Childish Misconceptions

[MsLeFever]

Great thread! I'm trying to think of something to add!

Not quite as funny but I asked my son when he was 3 if I still loved him when I was angry with him. He says "Of course not Mama!". oof - felt like a punch in the stomach. I made sure he knew differently!

 

[Kermit]

I thought that when men sat on the potty, they still lifted the lid. I knew the biology behind it all and that men did do some of their pottying standing up, but I thought that it was a "girl's potty" when the lid was lowered and a "boy's potty" when it was raised. I thought the point was so that girls didn't get boy germs when they sat on the potty. I was repulsed when my mom told me that guys sat on the same surface I sat on.

 

[kidshop]

I remember being little and going to church and thinking the big square light in the ceiling was God! I couldn't see anything but adult behinds, so that must be where the voice was coming from! I guess that is where the speaker was!

 

[Mrs.D]

I believed that if I ate a watermelon seed, then a watermelon would actually grow in my stomach.

I was told by some joking adult, that if you ate apple seeds, an apple tree would grow in your stomach. My mom had to do some fast talking when I accidentally swallowed one and became hysterical.

I also believed the dogs talked to each other in English when we humans weren't around.

I believed that when all the geese got where they were going, they would make real words, not just "Y" or "V."

 

[DisneyPhD]

I remember thinking that if "white people got darker after sun bathing, (tan) then people with dark skin should get lighter." Don't ask me why.

I also thought the whole "youth in Asia" thing, but I was in High School and could't figure out what they were debating about. Did I mention I was a cheerleader in HS? (But I was never blond.)

 

[D L and K's Mom]

This is so dumb....but growing up I always thought that if you were bad and didn't go to church (Strict Italian Catholic Family) that you would get leprosy (Spelling?) and your arms would fall off.....I just remember hearing so much about the lepers .I was so scared!!!!!!! I also thought that the Priests were people who had gotten this illness because they had not gone to Church and that their arms were somehow stuck to their bodies with tape and that is why they had to wear robes with long flowing sleeves....I thought they had to be Priests so they could go to Church ALOT and then one day their arms would stay on by themselves if they went to Chuch enough. I know this is so silly but I can't tell you how SCARED I ws that someday I would be walking and my arm would fall off . I am now a Catholic School teacher and I am pleased to say.....This is FALSE!!!! hee hee. WHEW!!!!! What a relief.


I also thought Fig Newtons had ground up worms in them for filling (I think my brother told me that).

I also remember being scared to look at the sun or the moon for fear I would go blind. I think this came from watching the eclipse through a pin hole in school when I was in Kindergarten and told not to look or you could go blind.

 

[MidNite]

*nudge*


I need more laughs!

 

[jackskellingtonsgirl]

When I was little I used to think if I shouted into the part of the TV where the sound came out that the people in the studio could hear me. So if I didn't like what was on maybe they would do something more interesting.

BUT it is pretty amazing that I got close enough to the TV to shout into it because my mother always used to tell me not to get too close to the TV because IT MIGHT EXPLODE! Anyone remember a problem with TV's spontaneously exploding in the 1970's?

I was absolutely flabbergasted when my mother told me that the cat had all of the same internal organs as a human, only smaller. I knew she had a heart because I could hear it in there, but I never imagined she had all that other stuff, too!

 

[disneyaggie]

Oh my stars. These are hilarious! Here are some of my doozies . . .

When I was in grade school, my younger sister was home sick with a cold. I thought I would be nice and surprise her with an ice cream on a stick that I bought at lunch and put in my lunch box. Imagine my surprise, and everyone elses' when I got home that afternoon (hours later) and found a wrapper swimming in chocolate goo.

And, during that same time, I remember my Dad, a successful community and Church leader, was also faithful usher at Church. Every Sunday he would take up collection with the other ushers. I remember sitting on my bed just sobbing my eyes out after Church one day. My Mom came in my room and asked why I was crying. I told her, "I don't like it when Daddy does the collection for Church". She asked me why and I said, "It looks like he's begging"!

I then got a loving talk about how we are blessed and able to tithe, and the Church depends on ushers to take up a collection from those who also are able to do so. So everytime since then, I think of that funny day whenever they pass the plate during the offering.

 

[Yardbird]

When I was about 6 or so we went on a vacation to the mountains in Tennessee. While driving up a mountain I asked my Dad about the fog surrounding the mountains. He said "it's mountain dew." I then asked "how do you think they get it in the bottles?"

 

[rayelias]

For years, when I was young, I was so upset at my dad's boss. Sometimes when he would call from work and I wanted to talk on and on, he would politely tell me that he was "all tied up at work", and couldn't talk. I had visions of my dad, sitting in his office chair, wrapped tightly in rope!

How dare that guy "tie up" my dad!

 

[delilah]

When I was preschool aged, I thought that all your blood was in your body the way that water was in a vase, so that you could bleed to death from even the smallest cut. I remember being hysterical because, to me, even the smallest injury was a potential medical emergency. My mom didn't really understand the urgency, but, usually got me a bandaid, because that would quiet me.

My cousin, who was 8 years older than I was, told me about the monsters in the toilet. I sort of got in trouble at school because of it, because, I was terrified to flush the toilet. It took a while for the teacher and my mom to desensitize me, and, I think I was still afraid of the monster for a while.

 

[transparant]

When I was little I used to think that the car wax called "Turtle Wax" was made from crushed turtle shells. I would get very upset when I saw my father using it! LOL!

My own kids used to believe that a Cathedral near us was Cinderella's castle when they were little. My dh and I would drive by it and say "look guys...there's Cinderella's castle!"

 

[TiggerLove101]

Once when I was little, I watched an episode of "Are You Afraid of the Dark" with a vampire in it. After that, I was terrified. I used to think that vampires were running down the hallway outside my door when I wasn't looking.

I also thought that TV shows would wait for me if I had to leave in the middle of it.

When my brother was little, he tended to have trouble hearing lyrics correctly.
In the song "Jingle Bells," he thought the reindeers were making "Spirit Sprite" instead of "making spirits bright."
In elementary school, we would have little concerts for the parents. One song was about Abraham Lincoln. The real lyrics go "He was the son of a poor but honest man." He heard, "Son of a poor butt, honest man."

 

[MidNite]

In elementary school, we would have little concerts for the parents. One song was about Abraham Lincoln. The real lyrics go "He was the son of a poor but honest man." He heard, "Son of a poor butt, honest man."

ROFL

 

[kdibattista]

When I was little, I used to think that if I just drank water out of a cup that it was still clean. Every time I drank water, I would just put the cup back in the cabinet.

 

[Sian]

I used to think that you had to have your birthday on the same day to be married (because my parents were born on the same day, just different years) So when my friends told me it was their Dad's birthday I was telling them "well it's your Mom's too" they told me no it wasn't their Mom's birthday, so I informed them that their parents weren't married then becuase to be married you HAD to be born on the same day. Boy did that start a big fight! QUOTE]

On similar lines, my little friend thought everybody's parents were teachers because hers were, and all the other jobs were what teachers did in their spare time.

When I was around age 6 most kids went home from school for the lunchtime break. I felt very sorry for those who stayed at school because I thought it was because their mothers didn't love them (I had never heard of working moms).
At a slightly younger age we used to sing the song 'What a friend I have in Jesus' in school assembly. I thought I was the luckiest girl in the world because I had two friends, Jesus and next-door Stuart. I had somehow failed to notice that other kids had friends too.

 

[tink2020]

 

[Blueeyes101817]

i get picked on ALL the time about this one..

i had seen on the news about people getting shot...so i thought that if someone would shoot me, the quilt would "catch" the bullet so i wouldnt get hurt---I had the quilt on me every night, even in the middle of summer hahaha

another one was that when i wasy ounger, i had to listen to the radio to fall asleep--I didnt realize that the DJs had shifts and would leave a certain time, so when they said something like "okay im out of here soon guys" on the radio, i would think the radio would shut down so i would force myself to sleep..

 

[Blueeyes101817]

o i thought of another one---
my older cousin told me monsters were under my bed--so i would take a running start then leap onto my bed to get in...in the morning, i would jump out of bed...

yeah, i was gullible!