Boys in womens restrooms

[live and let live]

I've been lucky enough to go to Disney for the last 17 years, but our last trip in december I noticed lots of boys aged 8 years and older, who were taller than my mam in there. On one occasion a boy who was around 8 bent down on the floor to look under the doors peaking, i dont really expect going to the restroom to use the toilet to be a spectator sport, i just wonder when this became acceptable and will this be displayed one day on screen outside the restrooms? Anyone have any stratagies for how to deal with this type of behaviour?

But seriously apart from babies, people who feel the need to bring 8 year old boys plus into the ladies restrooms, surely it would be better use the companion restrooms, so the responsibility is not left to someone else to control someone elses child whilst the childs parent is using the toilet. Would the concerned parents not prefer to use the companion restrooms, thereby respecting the rights of women and girls to use restrooms that are male free.

It's assumed that boys are the victims now, however, here in England a 15 year old boy raped an 11 year old in supermarket toilets, so when is the age that boys stop being able to go into ladies restrooms?

Here's a link to the incident:
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/main.jhtml? xml=/news/2006/03/30/urape.xml

I just wonder if anyone has considered that boys could be accused of behaving improperly with girls? I also wonder if people taking boys into restrooms appriciate that their boys could be accused of approaching young girls inappropriatly.

I must say that 10 years ago I never saw boys at the age of around 8 plus in the ladies restrooms.

 

[TinyLolitaBunny]

Well I dont know wether or not its an issue of danger somewhere like Disney because there are so many people around, but I do think its inapporopriate after a certain age- and 8 is definatly too old in my opinion. and you are right- there are compainion restrooms for a reason. And if there is an older male available in the family he should take the boy.

 

[SlightlyGoofy]

I say it depends on the 8 year old. My 8 year old grandson decided at 6 that he was too old to go to the woman's restroom (most boys do not want to go in there IMO) and his mom started just standing outside the bathroom when he went. The local WM was robbed a couple of years ago and we were horrified to realize that he was in the bathroom with the robbers for awhile. He was made to go back to the ladies room with us for a bit but he is back to the men's room with one of us standing within earshot and not bit embarrassed to go in after him if anything seems odd.

I would much rather be a bit embarrassed in the restroom with a young boy being in there than to have something happen to him. It is a scary world out there sometimes.

If a boy is old enough to WANT to look under the stalls for entertainment value he is too old to be in there at all.

I always told my daughter that when it was more fun for Santa to have her on his lap than for her to be there it was time to stop! (ROTFLMBO)

Slightly Goofy

 

[GEM]

How the heck is a 9 year old boy going to be accused of touching a girl inappropriately when he's in the bathroom with his mother?? It's not like women are sending their boys into women's bathrooms alone. They go in with them.

For the record, I don't get all the hoopla about this. I've been to Disney 15 times and I've seen lots of young boys in the women's rooms. I've never had one peek under my door, between the door, etc. I'm sure it happens occasionally, but it certainly isn't the norm. It's not like there are teenage boys hanging out and getting their jollies in women's rooms all across Disney World. We're talking 5, 6, 7, 8, 9 year olds going in with moms and grandmas to pee. It's hardly some kind of kiddie strip show.

And, besides, unless you ask, you have no idea how old these boys you are seeing are. I have a 3 year old that could easily pass for a 18 month old. I also have a five year old nephew that is WAY tall for his age and could easily be taken for an 8 year old. There's no way to know, really.

Seriously, if seeing a nine year old boy with his mother in the women's restroom is the most traumatizing thing to happen to you on your vacation, CONGRATULATIONS! You did well!

 

[A Mickeyfan]

At Disney where it is very crowded & there are almost always people in the restrooms, 8 is too old. Now on the other hand, in a department store...no 8 is not too old. They are hardly every occupied & to have an 8 yr old go into the mens room in a dept store is not too safe... in Disney, there is nothing to worry about.

 

[GEM]

. . to have an 8 yr old go into the mens room in a dept store is not too safe... in Disney, there is nothing to worry about.

That's where we disagree. Actually, Disney restrooms can be much worse, because they often have multiple exits that you wouldn't be aware of when standing outside.

Will I take Paul with me in the ladies room when he's 8? Who knows? If I genuinely feel that it would be the safest choice for him. Heck, yes. I sure will. In a heartbeat.

 

[TinyLolitaBunny]

At Disney where it is very crowded & there are almost always people in the restrooms, 8 is too old. Now on the other hand, in a department store...no 8 is not too old. They are hardly every occupied & to have an 8 yr old go into the mens room in a dept store is not too safe... in Disney, there is nothing to worry about.

Well I wouldnt say just cause its Disney it's safe... but like I said if a family restroom is available its more appropriate, or a man to take them in. However if thats not available you do what you have to do! Your kids safety is most important.
Just wanted to make sure I explained that I dont think it isnt

 

[mom2riceboys]

How the heck is a 9 year old boy going to be accused of touching a girl inappropriately when he's in the bathroom with his mother?? It's not like women are sending their boys into women's bathrooms alone. They go in with them.

For the record, I don't get all the hoopla about this. I've been to Disney 15 times and I've seen lots of young boys in the women's rooms. I've never had one peek under my door, between the door, etc. I'm sure it happens occasionally, but it certainly isn't the norm. It's not like there are teenage boys hanging out and getting their jollies in women's rooms all across Disney World. We're talking 5, 6, 7, 8, 9 year olds going in with moms and grandmas to pee. It's hardly some kind of kiddie strip show.

And, besides, unless you ask, you have no idea how old these boys you are seeing are. I have a 3 year old that could easily pass for a 18 month old. I also have a five year old nephew that is WAY tall for his age and could easily be taken for an 8 year old. There's no way to know, really.

Seriously, if seeing a nine year old boy iwith his mother in the women's restroom is the most traumatizing thing to happen to you on your vacation, CONGRATULATIONS! You did well!

I totally agree. I don't care if a mother brings her son into the womens bathroom. For goodness sakes, you are in a stall with the door closed. It's not like the toilets are in the middle of the room with no doors. I still make my 5 year old come in with me. He doesn't like it, but too bad. I also take him into the stall with me. I make him turn his back to me if I have to use the faciilities. I wouldn't leave him out in the bathroom while I am in the stall. I used to take my oldest in with me too. I did this until he was 8 and began to refuse to go into the womens. He is 10 now and I have to tell you I don't like for him to go into the mens' room alone. I don't care if it is at Disney. It makes me nervous. I don't get how some people say "it's Disney". Big deal. A child can be molested anywhere. You hear on the news where it happens at churches, parks, etc. So, IMHO, it could happen at Disney too. I thinks mothers need to do what they are comfortable with. If they want to take their sons into the ladies room, then don't worry about stares from a few folks. Also, with regard to the companion bathrooms. These are different from FAMILY bathrooms. It is my understanding that companion bathrooms are for people with disabilities and their caregivers. Sorry for the long post, but I have been reading threads about boys in bathrooms for a few days and wanted to give my two cents.

 

[GEM]

Also, with regard to the companion bathrooms. These are different from FAMILY bathrooms. It is my understanding that companion bathrooms are for people with disabilities and their caregivers. Sorry for the long post, but I have been reading threads about boys in bathrooms for a few days and wanted to give my two cents.

This is correct. Disney does not have "family" restrooms. They do have a few "companion" restrooms, which are technically for the handicapped who need assistance when using the facilities.

 

[PolyPal]

Well, I take my almost 8 year old son into the men's room wherever we go. And yes, he will peek under a stall door to look for someone's feet in order to determine if the stall is available for him to use. If I were not with him, my wife would have no problem taking him into the women's room.

We just got back from WDW and can't recall ever seeing a "family rest room."

 

[liamandcaili]

My DS is seven and I would absolutely take him into the women's bathroom with me. If there was a family restroom available, I would use that, but I haven't seen many at Disney. When a child needs to use the facilities, he/she needs to use the closest available spot. You can't be searching the map looking for the family bathroom. And I'm sorry, I am not letting my 7 YO into the restroom without accompaniment.

This brings up a disturbing thought. I have taken my children to Disney a couple of times without DH (he's Army). If he ever took them without me, what would he do? I definitely wouldn't want DD in the men's restroom! Maybe it's time for Family Restrooms at Disney!

 

[Tinky]

Here's our situation..
Trip is me, DSIL, DD6, DS8 and DS10months.. (DH is currently in Iraq)

*No male family member to accompany DS into the restroom
*DS would be mortifed to have to go into the ladies
*He's a smart, savy kid but I am terrified that he will get "caught up" and get confused on which exit he would come out of

On one hand I dont want to make him uncomforatable but on the other hand I want him to be safe.

So I guess to someone who suggested that a male family member accompany them sometimes thats just not available. And I hate to occupy the companion bathroom for some folks who need them.

At a loss....

 

[Angiepea]

This is correct. Disney does not have "family" restrooms. They do have a few "companion" restrooms, which are technically for the handicapped who need assistance when using the facilities.

Maybe this is something Disney needs to think about, family restrooms. I know what the first poster means, and yes I have been one of the unfortunates to have a young boy looking under the door, while his mother is in the toilet, she left him to his own devices......she may as well let the kid go in the gents.

Family rest rooms would be ideal, the disable restrooms could be increased with another sign stating they are also family ones.

I feel the flames
Angie

 

[dtaylor98]

I think if a mom takes her son into the restroom, regardless of his age, she should be responsible for him and make sure he doesn't surprise any of the women in there by peeking under the doors.

 

[momof2inPA]

I don't understand your post. Do you think the boy in the restroom was looking for someone to rape? Did you card these children to identify their ages?

To be honest, I let my 8 year old go to the boy's restroom himself last time we went to Disney, but that was the first time. So, at 7 and six, he was in the Ladies' Room with me. If he was looking under the door, it was only for feet-- trust me.

 

[liamandcaili]

I think if a mom takes her son into the restroom, regardless of his age, she should be responsible for him and make sure he doesn't surprise any of the women in there by peeking under the doors.

I agree, but sometimes boys do things their moms would never expect them to do. My DS is very well behaved and listens to what I say (he knows not to peek under doors), but the last time I took him into the women's room at Disney, he was pretend playing football outside the stalls while waiting for me. He nearly crashed into someone. I had never told him that he couldn't play football in the restroom, so I guess that made it okay.

 

[NJOYURLIFE]

I get aroung this by telling my 11 year old son that he has to hold it in until we get back to the room

Seriously though, this has been a problem for me since he started refusing to go into the ladies room with me a few years back. I try to make sure he goes before we leave, but you can't always control nature. So I just pray and try to find restrooms with only one exit and I go crazy when he is in there a while which can sometimes happen. I'll do the same thing (lots of praying) when he gets his driver license in a few years.

I do think however that there are bigger problems in this world than young boys being in a women's rest room with their parent.

 

[liamandcaili]

Here's our situation..
Trip is me, DSIL, DD6, DS8 and DS10months.. (DH is currently in Iraq)....

Off topic, but my DH is in Iraq right now too. Pixie dust to you!

 

[lookingforward]

I think that moms should be able to bring their 8 year old sons in to the restrooms. It is not safe to let a young child into a restroom by themselves (girls or boys). The mother should be responsible for the childs behavior, of course. I was in Yankee stadium at the more upscale restuarant when I took my 6 year old son to the bathroom. It was crowded and there was a line and a bathroom attendent. She asked me how old he was and I said "6" and she started yelling at me that only five and under...GET OUT!. Well, the mens room had a line and was very crowded too. I begged her, pleaded with her, but she caused quite a scene. So I marched over to the mens room, opened the door, and stood in the doorway while he went to the bathroom. The men at the urinals did not even turn around, I was a mother on a mission. There was NO way I was going to let a six year old boy into a mens room at Yankee stadium by himself. Unfortunately, there are predators everywhere, and although the chances are a million to one, I prefer to not roll the dice.

There is a funny scene in Rosie O'Donnell's new documentary about gay friendly cruises where she talks about how mad her son is when she insists he go into the women's bathroom with her. He was nine and not at all happy about it.

 

[LuluLovesDisney]

On the subject of girls in the men's room, I have been asked on several occasions by complete strangers to watch their little girl in the ladies' room. I've always helped out, but I think *that's* a bigger challenge.