Backfired!

[f.chadw]

I have been trying to get my in laws to go to Disney with us for over 15 years. Now, because of my wonderful BIL wanting to go, they have decided since HE and his family want to go, that we should all go as a large group and stay at a timeshare that he can trade with. It's next to Sea World! I'm not too sure that I can stay sane being with them for that long. I'm trying to convince my wife that we should stay at the Fort or something so we can get some "away" time.
I am pretty sure the constant comments of how much everything costs is going to make me want to pull my hair out!
I guess I should have never tried to get them to go. Now I'm kind of obligated since I've been trying for so long.
Uggggh! I'm dreading the day.
Just needed to vent. Thanks.

 

[jdcri]

Go and stay at a different hotel!!

 

[*Fantasia*]

MY OPINION... I don't think your family is obligated to stay with them, at least not for the whole duration of the trip. Are you guys doing Sea World and other attractions besides Disney? I would stay with them for as long as it's outside attraction of Disney. Then when it comes to Disney time, I would do the on-site. Let your BIL that you will get your own separate place to stay when doing Disney. Let them know that you want to do EMH and you want to take advantage of the transportation. And just let them know that it wouldn't be "magical" FOR YOUR FAMILY if you didn't stay on property. Just let them know that's how you guys roll. Just let them know that you guys are die hard Disney fanatics, maybe they will understand why staying on property is very important to you guys.

You guys can just find a meeting place at the park. You guys don't have to necessarily have to be together all the time. Maybe you guys can just have lunch or dinner together at the park. Or maybe do a couple of rides together because not everyone may not want to ride the same ride.

Good luck.. let us know what happened.

EDIT TO ADD: This trip is just as much as yours..

 

[Shmily1]

Oh, I think I would definitely find me somewhere to stay on-site. The idea of staying that close isn't good. I tried to tell my friend at work that but she said they had found a huge house to rent... blah... it would be fun and had it's own pool...blah... they came back telling about how they didn't get to do what they wanted, didn't get to see much, had two big family blow-ups, and the children were all arguing. I'm thinking she'll do the hotel thing next time!

Good luck to you and your family on the trip.

 

[wdw4rfam]

Trust me, stay in a different hotel. We went with my sis and her fam, and parents. We stayed on property, and had 3 rooms in a row. BIG mistake.......they were constantly pounding on our door wanting to visit (when we spent all day with them), and knocking on our door all morning asking if we were ready to go yet. It went on and on.....I said next time, seperate hotels!!!

 

[disneydee6]

For me anyways, it is completely acceptable to stay at a different resort than other family. Esp if you include all the benefits that come with staying IN disney, so hopefully that will help your argument. Most people only get vacation once a year, so why not get the vacay YOU want? And that way you and your immediate family can get some alone time?

 

[jrtoastyman]

Yeah, if there's a way to do it gracefully, staying elsewhere would be the best play. That actually applies regardless of whether or not you're staying by Seaworld or on site -- that is a LOT of time to spend in close quarters with the same group of people. Might not be feasible, of course -- particularly if they are volunteering to cover everyone's lodging with their timeshare -- but if you can swing it, that would be my move.

Besides, it sounds like you might need some privacy to vent from time to time during the trip.

 

[CoachBagFanatic]

Trust me, stay in a different hotel. We went with my sis and her fam, and parents. We stayed on property, and had 3 rooms in a row. BIG mistake.......they were constantly pounding on our door wanting to visit (when we spent all day with them), and knocking on our door all morning asking if we were ready to go yet. It went on and on.....I said next time, seperate hotels!!!

Oh your post brought back so many memories of our 1999 trip to Disney. Big mistake is right. We had 16 people and I wanted to pull my hair out after 2 days. Never again and we never did.

OP I agree with the others, try to find a way to stay at another resort. If you think you need venting now and you all stay together, you will find a new definition for the word venting. Best of luck to you and I hope you are able to find a solution.

 

[softballmom3]

Your post gave me anxiety LOL! I imagined our family doing the same and I know I would gracefully stay onsite and agree to meet up with them. There are usually creative ways to say things without hurting someone's feelings . and if there isn't better to do it now than be miserable to whole time you are there. I am a firm believer in everyone needing space .

 

[julluvsdisney]

ugggg I feel your pain! My MIL invited us last month to go to thier timeshare in celebration but I told her sorry we already had a trip booked(we try to not tell some people until its too late to join us) ! So then she says "oh when? We (her and my FIL) will go with you " (UMMMM who invited you?) so I reluctantly said "ummm ok" (thinking like most things its just an empty idea she was having) fast forward a few weeks later she cant book her timeshare that week (YAY) so she says "well maybe we will just stay where you guys are staying" so I look up the cost and its 2093 at POR with FD she is cheap so I figured she wouldnt do it but she shocks me and books it! and already she is complaining on how expensive it is costing how she doesnt want to do disney all day everyday. Going into it we told her we stay on property we dont leave once we are there we go from rope drop to the goodnight kiss we ride everything! She was warned!! She is a major complainer hates rides hates the heat hates walking alot and is cheap as they come! Disney is not the place for her! I can already hear the complaining "its too hot" "the food wasnt worth that much "(yes she would say this after seeing the price knowing she got free dining) "all I did was sit on a bench while everyone had fun riding rides" "I dont want to go to a park today I want to sit at the pool"(if we say ok we will meet up with you later she will later complain "I was all alone today at the pool") There is no winning! So I feel your pain! This trip was supposed to be for my bday but Im betting she ruins it! Sorry for the long vent!! I hope we both have a better trip than we are anticipating!!

 

[mkoerner]

Save yourself!! Stay onsite. There is such a thing as too much togetherness.

 

[Cynt]

julluvsdisney - OMG!! Get rid of her!! That would drive me crazy! Girl if there's a way to switch your hotel w/out incurring add'l expenses. I would do it!!! LOL!! If its not too late do not book the same flights. So you can arrive before or after her and have a snaffu/mistake/upgrade etc. to another hotel. Sending pixie dust your way.

OP - DON'T DO IT!! Man up and take your family to another hotel. It will be sooo worth being the "bad guy" in this scenario.

Thanks everybody for this thread. Our annual trip is next summer. You have just verified what I thought all along seperate quarters for everyone. We started let's get a big house. Nope I don't think I want to be in a house w/ you my whole vacation. Let's get a big 3/4 bdrm condo or 2 two bdrm condos outside of Disney. Ok good idea but I don't know. Now I'm back to 4 values so each family can have their own space. And we're all checking in seperately so the rooms can be spread out. We love each other but 4 siblings w/ their families is a lot of people in one house or close quarters.

 

[KELLY]

ugggg I feel your pain! My MIL invited us last month to go to thier timeshare in celebration but I told her sorry we already had a trip booked(we try to not tell some people until its too late to join us) ! So then she says "oh when? We (her and my FIL) will go with you " (UMMMM who invited you?) so I reluctantly said "ummm ok" (thinking like most things its just an empty idea she was having) fast forward a few weeks later she cant book her timeshare that week (YAY) so she says "well maybe we will just stay where you guys are staying" so I look up the cost and its 2093 at POR with FD she is cheap so I figured she wouldnt do it but she shocks me and books it! and already she is complaining on how expensive it is costing how she doesnt want to do disney all day everyday. Going into it we told her we stay on property we dont leave once we are there we go from rope drop to the goodnight kiss we ride everything! She was warned!! She is a major complainer hates rides hates the heat hates walking alot and is cheap as they come! Disney is not the place for her! I can already hear the complaining "its too hot" "the food wasnt worth that much "(yes she would say this after seeing the price knowing she got free dining) "all I did was sit on a bench while everyone had fun riding rides" "I dont want to go to a park today I want to sit at the pool"(if we say ok we will meet up with you later she will later complain "I was all alone today at the pool") There is no winning! So I feel your pain! This trip was supposed to be for my bday but Im betting she ruins it! Sorry for the long vent!! I hope we both have a better trip than we are anticipating!!

You poor thing.

 

[disnut8]

I have been trying to get my in laws to go to Disney with us for over 15 years. Now, because of my wonderful BIL wanting to go, they have decided since HE and his family want to go, that we should all go as a large group and stay at a timeshare that he can trade with. It's next to Sea World! I'm not too sure that I can stay sane being with them for that long. I'm trying to convince my wife that we should stay at the Fort or something so we can get some "away" time.
I am pretty sure the constant comments of how much everything costs is going to make me want to pull my hair out!
I guess I should have never tried to get them to go. Now I'm kind of obligated since I've been trying for so long.
Uggggh! I'm dreading the day.
Just needed to vent. Thanks.

I did the whole "family staying offsite and all together" thing once. There are a few things to consider here and I hope you have addressed them. First of all, since you are staying offsite, how are you getting to the parks? If it's a big group, you will need multiple vehicles and if you don't have annual passes, you will have to pay the parking fees each day. That's something to mention. Get all that out now. Have a savings fund for the incidentals that you won't get by staying onsite.

But if you are stuck staying offsite with the rest of your family, just enjoy what you can. You can choose your friends but you can't choose your family and there's really no reason to be the "witch" on the trip. Do your own thing, have your own vehicle, and meet up with people when you can.

On the "family staying offsite and all together" trip, I resented my father-in-law wanting everyone to tour together. He passed last year and I miss him almost every day. My dad was able to walk and now he's in a wheelchair. Relish what you have.

 

[rock_doctor]

Tell them that it is great that they are going and you think they will enjoy staying at the timeshare. But if you are going you must have some family time at night and will be staying at the fort. Just say it as a matter of fact. "We will be staying at the Fort." If they comment about the cost just tell them you plan to save some money by sneaking into Sea World and doing some fishing. Seriously, it is a short drive from Sea World to the Fort. No reason you can commute back and forth. We are a Disney family, not uncommon to come across a cousin when at Disney but even then we only visit for a couple hours and then go our separate ways.

 

[noahdove]

Oh my mercy, find another resort to stay at even if you have to change it to get away from them. I am sorry, but, it will be a nightmare if you all stay together. Plan a dinner or part of a park to do with them and stick to your plan. My mother went with my and my younger daughter years ago, my dad paid for her part of the trip as a Christmas gift, and lets just say......she said the NEXT time she was going to see "something"!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I went out of my way to treat her to special things, rented a car, special meals, even Cypress Gardens..she was NOT happy no matter what..Don't make a mistake and stay with them..Enjoy your time

 

[a1tinkfans]

I have been trying to get my in laws to go to Disney with us for over 15 years. Now, because of my wonderful BIL wanting to go, they have decided since HE and his family want to go, that we should all go as a large group and stay at a timeshare that he can trade with. It's next to Sea World! I'm not too sure that I can stay sane being with them for that long. I'm trying to convince my wife that we should stay at the Fort or something so we can get some "away" time.
I am pretty sure the constant comments of how much everything costs is going to make me want to pull my hair out!
I guess I should have never tried to get them to go. Now I'm kind of obligated since I've been trying for so long.
Uggggh! I'm dreading the day.
Just needed to vent. Thanks.

not sure whether to laugh or cry so it seems....Its great to go as a family for some "bonding time" but WHY do you have to spend your entire time with them. d easily have no issue staying with them first...Then after XX days, go to the resort of your choice and UNwind from all the angst that you are anticipating ...Its your family's vacation too. so ENJOY it...
Best of Luck, maybe you'll find that it wont be so bad after all , hope so

 

[GaSleepingBeautyFan]

Just stay at the Fort and even book a meal or two with just your family. I hope your wife agrees to stay there. It will be more enjoyable for you.

Then you can let the Inlaws know that you already have somewhere else booked and ignore them when they complain about it.

All you will have to do then is to decide how much time you want to spend with them. Depending on how long your vacation is, it could work out well for you.

Good luck!

 

[ARAITHEL]

I planned a whole vacation for my MIL, SIL, myself, my DD, and my niece and nephew.

We are staying in two separate rooms at POR.

We have already discussed the fact that we don't ALL have to be together at all times...they have agreed. I'm hoping thatwe don't have to deal with somebody wanting to stay at the pool...and then complain about because they are alone. I go to the parks alone!

I've never been with in laws before. Always with MY extended family...god help me.

 

[ldo]

from SW to the Fort is under 15 minutes! If you take Palm Parkway and cross over 535 (?) and keep going and then turn left, etc. you can be at the Fort in under 15 minutes. We just did this multiple times at Easter with super packed traffic elsewhere, but maybe 10 cars total at peak on this road. We had a 2 BR @ Hilton Grand Vacation Club at Seaworld (super nice) and put my parents, my younger kids and my Brother/ SIl and their kids @ SW and us at WDW. It worked GREAT! We ate dinners at condo @ SW and one night we all even went over to the Fort and roasted hot bogs and marshmellows. The Fort is a great option with the Sw area---you wouldn't think so, but Palm parkway makes it really easy. We liked it so much, we are planning a similar thing next year.