This Pirate walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender notices he has a steering wheel on his crotch. The bartender hands over the beer and says "hey, is that a steering wheel on your crotch?" The pirate says "Aarrrr...yes, and it's driving me nuts".
Two flies meet on a fresh piece of dog feces for lunch...half way through lunch, one of the fly's "breaks wind"...The other fly looks up at him and says "HEY PAL!... DO YOU MIND!...I"M EATIN' HERE!"
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