Cam's New Lease on Life Journal (comments welcome!)

[keenercam]

Thanks, Tracy. Your words are very comforting. We got word at 3:30 a.m. that my FIL passed away. I am so joyful that he is no longer suffering but incredibly sad that the world has lost a truly wonderful man.

I had hoped to get to journals this week, but have been trying to get everything under control at work and home since we'll be away for the funeral.

For all my WISH friends who have been so supportive, I really appreciate you. As my signature says, I am truly blessed.

I'll be back to journaling and visiting journals next week.

 

[toystoryduo]

Cam,

You and your family are in our thoughts and prayers. May God comfort you and give you His strength and His perfect peace at this difficult time.

 

[Blueeyes101817]

Cam,

You and your family are in our thoughts and prayers. May God comfort you and give you His strength and His perfect peace at this difficult time.

Tracy said what I wanted to tell you, so I will just quote her... to you and your family...i will keep you guys in my prayers

 

[CJK]

I'm so sorry to hear about your FIL. I'll continue to keep your family in my prayers. I'm so glad to hear you were able to see FIL before he died. I hope you find comfort in the wonderful memories. Do take care of yourself. We're all thinking about you.

 

[CACruisin']

Cam, so sorry to hear about your FIL. As CJK said, I am glad you were able to see him one last time. Take care.

 

[toystoryduo]

Hi Cam,

Hope you're doing well, sweetie. You and your family have been in my thoughts and prayers.

Take good care of you!

 

[Blueeyes101817]

Cam, just wanted to check in and say hello
hope you are doing okay

 

[CACruisin']

Cam, I know this is a hard time for you now. This Thanksgiving, remember all the good times you had with your FIL and try and laugh with the happy memories. Take care.

 

[toystoryduo]

Cam,

Have a Happy Thanksgiving! May the memories of your loved ones bless your heart and mind this Thanksgiving Day.

Sending our love from Ohio!

 

[Blueeyes101817]

Hi Cam-
Wanted to say hope you are having a great weekend!

 

[keenercam]

Wow, it has been so long since I posted here. Thank you to all of my dear WISH friends who kept my journal on page 1. At least I knew where to find it.

I haven't done great food-wise the past couple of weeks, but training for the Marathon is right on track. I think that doing 20 miles this past Saturday on the treadmill and then doing a 5K that night for Special Olympics created that "entitlement" attitude in me regarding eating and I have been totally splurging.

I do have to get back on track. I leave for Orlando in 31 days. Every pound I lose is one less I have to carry 26.2 miles. I just have to keep reminding myself of that. The stress of entertaining plus the holiday rush and stress about DD18 and DH's final exams are driving me nuts.

I have also been experiencing some minor health issues, including the reappearance of some cardiac arrhythmia and some shortness of breath. So, I've had a chest xray and a chest CT scan w/contrast, all sorts of blood work and a pulmonary function test. I am not expecting anything to show up in any of that and I am going for a pulmonary stress test later this month, which should also be fine. I guess the doctors just want to keep a really close eye on anything because of my history. I thank God for the great health I have enjoyed for nearly 2 years since my "miracle" on 1/6/05. And I am doing almost everything I can to keep myself very healthy. If I could just get my eating under control . . .

Food today:
B: coffee w/skim milk (not hungry after a pretzel binge last night)
L: 2 cut up small apples; core turkey chili

Heading out soon to a WW meeting and WI -- it won't be pretty!

Hoping that renewing my enthusiasm for this will yield a good result next week.

 

[keenercam]

As I feared, every bad thing I've eaten the past few weeks showed up on the scale last night. I was up 3 lbs!

Then, I went home and after eating a core dinner, started eating all the snack stuff I could find. Bad habit coming back. I have to get a handle on it immediately since I can already tell that I am starting to crave carbs again.

My firm party is tonight and the menu is surf & turf with lots of interesting accompaniments, so I am being very good today and allowing myself to enjoy that dinner tonight. Then it is back entirely to core in the hopes of a significant loss at next Tuesday's WI.

Today's food:
B: coffee w/skim milk; WW oatmeal
S: banana
L: diet coke chicken; green beans; sugar snap peas
D: surf & turf, etc.

My plan is to eat absolutely NOTHING after the party and to go home and start decorating with a huge glass of ice water at hand.

 

[AmyBeth68]

Cam!!! I'm so proud of you. Running 20 miles then a 5K. Sweetie...you are MY hero!!! WOW!!!!!!

And I know the scale can be discouraging...but with the exercising and things that you are doing for marathon training the scale will fluctuate a lot. I know that's little solace when you hope to see a different number there. But I just know how hard you are working and hate to see you discouraged. You are amazing girl!! Truly amazing .

I'm glad the doctors are taking good care of you and checking everything out. I'm also relieved that you believe nothing will show up. I know you feel so blessed for your health right now and it really reminds me that what I'm dealing with is so so so minor!!! You really are an inspiration .

 

[keenercam]

Thank you so much, Amy. You are really sweet and I appreciate your support. Knowing I get to come here and vent to my WISH buddies really takes a lot of the pressure off while still making me feel accountable, if that makes any sense.

Last night's dinner was absolutely wonderful: sherry crab bisque; field greens w/lemon vinegarette dressing, craisins & candied pecans; filet, scallops & shrimp in soy ginger sauce with potatoes, snow peas & carrots w/some wonderful terriyaki/soy sauce; chocolate roll w/champagne cream filling, whipped cream & a lady finger. Absolutely wonderful and decadent. I don't regret a bite.

Totally back on track today:
B: weight watchers core oatmeal; coffee w/skim milk
S: banana
L: small piece chicken breast in diet coke chicken sauce, green beans, sugar snap peas; green salad w/olives, cucumbers & onions w/a tiny bit of greek dressing (evoo and lemon & garlic & herbs)
D: kidney beans, corn & salsa mix; barley & veggie mix; taste of diet pepsi chicken; taste of baked center cut boneless pork chop

The plan is to go to the Y tonight and do 4 miles on the TM. Of course, I forgot my music and a book, so we'll see how it goes, but I definitely need to get back to putting in the steps during the week and not just the LRs, even though time is at a premium.

 

[keenercam]

I didn't get to the gym last night, because DH asked me to get DS to and from boy scouts. It gave me a chance to get some stuff taken care of, though -- work to home to pick up DS, take him to BS, go grocery shopping, back to BS, home to make DS dinner, and cooked tons of good foods for the fridge to help me stay on core. I made corn & kidney beans & salsa mix; diet pepsi chicken breast; boneless center cut pork chops.

I cooked pierogies and honey chicken nuggets for DS and avoiding them was a huge challenge. Not even a bite though, since I know how that snowballs for me. I also made mini ravioli for his lunch today and didn't touch them.

I woke up craving protein, so I microwaved 2 extra lean small ham steaks and diced them for finger food today.

Today's food plan:
B: coffee w/skim milk; diced ham
L: green salad w/chick peas, olives & fat free feta; more diced ham if still hungry
S: apple
D: kidney bean, corn & salsa mix w/extra lean pork chop; piece of diet pepsi chicken
S: apple; bean/corn/salsa mix

We are decorating the entire house tonight and I have to clean, so I am planning ahead what snacks I can have. I'll probably cut up some fruit and fat free cheese and I also have 94% FF popcorn if I need it.

 

[CJK]

Just reading about your dinner a couple days ago made me hungry!! Why is dinner still a couple hours away and I've finished my snack quota???

Sounds like you're right back on track with loading up on some good food choices. Good job on resisting those nuggets! They're such a weakness for me. Keep up the great work and have a great weekend!

 

[traceycooper]

Hi Cam
I have been reading your inspirational journal!
I hope your good health continues & that your recent tests are all ok
So sorry to here about your FIL
The food at your firms party sounded delish

 

[CACruisin']

Cam you are doing so well allowing yourself some indulgences and then getting right back on track with healthy eating. Very impressive!

Great job on the 20 miler. That is a big mental hurdle. The fact you did it on the treadmill is amazing. When I was training the changing scenery would keep me entertained on the long runs and the fact that I was miles from home (and the only way to get home was to keep going) would be all that kept me going sometimes. The times I had to do a treadmill workout I had a really hard time staying focused. I kept thinking about all sorts of reasons to get off the treadmill....

I'm glad to hear that docs are taking care of things. It really is very amazing that you are just weeks away from completing your marathon. That is a huge accomplishment for anyone, and even more phenomonal considering all you have been through. You should really be so very proud of yourself and your determination.

Have a great weekend and enjoy your taper down to marathon weekend!

 

[Blueeyes101817]

Hi Cam-
Its so nice to see you posting again! you are doing such a great job! i cant believe the marathon is sooo soon! i know you will do an amazing job!

Have a great weekend!

 

[keenercam]

Thank you so much, everyone. I am so grateful for the support here. I really think that I got off track the past several weeks because I had stopped posting, and of course, when you are off track, you don't want to post because you are embarassed about falling off the wagon. Well, I am back againn and really appreciate that you all took the time to post in my journal.

I did really well last night even when I was so tempted by the chips DS was eating and really, really wanted junk food. I satisfied my sweet tooth with a huge delicious apple and my carb craving with some bites of kidney beans, corn & salsa. I really have to keep a supply of that in the fridge. I swear it is something physiological that makes me crave carbs, and that seems to be a satisfying (core) fix. Barley is another fix that works. I just have to make the time to cook some.

Tomorrow is going to be difficult. We are entertaining and I am making lasagna for dinner. We will also have all sorts of cheese and crackers, chips, etc. My plan is to put together a core lasagna for me and put together a fruit platter and a veggie platter. I'll also see if they sell fat free cheese chunks. If I get through tomorrow completely on core I am going to be shocked.

Today's food:
B: egg beaters, coffee w/skim milk
S: chunk pineapple; diet lemonade iced tea