Buying Gifts for Spoiled Kids

[LuluLovesDisney]

Okay, I know that's a little harsh, but I hate buying gifts for my nephews. Two of them really have everything they could ever want. They spend about $100 a weekend easily. They go out to eat three or four times a week. They each have four ipods, including the brand new ones that just came out a few months ago. Neither does particularly well in school, or has any real interests outside of girls, sports, video games and electronics. I really got my feelings hurt last year when I picked out candy, specifically, well-thought-out books (I'm a teacher) for each and a $50 gift card and they peeled it all open and tossed it to the side with a dry "thanks". I work several jobs and had to go through a lot to earn that $150 for their gifts.

Does anyone else on a budget have to buy for a well-to-do family member and do you have any advice for me? I do love them and I really would like to watch them have a little excitement. Now, Christmas is really nothing special to them, because they get anything they want all year long and other than decorations, there's really no difference to them. I'd just like to buy something that they really enjoy, but maybe something *different*/more educational/less materialistic than the expensive trendy gifts they get every weekend. Is "nonmaterialistic gift" an anachronism or what!

Any ideas are appreciated!!

 

[famofsix]

I don't know how old they are but my nephew was excited about basketball tickets and a night out with his uncle for one of his gifts. He is not spoiled like your situation but the gift was a little unusual. I think maybe you are spending too much $ on the nephews especially if you feel unappreciated.
Do you need to buy for them?

 

[clh2]

Personally - Based on my budget for nieces/nephews, that is way to much anyway. Again - that is based on MY budget. I don't go over $30 per niece/nephew. (While I have a total of 15 nieces and nephews, we purchase gifts for 10.)

My only suggestion for the selection of GC's is to make sure that they are for a store they really like, i.e. Best Buy, a sporting goods store, etc. Also - unless you know that they REALLY want a particular book or like a particular author, I would just skip that part of the present. And, I realize you are a teacher and can make some great recommendations.

It is hard to feel the love, though, when their enthusiasm for the gift is just not there.


My opinion - if they do not appreciate the present, to scale it back somewhat.

 

[mandysbus]

Donate to a charity in their names....that way it won't matter if they don't like it, it will still be going to a good cause. Get them some reading material on the topic so they can read up on who or what they are helping. It would be something unique and probably somewhat attention getting.

Our town xmas tree outside at the square is decorated in pink this year in honor of breast cancer awareness. I thought that was a neat idea (though a little different). maybe you dont want to pick breast cancer for teenage boys but there are plenty of good causes.

Just a thought...

 

[disneyjunkie]

My nieces and nephew are spoiled(so is my son )

99% of the time I check with my sister before I buy her kids gifts. That way I get things that they want and don't already have.

How about getting your nephews Ipod GCs or GCs to their favorite clothing stores.

 

[ClarabelleCowFan]

After a couple of years of buying gift cards I couldn't afford for my 2 youngest teenage nephews and never receiving so much as a "thank you" from them I simply stopped buying them gifts. I work too hard for my money to spend it on ungrateful teens who have such a sense of entitlement.

There is no law that says you HAVE to buy them gifts. It is obvious that these kids are impossible to please so don't waste your money or energy on them. If you feel that you must do something then donate an amount to a charity in their name as a PP suggested. There is a charity where you can buy a cow, goat or farm equipment for the poor in a 3rd world country. Get them a GOAT!

 

[mrsbornkuntry]

Since your nephews already have alot of things that they don't appreciate maybe they would appreciate time more. Is there an activity that they like to do you could share with them, like movie tickets for a day out or go-karts? I'm sure my nephew doesn't remember the gifts that I've gotten him, but he does remember baking cookies with me when he was 4 and other activities we've done and places we've gone.

 

[lbgraves]

Donate to a charity in their names....that way it won't matter if they don't like it, it will still be going to a good cause. Get them some reading material on the topic so they can read up on who or what they are helping. It would be something unique and probably somewhat attention getting.

That was the first thing I thought of. Spend the money on someone who will appreciate the gift.

 

[Madsofa]

Donate to a charity in their names....that way it won't matter if they don't like it, it will still be going to a good cause. Get them some reading material on the topic so they can read up on who or what they are helping. It would be something unique and probably somewhat attention getting.


Just a thought...

This was the first thing I thought of as well. Donate to Big Brothers and explain where their gift money went. How old are the boys? You could spend a day volunteering with them as well, this way they might appreciate the gift more, and if not well you're not any further behind and someone who needed the money now has access to it.

 

[macfamily]

Donate to a charity in their names

Yep, my first thought too. I worked for a non-profit agency that provided therapy for children with autism and the spectrum disorders; I think that a charity would DEFINITELY benefit more from the money than your nephews would with their 16th iPod or 25th pair of Heely's

Although thinking more about it, would it offend the parents? I unfortunately know many people who would be mortally offended by the thought of such an intangible gift for their precious babies...

 

[Deesknee]

I have a few niece/nephews that are....difficult to buy for. They as teens are better off financially they I could ever hope to be. When we used to buy for them (when they were under 18) we were told to just get them gc's for gas or fast food restaurants. That doesn't sound like the best idea for you though. I agree charity is a great idea (may even put a bug in their ears), but maybe a home made photo album of your sibling (their parent) thru childhood right up to present.
Best of luck and remember it is the spirit of giving. Your heart is in the right place.

 

[PrincessMommy2]

I think it's great that you want to give your nephews an "unmaterialistic" type of present, but from what you wrote, I think it would be a losing battle. Do your nephews' parents realize how poorly they act when they receive gifts? I would be mortified if one of my kids acted so ungrateful. We deal with a similar situation w/my SILs three boys, but if you met her it would not be surprising why they act as they do. We only get an invite to her house if it's one of the nephews birthdays. Nephews barely acknowledge you and have to be told to say thank you (12, 10, 8 should not have to be reminded) I mailed a $25 gift card to her oldest when we could not make the party - never got a call to say thank you. My SIL has even gone so far as to ask me to return a gift and get something else for one of her kid's birthday gifts - after he opened it! That cinched it for me...granted these are not expensive gifts, but we work too hard for our money to feel obligated to give a gift to a child that does not appreciate it. And honestly...you cannot blame the child if this is the example that is set for him. It does make it hard to like them, though. DH will never say anything to his sister, so when the last birthday came around, we had other plans. And I did not send a gift.

I think you're a great aunt putting so much thought into their gifts, I wish they appreciated it. I don't think I would spend so much money on nephews who don't appreciate it. I'd have to agree with gift cards for them - and not $50 either. The most I would do is $20 each. I do like the idea of buying them a goat! I actually got that catalog the other day.

 

[Briarmom]

Get them a GOAT!

We are doing that sometime soon. I am NOT going to the slaughter, though. Let me know if you want me to buy you a goat.

 

[clarabelle]

Have you considered the Heifer project? You can buy a goat or something in these kids names to be given to a poor family in an undeveloped country.
www.heifer.org
I am sure you could get plenty of literature to go along with it

 

[iNTeNSeBLue98]

Make a family gift. Last year I made a "snowed in" basket. I filled a tub with popcorn, hot chocolate, marshmallows, a DVD, a fleece blanket, etc. I spent about $20-30.

 

[floridafam]

I would be tempted not to buy them anything.

If you do buy something, maybe a savings bond.

 

[java]

Another goat vote here!! Now I really don't think you will change their attitude with one goat- but in doing it in their name- they would get the literature from the heiffer project in the future. Why waste your money? I got the same feeling from sil- her teens got to the point where she would say"oh the things they like are so expensive- just give them $$$" I would send $$ then never hear if they even got it so I just stopped.

 

[lchadwick]

I was going to say donate to a charity in their names, as well. They won't appreciate your gift, but the charity sure would! Some kids are never happy/satisfied, so don't think you have to bend over backwards to make them happy, especially when the chances are they won't be.
My kids aren't spoiled (I can't afford to spoil them!), but with this Christmas, when we are going to WDW, everyone is pretty much giving us money (as a family) to let us treat ourselves when we're down there. My 13YO understands, and my 4YO and almost 2YO won't notice. And less stuff for me to have to find room for!!!!!
Good luck and Merry Christmas!

 

[dizcrazy]

I liked the snowed in basket, or maybe a movie basket with candy and tickets?

The savings bond idea was a good one - or how about a stock? I bought the Disney stock (see mousesavers) for my neice and my nephew (age 10) was in shock. an hour later, he came ot me asking if she owned part of the castle, could push the button for fireworks, get in the front of line at Splash Mountain . . . it was a riot. He was truly fascinated and I am getting his own share for Christmas.

 

[leafette]

My husband has two second cousins that we see once a year at Christmas who are in this category, so I feel your pain. Usually they look exceptionally bored at our presents, so I have gradually reduced the amount I spend each year because I don't think it will appreciated anyway. I'd rather spend the money on my daughter's Giving Tree program, where the class is buying for a 3YO girl who otherwise won't be getting anything this Christmas.

I did semi-score with them last year with i-Tunes gift cards.