Bar Mitzvah Gift?

[cybrkitn]

DH and I have been invited to the Bar Mitzvah of a co-worker of his. It's not until June, but not having ever attended one before, we don't know what type of gift to get. Anyone have any ideas? Thanks!

 

[damone]

Usually a check is adequate. Either that or a bond. $18 if it's not someone you're very close with is fine. $50 if you're closer.

 

[cybrkitn]

Thanks for the help.

 

[golfgal]

If you are going to give money, keep it in multiples of $18-which is good luck.

 

[damone]

If you are going to give money, keep it in multiples of $18-which is good luck.

Yup.

99% of the gifts people get from Bar/Bat Mitzvah's are checks or savings bonds.

 

[MAH4546]

Usually a check is adequate. Either that or a bond. $18 if it's not someone you're very close with is fine. $50 if you're closer.

$54. Keep it in multiples of $18.

And honestly, even if I wasn't close to them, I'd do $36. I couldn't imagine giving $18 for a Bar Mitsvah.

 

[Cindy B]

Yes $36 is a good "base number". This is the season so to speak.. my daughter is having all her spring Saturdays taken up by bar/bat mitzvahs.

Remember if you go to the service, no bare shoulders on dresses. If you have a son, he should wear one of the provided yarmulke (sp?) to cover his head during the service. According to my daughter the prayer books are "backwards" so it isn't the usual left to right.

I realized you were talking about adults, one of my daughters invites had sort of a "temple rules" etiquette inserted in the invitation.. It said no bare shoulders and modest dress for women, yalmulkes for young men and prayer shawls for men (not sure what a non Jewish grown men would wear!)

Check to see if it is black tie. It may be. My daughter has been invited to two black tie ones and we saw parents/guests in tuxedoes and gowns at the temple and at the party site.

If you are two adults going, MINIMUM of a multiple of 18 x 2 guests. For example one time both of my kids were invited so I gave 36 x 2= 72.

 

[cybrkitn]

Thanks everyone! I had no idea about the numbers.

CindyB, thanks for the additional info. I just got off the phone with DH and was told that our son is invited. He's going to check with his co-worker to find out about the dress and the etiquette so that we don't embarrass ourselves.

Btw, DH's co-worker is also a former co-worker of mine as well from a previous job.

 

[mjkacmom]

My whole family was invited to dd13's friend's bat mitzva, so we gave a lot more, but most of her friends (not knowing about the 18 thing like we did) gave $50 as individuals (here in NE NJ).