Bullying at karate class

[Aidensmom]

I know there are a lot of parents here with children in karate and similar, and am looking for a little guidance.

My 5 year old son is a yellow belt in a karate club. When practicing sparring, yellow and other low ranking belts are not allowed contact, they have to stay at least 2 inches from touching the other person.

My son is the youngenst in the club, it is composed of kids of all ages and adults. There is a boy who is about 6 who seems to have decided it is OK to pick on my son because he is smaller, and whenever he is my son's sparring partner, every chance he gets when the Sensei isn't looking, he makes contact kicking or punching. My son has gotten a few bruises from it. The Sensei caught him one time and told him in no uncertain terms that he needed to stop it or leave class. Well, that hasn't helped. It took all I had today to not get up and walk out onto the floor and yell at that boy.

I discussed it with my son after class, and told him he does NOT have to just take that, that the other boy is breaking the rules, and he needs to tell the other boy to stop and if he continues he needs to call to his Sensei.

Is that the right thing to do? Should I talk to the Sensei myself? A big part of karate is teaching confidence and defense, and so I don't want to overstep that by being an overprotective parent, but I don't want my child hurt and also he is beginning to not want to go anymore because of this.

The other child's parents do not stay and watch the class, they just drop him off and pick him up.

 

[Disney Doll]

I owuld mention to the Sensei that he may need to keep a closer eye on this child, because the child is sneaky and does make contact with your DS when the sensei isn't looking.

Then let the sensei handle it.

 

[fan_of_small_world]

You could encourage your DS to tell the sensei the next time it happens. However, I personally would have to say something to the sensei myself before the next class. There is no reason your son should be bullied, and 5 is very young to have to deal with on his own. In fact, at our DS's karate studio they offer "bully-proofing" days several times a year. They take it very seriously, as I'm sure your sensei does.

ETA: Keeping your child from being kicked isn't being overprotective, it's being a good parent!

 

[Alison Wonderland]

Most definitely notify the Sensei. I think he/she would want to know. I was in the same situation a few years back.

 

[kejoda]

I would be taping the class and then show the sensei.

 

[Aidensmom]

Thanks. I will mention it next class.

 

[aprilgail2]

I would say something. My daughter spars a kid that always hits her right above her chest protector. They are allowed contact in her sparring class, kicks to the head, punches etc so if they catch them above the chest portector it hurts!

 

[sha_lyn]

mention it to the Sensei but without anyone around.

[ My daughter spars a kid that always hits her right above her chest protector. They are allowed contact in her sparring class, kicks to the head, punches etc so if they catch them above the chest portector it hurts/QUOTE]

Unfortunately some are taught 1/2 on 1/2 off equal on, and they try to perfect that in practice matches. the idea being to make the collarbone area very sore, so they forfeit the match, or start evading the opponent and are disqualified or given penality points.

 

[chris1gill]

OK, my first thought on this? Why haven't your brought this to the Sensei directly? Your son is going to quickly become discouraged at this early stage in karate if this keeps up, I wouldn't tolerate it...

Now this is coming from a mother whose 1st degree black belt is getting his butt kicked in the 2nd degree sparring class!! He's sort of in between, he beats the heck out of those his age and below, but now he's sparring with 2nd & 3rd degree's and he's seriously getting wiped out, but he's learning, he realizes he's learning, he's been doing this for five years and he has confidence.... as a five year old yellow belt you need to be the voice for your son... heck, even though my son is 12 I still need to be his voice at karate sometimes.....

 

[Narnian_Princess]

Doesn't the Sensei have helpers? We always put one instructor per "ring" of sparring, especially with the smaller kids. That way we can watch, give encouragement, make sure the kids are keeping their hands up, and make sure the kids aren't hitting too hard. If they are, we give them a warning and if they continue we have them sit out of class. There is no reason for a single instructor to think he can magically watch all areas of the floor, especially when the kids are doing something that can get them hurt.

That being said, you should definitely bring it up with the Sensei. Ask him to pretend to not be watching, and see what the kid does. Your child is 5; he does need to learn to take care of his own problems, but this seems like a situation you should handle, especially at his age. And, no, you're not being overprotective. You're being a caring mother.

 

[Steamboat Marti]

Mom of advanced purple belt here - and he's nine.

First off, we all understand that children will get some bruises while at karate. That being said, run to that Sensei now! No child should feel that way, ever - especially in karate class. This is exactly what they are trying to teach NOT to do. Our Sensei thanks us for feedback such as this. Our son was being bullied in school and we told our Sensei, and she helped immensely. She calmed him down, offered suggestions on how to handle things and listened to his concerns.

Please give your Sensei a chance - and let us know what they say.

 

[Aidensmom]

Again, thank you for the feedback. I think I knew I needed to say something, but I try hard to let my child do what he can for himself and sometimes it is hard to know where to draw that line.

The beginner class (white belts) has helpers whose primary purpose is to help, but in the intermediate/advanced class the helpers are also training and so don't really do as much helping. I agree it is a lot of people for the Sensei to be looking over.

I probably won't be taking DS again until Monday, so I will try to update then.

 

[java]

I have 2 children in Tae kwon do- a big burly black belt 12 year old(boy) and a tiny 45 pound red belt 9 year old(girl) I knew I was going to have trouble when at a tournament I hear my dd say to the boy she is set to sparr"please be gentle with me I am not feeling so well" then goes on to kick his butt- If you could have seen the boys face Like "Omg I have just been played!" DD is the sneaky one. But there was a boy in her school that was being very very rough- left a mark on her. I spoke to the Head of the school. They handled it. I also said I do not want my daughter to be partnered with that boy until they could guarantee that he would follow the rules. She doesn't have to worry about him anymore they dropped out.
If it is NO CONTACT and he is making contact on your son- that is a blatant breaking of the rules. He needs to be told and perhaps held out of sparring until he can follow the rules.

 

[Aidensmom]

My husband took my son to the beginner class tonight for some extra practice, and the other child was there as well..his Sensei was out sick, but DH did speak to one of the helpers about the problem, I am sure it will get back to the Sensei. I will still say something though on Monday.