At what age did you start leaving your child home alone?

[IDoDis]

There was a tragedy with a neighborhood family a couple of years ago. A 9 year old DD and 6 year old DD were home alone while their mom made a quick trip to the grocery store to pick up a missing ingredient she needed for dinner. The 6 year old choked on a grape. The 9 year old did not know that her sister was choking, but knew something was wrong. She called her mom's cell and the frantic mom figured out the 6 year old must be choking. She told the 9 year old how to do a Heimlich Maneuver, but the 9 year old was hysterical and she could not lift up her sister. The mom was screaming in the store. Someone in the store called 911 and had to get the address from the mom. Several minutes had elapsed until the paramedics arrived. The grape was dislodged, but the little girl ended up in a coma and on life support. The family stopped the life support a week later. It was so sad.

If you leave an older sibling with a younger sibling or your 10 year old starts babysitting, make sure they take a CPR course!

 

[NHdisneylover]

If you leave an older sibling with a younger sibling or your 10 year old starts babysitting, make sure they take a CPR course!

Very good advice. DD12 is both CPR and first aide certified. DS10 is not as we could not find a class which would let him take it under 10 and now we can not find one in English (recently moved to Germany)--but we have covered the material with him as best we can on our own (he does not babysit). All caregivers should have this information (parents included)

 

[emer95]

There was a tragedy with a neighborhood family a couple of years ago. A 9 year old DD and 6 year old DD were home alone while their mom made a quick trip to the grocery store to pick up a missing ingredient she needed for dinner. The 6 year old choked on a grape. The 9 year old did not know that her sister was choking, but knew something was wrong. She called her mom's cell and the frantic mom figured out the 6 year old must be choking. She told the 9 year old how to do a Heimlich Maneuver, but the 9 year old was hysterical and she could not lift up her sister. The mom was screaming in the store. Someone in the store called 911 and had to get the address from the mom. Several minutes had elapsed until the paramedics arrived. The grape was dislodged, but the little girl ended up in a coma and on life support. The family stopped the life support a week later. It was so sad.

If you leave an older sibling with a younger sibling or your 10 year old starts babysitting, make sure they take a CPR course!

Oh my goodness... that just made tears instantly come to my eyes. That poor 9 year old will never forget that as long as she lives. God bless her.

Our kids are 9 and 10 and we just started leaving them for 30 minutes at a time. I go for runs in the neighborhood and I bring my cell phone with me. I have also gone to pick up pizza at a shop that is literally a two minute drive from my house.

American Girl books have a great one about staying home alone, and we've read it with our kids.

 

[teacups]

Yes it depends on the kid... and if the kid wants to do it. My oldest wanted to from about 9 (for about half an hour) and my middle is 10 and has zero interest in it. My youngest is 7 and I'm sure he'll be 20 before I can leave him alone.

 

[lemondog]

You should be aware that many states have laws governing at what age a child can be left alone. You should check your state's law, unless you want some child protective services agent knocking on your door. The general consensus in state law is 12 years old and some states mandate a child must be as old as 14. You can look here:

http://www.latchkey-kids.com/latchkey-kids-age-limits.htm

I personally think anyone who leaves an 8 year old is *nuts*.

Wow, there are very few states that have true laws. Some have suggested ages, but they are not legally binding. Most have no minimum age at all. That said, if someone is foolish enough to leave a toddler or preschooler alone they will obviously go to jail for child endangerment.

I have a 3rd grader, she is 8 years old. I feel like she would be perfectly fine BY HERSELF for 30 minutes or less. However, I also have 5yo twins and no way is she capable of "babysitting" them. I think when she is around 10 and they are 7/8 we will start thinking about letting her stay with them for short stints (like grocery, errands, etc.) but not truly watching them at night until she is 12 or so.

 

[Ohiodislover]

Mine both started for short periods-an hour tops at 9. They have been staying alone after school, and during summer since my youngest was 8, and oldest 12. After school it was only for 1-1/2 hours. During the summer, they would be at home from 9-1, and then 2 till around 5:30/6:00.

Starting last summer they were able to go to the pool by themselves (per pool rules) and it is only a 2-3 minute walk from our front door. They would call, and talk to DH and I while they walked. They both have cell phones. It worked out very nicely.

My oldest took a fairly extensive babysitting training thru church, as well as first aid/CPR thru the redcross. She has been babysitting outside our home since she turned 13. She actually makes A LOT of $$- well a lot to a 14 Y.O. She made over $100 last week.

My youngest is 10 now. She sometimes prefers to stay by herself, but not for very long. She is a much more nervous one than my oldest, so we don't push it.

The latest we have let them stay home by themselves is about 12AM. It is nice to have a grown up dinner every now and then.

 

[quentina]

Those poor kids!

He's a great babysitter, my kids LOVE him.

 

[PatsGirl]

I would ask the kids, if they don't feel comfortable, don't do it. Mine are honest with me. My DD10 doesn't mind 30-60 minutes, but anything longer makes her nervous. She gets really quiet when I suggest it and I know she doesn't want to, and I consider her very mature compared to most of her friends!

Sounds like my DD I've been trying to patiently wean her to stay home alone for longer than 30 minutes at a time but she is very resistent. I guess I was spoiled because her brother was adamant he did not need a sitter by the time he was 10. He started staying home at night for a few hours and for many hours during the day when he was about 12. She on the other hand is 12 1/2 and when I was late getting home recently and it started getting dusk she called her grandmother 10 miles away and ratted me out When I got home about 30 minutes later, there was DM and DD with their arms crossed sitting on the couch together just waiting to pounce

 

[aprilgail2]

You should be aware that many states have laws governing at what age a child can be left alone. You should check your state's law, unless you want some child protective services agent knocking on your door. The general consensus in state law is 12 years old and some states mandate a child must be as old as 14. You can look here:



I personally think anyone who leaves an 8 year old is *nuts*.

14?? Thats nuts- my daughter will be in 10th grade at 14!! I can't imagine telling my high schooler-"sorry you can't stay home alone" LOL. By 12 I was babysitting for 4 other kids until 3am on the weekends!
My daughter has been staying home since she was 8 for short runs.

 

[DISNEY1975]

14?? Thats nuts- my daughter will be in 10th grade at 14!! I can't imagine telling my high schooler-"sorry you can't stay home alone" LOL. By 12 I was babysitting for 4 other kids until 3am on the weekends!
My daughter has been staying home since she was 8 for short runs.

10th grade at 14? Thats unusual. My son is almost 16 and will be starting 10th grade in a few weeks.

I left my oldest home at 12 for a grocery store/CVS run. At 14, I would leave him for a few hours and days he didnt have school, I would leave him home alone......WITH RULES!!! Dont answer the phone/door, no friends, dont use the stove.

 

[golfgal]

14?? Thats nuts- my daughter will be in 10th grade at 14!! I can't imagine telling my high schooler-"sorry you can't stay home alone" LOL. By 12 I was babysitting for 4 other kids until 3am on the weekends!
My daughter has been staying home since she was 8 for short runs.

I agree-our 14 year olds will be in 9th grade and there is NO REASON they can't be home alone at this age. Heck, most kids I know started babysitting at age 11 or so.

 

[aprilgail2]

10th grade at 14? Thats unusual. My son is almost 16 and will be starting 10th grade in a few weeks.

I left my oldest home at 12 for a grocery store/CVS run. At 14, I would leave him for a few hours and days he didnt have school, I would leave him home alone......WITH RULES!!! Dont answer the phone/door, no friends, dont use the stove.

not unusual here- they can start kinder at 4 if they wil be 5 by December. At 16 the late birthday kids will be seniors!

 

[GothTink]

So funny thatt I should read this post today. My husband and I were just discussing yesterday how our Aspie son was 9 when he started staying home alone for about a half hour. By the time he was 12, he was babysitting his younger sister for up to three hours. Now he stays overnight by himself on occasion. Our daughter is finally old enough to start staying alone for a bit. Time flies!

 

[Feralpeg]

Most states have a legal age at which a child can be left alone. In Missouri, it was age 12. I never left my daughter alone until she was 12.

 

[mjkacmom]

Most states have a legal age at which a child can be left alone. In Missouri, it was age 12. I never left my daughter alone until she was 12.

Actually, only 14 do, and 8 of them range from 8 - 11. Your state doesn't have one, as well as mine.

 

[DVCLiz]

My older daughter was 14 in tenth grade - she had an October birthday and turned 15 six weeks into the school year. My younger daughter will turn 16 in tenth grade - she has a December birthday.

The older one was ready far sooner to stay alone - in early middle school. Her sister, on the other hand, was much more timid about staying alone, and it wasn't until high school that she really matured enough to be able to stay alone for an evening if I had a meeting, etc.

 

[PaulaSue]

Thanks for asking and the link. Dh and I were talking about this as I want to get a part time job. The hours he works don't make it easy for me to get a decent job and we were talking about how old the girls need to be for me to find work and they be alone for an hour or 2 sometimes if needed.

Anyone know what programs off babysitting courses beside Red Cross and books like the AG book mentioned?

 

[NHdisneylover]

I have seen staying home alone and babysitting courses offered at community centers, churches, schools and libararies (but I think they were ALL run by the Red Cross still).

 

[Luv2Scrap]

My son is 12 and has been staying home alone during the workday this summer. He's very comfortable with it (loves it, actually!), but my parents live four blocks away, my aunt a mile away, and we have two dogs that sound way scarier than they really are!

 

[2girlsmom]

It really is very individual to the child though, too. My 9 year old would be completely fine on her own, though she doesn't WANT to be left alone as she gets scared easily. My 11 year old would love to be left at home alone, but there's not a chance, she is adhd with impulse control issues which causes her to do things that could potentially be dangerous if unsupervised. I can completely understand why some of you don't let them stay alone until older if they are anything like her, and I am encouraged by the ones who said their children did finally grow into it.