Celebrating Our Adoption

[rcymrcym]

My nine year old daughter and I will be celebrating our adoption during our trip in December. Although I am sure there are lots of families who do this, I can't seem to find a string about it.

So my questions are:

We aren't going for another few months. When should I tell her we are going to go?

Disney has birthday buttons, do they have them for adoptions?

What else has your family done (or seen done) that would make this special for us?

How can we make the most of celebrating our time together (its been a year of foster care before the adoption became final.) In other words, good mommy and daughter time can be had by _______.

How can we take the most advantage of the Christmas ambiance that will be at the parks to make our time the memories that will last a lifetime.

And, last but not least, I am a single mom on a budget. Cost saving tips? (I'm checking out the budget boards too.)

Thank you for everything!

 

[mikamah]

Congratulations to you and your new daughter!!!!! How exciting.

I'm a single mom too, and took my son last dec for his 5th birthday. I told him when we booked in january, and about 6 months before we started taking monthly pics and doing a countdown. like this.

And a month before we made a calendar for the month with mickey heads and a piece of chocolate for each day. He got into the countdown as much as I did. I don't know how old your daughter is, but think the anticipation is half the fun.

They did have birthday buttons, but I'm not sure about adoption, but I know they had My first trip buttons, and there might have been a generic celebration type button. We got buttons at the hotel when we checked in.

We stayed in the value resort and ate mostly counter service, but did a couple character meals which were great. We did the crystal palace for my son's birthday and they make a big deal of it, and Tigger brought him out his cake. You could tell them when you got there you were celebrating and they will bring you out a cupcake and sing to you. They are so good there I'm sure you could surprise her with a special dinner and dessert one day.

Cost savings for us were more counter service meals. We brought breakfast bars and poptarts for breakfast and would grab some fruit at the food court on our way to the bus. Plus we brought our own water bottles, we had got some with filters reccommended on the budget board to filter out the bad taste.

The christmas decoration are up everywhere and beautiful. We went to Mickey's Christmas party, but if money is tight, it is not worth it. The Osborne lights at MGM were amazing to just sit and watch and listen to the music. IT is a magical place. I'm a little camera crazy and would reccommend taking lots of pics to preserve those awesome memories you and your daughter will make. Have fun.

 

[design_mom]

I don't have any suggestions that immediately spring to mind, although it might help to know how old you DD is...

But I wanted to say congratulations on your adoption. We just celebrated 2 years with DD and we're quickly approaching 6 years with DS. Ice cream is our adoption anniversary tradition -- so we'd probably pick someplace to get some really insanely good ice cream sundaes. (There's a really good place at the Yacht and Beach Club.)

 

[momtoamulan]

How old is your dd?

If she is old enough, tell her and then count down the days (that is what we did with our four year old dd).

As for celebrating, I don't know if they have pins for adoptions...with our dd anniversary, we kept it low key (our other travelmates celebrated with us with a lunch).

I am not sure if I would want an adoption pin on my dd, but that is probably just me.

Congrats again, and have a wonderful trip.

 

[Princess Roo]

CONGRATULATIONS!!!! I would love to foster-to-adopt an elementary-school aged child in the future

I don't know about the pins, but maybe you could make a custom screen-print T-shirt about it? They are really cheap to make - especially if you print on white shirts - and there are some talented designers here on the DISigns board (toward bottom of the list) that do custom designs for free!

I agree that a big savings is to pack breakfast and snack food with you. Getting a counter service value meal + an extra sandwich and sharing a large soda. Bringing a water bottle into the park and those individual drink mixes to mask the flavor of the FL water (they have mixes for Kool Aid, iced tea, lemonade, etc. at the grocery store).

 

[Michigan]

Congratulations on your adoption day. Last Sunday 9/9 was my oldest daughters 17th adoption day. She will be 18 in January.

My youngest's adoption day is 12/17 and her's will be 9 years.

 

[livndisney]

No, Disney does not have adoption pins (But I have mentioned it to them SEVERAL times ) I would love for them to have a pin that says something like "Happy Family day". They do have anniversary pins but that is about it so far.
I don't think the CM's "get it". I have mentioned to them when were celebrating an adoption anniversay and mostly they look at you blankly.

Congrats on your adoption celebration! We have had celebrated several adoption milestones at Disney.

 

[LadyShea]

Congrats on becoming a family!

You could have some matching t-shirts made, as a previous poster mentioned, with a personalized message on it like "Our family created 12-X-2007" or even inviting people to "Ask us about our family, created through adoption" or whatever works for you. Zazzle.com has an unbelievable choice in Disney T-shirts that you can buy online for a reasonable price, and then you can have it personalized locally...or do it yourself with iron on transfers printed from your computer or fabric pens/paint.

I have seen many mother-daughter costumes for sale while looking for Halloween...Princesses, Minnie Mouse, etc. you could go all out and dress up

When you make your dining reservations for the special day, tell the CM on the phone exactly what you're celebrating...they make notes. I am not sure what, if anything the restaurant will do for us in about 2 weeks, but we are celebrating the 5 year anniversary of a kidney transplant for our dear family friend while we are there, and the CM noted it on the reservation.

I am not sure how pricey it is, but maybe you can both get your hair done at BBB or the barber shop that does glitter hairdos as a special treat.

Shop together at WDW for a very special Christmas ornament for your tree so you can remember the trip every year when you decorate at home.


I can't wait to here what your plans are, please keep us posted. The court delayed our finalization for so long (over a year), it wasn't very special...more like a chore that needed doing...and it was within two weeks of his birthday, so we don't plan to celebrate it, but I love to hear about others' celebrations.

 

[livndisney]

Congrats on becoming a family!

You could have some matching t-shirts made, as a previous poster mentioned, with a personalized message on it like "Our family created 12-X-2007" or even inviting people to "Ask us about our family, created through adoption" or whatever works for you. Zazzle.com has an unbelievable choice in Disney T-shirts that you can buy online for a reasonable price, and then you can have it personalized locally...or do it yourself with iron on transfers printed from your computer or fabric pens/paint.

I have seen many mother-daughter costumes for sale while looking for Halloween...Princesses, Minnie Mouse, etc. you could go all out and dress up

I am not sure how pricey it is, but maybe you can both get your hair done at BBB or the barber shop that does glitter hairdos as a special treat.

Shop together at WDW for a very special Christmas ornament for your tree so you can remember the trip every year when you decorate at home.

The barbershop charges $5.00 for glitter and hair gel. Your 9 year old may enjoy this. It stays in ALL day.

My DD and I have worn matching outfits. Right now I am sewing her a watermelon dress and ironing on a glitter watermelon on a tee for me. I already had the tee and the iron on was under 2.00 from Joanns (Walmart has iron on too). Cost effective and cute!

I Love to see all the families created by adoption. LOVE to see them enjoying Disney together. I have passed several in the parks and we just share a "knowing" smile. I have met and spoken with many adoptive familes in Disney. Does anyone else think we should have an "Adoption" Board in the families section of the Dis?

 

[Mouse House Mama]

How about making matching t-shirts that say "God Bless the day we found each other" and then the date of adoption?

Congrats!

 

[MrsJ Henry]

Congratulations!!!!!!
We also made our family through adoption! We adopted our angel from Guatemala.

1. Maybe you could make a pin. The craft stores have all sorts of stuff now to do it. Maybe even see if she wanted to make the pin.

2. I would tell her maybe a month before you go. (but I know I would never be able to wait that long LOL

3. I would tell EVERYONE that you are celebrating the adoption. Tell the resort and the restuarants... there will be special things happening along the way.

4. When are you going in Dec.? I have a cousin who works on Main st. part time. She works some in Dec. I could see if we could set something special(surprise up or something)

Congratuilations again!!!!!! how wonderful!!!

 

[crisi]

Your daughter is old enough to make some decisions about this.

My son HATES to have his adoptive status singled out. He's really sensative to it. Family day would be a huge mistake - we've been asked not to celebrate his "arrival day." He is Korean, so its relatively obvious he isn't my bio kid - but he finds any stranger questions (or even family discussions) invasive and inappropriate. For him, the interracial family thing is bad enough - he LOOKS different, and why does everyone need to know WHY. And inviting strangers to ask questions is going to have you losing control over what kind of questions they ask - "why didn't your real mom want you." "Your new mom must be really special to adopt you" (implying that the child is damaged and only a special person would want her). People say the stupidest things to kids. They don't think at all (and the kids DO think). And they think they are entitled to know the most intimate information "aren't you awfully old to be adopted?, I bet you were abused."

Be careful about how you choose to disclose this. You can't make your daughter unhear something cruel or stupid.

On the special things - if she isn't "too cool" a Princess meal. If she is "too cool" a fancy dinner at one of the nicer restaurants. Matching outfits is a great idea (and doesn't single out the adoption thing). Cirque is a fantastic show. (All of this is a little on the pricey side though - matching outfits can be done cheaply). Have other guests take lots of mother daughter photos - nearly everyone at Disney will gladly snap your picture for you - when you get back, make a scrapbook.

 

[LadyShea]

Good points on the privacy issues Crisi. DS is only 20 months and we have a very open adoption and good relationships with his first family, so I don't think of all the possible negative comments that can be made.

 

[crisi]

We've been really lucky - we haven't gotten a lot of the stupidity. But my son is a relatively private person (he is nine) and for him, fitting in is more important than standing out. And I'm tied into the adoption community enough to know about the stupidity.

(One stupid comment we got was at Disney. We were on the bus. Someone said "cute kid, is he adopted?" He was little - three - he came home at six months. We said "yes." They said "I bet its really hard to talk to him." We said "no harder than any toddler, why." "Well, he wouldn't speak English because he's obviously not American.")

I have friends with adopted kids and there is information I know about the adoption because WE have an adopted kid that they shared during the process that I really wish I didn't know now that their kids are getting older. Its intensely private information and its the KIDS information, not the parents.

 

[mommytobug]

Adoptive and very proud of it Mommy here too!! I agree with the privacy issues. My dd is 9 and proudly announces it to all who will listen........so every kid is different. I have been very proud of the way she answers really STUPID questions from people. I would go to the adoption forums and look at thier shop. There is a precious necklace that is 9.95. Present her with that and then make it a mommy/daughter trip instead of the whole focus being the adoption. Disney is magical even without a button!!

 

[rcymrcym]

Thank you all for all these great ideas.

I love the t-shirt idea! There is a craft store nearby, and although I am not crafty, I can iron!

I thought maybe St. Nicholas could leave her a note from Mickey or Cinderella on December 6, which is about 2 weeks before our trip. Is this too late to tell her?

We have a reservation for the Princess Dinner in Norway. My daughter is still into dressing up as a different princess every Saturday. She wishes she could wear her princess dresses to school every day. Cinderella's castle was all booked up, but I read about the opening of the BB Boutique. Any thoughts from folks who have tried it there?

Also I splurged, and bought MVMCP tickets. Suggestions on how to best use that time? And not get super sugared up on CC cookies?

I am so happy to read about all the other adoption on here! My daughter was in foster care for so long, (and most of her siblings still are) that the memories of her childhood have been very negative in the past. I am just trying to cram in as many good things that bond us, and clear out that life is a negative and bad thing and adults can't be trusted. I am hoping this trip goes a long way on the "Mom is the one who makes my dreams come true."

Please keep the stories coming! And the ideas. They are much appreciated.

Peace,
Molly

 

[MrsJ Henry]

How wonderful that you want to start helping her to create new happy and magical memories.
I've been working with teens for 19 years now and many of them are in the foster care system. It's nice to see there are people out there that can see past "oooo that would be too hard" and bring their hearts to a child that needs a forever family. You are both very lucky to have found each other .

Yes there will be "stupid comments" that people will make and there will be "insensitive comments" people will make, and we have received these also BUT... we have also received great ones and have had the most wonderful conversations with people adopting or have adopted or just good hearted people who are willing to educate themselves a little more about it.
But people do that with everything and I think it is all in how you teach your child to handle the situations and how they see you handle the situations.

Celebrate being a family that's what it is all about!!!
We say in our family that... blood doesn't make a family... Love does!

 

[Mouse House Mama]

Don't let the stupid comments from stupid people get you down. We have been blessed with 4 children. We love them with every breath of our life but we still get the obnoxious comments. (they are all close in age) Here's a sample:

Village Idiot- 4 KIDS!!!! God Bless you! You are crazy!!!!

My response- Yes God did bless us. I love every single minute of it. I am so lucky!

Village Idiot- Were they planned?

My response- Sure were! We're not 16. We get how the whole baby making process works.


These are just a few. So you see- idiots are everywhere and it makes me so mad that anyone would suggest for even a second that we didn't want our kids. We wanted them with all our heart. Just like all of you wanted your children with all your heart. People would even tell my children directly "your Mom is crazy!" Yeah- real nice to tell a kid under 5, or any kid for that matter. If you want to celebrate the amazing day that you found each other then don't let the idiots get you down. Those people will be idiots no matter what the occassion is. JMHO.

 

[Mom2JPL]

I just wanted to say congratulations on your "forever family"! Our oldest was adopted from China (she's almost 4 now...where'd the time go!?!). And this is our first family vacation since our family is now complete. Can't wait!

Hope you and your daughter have a wonderful tip and make memories that last a lifetime ~ best wishes to you!

 

[3littleHalls]

I just wanted to say CONGRATULATIONS on your Forever Family!!! That is awesome that you have each other!! For us, the build up pre-trip is part of the excitement. We make a paper chain and write the things that we are most looking forward to for the trip and then tear one off at bedtime. We also make our autograph books(out of my scrapbooking stuff) and we plan our trip together. I would also maybe make a button or order one. T-shirts are also a great idea. Or just matching outfits, we got lots of attention in the parks last year when our family had our zazzle shirts. I am sure you will have a magical time!!!