Anyone else with an Aspie child see things get more difficult as they get older?

[debbi801]

Does it ever taper off and stay the same instead of continuously getting worse?

DS is new to the diagnosis (we just got the "official" diagnosis this month). He is 6. It seems like within the last 3-6 months, sensory issues have really gotten worse for him (especially food and noise issues).

Like today, he really wanted to see Horton Hears a Who. So, I took him to the movies to see it. We had to leave after 30-40 minutes. It was too loud for him. He used to like going to the movies, even though at times he needed to cover his ears.

He's supposed to start sensory therapy in the next couple of weeks (the beginning of April), and I am hoping that will help.

 

[memorykeeper]

Every child with autism is a little different but in the case of my son who is 7, his sensory issues have improved with age. We've done lots of brushing therapy and he is reaping the rewards I guess.

 

[MinnieVanMom]

With ABA things get worse before it gets better. I know it is hard to remember. Good luck.

 

[bookwormde]

Yes it does get better our son had some similar sensitivities at 6 but with different therapies has gotten better and with the social skills curriculum even when there are sensitivities he deals with it better, he is almost 9 now.

By the way we are going to see the movie tomorrow.

bookwormde

 

[ecki]

With meds and therapy my DD has made amazing progress. She was dx'd with PDD-NOS at age 3 and she's 6 now. There was one point where she couldn't even go into WalMart because the fluorescent lights buzzing was too much for her. We did a lot of the brushing/joint compression protocol, I think that really helped. Either that or her system just matured and now she can handle a lot of the sensory stuff that bothered her before (she still hates the seams in her socks, tho!).

 

[Luv Bunnies]

My son is 12 1/2 and has Asperger's. He still gets a little freaked out at loud and sudden noises but it doesn't hamper his activities at all. He's always been a very picky eater and that's not improved much at all. The teenage hormones are starting to come into play so the main thing now is figuring out what is Asperger's behavior and what is typical preteen behavior.

His lack of a "filter" is coming more into play as he gets older. The kids he's around at school are getting older and talking about more varied topics. My son is curious (as all kids are) but he doesn't know when to ask a question in private. We might be in the middle of the supermarket and he'll suddenly say, "Mommy, have you ever heard of (insert topic that shouldn't be discussed in public)?" I'll say, "Ask me again later at home." That's his cue to drop the subject for now.

He is in a special school program just for kids with Asperger's. He has a class each day on Social Thinking and he's learning a lot from that. The teachers said Asperger kids can learn to develop a social filter and they're working on it.

Generally, I'm finding that my son becomes more and more delightful each day (if that's possible!). He is happy and comfortable at his school. He has lots of interests (model trains and Disneyland!). He is naturally curious and loves to read and look things up on the Internet (with parental controls, of course). Asperger's allows him to see the world differently and has opened our eyes to lots of new things too!

 

[Earstou]

Each child is different, but I find that things get easier for us. My ds is in high school now and little things pop up all the time, but are not continuous. We ate out tonight, and he grumbled and complained about our choice of where we ate. That is, until his ribs came, then it was all smiles! When he was younger, there would have been a meltdown, and I would have taken him outside or to the car to cool down. But this was the first time in a long time that we had this issue.
In middle school, social issues became worse, but those have gotten so much better now. Middle school can be hard on any child!
In preschool, he was very disruptive in class, now teachers tell me is is very quiet and calm.
So, for us, things have tapered off.

 

[PatMcDuck]

My nephew has Asbergers and he is now 14. He is doing much better than he was at age 6-7. His behavior is better, and his social skills have improved. He will always be a little different, but that's ok. He is smart, and funny too. (He is in 9th grade, still in a private school)

We can see some of the traits of Asbergers going back to my Dad, and one of my brothers (and they have done very well in life.....)

 

[modomo]

My son is 10 with Asperger's, he was only officially diagnosed last fall. I have seen alot of his behaviors improve, but yet then other issues will arise. Yes, he doesn't struggle with the seams of his socks everymorning, but he still wants to play Star Wars at recess and the other kids don't.

We are still very new with the diagnosis and therapies, but we've working on all of this since he was born.

The younger grades were very difficult for him, but so far 3rd and 4th have been wonderful. His teachers have discovered his amazing potential, and they are enamored (I believe), by his non-ending bits of trivia and interesting facts!
I have seen a change this year mostly because his classmates have really matured not only physically but emotionally. He seems to stand out a little more because he's delayed in that area, and could actually care less!

We are from a very rural area, and most people arn't familiar with autism, nonetheless have they ever heard of Asperger's. So getting services has proved to be some what difficult, but we're working on it!

 

[Starr W.]

I have an 11yr old Aspie, things get better with age. He does well in school, the teachers and staff are very proud of him, as are we. He'w fully mainstreamed into regular class and does all the work.

We are starting the process of the middle school transition, it seems like even some of the "typical" kids flip out about it, so there is a lot of support that I see will be very helpful to my Aspie.

He still has his "issues" and we have found out he will play those to the hilt if it will get him out of something he doesn't want to do. Meltdowns seem to come more often when he is tired, so we do try to make sure he gets enough sleep.

I have found out some of his dislikes, issues, whatever you want to call it are "normal" boy behavior(growing up with just a sister I was clueless). To be honest just chatting with other moms, at some "typical" kids issues are.

 

[SeaSpray]

My DS is going to be 17 later this week and I bet that only people who have a child or know a child with Asperger's would realize that he has it too. He has come such a long way in his 17 years, and a lot of it is due to his own efforts and placing himself in situations that years ago he never would have (activities like jazz band, tennis, chess, debate team - which ALL involve him being in the limelight either by himself, or with a very small group).

This is the same kid who used to "hit the deck and crawl" into an upstairs bedroom when we'd go to a gathering at my parent's house! A gathering filled with relatives who, on a one-to-one basis, he had absolutely no problem with!

Anyyway, my point is, all these years later, he is doing fabulously! And like I said, unless you know what to look for, you'd never know he has Asperger's.

 

[wvdislover]

My DD10. Some things get better, some have gotten more difficult. What's gotten better? Sensory stuff--she is better at dealing with it or filtering it out (not gone, just deals better, especially when she's not overtired or hungry). More difficult? Social issues. The difference in her maturity level and that of her peers has become more obvious as of late, as she's getting older and toward middle school age. We actually took her out of school recently and are homeschooling her now, mostly b/c the kids at school were calling her names and telling on her so she'd get in trouble (telling about things they wouldn't tell on with other kids, like the day she scared a classmate in the hallway. If anyone else had done it, he wouldn't have told the principal, but b/c DD did it, he told on her, b/c he knew she'd get in trouble for it). They were also excluding her--no one would talk to her or be friends with her, even the people who had been her friend previously. No one wanted to be associated with her, I guess b/c they would have been made fun of, too. Survival of the fittest. She's a much happier girl now that she's homeschooling. Her biggest accomplishment--she has fingernails. She's always chewed/picked them off, due to anxiety issues. She's feels more free to have her little "quirks," since no one will know about them if she's doing them at home, where it's ok. We just take it one day at a time. Good luck!

BTW, use earplugs for the movies (something like Mack's earplugs, that you can pick up at Wal-Mart or Target), or other "loud" situations. It makes a world of difference! I just keep a box in my purse, so we'll always have them. She also had a box in her backpack while she was in school.

 

[bookwormde]

WVdislover

It is sad that your school did not supply a safe and supportive environment for your daughter to receive an appropriate education in LRE. You do have to do what is best for your child and if it is home schooling then I applaud your efforts. You did not say if she had an IEP but for those who do, if your school does not have an appropriate bullying policy (such as outlined in the book “perfect targets”) then it is something that should be included in the IEP as a need of the child to get an appropriate education.

bookwormde

 

[wvdislover]

WVdislover

It is sad that your school did not supply a safe and supportive environment for your daughter to receive an appropriate education in LRE. You do have to do what is best for your child and if it is home schooling then I applaud your efforts. You did not say if she had an IEP but for those who do, if your school does not have an appropriate bullying policy (such as outlined in the book “perfect targets”) then it is something that should be included in the IEP as a need of the child to get an appropriate education.

bookwormde

Yes, she did have an IEP. Her teacher knew the kids were saying stuff to her, but couldn't catch them in the act, so she couldn't do much, except remind the kids not to bully, etc. Unfortunately, our school board recently rewrote their policies--they said they can serve autism, but they removed "spectrum disorders," so they have told other people in the county that nothing can be done for Aspergers and that they don't service it. A real shame, as I understand that in other areas of the country, there are special schools for kids with Aspie, and that the public schools provide full-time aides for kids on the spectrum. Unfortunately, my DD was being allowed to fall through the cracks. She was being "left behind" by "no child left behind"--a great idea, but it wasn't thought through completely. Homeschooling is working much better for her. Thanks for the concern.

 

[bookwormde]

WVdislover

Just so you know Apergers for IDEA is autism. They cannot write it out, it is a federal standard. If you want to help call the state DOE and talk with IDEA compliance official and let them know what your local school board did and that it is not meet the federal statute. If they are not help full contact the federal DOE and ask for the IDEA compliance office and let them know what is going on.

bookwormde

 

[wvdislover]

Thanks for the info. I would still prefer to homeschool my DD10, especially b/c of the middle school she's supposed to go to next year--scary They would tear her to pieces. She's also a lot further behind academically than we thought, so she really needs the individual help I can give her without there being a stigma attached to it (found out today that apparently, when she asked someone for help when she was in school, that student called my DD lazy, and the teacher didn't have time to deal with it ). Anyways, since we're homeschooling her, we can take a week off in September and take a land/sea vacation!!! We're still pulling DD6 out of school, but how much can a second grader miss (especially since she's already almost on a third grade reading level and doing advanced work in math)?

Anyway, I may still use this info to help other parents in our area who may have kids on the spectrum but can't homeschool for one reason or another.

 

[aleickwort]

My son is 7 - almost 8 - and things have really improved for us this year. Honestly, ever year has gotten a little better, but I've seen a real developmental shift from him this year from "little kid" to "kinda big kid." The thing is that he goes through phases, and some of them are steps backward. I've just learned that the overall trend is forward, and no bad patch lasts forever.

 

[pcparamedics01]

Does it ever taper off and stay the same instead of continuously getting worse?

DS is new to the diagnosis (we just got the "official" diagnosis this month). He is 6. It seems like within the last 3-6 months, sensory issues have really gotten worse for him (especially food and noise issues).

Like today, he really wanted to see Horton Hears a Who. So, I took him to the movies to see it. We had to leave after 30-40 minutes. It was too loud for him. He used to like going to the movies, even though at times he needed to cover his ears.

He's supposed to start sensory therapy in the next couple of weeks (the beginning of April), and I am hoping that will help.

My son is 10. Every year he gets older it gets better!! Hang in there!

 

[missypie]

School got a lot better for DS in middle school when there was no more recess and he could be in pre-AP and GT classes. I tell you, some of those GT kids may not have an official diagnosis, but they are just as quirky as DS is!

 

[SlightlyGoofy]

I want to say blessings on all of you. Your children are so lucky to have such loving and caring parents who are wise enough to seek knowledge.

I say this because it only became evident that my dh has had Aspergers his whole life in the past year. At 73 it does not make much difference to him but it does to me.

I only wish that they had known way back when he might have benefited from the knowledge and what a difference it would have made in my married life to know this.

Knowledge is power. There is a support group over on Yahoo with much information if anyone is interested.

I find DW to be a great place for my husband because of each section being contained to a certain extent and it is such a familiar place to him from all our repeated visits. Also both CM's and many visitors are used to dealing with differences.

It also gives me a minute or two to myself from time to time and I get to be with real people and not just on line.

Slightly Goofy