I'm reading Grace's posts, and thinking, "Why does this sound like she's trying to get a divorce, not get her kid into the proper therapies in school?"
I wanted to mention that the lady I know whose son with many ASD type isues who pulled the insulin pump from another child's stomach this Spring was told by her school that they wouldn't do anything other than punishment for bad behavior UNTIL they had a Dr.'s evaluation. I told her that was wrong, but apparently they kicked the kid out of school until she got a "diagnosis".
So I wonder how much leeway administrators have to manipulate this.
And Grace, we've all been through this and I'm sorry. Here's my advice: do everything else everyone says here, first. Second, if you don't get the answer you need, then go to the next person up the food chain. I actually called the Superintendent at both school systems we've been in. Just the secretary that answered the phone was able to get me to THE person to fix my problem both times I pulled that trick. I never got mad, I just said I was confused by the answers I had been given and I needed help. It also helps to do your homework, too. They know what the rules are. They just pray that you don't.
I'll never forget when my sister, the attorney, and I showed up at the office of a school district department head to plead my son's case two year ago. We were very nice, but tag teamed him. We not only got what we wanted, but were given an open invitation to come back any time as long as we brought him some coffee and doughnuts, since he had so much "fun" talking to us.
In that same vein, remember that most low income kids with disabilities have an attorney representing them. If you can't pull out the lawyer card, then fake it. As in, "Well, if you say so about the subject, but I will just run it by my attorney and see what he says...(with a big smile on your face)".
Tackle this like a job, not a personal rejection. The more emotional you appear to some people, the more they get off on abusing you. Remember, life is like high school, except everyone is fatter and meaner. So know what you want and ask for it and don't take no for an answer.
That's the pep talk.
