So here are some questions I have--what time should we arrive at the ship==we are coming down a day earlier and staying at Marriott Grand Lakes in Orlando==they have a great pool area so figured we would stay there for a while on the 21st--is there anything to do onboard? meals/kids club etc. I think I have seen you should be on board by 3;45? Is there a best time to board?
Well, I believe All Aboard is 3:45pm, but I wouldn't recommend arriving at the last minute. It's well documented that the ship waits for no one. Boarding usually begins around noon and there is a wonderful Embarkation Lunch Buffet until around 2:30pm.
The best time to look around the ship is from noon until 3:45pm because it's the only time when every area of the ship is open (teen club, kids clubs, baby nursery, spa, etc.). After that, all those areas become restricted.
All the "fun stuff" opens at noon, also: Aqua Duck, putt-putt, pools, Mickey Slide, etc.
Some people prefer boarding as soon as they can, at noon. However, that is a very crowded time. A lot of people report that there is no wait to board the ship if you arrive anytime after 1pm.
do they provide shampoo etc. in the bathrooms?
Yes, Disney provides H2O products: soap, shampoo, conditioner, and lotion. Concierge cabins receive additional products.
I saw on Cruise Critic a thread about no shorts for dinners? is this really a big deal even for kids? No big deal but just more stuff to pack!
I believe
DCL prefers dressy casual dinner wear for the restaurants. I'm not saying you won't see any kids in shorts at dinner, but the preference is no shorts.
I see now they raised the height limit for the Aquaduck==which means my 7 year old grandson can't go alone--but do they have double tubes and could he ride with his 12 year old cousin? I have a fear of heights so won't work with me.
All the Aqua Duck tubes are meant to be for two riders at the same time. It's been reported that the more weight there is, the faster it goes!
As long as your grandson is at least 48", then he can definitely ride with anyone else, including his cousin.
Here is my best explanation of the Fish Extender Exchange:
Beside every cabin door is a large metal silver fish 
(or starfish or seahorse) with an indentation in the back for cruise personnel to leave information, invitations, etc. Teenagers receive invitations to Teen Club activities and we've also received "rebooking onboard" price quotes tucked in our fish.
DISboarders have taken the silver fish (starfish, seahorse) one step further... by creating hanging pockets (much like cloth letter holders) to hang from the fish (or starfish, or seahorse) - thus the name, "Fish Extender". The Fish Extenders (FEs) can be made of practically anything (cloth, plastic, paper gift bags, etc.), as long as they have at least one pocket that can hold surprises. My FE had always been just a plain canvas bag on which I'd added a tropical scene, the names of the Disney ships, and our names. But recently, a very sweet DISer surprised me with a beautiful "real" FE for this cruise!!! 
On each "Cruise Meets" thread (such as this 4-21-11 one) someone usually organizes a little gift exchange during the cruise. People sign up by giving their cabin number, names of everyone in their cabin, and ages of the kids so that everyone will know how many goodies to bring and where to deliver them. Some people give one gift per family, some people give a little gift to each person. It's totally up to the giver to decide what to give and when to give it during the cruise.
There are several threads on the main cruise boards that discuss ideas for FE gifts. Some gifts are from Dollar Stores, some are handmade, and some are bought in bulk from websites that sell trinkets like the Oriental Trading Company. Often, they are stickers, candy, glow sticks, lanyards, etc., with themes such as pirates, beach, cruise, tropical, hometown, holiday, etc. The main idea is just to have fun finding little goodies in your FE throughout the cruise. Kids LOVE running back to their cabin to see if anything's been left in their FE. As an adult, I have to admit that I love it, too!!!
If you'd like to join in on the fun on our cruise, please let me know. You can either post your information here in this thread or send me a private message by clicking on my name in the upper left hand corner of this post and then clicking "send a private message to Deb T.". I will only post your DIS name and gender/ages of children on the public forum. However, I will send private messages with names and cabin numbers to all participants to keep everyone up-to-date. Since some people travel earlier in the week prior to cruising, we will close the list on 4-1-11 in order to give everyone time to purchase/prepare gifts and pack them. You'll also need to print the final list of participants and pack it with your gifts so you'll know where to deliver them once you're onboard the ship.
If you have any questions, please don't hesitate to ask. Also, this thread has tons of info and ideas about FE Gift Exchanges: http://www.disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1219607
I speak from personal experience that it really is a LOT of fun to participate!
When we went on a Mediterranean cruise in fall of 09 a bunch of us from Cruise Critic met up==actually the ship had a gathering for us and a special tour of the bridge==anything like that here?
getting excited and am thinking this will be the first of many.
I'm sure we'll set up a Meet & Greet.
I've found that having one around 3pm on embarkation day is good - before everyone gets busy with all their cruise fun. Unfortunately, DCL stopped doing bridge tours after 9/11. There won't be anything special for the Meet & Greet, just the opportunity to meet the people we've been "chatting" with on this thread over the last few months.
You would only be giving up their OBC ($50-$100US) if you booked it yourself. With the big time difference, I would imagine it's difficult to stay in contact with DU.
