Childbirth - Epidural or No?

[mjkacmom]

Plan on it. I actually went in planning on it, but decided to wait until I was desperate. FYI - if they only have one guy there who can give it, and he's held up in a c/s, you are out of luck. I started with demerol - nothing like being in the worst pain of my life, and confused! I was induced, so the pain was incredible. By the time I got it, it was time to push.

With #2, I knew better. I was already dilated to 3 when I was induced, so they broke my water, started the pitocin, and did the epi - I felt not a single contraction! I even had them top it off before I would push - the only pain I felt with that delivery was the IV being inserted!

My experience has also been that once I get it, my labor speeds up, because I'm relaxed. And the longest I had to push for was 20 minutes, with my first. My third (almost 9 pounds, all head) was less than 5 minutes.

 

[clgwli]

Go with an open mind. This is true of all things with a baby IMO. Trying to make a detailed plan of anything is nice but I don't think I know anyone personally who had it go exactly as they had planned.

I have heard people say their labors were traumatic only because they had something happen that they didn't want. I went in hoping for all natural, but being open to anything including a c-section. While my labor wasn't ideal for medical reasons, it wasn't anything I still am upset about.

 

[barkley]

both of my labors were over 24 hours each, and both started with fairly strong contractions 5 minutes apart. despite the contractions starting in 5 minute intervals i was'nt progressing with dialation so i had to have pitocin which initialy just made those 5 minute apart contractions much stronger, then shortened the time between them and made them even stronger.

the nurse/midwife i had for our first child, and the doctor i had for our second (nurse/midwife had broken her leg the week before ds was born) were concerned that if i continued contracting for hours on end i'de exhaust myself long before the deliveries so i was given epidurals.

with the first child it was WONDERFUL-and allowed me to gain some much needed rest. with ds it only ended up taking on one side which did give me the unique perspective of knowing exactly how effective the epidural was on the other side but at least it releaved some of the pain.

my attutude is that noone should be in excessive pain for hours on end-and since a woman does need strength to do the final stages of delivery it serves no purpose to subject her body to pain that could exhaust it to the point where she won't have that necessary strength.

 

[hrh_disney_queen]

My water broke in the middle of the night, and it didn't hurt at all until they induced labor and OMG...nothing like it. I thought I had a high tolerance for pain, I don't get novacaine when I go to the dentist, I have had a tooth drilled down for a crown without it. I'm kinda crazy, but back then I hated novacaine! Anyway, I definitely needed the epidural and begged for it. It took the anesthesiologist awhile to get there and after he put it in I told him I loved him! Sweet relief.

I did have labor with my second, and demanded epidural as soon as we entered the hospital. IMO, there is no reason in the world to suffer through that kind of pain, none at all. No trophy or reward if you don't get one.

What gets me is when women wear their non epidural births like some kind of badge of honor. I even had some friends' DHs tell me not to have an epidural, that I could do it myself without it. OK, the next time you have a baby pop out of your bottom, you can make that decision for yourself, dude.

 

[golfgal]

Wow, I guess I know the wrong women (or would that be the right women)?

Oh, and I do consider myself lucky that birthing children is fast for me (I think I even said something to that effect earlier in the thread). I would not call the incredibly intense pain of going from 1cm to 10 AND giving birth (to kids who were 8lbs 8 oz and the 8 lbs--so not huge but not tiny) with no meds whatsoever in just over an hour easy. I briefly blacked out from the intesity of the pain the second time around (and I have a pretty high pain threshhold) and I am sure the entire hospital heard me screaming. I cannot imagine the pain and exhaustion that must accompnay many really long labours. I am sure it is really terrible. I don't think you could compare the two. I guess I consider all of us moms who, in the end, are healthy ourselves and have healthy little ones to love to be equally lucky.

I think you will find that the women you know would have a different opinion if you told them you had an epidural.

My sister told me once that she is the only 'real" woman in the family because she didn't have to have a C-Section. Um, ok, whatever.

 

[kaseyC]

I was very afraid of needles so I just knew there would be no epidural for me when I was pregnant with my eldest DD. I went into labor on Jan. 23, 1996 and she was not born until Jan. 25, 1996. I was in labor for 32 hours. We tried all of the crap we learned in birthing class. By about hr20, I was begging to for an epidural. The needle could've been the size of a turkey baster, I didn't care. I just wanted some relief, I was in pain and exhausted. My DH swears I was speaking in tongues. (I think it was probably all of my curse words slurred together).LOL After that, it was smooth sailing.

For my younger two DDs, I was asking for an epidural as soon as I walked into the birthing center.

 

[mickeyboat]

I had one with and one without.

My first labor was induced at 34 weeks and my contractions were miserable and not accomplishing much. I asked for an epidural for hours before they would give it to me, and it was blessed relief once I got it. It did wear off and I needed another dose. I also had trouble pushing, but I think that was more because my body just wasn't ready to labor and deliver at that point.

I knew that I wanted an epidural with my second, but she came so quickly that there wasn't time for one. I was fully dialated and ready to push when I arrived at the hospital. My labor and delivery was intense and painful, but quick.

I think you need to think about what you want for your labor and delivery, but keep an open mind in case things don't work out as planned.

Congratulations and good luck!

 

[ReneeA]

I didn't plan on it for the first - but it ended up being a long labor and he was over 10 pounds. I got the epidural, dialated 5 cm in the hour after I got it and then it took me almost 2 hours to push his big head out.

The second one? I'm a huge procrasinator so I didn't have a bag packed for the hospital even though I was 3 days overdue. My water broke at home. I figured I had lots of time to get everything done and get DS to family. By the time they got me into a room at the hospital, I was iin transition and an 8 - no epidural for me. Good thing she was only 7 1/2 pounds and it only took 1 or 2 good pushes because I WANTED an epidural at that point.

 

[NHdisneylover]

I think you will find that the women you know would have a different opinion if you told them you had an epidural.

My sister told me once that she is the only 'real" woman in the family because she didn't have to have a C-Section. Um, ok, whatever.

maybe, but usually I am in a group when birth stories are going around and there are always women who did have epis and those who did not. I have never witnessed such behaviour.
Your sister sounds like a real peach! Generally people like that have plenty of other high and mighty attitudes too. Try not to let her get to you
As far as I am concerned the measure of a mother is in how she raises the child, not in how she births it (gosh, I know some great adoptive and step mothers for that matter).

OP--I hope you do not have any family or friends who will give you a hard time about however you choose to haev your baby (or however circumstances force those decisions). If you do, just KNOW that a healthy mom and baby are the only real goals and focus on your little one instead of any negativity.

 

[RadioNate]

I picked to go in with an open mind.

I too had one with and one without.

The without was not by choice, the epidural didn't work and DD came fast, less than 4 hours after 1 first thought I might be in labor. With her it wasn't real clear and she was my 2nd child! I felt icky but no real regular contractions, just a continuous ache and serious nausea. I was at 6cm when I got to the hospital. That was 2 hours before she was born.

I had the epidural with DS, that labor was very typical.

My recovery time without the epidural was much less. I bounced back really quickly and felt really good within an hour or so. With the epidural, it took more than 5 hours to get be back up walking again and then I had a hard time with nausea and dizziness.

If I had a number 3, I would choose to go without the epidural unless I absolutely needed it. I think I could do another short labor without it.

 

[Darsa]

Personally I never really considered it; my mom did it 4 times without, my gram 5 times, so I would have had to have been DYYYING to actually admit to needing it. But, if someone feels that they can't continue without it I'm sure it would make sense to request it.

That being said, my kid was only 6lbs 6.5 oz, my water broke at exactly 6 AM and she was delivered at 11:17 AM. THAT is the reason why I didn't have any more; I was afraid I'd pay for the "easy" first with the second!

 

[Gabes_mommy]

As far as I am concerned the measure of a mother is in how she raises the child, not in how she births it (gosh, I know some great adoptive and step mothers for that matter).

Absolutely!

I say be prepared to have one (I had to see the anethesiologist and sign a waiver ahead of time) and then play it by ear. You never know how your body is going to respond until you are there in the moment.

 

[NMAmy]

Oops! Apparently I struck a nerve (no pun intended) by using the words "bragging rights". Let me clarify...I did not intend to say that I thought that woman would endure the pain just for the bragging rights. I just meant that after they would have bragging rights. Just a secondary perk, so to speak. Sorry if it came over differently.

I've never really thought about it as a perk, secondary or otherwise. I think you'll find a lot of strong feelings on both sides--mainly because, for some reason, some women try to make others who made a different choice feel badly about that choice so we tend to get a bit defensive.

As you can see just from this thread, some folks seem to feel that those who don't get the epidural are martyrs who feel that their experience makes them better mothers in some way. And some who skipped the epidural like to make those that got one feel as though they cheated somehow and didn't get the full experience.

My point is that everyone has their own reasons for choosing as they did. And much like the great WOHM/SAHM and the breastfeeding debates, trying to justify your own choices by running down someone else is just rude. What works for one person won't work for another, and that's okay.

And, yes, I'm a big coward who is more afraid of enormous needles than childbirth pain.

OP--just make a plan on your own personal preferences and realize that you may need to change your plan at the last minute. And get used to that because it happens a lot when you're a mom--you have one plan and your kid just blows it all to heck at the last minute!

 

[punkin]

Go in with an open mind.

child #1 (9 pounds 10 0z) no epidural....

Child #2 (7 pounds 15 oz) Epidural......... I had back labor with him and I took the epidural. Great Decision!

Every labor is different!

Bingo! Go in with an open mind and do what makes sense for you at the time.

 

[Mickey Fliers]

Definitely go in with an open mind!

Baby #1: Induced at 38 weeks b/c doc thought he was "too big". Got the Epi. I couldn't feel anything. They had to tell me when to push. I didn't feel like I was really involved. Long story short, they vacuumed out after 15 min. of pushing b/c doc had a c-section to get to. Very, very bad for me...baby fine. 7 lb. 14 oz.

Baby #2: Went into labor on due date. Got the hospital at 8:30 am...Navy hospital that supposedly didn't "give" Epi's. Anyway, it went so fast that I was 8 cm by the time check-in was complete. No Epi, but did have pain meds for the last 2 cm. Pushed for an hour and half. Baby had shoulder dystocia (sp?)...8 lb. 10 oz.

Baby #3: Induced at 39 weeks. Got the Epi at arrival. It was wonderful for the labor but was "turned off" for the delivery. Definitely felt a part of the process. Pushed for 30 min. 9 lb. 3 oz.

Baby #4: Delivered at the hospital with a mid-wife. First thing the mid-wife asked was whether or not I wanted meds. I told her that I was going to try my best but I wasn't looking to be a hero. She said that she would help me every way she knew how. Just when I thought "I can't do this anymore" my baby was born. Literally, the best of the 4 experiences. 8 lb. 1 oz.

I think the Epi can be wonderful. For me, my labor and recovery was much, much easier this last time. First time I didn't vomit immediately after delivery. Was able to get up and walk around right away. Go in telling yourself that you can do anything...

 

[luvmy3]

Sorry but I have to disagree--I know PLENTY of women that don't get meds during labor just for that reason and then they make a point to tell everyone that "caved in" during labor that they didn't have a "real birth experience". Give me a break.

I know a couple women like this too.


I voted, go in with an open mind. I have had three babies and had an epidural with the first two. I would have had one for the third but my labor was progressing way to fast and I missed the window of opportunity. It actually wasn't as bad without it as I had thought, but it was my easiest, less painful labor of the three.
I would just have it in your plan and take it from there.
Congrats by the way

 

[PrincessParty]

I had 1 child each way and I have to say I felt better after the natural delivery, but it depends on how long you are in labor for.

 

[pansmermaidzlagoon]

I also did not like the idea of the needle in my spine and all that. I had read about it and some of the possible effects. I decided I would rather have the pain of childbirth.

back labor and all, I made it through.

I think knowledge is the best thing - knowing exactly what is happening and knowing the pain is part of the process helps. Also, having coping mechanisms helps - the breathing, etc. Time seemed to go so slow and it seemed to take forever. I just kept telling myself it would be over soon, I would have my DD, and the rest would all be a memory! When it was over, the midwife told me I had a high tolerance for pain, but I think much of it was that I prepared myself to handle it.Labor was hard, but pushing wasn't that bad for me.

I went in with a birth plan (no epidural, no episiotomy, etc), but knew I could rely on the mid-wife to respect my wishes, but also advise me on when we should stray from the plan. Meconium in the fluid meant I had to transfer to a hospital from the free standing birthing center. Luckily, everything else went well and I was able to follow my initial wishes. The midwife even brought in an OB who was good at getting the shoulders out, so I could avoid the episiotomy. Turned out she wasn't needed. You have to stay flexible.



everyone is different. You have to decide what is best for you!

 

[ElizK]

Frankly, the idea of someone putting that enormous needle into my back freaked me out way more than childbirth pain. I didn't skip an epidural for bragging rights or because I was trying to be superwoman or because I thought I'd get a special no epidural prize. But I'd read about possible side effects and seen the procedure done to someone else and there was no way that that needle was coming anywhere near me.

I have no issues with other people getting an epidural, but for me, the idea of the procedure was way worse than the pain it was supposed to relieve.

This was me, too. I was very fortunate to have short labors, and I do have a very high threshhold for pain, so that helped, too. Labor for DD17 was 12 hrs, pushed for 10 mins (!). Labor for DD14 was 10 hrs, pushed for 10 mins. I would have taken th epidural, even though it really scared me, if the pain had gotten unmanageable, but it never did.

ETA: both babies were 6 1/2 lbs! That probably helped, too.

 

[ogreenlee]

i have one child and was induced. i was over my due date, and my OB was moving to Florida just a few days after my induction date.

i went in the night before knowing full well that i would have the epidural. NO DOUBT IN MY MIND. that night... the woman in the next room, obviously without the epidural, gave birth. i had just taken an ambien and was heading off into lala land. the next thing I hear is this very loud and scary devil-noise coming from the next room. this low-bellied, deep "OOOOOOH MYYYYYYY GODDDDDDDDDDDD" over and over. this went on for two hours.

well... needless to say, i never went to sleep that night, and neither did my husband. when the doc came in to see how far i was dialated the next morning, she couldn't even get in there because i had clamped shut. they had to give me my epidural just to examine me. that was at 10am. i never felt the first contraction, and i have never once regretted that. i don't think it makes me less of a mom or any of that other crap some women like to say. i was watching oprah and the nurses came in, turned off the tv and started getting everything ready. i asked what was up and they said, "you're ready to go." HUH? I pushed for 20 minutes and out came wonder.

Can't beat that birth story with a stick, in my opinion.