i understand where you are coming from. We did the same thing, well, not the cotton candy and stuff, but had a party outside of the home, but mainly because my house wouldn't hold the 40 people, mostly family just 3 were not family, but dd calls them Aunt & Uncle. I was going to suggest Raggamuffins to the OP which is in Mount Laurel, NJ - the NJ side of Philly, but then after reading her full post, decided against. When we bought dd's dress you give the name of the church where you attend and they will not sell the same dress to another girl at that church. Hey, that is what I know, that's how it goes around here. I referred to it myself as a mini-wedding. I, too, loved every minute of it. Yes it is a religious event, but so are weddings and we do the same thing for that. Granted, I do work full-time and feel that this is how I choose to spend my money. I only have one dd and this was not a burden for me. My dd does understand what her 1st Communion meant from a religious stand point and there is nothing wrong with a celebration of something so wonderful. This is one of the many difference between the north and south. I understand that wedding celebrations are much bigger up here too.