Behavior Challenge Thread

[saveaquarter]

I am sad over the ER ending too

For real! Sad doesn't even begin to cover what J is feeling. At least it was an amazing episode, though!

 

[C&G'sMama]

Sorry I overslept and didn't make it to Manhattan. We are dying eggs today. We will do 1 1/2 dozen and fortunately my kids love them.

DDM, I'll take your son to NYC. I haven't been in 15 years!! I absolutely love it and have friends and some nieces that live there. We drove to Long Island last October for a PTA conference and had to drive through the city. The kids really want to go. So we think we'll find a hotel on Long Island or in New Jerseay near a train and try to go in for a couple of days. Last June I had a conference in Chicago and was right in the middle of the action. I was alone so I got to walk around and soak it in. I loved it.

Anyway. We are cleaning today. Our house is a disaster. So to encourage the kids I threw some coins around the living room and family room when they weren't looking and then told them any money they found was theirs. DS found my work badge (that I need to get in the building and has been missing for a week). So I gave him an extra quarter. My Driver's license and a UPC code in an envelope that will enable me to submit a rebate request for $50 are also worth a quarter. DS is riding around on a broom while cleaning but he's trying.

 

[DisDreaminMom]

OK, couple of things. I haven't watched the last ER yet. I DVR'd it, but haven't gotten to watch. I didn't watch last year for some reason. I think the Darfur episodes just made me and I had to take a break. So I'll watch it just for old times sake, because I really did love the show at one point. Saveaquarter, sorry DH is so sad. I got like that about the Harry Potter books and I'll admit I'm a dork. How overdue are you? With twins? Wow! Fingers crossed...Let us know how you are.

Mechurchlady, I know you've got troubles, but you are one smart cookie. You are a bargain hunter and a budget whiz. I'm so bad at that sort of thing. I try, but you're a Tour De Force.

I cooked and cleaned all day. I was so mad at the kids that by 4:00pm, I ended up digging a 34 foot garden bed by the end of the house and planting all the flowers I bought last week but have been dragging in the garage at night to keep from freezing. Home Depot had annuals on sale last weekend 3 for a $1. The greenhouse must have made a big ****oo and gotten the flowers ready too soon. It's right up against the house, so a mild frost won't zap them. It was either me bury the flowers or one of the kids. DS was in rare form all day.

I will pay someone to take DS to as many big cities as possible. He wants to live in a big city and I swear they give me panic attacks. I think he'd be the kind of kid to walk around all alone and not care what's going on around him. I'll take your kids to WDW. It's just more comfortable for me.

I am doing my normal "take in stragglers" for the holiday, which means my simple, no fuss Easter meal is now 9 adults and 4 kids.

We dyed eggs, too. I used icing tints instead of normal egg dye and the colors came out speckled. Totally awesome! I will never, ever let an Easter go by without doing the eggs. My DH and kids think boiled eggs are the best thing in the world, but I'm not a fan. So I'm glad I've got someone to eat them.

I was overwhelmed with work, trying to get promotion, doing taxes (yes, I still haven't done them-don't judge me!) and dinner for 13. DH tries to be nice and actually clean. Fantastic, but he keeps on saying, "You're welcome!" and "Aren't you amazed at how wonderful I am?" and I finally had to say to him, "The mere fact that we've been married for 13 years and you are cleaning the coffee and end tables for the first time EVER is reason enough that, NO, I am not impressed! I do this crap all the time and I'm not using the monogrammed stationery to send you a Thank You note!"

If I keep being this stressed, I'm heading for a major case of shingles outbreak. I gotta chill out...Imagining Dole Whips and Tree House Villas.

Happy Easter!!

 

[C&G'sMama]

Hope everyone survives

Being the worst moms in the world we didn't get the Plastic Eggs filled much less hidden before the kids got up nor were the Easter Baskets ready. DS was a little upset as "we always do things on time". Not sure which universe he is living in. This is the first year I haven't done taxes on the side but DP still works for a small CPA during tax season so she's going into work today. And I still have to do a NY return for a friend. So, we've always been late with Easter.

Fortunately my sister is having Easter at her house so all we have to do is bake a ham.

Take Care all.

 

[saveaquarter]

OK, couple of things. I haven't watched the last ER yet. I DVR'd it, but haven't gotten to watch. I didn't watch last year for some reason. I think the Darfur episodes just made me and I had to take a break. So I'll watch it just for old times sake, because I really did love the show at one point. Saveaquarter, sorry DH is so sad. I got like that about the Harry Potter books and I'll admit I'm a dork. How overdue are you? With twins? Wow! Fingers crossed...Let us know how you are.

It's a GREAT episode, it really is. If you have the means, refresh yourself on the pilot, the last episode follows that form to the letter, and a lot of old faces showed up.

We're just kind of waiting it out. If the most recent due date is accurate, I'm about a week past due. My doctor's had a hard time getting accurate measurements on me and has always been a bit fuzzy about when they'd be coming.

Happy Easter everyone!

 

[C&G'sMama]

It's a GREAT episode, it really is. If you have the means, refresh yourself on the pilot, the last episode follows that form to the letter, and a lot of old faces showed up.

We're just kind of waiting it out. If the most recent due date is accurate, I'm about a week past due. My doctor's had a hard time getting accurate measurements on me and has always been a bit fuzzy about when they'd be coming.

Happy Easter everyone!

Agree on ER, loved it. I didn't want to like SouthLand, but I really liked it, so I can watch that. We'll need to start buying ER on DVD.

Good Luck with the baby, sending good thoughts your way.

 

[mechurchlady]

HAPPY EASTER
So glad to be here and going for another nap attack.
Take care and remember that them apples fall close to the tree.
What you think of my pretty tags? I am so happy with them.
It is nice to have a pretty set of tags though honestly I think the Tag Fairy was wrong on the last one but then again I do not see myself an expert on anything but hugging and eating. I am so craving a cheddarburger.

Making chicken tonight and so wanted it to be a special Easter.

Hugs
Laurie

Sharing is caring and this board is about caring soooo
Start caring by sharing that chocolate, please.

 

[pudge the fish]

ooooh I like the tags

I will gladly accept chocolate - in almost anyway, shape or form

I don't like big cities- Orlando is about as big as I am willing to get and I am a tiny bit away from there. youngest DD LOVES the excitement and bustle-

beckyscott you could bring me leftover dyed Easter eggs and we could take a side trip to Disney... I am only around the corner from the Mouse...

YUMM Cheddarburgers

C&G's mama- When youngest DD was in the shower yesterday afternoon, I tossed change in her room and told her if she cleaned her room and found $$ she could keep it. ( kinda like your idea but stretched it) I really thought it would work... NO of course not... one pile of stuff is moved to another area- another pile of stuff is going to start moving on it's own..
I told her that I was coming in with a trash can and tossing EVERYTHING and then I was the MEAN mom...door slams... MEAN MEAN MEAN Mom-more door slams


tomorrow is MORE blood work to see whats up with the sugar issues with her.

 

[C&G'sMama]

C&G's mama- When youngest DD was in the shower yesterday afternoon, I tossed change in her room and told her if she cleaned her room and found $$ she could keep it. ( kinda like your idea but stretched it) I really thought it would work... NO of course not... one pile of stuff is moved to another area- another pile of stuff is going to start moving on it's own..
I told her that I was coming in with a trash can and tossing EVERYTHING and then I was the MEAN mom...door slams... MEAN MEAN MEAN Mom-more door slams tomorrow is MORE blood work to see whats up with the sugar issues with her.

Yes, you're mean, that's means you're doing something right

Don't get me wrong about the money thing, it still isn't "House Beautiful" but they picked up some stuff. I also offered them a quarter each if they could not talk from about 3 miles away from the house on the way home from Easter Dinner at my sisters. It was the Usual "Brother, Stop, Stop" "Sister, you're mean" "Would you both stop?" "Okay, 1 2 3 mum, whoever last the longest gets a quarter, if you can both make it home without talking, you both get a quarter". They both made it home with out talking. I asked DP if I offered them $50 bucks each if she thought they could make it all the way to Florida. We'll be lucky if they made it 5 miles out. It's a 1,250 mile drive.

 

[mechurchlady]

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=390042269782

It is ratty looking and I am hoping it has good batteries. I paid $125 on my Visa card. I have to wait until Monday for the doctor then weeks for the referral to go in and if that does not work then write SCAN then a month or more to get a scooter. I still have not recovered from that giant bruise on my leg from the week before divas and it is a large knot and the bruising is there.

I cannot afford this but am just going to max the card as I need the scooter. With a scooter I go to the parks then I walk. My ankles are less swollen and actually have shape and clothes fit better now that I am going to parks.

Sorry to bother you all. I had barbecue chicken, mom had lemon pepper chicken, and my special Lundgren's Tuscan rice with some frozen veggies added to make a two dish and two pan meal.

We need to find someone wealthy to help us all out. Hugs the fishie and whispers YOU ARE NOT A MEAN MOMMA. In life she will have an office or a home and she will have to keep it clean so start now and she will eventually learn how to move out of your tyranny into her own place or learn to love a clean room.

Big hugs and chocolates for all
Laurie

 

[DisDreaminMom]

Mechurchlady, great TAGS and even better smart shopping! I love the ad where it says, "She may not be the prettiest girl at the dance, but she boogies like nobody's business." How did they know all about me? I will tell you that the best way to lose weight and feel better about life is to able to do what you love best, and if that's getting out to DLR and scooting around in the sunshine, then go for it! Easter dinner sounded good, too. Hope Mom had a nice day and was kind. Did the Easter bunny bring you your favorite chocolates? I know the Post-Easter Sale candy bunny might be your best deal right now!

I made a ginormous lunch yesterday, and if I do say so myself, it was fabulous. I made flan for the first time ever and we ate the whole thing. I also made a fresh strawberry lemonade and it was a-maz-ing. (Simple syrup, cut up berries, and a bunch of lemons- how easy!) All the guests asked to take home the leftovers, which is the surest sign you made a good meal. I always joke with my DH that I'm the Harry Bellafonte song, "If you want to be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife. So from my personal point of view, get an ugly girl to marry you".

So remember how I told you about my friend's 9 year old son who had to be put in a mental facility a few weeks ago? He was in there for over 2 weeks, on suicide watch. I saw him yesterday at a big Easter egg hunt. Imagine about 12 kids, gathered together Easter Day specifically for an Easter egg hunt. This boy goes shooting off like a rocket, practically knocking kids over to get eggs (he's also the oldest one there). He gets three times more eggs than any other child and when we've found everything, he walks up to me, looks straight at me and says, "Is this a competition? Do I win?"

He then proceeded to open every single egg to get the candy or money inside, and left all the plastic eggs in the grass and walked away. Yes, I already gave the Mom my copy of Tony Attwood. I don't think she's too fast in the old uptake department. She was the cheerleader, dating the football captain kinda girl and it doesn't translate into "Mom of Aspie".

Pudge, your story about DD is too funny. Wasn't it Dr. Phil that said you had to find your kid's currency and use it? For instance, I could hide French Horns in DS's room, and he would clean up. It would only cost me a few thousand a piece.

 

[mechurchlady]

http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?p=31278187#post31278187

I met a handsome man yesterday whom I did something with that I never done before. I cooked dinner then crashed. Not telling more.

Hugs and chocolates everyone.
Laurie

 

[BeckyScott]

Laurie Laurie Laurie!

I always joke with my DH that I'm the Harry Bellafonte song, "If you want to be happy for the rest of your life, never make a pretty woman your wife. So from my personal point of view, get an ugly girl to marry you".

This goes right along with a personal fave of mine- Ron White's "You can't fix stupid". It's a little long to explain here but if you've seen it you know what I mean...

Yes, I already gave the Mom my copy of Tony Attwood. I don't think she's too fast in the old uptake department. She was the cheerleader, dating the football captain kinda girl and it doesn't translate into "Mom of Aspie".

For what good it does, Jenny McCarthy's history didn't exactly point to Autism Warrior Mom either. So there's hope for everyone I guess. All you can do is try.

Pudge, your story about DD is too funny. Wasn't it Dr. Phil that said you had to find your kid's currency and use it? For instance, I could hide French Horns in DS's room, and he would clean up. It would only cost me a few thousand a piece.

I guess I could start hiding the Wii games in DS's room. But he doesn't pick it up, he just bulldozes until he finds what he is looking for. He isn't one of those lining-stuff-up neat-freak types though, he's fully messy. He doesn't like other people touching his stuff, and he tends to "collect" things, but all of it is full chaos.

 

[pudge the fish]

it didn't work with DD either- I just got the almost 11yo MOOOMMM look
Eye roll and big sighs- no cleaning- just change hidden among the piles of stuff
I have a drama queen for a child- threw a fit as someone moved her Joe Jonas pillow..it HAS to be set a certain way...the stuffed animals have to sit a certain way around the pillow- NOT covering the pillow..
Pillow is now sitting on my bed until she can apologize and chill out.

add one Life is horrible-I hate everything- sigh- I have it soooo bad 16YO

plus a 25 YO who is annoyed by our even saying we are related *GASP* How dare we tell others we are related?????

this means I need to go visit Epcot for an adult slushie in France or Mexico

waiting for test results for DD to see about her sugar issues....if it is diabetes or hypo or hyper- I hate waiting..

 

[mechurchlady]

CAlvin caused major problems as usual as mom was shutdown full red alert hypersensitive today and he comes over. House is clean, laundry is um, and I have a hospital bed, woot. I can raise this now and sit nice and high so my arm does not hurt.

ATTENTION
We are all going to Flor e da and visit Pudge and have us a mom/kid/spouse free vacation.

 

[DisDreaminMom]

Hooray for the new bed, Mechurchlady! Isn't that what you've been waiting for? I hope your sleep improves and you can feel more rested! Sounds like you've had a blessed week- new scooter, new bed, and new fun with Bill! So much hard work and it all paid off. That's wonderful. Yea You! Sorry Mom was in a snit. Everyone I met yesterday was a total grouch. Bad day all around.

Sign me up for the Adults only trip. Just gotta find someone to watch the kidlets. Seriously, I have been considering this type of trip for a while. I just need to clear my head.

What do you think of ABA therapists? I have NO IDEA about this stuff, and a new woman moved into town that had an ABA therapy business in another state. She works with ASD kids and parents to find sitters and other therapies, too. Bookwormde, any thoughts? I am asking because I needed a summer sitter and this woman answered an ad I had. She hasn't built up a large clientele yet, and could work the limited hours I need her. Since we are Aspie, I don't know what, if any benefit someone with this training might have. It's not like DS is a traditional ASD kid. My "Stitch" just has a few glitches, not a full system breakdown.

I bought him a book on Orchestras about 3 weeks ago. I swear to God he has memorized the entire thing. Last night he was telling me about the lip plate on the flute and all 3 sizes of the trombone. Best question he asked me last night, "What's your favorite reed type in the reed instrument family?"

Ummm, I'll get right on researching that so I can give an educated answer...

I'm still trying to find him a music teacher. At this point, I really need a musical savant that owns and plays tons of instruments, as our interest has expanded exponentially. Maybe the adult version of my DS.

 

[BeckyScott]

We did a little discrete trial w/ DS when he was much younger, like around 2 1/2 years old.

(perhaps Eeyore's Butterfly can explain better the difference, we did the Judevine training, which isn't ABA but is pretty darn close)

We found that he didn't really "need" it. But that's just us. We also never used PECs with him. We tried it for a couple weeks when the OT was at our house, and DS thought it was funny to carry the PECs around and hide them. The preschool did a visual schedule with him, too, and dropped that part-way thru the year, because he didn't really need that either. He was telling the teachers what it was time for, thank you very much and let's get to it, without a visual schedule. And now, at school they have specials every day but it's not set up like Monday is Art, Tuesday is Library, not like that, it rotates wierd, and he has it all perfectly well straightened out and will tell you what will happen the next day. They also have a slightly different schedule for early-out days and he can go right over to that when those days happen. He doesn't have a history of flipping out over transitions though.

Anyway, with the discrete trial, at the Judevine training I was taught how to do it at home, myself. So it definately isn't ABA, I mean I'm not trained in ABA. I've pulled out some of the techniques a few times, mostly when DS was younger, but he didn't need (and frankly was sort of bored with) the more intense table-time sort of stuff. Which means... if you go with her and she works with him, it would be beneficial for you to observe her so that you can carry it over to home. I don't know how that would work with your schedule.

Having said that, if I could find someone experienced with kids on the spectrum who was willing to take my kids for a reasonable price... ABA or not... I'd jump right on it!

 

[DisDreaminMom]

Oddly enough, I had a ton of responses from seemingly qualified people who were either in school or were already Special Ed types. I guess the market is just that bad right now, and it's easy hours for a student. Still, lot's of women are majoring in ASD focused things right now. I'll interview a few of them and let you know what happens.

I really need Frauline Maria von Trapp. She had really good command of her kids and she played the guitar! My DD's best friend is a Trapp, like a distant cousin of the real von Trapp family. I always tell her she should go on the road...

 

[bookwormde]

I am always very skeptical about ABA since in the vast majority of cases it is done so “poorly”. To have long term benefits is must be used as an analytical tool to identify skill deficits and then a skills curriculum must be developed to meet the child’s need. When it is used as a behavior modification technique it is for all practical purposed not generalizable so except in modifying damaging or otherwise critical behaviors it has only minimal transient value, particularly for higher functioning children.

In the simplest terms if the therapist spends all the time talking about modifying behaviors, run away as fast as you can. If the therapist talks about analyzing behaviors and associated skill deficits and creating a skill development program (something like the skill steaming program) then the therapist may be a “keeper”



bookwormde

 

[mechurchlady]

I got me a real fast scooter but I need a ramp or something to get it into and out of the car and it does not fit well in my car. Hugs everyone and as for ABA no help from me as I am not sure about taht stuff.

Calvin is such a sweetie.

Hugs
Laurie