Appropriate clothing for 10th grade boy?

[pacrosby]

What was that about turning up noses again??

Control yourself there buddy I was actually unaware that having a "preferance" was the same as "turning one's nose up" at the alternative. I did say 'whatever floats your boat' And unlike alot of people around here I didn't just say that to appear that I wasn't turning my nose up at the alternative. I said it because I'm NOT turning my nose up at someone else's decision to make a choice that may be different than my own.

fwiw If I was turning my nose up at t's and shorts I would've said "I think all kids should be wearing polos and collared shirts when they go to school so they don't look like they are going out to the field". And my kids wouldn't ever wear t's to school. But I didn't. And I specifically said they do.

Now do I get to roll around all over the floor at the thought of your, well.....nevermind

 

[pacrosby]

please refer to the above

I think you and your friend above misinterpreted what I meant when I said those who turn up their noses at polos are no better. I'm talking more about the the attitude that sometimes accompanies the choice; the 'who do you think you are trying to impress with your polos and collared shirts?" People who take that attitude are no better than those who take the "you are such a slob" attitude with bias against t's and athletic shorts. I didn't say anything about not wanting my kids to look like slobs. I just said I "prefer" that my kids not look like they are going to the field. They don't go to church like that either. Or out to dinner. Or to a family gathering. My kids. My choice.

And you'll notice that I didn't quote anyone in particular so it was just a general statement. Whether or not any paticular Disser had demonstrated that attitude was beside the point (I didn't read all the responses). I wasn't calling anyone out.

 

[SpecialK]

We have been together for many years, and I value his opinions very much. I guess after this long its a bit misleading to refer to him as just a "boyfriend." He's been in my kids lives a very long time and is a parental figure to them, just like their stepmother is on their dads side. I also welcome her opinions when it comes to making decisions about the kids that we are mutually raising. Ultimately, I end up being the one that calls the shots in the end though- while I adore my kids stepmom, their father is a completely different story.

The subject was brought up when I was sorting through my sons clothes, and getting rid of stuff that was looking faded or worn out. His point of view was as an adult he will need to dress neatly and nicely and we should encourage him to head in that direction by having him switch from tees to polo shirts. I do admit I think he's a bit out of touch with what the other kids wear, and he tends to dress conservatively. I dont get much opportunity to check out the other kids at his school, so I was looking for some input from other parents.

I value my boyfriends opinion very much and I welcome his input, just like I welcome input from my kids stepmom. I guess I am just very lucky to be surrounded by level-headed and mature adults who all want the best for our kids. While my boyfriend might not make any final decisions about our kids, I would worry about our relationship if I did not feel comfortable listening to his opinions and considering his input.

You're right; I wrongly assumed "boyfriend" had a shorter term connotation. I can understand his input in the context you describe.

That said, I still believe your son should decide how he wants to dress. Neither of my sons likes to wear polos because the collar bothers them. If we have an event that requires dress clothes, they dress appropriately and are no strangers to a shirt and tie.

I'm not worried about starting them on the path to business wear at this stage of the game. They see how their father dresses for work and will learn from his example. So for now, t-shirts are worn daily.

 

[spacemountainmom]

I would just like to add that the op's son (and all of our kids) will work for a much longer portion of their lives than the 18-22 years that they get to be a kid. Let them be a kid as long as they can.

You see far more kids dressed comfortably than dressed like Alex P. Keaton. It should be up to the kid how he dresses, as long as it's not vulgar, dirty and fits.

 

[marcyinPA]

I have a senior this year- he lives in American Eagle jeans (skinny or slim straight) or khaki shorts, Chucks (Converse), and t-shirts (mostly sports teams, but some AE and some from church, camp, school, etc.) In the winter, he throws a hoodie over the t-shirt. Once in a blue moon, he will wear a button front shirt with his jeans, untucked, with a t-shirt under. And even more seldom will he wear a polo shirt (he thinks they look dumb with jeans )

He used to wear a lot of Hollister, Abercrombie, and Aero, but as of last year, he refused to wear anything that had the brand name plastered across the chest. He will still wear AE, as long as it is the whole name isn't on the shirt anywhere. He said most HS guys don't wear those brands anymore- that mostly middle school kids wear them.

After reading a few posts about hating skinny jeans, I had to edit to add that my DS wears them, but he is SO SKINNY that they look normal on him! LOL He is like 6' tall and about 140 lbs. He is all legs (34" inseam) and even the skinny jeans fall off of him. He would never, however, be caught dead in COLORED skinny jeans. They must be dark blue, no exceptions!

 

[marcyinPA]

(Many around here are wearing long black socks with shorts and tees now, anyone else have that trend around them?)

Yeah- it's a trend here too. Nike Mids. Black ones. And they usually wear them with the athletic slides. Or sneakers. I really don't know how to say this without being offensive, so here it goes: the kids around here call that style "ghetto".

 

[shoney]

Yeah- it's a trend here too. Nike Mids. Black ones. And they usually wear them with the athletic slides. Or sneakers. I really don't know how to say this without being offensive, so here it goes: the kids around here call that style "ghetto".

LOL...my ds12 had to have nike slides. He came downstair with them on with socks! YIKES...I said "what's with the socks and sandals?" He said " MOM, they are MANdals and you are supposed to wear socks with them!"



We didn't think it was "ghetto" but more like an old Italian man from Brooklyn! Again, no offense at all please!

 

[meggiebeth]

I think teeshirts and jeans are absolutely appropriate. So are shorts. IMHO I think teeshirts, polo shirts and shirts are all fine, but vests would be pushing it a little.

As long as there are no rude language or signs, or suggestive images on these shirts, I think he's dressing well.

What I don't think is appropriate is boys wearing jeans and shorts halfway down their waists. Ew. Every so often, you see them hauling up their jeans just before they drop to their ankles

Here, school uniform is usually compulsory and supposedly business wear. However it tends to look scruffy and encourages kids to dress worse when wearing home clothes. I like the way many American schools have home clothes worn and think it encourages kids to dress smartly in their own time. School uniform here is uncomfortable, tacky and itchy. I think tee shirts and shorts are much better for a learning environment, and let kids grow up in their own time

 

[tar heel]

Shorts and Ts until it's cold, then jeans and Ts was the uniform at our high school. Funny sayings went by the wayside in favor of bands, colleges, sports teams and plain as they got older.

My son left for college two weeks ago. I told him to take a pair of khakis, a polo and nice shoes. He did not!

 

[lelei]

Honestly, it would be a lot easier if he did have a real preference. I'm just relieved that he shows no interest in skinny jeans, colored jeans or baggy clothes

Thanks for all the comments about what your kids wear, it's nice to know he's most likely dressing the same as his peers. He's high functioning autistic, and doesn't tend to pay attention to others appearances. When I asked him what the other kids wear he told me "clothes, most of the time." the most of the time part alarmed me, and other further questioning he told me that during gym they wear uniforms, not "clothes."

 

[Gumbo4x4]

LOL...my ds12 had to have nike slides. He came downstair with them on with socks! YIKES...I said "what's with the socks and sandals?" He said " MOM, they are MANdals and you are supposed to wear socks with them!"

They're actually designed to be worn from the lockers to the shower & back (and not out in public). The appropriate accessories for that is bare feet & a towel wrapped around your waist

 

[SaraJayne]

We have been together for many years, and I value his opinions very much. I guess after this long its a bit misleading to refer to him as just a "boyfriend." He's been in my kids lives a very long time and is a parental figure to them, just like their stepmother is on their dads side. I also welcome her opinions when it comes to making decisions about the kids that we are mutually raising. Ultimately, I end up being the one that calls the shots in the end though- while I adore my kids stepmom, their father is a completely different story.

The subject was brought up when I was sorting through my sons clothes, and getting rid of stuff that was looking faded or worn out. His point of view was as an adult he will need to dress neatly and nicely and we should encourage him to head in that direction by having him switch from tees to polo shirts. I do admit I think he's a bit out of touch with what the other kids wear, and he tends to dress conservatively. I dont get much opportunity to check out the other kids at his school, so I was looking for some input from other parents.

I value my boyfriends opinion very much and I welcome his input, just like I welcome input from my kids stepmom. I guess I am just very lucky to be surrounded by level-headed and mature adults who all want the best for our kids. While my boyfriend might not make any final decisions about our kids, I would worry about our relationship if I did not feel comfortable listening to his opinions and considering his input.

Your boyfriend is correct, he will have the majority of his life to wear business clothes, which is why I let him wear whatever he wants now to be comfortable for school.

 

[ronandannette]

After reading a few posts about hating skinny jeans, I had to edit to add that my DS wears them, but he is SO SKINNY that they look normal on him! LOL He is like 6' tall and about 140 lbs. He is all legs (34" inseam) and even the skinny jeans fall off of him. He would never, however, be caught dead in COLORED skinny jeans. They must be dark blue, no exceptions!

Yes, mine is 90 lbs. and built like a stove- pipe. You seriously would not believe how popular these colored pants are here. Now, I'm not much of a shopper and spend next to no time in the mall. I was absolutely unaware of this trend. When DS said he wanted to buy yellow pants I basically smiled and patted him on the head thinking he'd never find such an outlandish thing...

 

[marcyinPA]

LOL...my ds12 had to have nike slides. He came downstair with them on with socks! YIKES...I said "what's with the socks and sandals?" He said " MOM, they are MANdals and you are supposed to wear socks with them!"



We didn't think it was "ghetto" but more like an old Italian man from Brooklyn! Again, no offense at all please!

Ok- the Nike slides with no-show socks are FINE....according to my kids! In fact, my two wear those all the time. It's the mid-calf Nike socks (they call them "mids" around here) with either high-top sneakers or slides that they call ghetto.

 

[RunningGirl]

Ok- the Nike slides with no-show socks are FINE....according to my kids! In fact, my two wear those all the time. It's the mid-calf Nike socks (they call them "mids" around here) with either high-top sneakers or slides that they call ghetto.

Here it's the athletes that wear black mid calfs with sneakers. Ghetto does not include shorts, but is the baggy, saggy jeans. No show socks are just the girls.

Funny how different areas are different!

 

[Mkrop]

Ok- the Nike slides with no-show socks are FINE....according to my kids! In fact, my two wear those all the time. It's the mid-calf Nike socks (they call them "mids" around here) with either high-top sneakers or slides that they call ghetto.

Here it's the athletes that wear black mid calfs with sneakers. Ghetto does not include shorts, but is the baggy, saggy jeans. No show socks are just the girls.

Funny how different areas are different!

Seems that way here too, that it is the atheletes. DS14 just left for HS football practice in shorts, black mid calf Nike socks, and slides.

I have never heard it referred to as "ghetto" and I asked DS and he said "huh" but he can be clueless at times too.

 

[jrmasm]

Seems that way here too, that it is the atheletes. DS14 just left for HS football practice in shorts, black mid calf Nike socks, and slides.

I have never heard it referred to as "ghetto" and I asked DS and he said "huh" but he can be clueless at times too.

Same here. And it's male and female athletes that wear them.

 

[disney4us2002]

Seems that way here too, that it is the atheletes. DS14 just left for HS football practice in shorts, black mid calf Nike socks, and slides.

I have never heard it referred to as "ghetto" and I asked DS and he said "huh" but he can be clueless at times too.

Here too. Definitely the jocks. My son plays college baseball and his entire team wears the nike mids with athletic shorts every where they go. The shorts are under the baseball pants and easy to take off cleats and throw on slides.

Ghetto is still wearing the pants falling off your as*.

 

[Pigeon]

The subject was brought up when I was sorting through my sons clothes, and getting rid of stuff that was looking faded or worn out. His point of view was as an adult he will need to dress neatly and nicely and we should encourage him to head in that direction by having him switch from tees to polo shirts. I do admit I think he's a bit out of touch with what the other kids wear, and he tends to dress conservatively. I dont get much opportunity to check out the other kids at his school, so I was looking for some input from other parents.

The idea that children need to do pointless onerous things because one day they'll be adults always strikes me as ludicrous. He's in high school. He still has years to go before he is in the workforce. It doesn't take years of training to figure out how to wear more formal clothing. Generations of people have figured it out what to wear a few days before they start a new job. It's just not that hard.

And every job has its own appropriate attire, so wearing polo shirts really teaches you nothing. Suppose he's interested in being an investment banker. He should be wearing suits every day to high school? How about a carpenter or a police officer or a truck driver or a Target manager or a surgeon?

 

[cheerful chickadee]

My ds is a junior this year (16) and he wears jeans and tees, we got most of his clothes at Hollister and A&F. His jeans are either just straight or skinny straight jeans which are not tight, they're just fitted on my ds. He wears hollister tees (reg & v-neck), a&f tees and sport team tees. He has a few button down shirts that he wears with the sleeves cuffed. He has some polos too but he hates wearing them He has a bunch of sport team hoodies and solid color hoodies he wears. He wears Nike high tops, he has a pair of mid/low Lebron's and a pair of all white low Adidas. All summer he's pretty much lived in Nike basketball shorts, white tees and his mid calf socks with his Adidas or Nike slides. FWIW in our area no one calls any of this "ghetto", not sure how any of this would be considered that. Most of my ds's friends wear the same things, fitted jeans hanging off their butts, hollister tees.