders or people from affluent suburbs because the parties tend to be more lavish in those places. People everywhere operate within the norms of their communities.

 

[don8life]

Sears. Last year I paid $38 for a $75 dress. They told me they don'e go on sale but they do. They were 20 percent off and I had a coupon out of the paper for $10 off $20 or more.

 

[lindaso]

Wow, this thread sure took on a different tone. I have to pipe up and defend the Long Island bashing. Yes there is some "one-upping" but you'll get that anywhere, not just Long Island. Communions take on all forms here, some in expensive catering halls but most are backyard get-togethers. As for the weddings, yes, weddings here are different. I would never even consider having a wedding without an open bar. But not to be "one-upping" the neighbors, it's just how it's done here. Not right or wrong, just different from other areas. We're really not snobs, we just like our guests to drink at weddings

 

[mom of 2]

Well I am a bargin shopper of all bargin shoppers. I bought my daughters dress two years ago at Sears for $8.00....and it's pretty. It was a little on the simple side so I added pearls, beads and ribbon....and I think it turned out wonderful. Then I was at Target last week and I saw a beautiful pair of white shoes all sequins and pearls and I picked these up for $3.50.
And I am using my sister-in-laws veil from when she was young. I am adding new netting to it and also putting more pearls on the front but this should cost me no more than a few $$$$$$$.

So all in all I should be getting by with a great total of $15.00.....

 

[BethR]

Wow, this thread sure took on a different tone.

Yes it has. But I am confident that everyone can get back to the original intent of the thread - how to find a reasonably priced First Communion Dress.

Thanks!

 

[lyeag]

Honestly, I wasn't trying to bash Long Island, I just mentioned it by name because I have family there and to prove I had some idea of what I was talking about. Sorry if I offended anyone, but I really have seen and heard how some people (notice I said SOME) really think you are uncouth if you don't do such and such for this occassion or that occassion. You are right, different is not wrong, it is just different. I don't think it should be about who spends what, it is a religious milestone for a child.

As for the wedding thing, well we couldn't affort to pay for every beverage that people drank. Like I said we paid for champagne on the tables, all the beer and all the soda. ( and a very nice sit down dinner) That was what we could afford. I wasn't going to go into debt so people could drink. If I remember the bar bill that my aunt paid was well over 500.00 for a reception where only about 30 out of the 60 people drank. I was very grateful that she had offered to pay for it, but to do this day, I don't think it was something we had to do.

 

[MUFFYCAT]

I bought my DD dress at Sears for $15. We went shopping late (end of February).
Macys, JCPenney and other stores didn't have any thng left. Our last resort was Sears. It was an design from previous year so it was on clearance. Most of the other dresses were no higher that $60.00.
I was not going to to the fancy stores and spend over $100.00.
Aside from the beaded mini wedding dresses some girls were wearing, hers looked just as nice as the others.

 

[DianeV]

Our church has a meeting before First Communion to stress to the parents that the focus should be on the sacrament and not the "dress" and the "party". Having such a big fuss party with magicians etc. takes the focus off what the reason really is for making your Communion. And that is to make the sacrament. Yes its a celebration but to compare it to a "wedding" is beyond me!

 

[EEyorelover22]

I didn't read this entire thread, but in our church there are multiple weekends and we were lucky enough to get a later weekend and then the dresses went on sale at JCPenney's and Sears.

 

[mep319]

Trust me, the Phila suburbs are no different than the NY suburbs in as far as the lavish affairs. I just don't agree with nor will I do it. Our communions are on different weekends as well and I've requested ours to be later so hopefully we will get one on sale! I didn't think of that. Thanks!

 

[ckoncurat]

"Hi all, I just happened upon this thread, read it, and was very surprised. Maybe its just the area where we live (Long Island, New York), but probably its because thats what we do in our family, but my daughters communion dress (which was paid for by her nanny) cost with the accessories around $350, her party was planned for 2 years with over 80 guests, a dj, a cotton candy and popcorn machine, and a puppeteer from philadelphia as a performer. It was like a small wedding, I loved planning it, and it was simply beautiful. Can't wait for her sweet sixteen lol."

Then why frequent the budget board???????
My wedding dress cost $350

I want to aplologize, to sillysmom and others. What I meant by my comment is that most people on the budget board are looking to spend LESS on events and products, not more. I didn't mean to make you feel unwelcome, or imply that people on this board are poor. I'm glad your DDs communion was a success and made you happy. My daughters special day (with a $65 dress and a non-catered party at our home) was one of the happiest days of my life. Again, my apologies- I agree that was a snippy comment.

 

[sillysmom]

Thanks to all of you who stuck by my side lol, this is so silly, and thanks for the apology, its not necessary. This is all supposed to be about a beautiful day in our religion and for our children. I was probably a bit over sensitive. Thanks everyone!