Baby Shower ideas needed

[sbpebbles]

Ok my BFF is having her 4th child..she's had baby showers with each child..however, long story short, she only has one child with her now..one has passed away...So she want to keep this baby shower cheap..Her youngest is little over 2 years old and this one is again another girl..she didn't get rid of much of her baby stuff from her youngest..She's never played any games at her showers so she wants to do that this time..I only had a baby shower with my oldest and that was over 8 years ago so I don't even remember the games we played..If anyone has any ideas please let me know..Also I'm looking for ways to keep the cost of this baby shower down..I figure we can send E invites out vs sending them out in the mail..We'd just get a sheet cake from the grocery store and get deli items...She plans on doing this in the middle of March since she's due in April but will probably have her child sooner..She plans on doing it at her house, she lives in a mobile home so we don't have to worry about renting a space..I'm sure we can get some cheap decorations from 50/50 Factory Outlet store..Since this is her FOURTH, I'm having a hard time justifying buying yet another gift..Would it be tacky if I told her my gift to her is helping her out with this baby shower? I really can't afford to go out and spend a lot on her..She already has a lot of the stuff she needs..Maybe I could get her a pack of diapers? I'd appreciate any and all responses..Thank you!

 

[riley2008]

Tough situation to be in. I recently attended a shower for someone having their fourth child also, with the youngest being less than 2 and the same sex as the new arrival. I was not happy about attending, but went do to the work relationship. However, in this case the mother and father did not give the shower themselves! Also, it ended up being more of a reason just to get together with kids and families, so this one really turned out fun. We gave diapers.

How about a "Pamper Pounding" or "Diapers and Desserts"?

Good Luck!

 

[hffmnheidi]

I've done a ton of baby showers for co-workers, friends, and family over the years. Some of my favorites were the two I listed below because they allow everyone to be creative.

You could have a "Blankets and Diapers" Shower. Everyone brings a blanket and a pack of diapers. People will choose all kinds of fun blankets from light-weight summer ones to those that will be needed later in the year(fall/winter).

What about a clock baby shower...each invitee is assigned a time of the day and brings a gift that corresponds to the time and it helps prevent multiples of the same item. And make sure people know that there is a price cap of $40.00 so it prevents people from going overboard. Make sure everyone knows their time and you might have to include an explanation of what the shower is about. Examples...list the time/event at that time of day

8 am(breakfast) bottles, formula, bowls, spoons, bibs
9 am(bathtime) tub, diapers, soap, lotions, outfits, towels
2 pm(naptime) blankets, pacifiers, stuffed animal
4 pm(playtime) toys, books, kids music cds

Games...
-word search of baby words(can easily do this on the computer and print them out)...super cheap/fun/easy for everyone
-mixed up baby words...again super cheap to do on the computer and print out at home
-baby item shoppers list...get a baby catalog and ask everyone to estimate the cost of each item...those who get closest to the price win a prize

**prizes can be bought at the Dollar stores for cheap-kitchen towels/candles/notepads/ect...

I think in this situation since you are throwing the shower and doing all the work to put it together as well as your gas running to get everything together, a pack of diapers and a nice card would be a perfectly acceptable gift. Diapers are expensive and go fast, so any mom to be would love to have plenty of diapers.

What about those who don't have access to a computer or email if you're doing e-vites? I'm sure you don't want to offend anyone. You could do an invitation on your computer, print it off, and just buy plain envelopes at Michaels or Hobby Lobby.

Buy a cake at Walmart and they can add any message for the baby shower for you. What about doing snackie foods instead of a meal? Chips/dip, crackers/cheeses/salami...most baby showers are just about the getting together and not so much about the food. Don't forget ice for the drinks. Make your own ahead of time and put it in freezer bags-cheap and free.

 

[alexedan]

A couple of frozen casseroles for after the baby is born would be a nice gift also.

 

[disneychic2]

Am I missing something? Why is there a shower for a 4th baby? That just seems greedy to me, especially in view of the fact that she is giving it for herself. She wants to be really cheap with everything, but expects everyone to pony up a nice gift. I hope this doesn't sound heartless, but how many times does she expect people to subsidize her babies? I'm very sorry for her loss, no one should have to go through that, but a 4th baby shower is just a little much imo. As for your part, op, you are being more than generous helping her out with this and a pack of diapers is more than enough. Cudos to you for helping her!

 

[musicluvr40]

Games - I played a fun game at the last shower I went to. Fill a bowl with two boxes of uncooked rice. Dump 100 safety pins - medium size and make sure they are closed - into the uncooked rice. You pass the bowl around, the person closes their eyes, and tries to pull out as many pins as they can in one minute. It sounds easy, but somehow, everything feels the same.

Cheap game, complete blast!

Also, my sister is having her third boy in another 8 weeks. I am throwing her a "welcome baby" party about a month after the baby is born. I am making her a diaper cake - if you look on the internet, you can see tons of designs. You basically use disposable diapers to make a tiered "cake", and you can decorate with all kinds of stuff. Another shower I went to the cake was part of the game - they walked around with the cake, you had to look at all the stuff on it, they put it away, and then you had to list what was on the cake.

Gives you a practical nice gift and game all in one.

Everyone has their own opinion about showers. It's nice that you are willing to do this for her.

 

[quentina]

I think this is tacky........I have tons of friends who have multiple children. We have been known to meet at Panera and her closest friends bring a small gift. I am having a hard time wrapping my arms around an official shower but...maybe it is just me.

 

[pearlieq]

This might not be exactly what you were looking for, but here's the best advice I have:

Friends don't let friends behave badly and make fools of themselves.

You just don't throw yourself a baby shower. Especially not for a 4th baby when the last baby was born recently and even of the same gender. You don't.

If I ever have a lapse in judgment like that I would hope my friends would be the ones who would step up and lovingly set me straight.

Maybe you could have a talk with her and explain why this isn't a great idea. You could encourage her to plan a "meet the baby" party so that everyone could still come by and socialize with the new addition without it being a tacky gift-grub.

 

[BC Disney Lover]

Another easy game you can do is: Baby Names A-Z. Just list the alphabet with a line beside it and the first person to have a name for each letter wins.

 

[deezeealum]

This might not be exactly what you were looking for, but here's the best advice I have:

Friends don't let friends behave badly and make fools of themselves.

You just don't throw yourself a baby shower. Especially not for a 4th baby when the last baby was born recently and even of the same gender. You don't.

If I ever have a lapse in judgment like that I would hope my friends would be the ones who would step up and lovingly set me straight.

Maybe you could have a talk with her and explain why this isn't a great idea. You could encourage her to plan a "meet the baby" party so that everyone could still come by and socialize with the new addition without it being a tacky gift-grub.

 

[sarahlovesmickey]

Gosh, now I feel bad posting about the fact that my mom is throwing me a baby shower.This is my 5th child, but my 1st and ONLY baby shower was 10 years ago when I had my oldest son. I kept everything from that shower, but after my 4th, I thought I was done having children, so I donated everything to friends or charities. I am remarried and am due with my 5th child in March--a lil girl. =) Is this tacky??? I am looking for honest answers---I honestly didn't think it was, but now I see what people are saying.... *sigh*

 

[hffmnheidi]

I certainly don't think it's tacky because you've had 10 years between baby showers.

 

[pearlieq]

Gosh, now I feel bad posting about the fact that my mom is throwing me a baby shower.This is my 5th child, but my 1st and ONLY baby shower was 10 years ago when I had my oldest son. I kept everything from that shower, but after my 4th, I thought I was done having children, so I donated everything to friends or charities. I am remarried and am due with my 5th child in March--a lil girl. =) Is this tacky??? I am looking for honest answers---I honestly didn't think it was, but now I see what people are saying.... *sigh*

People might take exception to:

1.) This is your 5th child.
2.) You've already had a baby shower in your life
3.) The shower is being thrown by your mother

People might give you a pass because:

1.) There is been a long interval between babies
2.) The new baby is of a different gender
3.) Because you have been remarried and it's been 10 years since you've had a shower, it's likely going to be a different crowd than was at your first shower.


If we were friends I got an invitation to your shower I probably wouldn't find it tacky, given your situation. There may be a couple things that ostensibly go against the letter of the law, but I don't think you're violating the spirit of it.

Etiquette rules aren't supposed to be about playing "gotcha" or tsk-tsking at people for technical violations. They're about being considerate and making sure we don't impose on each other.

Someone having a shower for every single baby, with the same crowd, and within a short time frame is putting a burden on their friends. Someone having a shower for a new baby with a new family when there has been a long interval between showers isn't, in my opinion.

 

[njmom47]

I have no opinion really, just wanted to say I had 1 baby shower for my first dd that was thrown by my coworkers, held AT our workplace. My family did not even attend.
My ds is from my 2nd marriage, new family, dh's only child, and I didn't have a shower for him.
I do like the idea of "meet the baby" get-together though!

 

[sarahlovesmickey]

Etiquette rules aren't supposed to be about playing "gotcha" or tsk-tsking at people for technical violations. They're about being considerate and making sure we don't impose on each other.

Yeah, my mom and good friend are throwing it. I only know about it actually because my mom was trying to plan it around my work schedule and a couple other events. I am an independent consultant for a company and she wanted to make sure I didn't book a party on that date. I certainly don't want my friends thinking I'm tacky and I DEFINITELY don't want to burden them. I also thought I was in the "clear" because it has been so long and this baby is lil girl, but this post really got me thinking and hoping that my friends and family don't think the event is tacky. Thank you for your honest opinion---it's good to get feedback.

 

[sarahlovesmickey]

gosh, now I'm feeling tacky because I have totally hi-jacked the original post...sorry....lets get back to helping her. LOL!

 

[sbpebbles]

thank you everyone for your replies..I've gotten some good ideas..if you have any more please send them to me..I plan on going to see her tomorrow and want to run these by her..I'm really liking the Diapers and Deserts Idea..She's having it in the afternoon from 2-4 so I think deserts would work wonderfully. I know the consensus is that what she's doing is tacky..well it is what it is, would it be even more tacky if we tell ppl we are doing something as diapers n deserts? we all know how a new mom can use diapers so I think that would help her out the most..so far she has not had a good response, she posted an announcement online, so i don't think it'll be many ppl..

 

[mjkacmom]

could you politely tell her why the poor response? I certainly hope she didn't register. You just don't hold showers for yourself - ever. I actually did have a small shower thrown for me when I was pregnant with my twins (ie - happy accidents). It was a total surprise, and I got diapers, wipes, and my friend gave me her old triple stroller (because I had a one year old at the time). Please suggest that she have a meet the baby gathering after - people will bring gifts for the baby, and it won't be seen as such a gift grab.

 

[tlh0726]

gosh, now I'm feeling tacky because I have totally hi-jacked the original post...sorry....lets get back to helping her. LOL!

going to hi-jack it one more time.

Just wanted to say March 22nd is a good day to have a baby. That is my youngest DS birthday!!

 

[tinkerbelletreasure]

Wow...I must live in a totally tacky part of the world..cause I have been to lots of baby showers for second, third, and fourth babies. They are just as special as the first one! I'll admit my standard gift at one of these is a new outfit. That way everything the baby has isn't hand me downs.
These days when having babies includes so much accessorizing, I know a lot of people don't want the same "theme" from baby to baby.
I'm pregnant with 3rd child. My youngest will be 4 when when this one is born. I was really lucky in that I did hold on to most of my baby gear, and when I register, it won't be for items I already have...but gosh, baby gear evolves so quickly! And most of the time child seats can't be used from one to the next because of how long the first one stays in them....I won't be throwing my own baby shower, but I would be very suprised if my work and even possibly my mother in law don't throw small "Sprinkles" as we call scaled down showers here.