Childfree (by choice) Disney Lovers!

[Bunless]

You know, I learned something today (cue cheesy 70's TV music...)
I posted a thread on the community boards, "Parents, stop giving in to picky eaters!" because it really is a subject I'm interested in and care about. And I got FA-LAMED by parents who think that I'm lecturing THEM and THEIR kids and asked me how I had any right to 'lecture' them, because I don't have kids of my own.

Now, in retrospect, my post was a bit argumentative. But parents take things SO personally. And so many of them seem to have so many challenges with their kids, which solidifies my 'better them than us' stance on child rearing. I have learned my lesson: DON'T MESS WITH PARENTS on a chat board.

Here's my original post:
"I've seen so many parents post questions on these boards like, 'my two year old only eats pancakes and cheese pizza, where can we find these at Disney?'
(Excuse me while I hoist myself on this soapbox...)
Parents who give in to their kids' 'picky' food habits are doing their kids an incredible disservice. Healthy eating habits are formed in the first few years of life, and when kids are only given 'kids foods' like fried chicken fingers and pizza, guess how they'll continue to eat as they age?
I'm sure many parents will come back at me saying, 'but my Johnny won't eat any vegetables, and I don't want him to STARVE'! Guess what, Johnny won't starve. He'll eat what you give him. And when he's older, he'll thank you for loving him enough to set standards for his well-being. You are the parent. Do your job, stay in control."

Can I get some love from my fellow 'Childfree by Choice' friends?

ITA you go girl for being brave and going on the community thread. They won't starve, self preservation will kick in before it gets that bad.

hi! never posted here before. but OH MY GOD!!! LoL i thought there was something wrong with me. i always think, "seriosuly, who's the child here?" i had to eat what my parents gave me or I didn't eat. Yes, who is the child? Be stronger than they are, you've got age and experience on your side.
i mean really? your kid can't eat anything but chicken nuggets and pizza? come on now! ugh! i get so upset when i read those. LoL

now you got me on a roll. and what's with the, "my kid can't have dinner with us unless he brings his nintendo ds. is that ok?" hehe i had to listen to ALL of my parents boring conversations. WHAT? seriously? not unless he brings his nintendo? You know what, yeah, as kids we had to sit through boring dinners with adults, BUT IT'S PART OF GROWING UP. Once again, you are an adult, your child is not, be the stronger party.

ITA- the child will NOT starve. Once their tummies rumble they will not mind the food that is on the table.

As a kid- I remember just sitting at the table and eating what my mother made us! She never made 3 different meals. I can't imagine! We would feel her wrath if it was even suggested

You have 2 options- EAT IT- OR DON'T! And they are the only options you will get. Case closed.

BTW- It seems you can't "breathe" anymore on the Dis or you will get flamed! And I can bet most members ARE parents.........hey, you might be onto something!

How long until a mouth-breathing breeder pops on here and tells us all to Shut It?

 

[HockeyKat]

Congrats!!!!

Can one EVER have too many DVC points! You just have to take more trips is all!

Hehe thanks! This contract came loaded, so we have 150 pts available for use by 8/31, and get another 300 on 9/1.

How long until a mouth-breathing breeder pops on here and tells us all to Shut It?

 

[lizandjason]

BTW- It seems you can't "breathe" anymore on the Dis or you will get flamed! And I can bet most members ARE parents.........hey, you might be onto something!

ETA- ^%$#!!!! just got jumped on by a few TGMers on his site. GEEZ!! They were probably parents b/c they were b!tc#ing about how crowded July is and that is the only time they can take their vacations- oh well....... Not me.

Ahhh...relief...other people who understand. This thread is the cool pool of reason that I am jumping into as I run flaming from the nasty parents.

 

[lizandjason]

ITA you go girl for being brave and going on the community thread. They won't starve, self preservation will kick in before it gets that bad.

How long until a mouth-breathing breeder pops on here and tells us all to Shut It?

AWESOME! Thank God for this thread! I've found my home. You guys rock.

And to answer your question...any minute now. Flame suits ON, people!

 

[Bunless]

And to answer the question before it comes...

Breeder does not equal someone who has had a child.
A breeder is someone who has had a child and refuses to be a parent.

 

[maddhatir]

How long until a mouth-breathing breeder pops on here and tells us all to Shut It?

Then we calmly refer to that post as "Exhibit A"

Ahhh...relief...other people who understand. This thread is the cool pool of reason that I am jumping into as I run flaming from the nasty parents.

Actually, we do have a few moms here on the thread- they are MY friends so that means they are cool! Seems like most of the moms I know are cool chicks. I wouldn't have it any other way, and why would you want to?

And to answer the question before it comes...

Breeder does not equal someone who has had a child.
A breeder is someone who has had a child and refuses to be a parent.

I did not know the definition of that. Is that directly from Websters?
Seems like a lot of parents get bent out of shape over that word. But ya know what? Just b/c we comment on "parents" it certainly does not mean ALL parents. There are some that just make you feel the NEED to vent.

 

[lizandjason]

Then we calmly refer to that post as "Exhibit A"



Actually, we do have a few moms here on the thread- they are MY friends so that means they are cool! Seems like most of the moms I know are cool chicks. I wouldn't have it any other way, and why would you want to?



I did not know the definition of that. Is that directly from Websters?
Seems like a lot of parents get bent out of shape over that word. But ya know what? Just b/c we comment on "parents" it certainly does not mean ALL parents. There are some that just make you feel the NEED to vent.

Of course. Most parents I love, my own included...I wouldn't be here if it weren't for them, after all! The good thing is, for all the moms that got defensive on that thread, there were three times as many who were just great and shared their personal stories... and I now understand a bit more about the topic.

 

[Bunless]

I did not know the definition of that. Is that directly from Websters?

Umm, of course. Do you think I just make up definitions at will? Puh-leeze.

Seems like a lot of parents get bent out of shape over that word. But ya know what? Just b/c we comment on "parents" it certainly does not mean ALL parents. There are some that just make you feel the NEED to vent.

No, it doesn't mean all parents. One of the reasons that we have chosen to not have children is that we're not confident in ourselves to not be 'breeders'. Raising a kid is no joke, and, frankly, I don't want to give up enough of my life in order to make sure that I raise that kid as well as I can. I see how hard it is, especially with the young ones. But, I also see the rewards when they get older, from the parents who, from the beginning have put their foot down (not just about food, but everything) and demanded respect from their children. Those kids, when they're teenagers, I don't worry about them. I do, however, worry about the ones who I've seen, from the time they're children, get what ever they want.

I also get the joy of being the chosen provider of discipline to kids. And, believe me, you know the ones who parents already provide it at home and the ones who don't.

 

[Shyvioletisme]

ETA- ^%$#!!!! just got jumped on by a few TGMers on his site. GEEZ!! They were probably parents b/c they were b!tc#ing about how crowded July is and that is the only time they can take their vacations- oh well....... Not me.

well whatever do you mean? I mean arent' they just going to take little Susie and Johnny out of school for a week or two in the middle of the school year for their vacation? I mean it's important...who needs that week of school anyway?

ETA: I mean I do understand wanting to take vactions at less busy times of the year(ie during school times), but growing up, no one at our school was ever taken out to go on vacation. you just sucked it up and went during christmas or summer break...

 

[fairygirl]

Thanks for the welcome! I am glad to see traffic pick up on here again!

We are planning a 2-3 day WDW trip for mid-October then we will head to the beach for the rest of the week. One day will be dedicated to MK and one to Epcot, of course. I am SUPER excited b/c we will be there during F&W Festival with NO CHILDREN TO WORRY ABOUT! FUN!

The whole fam (this will include 2 children that do not belong to me, sis and bro in law and the parental inlaws...and DH of course) is planning a week long trip to WDW for the first week of December 2011! We have just started our trip planning parties (just had an UP themed party last weekend) and we will be doing a pre-trippy later on...IM EXCITED!

I do have one question for everyone - has anyone ever taken their pets and used the kennels at Disney World? We are thinking of taking our fur child on the family trip. Thougths???

 

[Alesia]

You know, I learned something today (cue cheesy 70's TV music...)
I posted a thread on the community boards, "Parents, stop giving in to picky eaters!" because it really is a subject I'm interested in and care about. And I got FA-LAMED by parents who think that I'm lecturing THEM and THEIR kids and asked me how I had any right to 'lecture' them, because I don't have kids of my own.

Now, in retrospect, my post was a bit argumentative. But parents take things SO personally. And so many of them seem to have so many challenges with their kids, which solidifies my 'better them than us' stance on child rearing. I have learned my lesson: DON'T MESS WITH PARENTS on a chat board.

Here's my original post:
"I've seen so many parents post questions on these boards like, 'my two year old only eats pancakes and cheese pizza, where can we find these at Disney?'
(Excuse me while I hoist myself on this soapbox...)
Parents who give in to their kids' 'picky' food habits are doing their kids an incredible disservice. Healthy eating habits are formed in the first few years of life, and when kids are only given 'kids foods' like fried chicken fingers and pizza, guess how they'll continue to eat as they age?
I'm sure many parents will come back at me saying, 'but my Johnny won't eat any vegetables, and I don't want him to STARVE'! Guess what, Johnny won't starve. He'll eat what you give him. And when he's older, he'll thank you for loving him enough to set standards for his well-being. You are the parent. Do your job, stay in control."

Can I get some love from my fellow 'Childfree by Choice' friends?

Something I have learned in my years working with other people's kids is that you can't tell a parent how to parent. Trust me, I completely understand the urge, but I don't even try. It doesn't do any good.

I do have to say though, as a parent, that it's completely impossible not to take a criticism of your parenting skills personally. I don't think its possible for someone without kids to understand how completely a parent loves their child. I don't mean that in a condescending way, it's just a fact. The bond between a parent and child isn't like any other kind of bond. No matter how much you may love your spouse, or your pet, or even your own mother, it's nothing compared to the all-consuming love you feel for your child. To have someone else tell you that you're failing as a parent is the most hurtful thing I can imagine, even if it's true. Especially if it's true.

 

[tinkerdorabelle]

Alesia,

I had to comment on how cute ur pic is.

 

[tinkerdorabelle]

I just was endlessly questioned about not having children by a woman who had her 5th and was back to work at the beauty parlor after 4 days and was doing my hair. She had her live in boyfriend who was not working, who was 15 yrs younger babysitting bc she can't stand being home with the baby even after just a couple days. I get a lot of grief from people that we don't have kids, especially women. It still bothers me. I don't have to explain why to people, but feel like I always have to. I did help my bro raise his 2 when his wife left, so we always felt like we did. Those kids are now college age. On the same note, I wanted to scream at her parenting skills bc she was raving about how she cannot stand being home with the baby, and would have a baby by this man, but would never marry him bc "he doesn't work enough." On a happy note, we LOVE Disney and love going there by ourselves. We've gone at times with my niece and nephew and other family, but we love going by ourselves , it is really awesome.

 

[zima-cheryl]

I'm back.... did ya'll miss me?

Sorry - life just has gotten a little ahead of me & I'm just now starting to catch my breath. It has been quite a ride these past 3 weeks!!

Welcome to all the new folks!! Glad to see so many new faces.

I did skim through & just a few random brain droppings...


Bunnless -- the Tequila Bar is fantastic!! Don't miss it. I can't wait to go back & wish we had allowed ourselves more time for it. The balloon ride is nice & something to do once. I wouldn't go out of my way to go to DTD for it, but if you are already there it is worth doing.

ITA w/what everyone said about picky eaters. To this day my one brother eats nothing but the "beigh menu". Almost 40 and he eats like a 4 year old. I don't even want to know what his blood pressure & cholesterol must be.
When we were growing up there was always bread/jelly & apple sauce on the table. You didn't like what was being served you could have a sandwich. That was it...no fuss, no muss.

Gray & rainy here today. Guess that is good -- keeps me in the house & packing. Closing date here is 5/26. Now we just need to find a place there to put our stuff!

 

[maddhatir]

I just was endlessly questioned about not having children by a woman who had her 5th and was back to work at the beauty parlor after 4 days and was doing my hair. She had her live in boyfriend who was not working, who was 15 yrs younger babysitting bc she can't stand being home with the baby even after just a couple days.

Wait- and SHE is questioning YOU about why you don't have kids? Hmmm- you should have told her "boy, you make it sound so much fun- I think I will go home right now and try to make one".

I'm back.... did ya'll miss me?

Welcome back! I saw your comment on Facebook about DH sitting by the pool today

ITA w/what everyone said about picky eaters. To this day my one brother eats nothing but the "beigh menu". Almost 40 and he eats like a 4 year old. I don't even want to know what his blood pressure & cholesterol must be.

I have a cousin like that. She is 45 and she will only eat, Pizza, grilled cheese, fries and soft pretzels. It is such a treat to have lunch with her when we are out shopping- NOT! I love to have a nice sit down meal- not a slice @ some pizza place. A few months back, me, my cousin and a friend of mine went out for a nice day shopping and lunch. My cousin had to order off the CHILD's menu! So, the waiter thought it was only fitting if he brought her a coloring page and some crayons to go with it

 

[Alesia]

Alesia,

I had to comment on how cute ur pic is.

Thanks!

 

[babyrich]

I totally agree. We were served balanced meals every night, and my parents made us eat whatever they were eating, and if we didn't want it, we didn't eat. They also taught us TABLE MANNERS (which are about the way of the dodo by now). No hats at the table, napkin on lap, use your utensils, wait to eat until everyone is served, wait to leave the table until everyone is done eating, and no tv. We were surely NOT "starved".

On a completely different note, our DVC contract passed!! We now have more points than we need.

I remember going some nights without dinner because I didnt eat what was made. We were also taught manners. My sister made a hamburger for my nephew every day for almost 2 years. He screamed and cried and threw things if it was even suggested he eat what was being prepared. I told her that I couldnt believe how she gives into him all the time and she told be it was better than arguing with him! I said, arguing??? are you serious??? you are the parent, there should be no argument. She said the same thing I hear a lot, "you dont understand cause you dont have kids" Ok, I dont have any kids; but I was one and I remember going without or getting "the look" if I argued.

Parents nowadays seem to allow their children to do things that our parents wouldnt dare let us do or get away with.

Frankly, I dont mind if the kid plays the Nintendo DS at the table. I am not eating with the kid; but when it seems like the parent wasnt given a choice, that irks me. Another thing, we did not dine out very often when I was growing up; but I know when we did, I had to sit at the table until we were done. I was not allowed to run around and disturb the other patrons. The other night, my DH and I went out and some child around 4 years old, came over to our table and sat with us. We smiled and expected a parent to be close behind. Nope, mom and dad seemed like they were going to let her sit there with us. Her parents smiled and laughed, I smiled and said, it doesnt look like she is going to go back on her own. They got the message. phew... off soapbox... thanx.

 

[zima-cheryl]

Iand I remember going without or getting "the look" if I argued.

I remember getting "the look" too.
Heck - I'm 40 years old & still dread getting "the look" from my Mom.

The other was the middle name.... Boy o Boy - if she came out w/the middle name you just knew you were in for it! Don't even bother, just go right in the house & up to your room... 'cause a grounding was coming for sure!

 

[Kennywife]

I will tell you that at least in my experience, I had to eat differently than the rest of my family. I have severe food allergies. If I come into contact with something with onions, I will have a seizure. It's happened before. In public. Other things cause me to break out into a painful rash which causes me to scratch till I bleed.

My mom found it out the hard way when she kept sneaking ingredients into my food thinking she could get me to eat new things.....and I ended up in the ER.

So, just wanted to give an opposing viewpoint. Sometimes kids don't eat certain things because they can't tolerate them.

Anna

 

[maddhatir]

She said the same thing I hear a lot, "you dont understand cause you dont have kids" Ok, I dont have any kids; but I was one and I remember going without or getting "the look" if I argued. Parents nowadays seem to allow their children to do things that our parents wouldnt dare let us do or get away with.

Exactly! When was it that everything changed? It seems that over time, the child has become the parent. Why do parents let this happen- our parents didn't put up with it, why should anyone today have to? I don't understand.

Any parent can get pissed all they want that I said this- but really, it is blatantly obvious that things have changed.

AND, I HAVE to add, I am not talking about the parents that have kids with good eating habits- blah blah

Another thing, we did not dine out very often when I was growing up; but I know when we did, I had to sit at the table until we were done. I was not allowed to run around and disturb the other patrons.

OMG I remember as a child eating out and hearing those dreaded words- "mom and dad want coffee after dinner"!!!! I remember sitting at the table thinking NOOOOOOOOOO!!! I want to get out of here. No coffee PLEASE

The other night, my DH and I went out and some child around 4 years old, came over to our table and sat with us. We smiled and expected a parent to be close behind. Nope, mom and dad seemed like they were going to let her sit there with us. Her parents smiled and laughed, I smiled and said, it doesnt look like she is going to go back on her own. They got the message. phew... off soapbox... thanx.

Yikes- that is uncomfortable. DH and I went out last week and we were sitting in a booth- of course, the child behind us had to see what we were doing and kept popping his head over the top of the booth. Thank goodness the father made the child sit down- people don't understand that we do not feel like entertaining their child while we are eating.

So, just wanted to give an opposing viewpoint. Sometimes kids don't eat certain things because they can't tolerate them.

Anna

I think most people are talking about when a child throws a tantrum if he/she does not get his burger or chicken nuggets (OR just plain refuses to eat what is cooked for him) If he is not used to eating that type of food b/c of an allergy I doubt he would throw a tantrum until he got it.