I live about 90 minutes away from NO.
I think possibly, to have a good time in NO, you need to approach it the way a first timer needs to approach WDW - with lots of planning and lots and lots of questions to people who know the terrain.
I'm left wondering - did you do a walking tour of the French Quarter? Did you see the 1855 house? St. Louis Cathedral? Do the tour of St. Louis #1? The Presbytre? Did you go to the Aquarium? The Insectarium? The Museum at the US Mint? The WWII museum? Did you ride the riverboat? Why didn't you stop and just sit at Cafe du Monde for a while with beignets and cafe au lait? Did you check the crowd levels before you decided on that particular weekend and realize how many people would be there? Or read up on where the good public restrooms are? (Yes, there are some. You just have to know where they are - they're sort of tucked into the museums and national park stuff.) Did you check the map to find where Bourbon street was so you could make one pass to see the spectacle and then avoid it. (We take first timers through there once for a couple of blocks, and then we're done and do something that's really fun in the Quarter.)
I honestly didn't even recognize any of the restaurants you named - that doesn't mean other people won't, and I could have just missed them, but still, that gave me pause. I and all the other Southeast Louisiana folks would've happily steered you to the best eateries in the city. (These days I am in love with Couchon's for a good sit down meal and Boucherie, which a sandwich shop at the back of Couchon's, for a quick meal.)
I'm really sorry you had a bad time, but NO is a city that does take planning ahead to really enjoy - just like a Disney trip!