Childish Misconceptions

[Blueeyes101817]

bumping for more--i dont want to be the killer of this thread!

 

[slk537]

- I used to think that my mom's makeup compact that said "Mary Kay" on it in lovely gold script was something that belonged to my aunt (Mary Kay, of course) and I couldn't believe my mom would have stolen it!

- I thought that if I got a woodtick on me, it would suck all my blood and I would die. Had a bump behind my ear one day and I was almost hysterical by how I obviously only had days to live.

- We used to go boating every weekend and any time I saw anything floating or sticking up in the water, I was convinced it was a huge octopus skeleton or something. I have NO idea where this came from...the only thing I can think of is Jaws...?

I thought of a few others as I read these, but forgot...this thread is great!

 

[MELSMICE]

As a child when I would go to bed I always thought there were "creatures" under my bed but that if I kept totally covered throughout the couldn't see me, so they couldn't get me.

When my DD's were younger they thought if my DH or I removed our wedding rings it meant we were divorced. They would get frantic if they saw one of us taking them off.

 

[theSurlyMermaid]

When I was young we lived in Virginia. I thought my HOUSE was "Virginia". Had no clue where the neighbors lived, but I knew I lived in Virginia.

Same with my grandmother's house in Poughkeepsie. I thought her house was "Poughkeepsie" and I would get furious when she left to run errands. I couldn't believe she would leave Poughkeepsie.

 

[welovedisneyx4]

My own kids used to believe that a Cathedral near us was Cinderella's castle when they were little. My dh and I would drive by it and say "look guys...there's Cinderella's castle!"

I thought the same thing when I was little!! I couldn't understand why if I could see the Castle, why couldn't we go there? It is kind of on a side road and you could see it from the highway. My parents aren't Disney people (I am working on them!) so they never took me there.

Also, when my BF and I were 10, we would walk over to a small strip mall near her house. We really weren't supposed to, but we reasoned that since we were both 10, that made us 20 and 20 was certainly old enough to walk to the store!!

 

[laurie31]

My dad was a teacher, which led to a couple of my childish misconceptions

First, I thought *everyone* got summers off. It was a real shock when I found out my friends' parents had to work the whole year!

When I started first grade, I was very excited, but at the end of the week I announced to my mother that I was not going back. She was shocked as I had a nice teacher and liked school. She asked me why. I replied, "I've been going there for a whole week and they haven't paid me yet!"

I always wanted an ant farm, and since Mom wouldn't buy me one, I tried to catch my own ants and put them in a jar. Needless to say, this wasn't very successful. One day mom spilled some sugar on the kitchen counter and was careful to wipe up every bit. She said sugar would make ants. Well, this was the wrong thing to say to a little kid who wanted an ant farm I promptly took spoonfuls of sugar and dumped them behind all the doors in the house, and waited for the ants to come! Mom wasn't too impressed...

Finally, when I was maybe 4 or 5, my mom sometimes wore a wig. We were backing up from my grandparents' driveway and my dad hit a tree stump. (they'd had a tree cut down and the stump hadn't been pulled up yet and it was too short for dad to see - but tall enough to hit the back of the car) We all jerked backwards and mom's wig fell off into the floorboard in front of me. I started screaming hysterically, as I thought her HEAD had fallen off!

This thread is hilarious!

Laurie

 

[PneumaticTransit]

I thought chocolate milk came from brown cows.

I was also afraid to order a Coke at my cousins wedding in fear the bartender would give me cocaine. I made sure to specifically ask for a "Coca-Cola drink".

 

[snoopy]

I had this weird thing when I was little where I thought people with the same FIRST name were related. I was convinced Irene Ryan, who played Granny on The Beverly Hillbillies, was my Aunt Irene's mother.

 

[MidNite]

Any more? These make me cry laughing so hard.

 

[Saffron]

I love this thread!!!! Working with three year olds I hear a lot of really cute misconceptions. It's too bad I have such a lousy memory!

Great thread!

 

[Molly Meow]

When I was younger, I thought that the cows on the hill had shorter legs on one side, so they would stay upright...

I also thought that a certain canal road went to Disneyland...

Yes folks, you can thank my Dad for those, and I'm sure plenty others that I can't remember.

 

[momof3disneyholics]

When I was little I used to love pickles and olives. I would sneak into the fridge and eat them late at night. In order to stop me from doing this, my mom told me that if I ate olives or pickles after 7pm then I would sleepwalk. I really believed this up until my later teens. I know, I'm gullible. Even today I still think about it when I eat olives or pickles.

 

[Queenie]

I've always been scared of snakes so when my mum used to turn out my bedroom light, I was convinced the entire floor became made of snakes. My mum also used to have a wardrobe at an angle so there was a gap behind it, I thought a ghost lived there and would always run as fast as I could past her bedroom door!

My sister had a boyfriend who was very ill when I was about 4 and part of the equipment he had was a plastic tube about 3ft long. They told me that a little man lived in the middle of it and if I put the tube to my ear he would talk to me. It took me a long time to realise it was just her boyfriend whispering down the tube as it sounded nothing like him!

My sister gave me a boyband CD when I was about 8 and there were lots of songs about how much he loved his baby. I thought he was singing about his little son or daughter and was confused about why he wanted to kiss them so much and take them out!

 

[DMickey28]

I, too, used to think that there were creepy crawly's on the floor of my room in the dark. I would leap into bed, because since they came out from under the bed, they could still reach and grab me with the lights on! They my mom or dad HAD to come in and turn the light off. If I had to get up and it was still dark in my room, I used my pillow to get me from the bed to the door. Putting it on the ground, then using a second one and repeating until I got to the door.

I used to think that the actors for the shows on tv where really in the tv. I thought Punky Brewster and The Brady Bunch lived in my tv. After the show I would look at the back to see them come out. When they didn't I reasoned that they walked through the wires to the next house where they came on half and hour later... and so on down the street.

I can't think of any others at the time!

 

[fanofmickey]

ALLEGEDLY, when I was 2 or 3, I used to "eat paper". I'd just tear off a piece and pop it in my mouth and chew and swallow. After being told not to do this, I would go sit in the corner and close my eyes while I did it, because if I couldn't see anyone else then they obviously couldn't see me!

 

[Lachesis00]

Oh my Im dying here!!

 

[icebrat001]

My dad was a teacher, which led to a couple of my childish misconceptions

First, I thought *everyone* got summers off. It was a real shock when I found out my friends' parents had to work the whole year!

When I started first grade, I was very excited, but at the end of the week I announced to my mother that I was not going back. She was shocked as I had a nice teacher and liked school. She asked me why. I replied, "I've been going there for a whole week and they haven't paid me yet!"

I always wanted an ant farm, and since Mom wouldn't buy me one, I tried to catch my own ants and put them in a jar. Needless to say, this wasn't very successful. One day mom spilled some sugar on the kitchen counter and was careful to wipe up every bit. She said sugar would make ants. Well, this was the wrong thing to say to a little kid who wanted an ant farm I promptly took spoonfuls of sugar and dumped them behind all the doors in the house, and waited for the ants to come! Mom wasn't too impressed...

Finally, when I was maybe 4 or 5, my mom sometimes wore a wig. We were backing up from my grandparents' driveway and my dad hit a tree stump. (they'd had a tree cut down and the stump hadn't been pulled up yet and it was too short for dad to see - but tall enough to hit the back of the car) We all jerked backwards and mom's wig fell off into the floorboard in front of me. I started screaming hysterically, as I thought her HEAD had fallen off!

This thread is hilarious!

Laurie

 

[WebmasterMaryJo]

I thought cats were female and dogs were male.

I thought that the people in tv series could tell if I turned the channel, so I would watch a show even if I didn't want to anymore so I wouldn't hurt their feelings. I also used to turn the channel from one show to another to give them "equal time."

When I was really little, I thought everyone existed in MY world, and when I wasn't there they would just sleep. I remember the first time I realized that others had their own lives, and life didn't revolve around me (I think I was 5).

There was an attraction at Disneyland called Adventures Through Inner Space where you would go through a microscope. Well there was a giant microscope that showed the moving omnimovers on them with people. I was convinced that people actually shrunk, and used to watch them get on & go through the microscope trying to match them up with the little figures through the glass pane.

I thought Park & Ride (for you commuters out there) meant that you would park your car and there were actual rides there (I wasn't THAT young). I remember my mom telling me, "You're kidding right." (then the lightbulb turned on in my mind)

I thought Hobo Kelly could see me when she put on her big glasses.

I was sure the drawbridge in Long Beach would open up & we would fall in the channel, so I would hide on the car floor

I also thought that my stuffed animals had feelings, so I would line them up on my bed, letting them have the pillow, and I would sleep on the edge, making sure not to knock them off.

 

[2cutekids]

I was another child who thought that their stuffed animals could "think & feel". When we would go to church on Sunday mornings I would line them up and had one of them in front facing the rest so he could "preach" to them while we were gone. I had also heard a scary story at a bunking party about a killer stuffed teddy bear. Needless to say, from then on teddy bears were no longer welcome in my room.....especially at bed time! And I definitely did not turn my back on them!!!!!
Also, we had a pet beagle when I was really little. My aunt accidentally ran over him and he died. A couple years later, a rather big dog (obviously, not a beagle) roamed around our neighborhood. He had some of the same markings/spots as our beloved "Blackie" so I was convinced that he had found his way back to us......I guess from doggie heaven. (Don't know how I explained the difference in size unless I thought he never stopped growing.) I was so upset when my parents didn't believe me and wouldn't help me catch him!!! I guess his real owners appreciated that.

 

[dis ms.]

Okay, these are a couple gems from my nephew:

Once, when he was about 5 or so, he saw the neighbor's dogs getting, um, romantic. My sister had to explain to him about the dogs being "stuck together". Some time later, he saw a couple making out on television and said, "Those people are STUCKING!"

My sister used to be a huge Michael Bolton fan and she loved his song, "How Can We Be Lovers (If We Can't Be Friends)". There's a line in the chorus that asks, "How can we make love if we can't make amends?" One day my nephew (I think he was about 4) started singing all soulfully, "how can we make love if we can't make a MESS!"


He's 19 now, but he still hasn't lived down either of those. Hopefully, he has a better understanding of the birds and the bees!