Best Man Issues

[BrideToBe82]

Ok so I already have all of my bridesmaids and my MOH picked out...my fiance on the other hand is still thinking about who he wants as his best man. Best man choice #1 is someone that I know and like. Best man choice #2 is someone that I have never even met. I havent met him due to distance and also the fact that my fiance is not as close to him as he once used to be. I am upset because if my fiance picks #2 what in the heck is he going to say during the first toast..."Congratulations Rich and nice meeting you Vanessa"

Is this completely up to my fiance or should I tell him my opinion? Have any of you had similiar experiences?

Oh yeah and on a side note...does anyone have any ideas for asking groomsmen to be in the wedding? They live far away so it would have to be something that we could send to them. Thanks

 

[mommyintn]

This is from the other side but when dh and I got married 4 out of 5 of my bridesmaids were from out of state. My maid of honor came in April and met my soon to be husband and then back out in August for the wedding. It really meant a lot to me to have "old" friends in my wedding. I even had one of my oldest friends as an usher (also from out of state). And of course if #2 choice is best man see if he can come out a little early so you can all go to dinner or something, he might have some sweet things to say about you (even if he just met you). I'd talk to you Df and discuss your concerns but I'd let him choose in the end.

 

[Moonpie]

I think that picking a best man might be up to your fiance. He's supposed to pick someone to stand by his side, someone who means a lot to him, someone who will ultimately help with the ceremony. Maybe you all could take some time to meet before hand. I'm sure that if your fiance's got good enough taste in people to have proposed to you, that this number 2 guy will be a wonderful person as well.

Question:
Do you all pick what your groomsmen wear? I'm not sure if I should ask my fiance's best man to get a new suit. I'm not sure it's my place to ask.

 

[hmgolden]

I would voice your concerns to you Fiance, but in the end it should be his choice who he picks has best man. If he does pick guy #2, perhaps you could make a point to meet him prior to the wedding, either him coming out to visit you or going to visit him.

 

[twojo21]

i think the best man is totally up to the fiance/h2b. you can certainly share your thoughts though maybe try arranging a get together before the wedding so you can all meet.

as for asking groomsmen from a distance get on the phone & ask them, vanessa & i are getting married & i wanted to ask if you would be my groomsmen?

 

[BrideToBe82]

Ok I know that picking a best man is totally up to him. I did suggest to him that he could have two best men...I'm hoping he will go with this option since he is having such a hard time deciding.

Any creative ways on how to ask groomsmen to be in the wedding?

 

[superdiz]

I didn't pressure my fiance to choose a best man. I think the decision is completely up to him. Unless there is something horrendously wrong with this guy, I'd let him choose. You will be making most of the other decisions

 

[krissyh]

I was at a wedding recently where the couple chose a couple who were not in the wedding (huge wedding party too) to deliver the toast. It was a couple that was good freinds with both the bride and groom.
This might also take some pressure of DF - he can ask far away guy to be best man but ask the guy that knows you to deliver the toast. Just because it is tradition for the best man to give the toast does not mean you have to do it that way. I would think both guys would be honored and the far guy won't have to feel strange since he doesn't know you. You could even have the "toast guy" share that duty with a non-MOH bridesmaid.

Congratulations.