Baby wants.....

[monorailsilver]

I am 37, with 3 kids (8, 5 & 3) & have my tubal. I still have baby twinges.

I held a 5 day old baby 2 weeks ago & was in love. I wanted another one.

So the baby twinges are still there for me but I know I am done.

And for each one of them we felt poorer & poorer but we make do. Our kids are happy, healthy (one has food allergies) & well behaved (when not with us).

So if you feel ready to have kids, give it a go.

 

[ChrizJen]

It's always been my opinion that if you wait until things seem just right to have a baby, you'll never have a baby. If you and your DH know for sure that you want to have a baby, let it happen when it happens. I agree with others who say that this is one of those things that you can't always plan out...

 

[GoldieSaysMeep]

Kind of unrelated, but I'm a woman in my mid 30's who has never had baby fever, never liked babies or children a whole lot and pretty much knew from age 9 that I wanted to get my tubes tied (which I did as soon as I was old enough and found a doctor willing) and never reproduce.

What would cause this? I mean, since it's biological to have "baby fever", what would biologically cause a healthy, normal woman to not want babies and dislike being around children? When I say I have no maternal instinct, I mean NONE whatsoever.

Does anyone know if it's hormonal, part of the brain not working as it should be wired to?

 

[NHdisneylover]

Kind of unrelated, but I'm a woman in my mid 30's who has never had baby fever, never liked babies or children a whole lot and pretty much knew from age 9 that I wanted to get my tubes tied (which I did as soon as I was old enough and found a doctor willing) and never reproduce.

What would cause this? I mean, since it's biological to have "baby fever", what would biologically cause a healthy, normal woman to not want babies and dislike being around children? When I say I have no maternal instinct, I mean NONE whatsoever.

Does anyone know if it's hormonal, part of the brain not working as it should be wired to?

Hi. I don't have an answer for you, but I wanted to tell you you are not entierly abnormal either. I think most women are biologically programmed to want babies and to really want them at a certain age. BUT everyone is different. Most people seem to be biologically programmed to be rigth handed but some are programmed to be left handed and that is not better or worse, only different. My DSiL does not want and never has wanted children (she is in her 40s now). She is the greatest aunt kids could ever ask for (once they are past toddlerhood anyway) and my kids adore her. BUT she has no maternal urge to have kids of her own and she has NEVER been even comfortable (much less happy) around babies or toddlers. It is just how she is and how you are and that is still part of normal (just not as common)

 

[december]

I agree with the pp-we are all just different! My mother had 4 daughters, but really doesn't have the patience for babies and toddlers at all. She was shocked that I decided to have another baby, at 35, when I finally had mine big enough to "get off your lap, and get your life back." She doesn't understand that I love the baby stage. My oldest sister, who is 46, never could have kids. I don't think it bothers her at all. She did pursue it for awhile, but both she and her husband had problems. I even offered to be a surrogate, but she wasn't interested. My younger sister, almost 32, never really cared to hold or play with little ones. She has one son, and says she never feels the urge to have another. My 2nd older sister, 44, and I were always the ones carrying babies around, taking care of the nursery at church and Bible school, and making plans for having babies one day. But even her mothering style is VERY different from mine. Quite a wide range of emotions for one family! I don't think any of our maternal responses are weird, though. Just different!

 

[robinb]

OP, you are still quite young and starting your life together with your DH. According to your signature, you have just celebrated your 1st anniversary. I would recommend that you spend some more "couple time" together ... especially since your DH does not seem to be on the same page .

Like others on this thread, I never wanted kids in my 20's and didn't start to get anything resembling "baby fever" until I was in my mid-30's. Even then it wasn't a fever but more of a feeling that my family was incomplete without a child.