Cam's New Lease on Life Journal (comments welcome!)

[keenercam]

My first day back on plan went really well. I didn't use all my regular daily points and I didn't use any of my activity points for an hour of FIRM exercise. I ended up only having 65 oz of water for the day, which wasn't quite enough. I'll work on that today.
Overall, I am pleased.
Confession time -- I put 3.5 pounds on since 11/15. That is just ugly. It can take me a month or more to lose 3.5 pounds, but it only took me 2 weeks to gain it. UGH! Nothing I can do about it except move forward. I am not going to give up my clippie, though, in the hopes that in the next couple days I will be entitled to it again.

Today's food:
B: turkey burger split between 2 light english muffins (5)
(I was hungry--probably from working out last night)
S: 3 kavli thick & hearty crispbreads (1)
------------------------------------------------------------
update 1:00 -- up until now I've had 36 oz water
L: turkey burger & corn & salsa (4)
-----------------------------------------------------------
update 4:45 --
Well, I ate lunch at about 1:15 and by 4:15 I was out of control hungry. So I ate:
S: pretzels (3)

Then, at 4:30, when the chocolate covered nuts and the homemade fudge and the donuts and the cinnamon coffee cake and the candy on the kitchen table were calling my name so loudly that my stomache was answering back, I ate a couple more pretzels and a lite yogurt (2.5)

I've also had another 36 oz of water, bringing me to 72 oz total so far today.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Update 5:15 -- okay, now I feel really sick from everything I've eaten in the last hour and all the water I drank. UGH! Hope I get over this awful feeling before I leave to go to the gym or I'll end up not going.
------------------------------------------------------------------------

It is supposed to pour from mid-day on, so I probably won't get to walk outside tonight. I did bring my workout bag, and will plan to go to the Y for some treadmill time instead. I did something weird and painful to my big toe on my right foot, so I am walking around in stockings today. I was already dressed and running late so I couldn't change into pants to wear flats, so I have high-heels and just can't wear them. Actually, now that I think of it -- I do have my sneakers with me and may change into those. I hope I feel up to walking by tonight. If not, it will be some serious bike & elliptical time for me.

 

[eeyore25]

Hi Cam!!!!

You are doing a great job with everything!!!

Hope you are having a wonderful Tuesday! Keep it up

 

[Strings]

Cam you are my hero!

Way to go getting back on program. I am so impressed with you resisting the fudge. I am so proud of you. I am going to need some help getting back OP after WDW. Keep up the great work and the 3.5 will be long gone.

Tke care,
Beth`

 

[keenercam]

Thanks, Jamie! Thanks, Beth!

Last night I went to the gym and did 40 minutes bike, 30 minutes elliptical and 30 minutes treadmill -- I would never have dreamed a year ago that I'd ever do an hour of exercise. 1 hour and 40 minutes was actually enjoyable. It felt therapeutic! Of course, a snickers marathon bar ahead of time helped my energy level.

Yesterday finished out well, food-wise, though I did use many of my APs (the marathon bar is 5 pts!)

Today:
B: most of a bagel with thin spread cream cheese (4)
L: grilled chicken over a garden salad w/ff dressing (6)
S: goldfish crackers (1.5)
D: 2 shrimp skewers (2); broccoli (0); 1/2 c. rice (2); hamburger helper (14!)
S: 1/2 bag lite popcorn (1.5)

It's nearly 5 and I NEED junkfood! Off to find something. Water and a lite yogurt first. Then if I am still hungry, I'll do something else. All I really want to do is go home, after a really bad day in court.

Oh, and I finished the November exercise challenge with 1010/1000! Walking to and from court carrying a litigation bag (stuffed) and lugging boxes on a cart gave me my last 30 minutes.

 

[keenercam]

Well, last night was just terrible when I got home. I was so hungry, and even though I had DH cook some rice for me so that I then only had to warm up some shrimp skewers, there was hamburger helper cheeseburger macaroni on the stove and that is a huge weakness/trigger food for me. First, I was picking at it, all the time reminding myself of my point plan for the night. Then, even though I ate a huge plate of broccoli w/1/2 c. rice (2) and 2 shrimp skewers (2), all I could think about was that darned HH. So, I decided to "suck it up" -- literally -- in a more controlled fashion. I actually put the rest of it in a bowl and warmed it in the microwave and sat and ate it morsel by morsel with a teaspoon. It was incredibly satisfying and I had a hard time working up any guilt, even though I'd estimate that it was 14 points!

Now, I know I would have advised any of my WISH friends to either scrape the leftovers into the trash can or put it away in the fridge without eating any of it, but it was sooo hard to convince myself that I didn't want it. I thought of my new size 16 and 14w jeans and my cute little horizontal stiped "tommy" sweater, etc., etc. and still could not talk myself out of eating it all. I even tried to convince myself that a small amount would satisfy the craving. No go.

I ended up eating 33 points yesterday! And I only earned 2 APs! That is just ugly. Even though I know that is what flexpoints are for, I know I could have done better. I told Howard that he HAS to put the leftovers away after the kids' dinners, especially if I am getting home late. It is just a weakness for me that I will need his help on. He is very understanding and I know he'll help with that.

Today is going well so far, though I will need to strategize on how to deal with the rest of the day.
B: 1 lite EM w/reduced fat peanut butter (3); coffee w/cream (1); baked apple w/cinnamon & splenda (1)

Lunch will be a lean cuisine chicken in peanut sauce (one of my 2 personal favorites) (6) with lots of broccoli (0). I'll need to figure out when I am going to have lunch, because it is precisely when I'll be out my office for Andrew's academic awards assembly. I'll probably eat early.

I am going to do a powerbar before going to the gym tonight. I did a snickers marathon bar tuesday night before I went, and I was able to exercise for 100 minutes without feeling hungry or fatigued. I'm curious to see if the powerbar (chocolate, yum!) will be as effective. If I start to feel hungry, I will head for home and have Howard cook a WW meal for me to be ready when I get home.
-----------------------------------------------------------
Update at 3:00 pm
L (at 12:45): LC peanut chicken over broccoli (6)
S (at 2:45): fruit w/walnuts (3)

The fruit & walnuts wasn't planned, but was delicious. Hopefully, it will hold me until about 6:30 when I head to the gym with a powerbar in hand. May use sugar free hot chocolate or some hot tea to stave off any hunger or cravings later.


----------------------
Did a powerbar on the way to the gym (4), where I did 3.42 miles on the TM in 50 minutes -- a solid sub-15:00 pace (14:37). Convinced my performance was positively affected by the powerbar.
Came home and had WW santa fe rice & beans w/some corn stirred in (7). Still have a couple of points. May do turkey on wasa crisps or some pretzels with mustard. Remarkably, I am full right now, so maybe not.

 

[keenercam]

Finished up last night with pretzels & fat free pringles.
Overall a good day :

Even better yet, the scale was down 3 pounds this morning from Tuesday (which I thought was a little high anyway at the time) This puts me pretty much back where I was before Thanksgiving. Within striking distance of my immediate goal -- 9 pounds before the 1/2 marathon. 5 weeks from tomorrow!

Let's hope my body doesn't go back into that phase of not giving up any pounds when I am exercising a lot. I will be so frustrated! Just going to keep up with the training schedule and eat sensibly and hope to see continued progress.

Have to do 8 miles tomorrow and I am a bit intimidated. The most I have done to date is 7.2 so this isn't too much further, but I really want to try to maintain a good pace. I did a 15:27 pace for that 7.2. I hope I can do better than that tomorrow. I am going to do a good carb/protein mix for dinner and will do a powerbar in the morning. Also want to try honey packets for intermediate energy. If all goes well, I should be done in right around 2 hours. Huge time commitment! Then in to work for the day.

Not a whole lot planned for the weekend, as plans keep shifting. May be working at DD's school play tonight or tomorrow night. Working all day tomorrow and Sunday. Andy is doing a "practice run" on an admission exam for the high school he wants to go to. He'll take it for real next December, but this will give him a chance to see what it is like. Hoping to see "Rent" this weekend, too.

Really hoping all my WISH friends are doing well and that everyone has a great weekend.

 

[Mykelogan]

Hi Cam,

Sooo happy to read that you are doing so well! Congrats on the three pounds that is awesome! 5 weeks til the marathon?? Wow!!! Can't wait toi hear how it goes!!!

I saw Rent last week and absolutely loved it! hehe Of course! The cast recording has been playing in my iPod all week! Hope you get to see it soon!

even though I am not around much lately I am thinking about ya!! Keep up the great work!

Mike

 

[toystoryduo]

Oh Cam!

I am so excited for you! You are in marathon mode! You will do a great job with your 8 miles today I just know it! I can't wait to hear about you crossing that finish line at WDW! What a magical moment that will be! You know that all of your WISH buddies will be cheering you on! Go Cam!

Cam, I want to offer you my condolences on the loss of your second mom. Was this your MIL? What a difficult time that must have been for all of you. It sounds like your trip to Hilton Head was a blessing and exactly what your family needed.

I hope you have a wonderful weekend! I'll see you when I get back from WDW!

 

[keenercam]

Hi Cam,

Sooo happy to read that you are doing so well! Congrats on the three pounds that is awesome! 5 weeks til the marathon?? Wow!!! Can't wait toi hear how it goes!!!

I saw Rent last week and absolutely loved it! hehe Of course! The cast recording has been playing in my iPod all week! Hope you get to see it soon!

even though I am not around much lately I am thinking about ya!! Keep up the great work!

Mike

Thank you so much, Mike! I have been thinking about you and your trip so much! I am sooooo outrageously excited knowing how much more you are going to enjoy this trip because of how fit and healthy you are. I can't wait to hear about the trip.

I am a bit jealous of you having seen "Rent" already. I really thought I'd see it opening weekend. I love the song "Seasons of Love" and got to see the Broadway cast perform it at the hurricane relief benefit. It is soul-moving. Don't forget to take your ipod with you on the trip. It will be great for the airport, the flight, etc.

Have a great, great time!

 

[keenercam]

Oh Cam!

I am so excited for you! You are in marathon mode! You will do a great job with your 8 miles today I just know it! I can't wait to hear about you crossing that finish line at WDW! What a magical moment that will be! You know that all of your WISH buddies will be cheering you on! Go Cam!

Thanks, Tracy! I know that my WISH friends have brought me this far. When my enthusiasm and commitment was flagging, you (and others) have given me the courage and encouragement to keep going. I have often thought that you all are carrying me to the START line. Then, it is up to me to bring myself to the FINISH line. And I know you will be celebrating with me. Thank you so much, sweetie!

Cam, I want to offer you my condolences on the loss of your second mom. Was this your MIL? What a difficult time that must have been for all of you.

Thank you for asking, Tracy, and for your condolences. It is hard to describe who Karen was to the world. Her role in my life was so big that I can't begin to describe it. She and her DH (who died in January '03) were best friends with my parents before I was born. Her son Jason and I have always said we were best friends before I was born (he is older than me). When our parents lost touch, Jason and I were old enough to sustain a friendship; we became and remained inseparable,and to this day, he is my best friend in the world. His mom, Karen, was always one of my 2 biggest cheerleaders. She and my aunt gave me all the support and love and nurturing that I craved growing up. Her "motherly" love was unconditional and unflagging, regardless of what difficult phases I might have gone through. We had the mother-daughter relationship that we all wish we could have with our mothers. She was never jealous or resentful of my friendships or commitments, and celebrated every accomplishment with unquestioning joy. She was madly crazy about Howard from the time I told her I loved him. None of the nonsense that a big italian family brings to that kind of situation altered how she felt about me or my choice of future husband. As she got to know him, she loved Howard with the same generosity that she loved me. She adored Jenn and Andy.

All of my life she has told me she wished she were my mother. She made up for all the holes in my life. She was present at every significant event in my life from my christening on, no matter what else she had going on her life, and her love for me was constant, regardless of any family drama I had with my parents, and often despite them. It was difficult at times, because my mom was somewhat jealous of our relationship and I think she resented that Karen was always there "for me", rather than as my mom's friend. The hole is so huge, I can't begin to describe it.

Sorry if I went on and on. Sometimes it helps, you know? Anyway, thank you for asking.

Tracy -- I hope your trip to WDW brings your family all the good things that we found at HH -- peace, closeness, a chance to just "be a family" without all the noise of the real world. I hope the magic of "the world" washes over all of you and renews your spirits!

 

[Cruise04]

Good job on those 3 pounds lost Cam!!! You are such an incredible inspiration to me - even if you don't think you are. I can't even IMAGINE doing 7.2 miles in 15 minutes - that just bogs my mind. I am lucky if I can do 1.5 in 30 minutes!!!!!! And I have done the same thing - I would have never imagined a year ago - or even 6 months ago - that I would be where I am today. So I know how you were feeling!!!!

Again - all my to you!!!!!

Keep on
Chris

 

[keenercam]

Thank you so much, Chris! I really appreciate your support and I am so glad we can encourage each other!

Well, here is an excerpt from my post yesterday:

Have to do 8 miles tomorrow and I am a bit intimidated. The most I have done to date is 7.2 so this isn't too much further, but I really want to try to maintain a good pace. I did a 15:27 pace for that 7.2. I hope I can do better than that tomorrow. I am going to do a good carb/protein mix for dinner and will do a powerbar in the morning. Also want to try honey packets for intermediate energy. If all goes well, I should be done in right around 2 hours. Huge time commitment! Then in to work for the day.

My plan for dinner went a bit awry last night when I left work and met Howard and Andy at the movies to see "RENT" and ate too much popcorn. Was still hungry when I got home so I ate 2 lite hotdogs on lite english muffins. I think there was at least some amount of protein with all those carbs!

So, here is the cross-post from the training thread today:

After some careful consideration and a look at the weather channel (it was 27 without the windchill), I decided to do my 8 mile walk on the treadmill. Did 8.03 in 1:59:14 (14:51 pace). The good thing about the TM is that it is relentless and unforgiving and you can't slow down when there is a lapse in your attention span or when you are tired -- you actually have to consider whether to kick the speed down a notch, and I can usually talk myself out of doing that. The bad thing about the TM is that it is relentless and unforgiving and you can't slow down when there is a lapse in your attention span or when you are tired -- you actually have to consider whether to kick the speed down a notch, and I usually talk myself out of doing that. Yeah, as you can see, I am still a bit undecided as to whether that is a good thing or bad thing! After all, the plan called for 8 miles (the faster you do it, the sooner you are done. Now, if it had called for 2 hours, my attitude might have been a little more relaxed!

I did a powerbar a bit later than I wanted (1/2 while walking into the gym and then 1/4 at about 1/2 hour and another 1/4 at 1 hour) Also did "shots" of honey at 1:20 and 1:40. The powerbar definitely helped. Probably needed a second one since I hadn't done breakfast, but when all was said and done, I think I learned some stuff that works. I was voracious when I was finished and didn't wait to eat. Stopped at the first place I saw and got a bagel with ham and egg and cheese. Very satisfying. Still doing okay almost 4 hours later (at work) as far as hunger.

Developed "hot spots" on the inside of my foot back near the heel on both feet. I was wearing my new sneakers (same style, etc) but I think the socks were a bad choice and I won't use them again for a long session. I am having some soreness in my right hip, but I think it is the result of my gait. Not much to be done about it. Will take some aleve and see how it is in a couple of hours.

First of all, can't believe I was able to do 8 miles without killing myself and am THRILLED that my pace improved by more than 30 seconds a MINUTE over the 7.2 a few weeks ago.

ETA: was down another pound today, putting me at 59 total! Can't wait to get to 60 and beyond! Am feeling really bloated now, but I think it is due to all the water I have had and the foods I've eaten today. But I am wearing my size 16 (regular, not "W") jeans and I am excited about how comfy they are. Have to hope my body doesn't start holding on to pounds with the increased exercise.
Food today:
B (during workout): powerbar(4);honey packets (.5); 32 oz water
L (right after workout -- 10:15): ham & egg & cheese on bagel (12?); 1/2 large coffee w/cream (.5)

---------------------------------------
ETA: food for the rest of yesterday
L/S: tomato soup (2), corn (1), light string cheese (1), 4 slices kevli (1)
S: dream candy bar (2)
D: 2 morningstar boneless buffalo wings (1); eggbeaters w/ff cheese & salsa (1.5), 2 lite EMs (2)
Dessert: marshmallow treat

 

[frogmommy]

Hi Cam-

Congrats on making it through the 8 mile trial. I really admire what you are doing.

I'm so glad you and your family had time to relaz and regroup at HH. That's certainly the place for it.

I'm so sorry about your loss. You are in my thoughts.

 

[Blueeyes101817]

Cam-you are doing so great..i cant believe the marathon is in 5 weeks..i agree with tracy-were all going to be cheering you on! You will do great-i know it

 

[keenercam]

Thanks, Heather! What were you doing up so late? Are you a nightowl? Kind of hard with kids, right?

So, I am in so much pain today that I am seriously re-considering the plan at WDW for post-half marathon activity. I wasn't too bad off yesterday, so I think with some aleve that Saturday, I will be able to stick to the plan of hanging out with the WISHERs at the end of the race and then walking back to EPCOT through the International Gateway (should be good for my muscles to do that too). Nap, then 5:00 dinner at LeCellier. I love it there so I think I will be sufficiently motivated to get up and moving.

Not much planned for that Sunday. We can sort of take it easy in the morning, go to the Boardwalk Bakery for breakfast and watch the WISH marathoners as they come through the EPCOT resort area. May have to take it easy the rest of the day until the post-marathon celebration at Pleasure Island. It's good to at least consider this stuff ahead of time, so that I won't be regretful that weekend if I am not up to doing a lot.

 

[keenercam]

Food yesterday:
B: 2 lite EMs with lite turkey & ff cheese; coffee w/tiny bit of cream (5.5)
L: tomato cup of soup (2); 4 slices Kavli w/1 lite string cheese (2)
S: milky way caramel (mini); chocolate cherry kiss (2)
D: pot roast with veggies (10); crescent roll pieces (3)
S: 1/2 bag light popcorn (2); rice krispies treat (2)

Typical post-long workout day binge. Nothing too bad though.

 

[keenercam]

Got up at 6 this morning (thanks for encouraging me, Howard! ) and went to the Y for an hour on the bike with my awesome soundtrack of RENT on the ipod. Then in to work for a shower and off to a busy day.

Food:
B: pria bar (2); 2 lite EMs w/turkey burger (5); coffee w/cream (1)
L: apple (1); veggie cup of soup (1) with 1/2 c. rice (2); string cheese on melba toast (2); zero carb candy bar (2)
S: lite yogurt w/hi fiber cereal (2)

 

[eeyore25]

HI Cam!!!!

Great job on getting up and getting to the Y to work out. I need to start getting up earlier to work out again.


I hope all is well and you are wonderful!!!!

Keep up the good work and I hope you are having a wonderful evening!!!

 

[keenercam]

Wow. Can't believe it has been a week since I posted. Last week was just he**ish -- my Dad's birthday was Monday and I just started the week depressed and seemed to have moments of positive attitude while mostly being sad. It is such a rough time of year for us. Howard has been out of work for more than 6 months, it is our first Christmas without my parents, and now my DFIL's cancer is back and spread to his bones. All we can do at this point for him is pray for very effective pain medications.

I have been terrible about food on weekends and at night, so I shouldn't be surprised that the scale isn't moving. I caught a glimpse of the magic number yesterday -- 60 pounds total lost, but alas, after a day of treats for our guests and popcorn at the movies and chinese for dinner, the scale was back up today. Just downing lots of water and hoping to flush everything, including my bad attitude, out of my system.

I'm still right on track with training for the 1/2, though. I am trying very hard to stay focused and enthusiastic. I even did 6 miles on the TM on Saturday with what I thought could have been a broken foot. Fortunately, it was just bruised bones, not broken. Took it easy yesterday and today, and will see how it goes tonight for my 60 minutes on the TM.

Food today:
B: 2 lite english muffins; 1 turkey burger (5); coffee w/cream (1)
L: corn (1); turkey burger (3); canned diced tomatoes w/green chiles (0)
S: small scone (6)

DS12's boys choir did a holiday concert in the lobby of a downtown office building here, and I went to hear them perform. They were wonderful and it was a nice boost in the middle of the day. I think I need to surround myself with Christmas music and really try to focus on the meaning of the season. We are completely done Christmas shopping except for one gift certificate and a small item I want for Andy's stocking, and even the adopt-a-family gifts are done. That is a lot of pressure off us.

The plan for tonight (while DH is at a meeting) is to head to the Y by 7 pm (use an energy bar on the way), do 30 minutes on the bike and 60 minutes on the TM.

The most important part of my plan, though, is just to try to get through each day with a measure of control and get through the next 3 1/2 weeks with no injuries and good health.
------------------------------
update 9:20 pm -- Did an hour on the TM (4.09 miles -- 14:40 pace). Had a powerbar on the way (4)
D: eggbeaters w/sausage & ff cheese (5); pretzels & nuts (4); 2 hershey's miniatures (3); tortilla chips (2)

UGH!!! SO OVER!

 

[keenercam]

Today's food:
B: baked apple (cinnamon and sweet & low) (1)
yogurt w/granola & fruit (4); coffee w/creamer (1)

L: garden salad w/ff dressing (0); 2 hard boiled eggs (4)

S: pretzels (3)

D: corn (1); turkey meatballs (8); cookie (2); pretzels, nuts, chips (4)

Yep, I just keep blowing it. Being so hungry when I get home from the gym after 9 pm and eating munchie stuff -- craving salt. I am aware of the issues. Just have to commit to fixing them.