Anybody have any "Disaster" Turkey Stories??

Not yet...Lars knocks on wood ...but I'm cooking today:D
If you ever post a thread like this at Christmas about Ham Disasters I can tell yu a story;) :p
 
My dh's cousin tried to cook her turkey at 250* once.... at that rate it would have surely been done by Christmas!! I think it was like 8 pm when they finally got to eat.... and that was only because her Mother got there and turned up the heat!!
 

I pray that i don't have any stories to tell you like that, wish me luck :D
 
Once my mother forgot about the gibblet bag in the butt of the turkey...... Ahhhhhhh I will always remember the smell of Turkey and plastic.......... the memories.........
 
I did the same thing as Laurabearz mom did! When we were first married, and I knew zippo about cooking, I didn't take the little giblet bag out of the turkey cavity either!:eek: We all just laugh about it now, many years later!!
 
Oh yea, I got one, my 2nd Tgiving Dinner, my Granny was out of town and she usually goes the duties! I had everything done,
Everything looked good and taste tested good I was excited, I deboned the turkey all 20 pounds of it and put it in a pyrex dish on the stove (not on). And heard something pop, (Company is now coming up the long driveway) I picked up the pyrex dish thinking the bottom had cracked, not so, set it back down, and IT EXPLODED, turkey and glass EVERYWHERE!!! as the company comes in through the kitchen door!!! Of course the dressing and other fixings were on the stove also. LUckily I did have a smaller pyrex dish with some turkey in it. We were able to salvage dinner, but not without jokes still. ANd almost 2 years later we were still finding pyrex glass in the kitchen.

Holiday Warning: Don't put pyrex dish on the stove whether, on or not, apparently the oven being on before that is enough to eplode pyrex.
:rolleyes:
 
I have a great, great, GREAT story-I was 12 years old


One year it snowed and we could not go to my grandmom's for dinner . The day (we heard the weather reports)before my mom went and got a turkey, and the trimmings, but was MAD AS HELL, that first the weather was going to ruin the holiday and second that she had to cook. My mom did not like to cook. The next morning she was in a 'foul' mood (ha, just saw that--no pun intended). Banging pots around, being all nasty and mean. So my dad and I stayed out of her way. Later that afternoon by Dad innocently wanders into the kitchen and asks my mom something, as she was taking the turkey out of the oven. She snapped back at my Dad and an argument insued. My Dad went upstairs for awhile. Around 4:00 he came down and asked what time dinner was. Well that was it. The s___hit the fan. Another fight started, where as my mom said your can forget about dinner and then it happened





SHE THREW THE TURKEY OUT THE BACK DOOR!!!!!!!!!!


Yes right out the back door. I will as long as I live will never ever forget it. My dad and I were in shock. My dad shook his head and went back upstairs. I was later sent out to retrieve the banished bird (she actually had it all wrapped up in foil, so it was fine).

Till this day I will never forget the imagine of a deranged mother flinging that bird out the back door. It makes laugh as that now that I am a mom, I can see how your just sometimes get to that melt down point.

My dad never did have turkey that year either.
 
ROTFLMBO!!:eek: Was your Mom going thru the "change of life" so to speak? My Mom did the same thing to fried Chicken!:eek: Only it was my Brother's that got to witness it.;)
 
One of my sisters called my Mom on Thanksgiving wondering why her turkey wasn't cooking.

She'd put it in the oven frozen, it said keep frozen so she was just following directions :rolleyes: :eek:

I don't think they had turkey that day.
 
I cooked a turkey upside down one year, and I cooked it upside down. We could not figure out why there was no meat on the breasts :rolleyes: First one who lols at me gets it!!! :p
 
My story's second-hand - happened to a coworker several years ago, who for the first time invited quite a large number of people for dinner...and proceeded to cook a huge turkey.

She did not have a china platter large enough to hold the gigantic bird, but did have a huge plastic tray. When she carried it into the dining room, instead of the praise she expected, she was greeted by gales of laughter as the plastic tray cracked in two, the turkey hit the floor and broke apart all over the carpet.

Fortunately, she had lots of other dishes to serve her guests!
 
My first Thanksgiving dinner I cooked the pot holders in with the turkey. I looked all over for my two and only pot holders.....didn't find them til I was taking the bird out of the pan!:o :p
 
It's not a disaster, but we do have a unique annual ritual entitled: MOM WRESTLING THE TURKEY

It starts with me removing the turkey from the outer wrapping, and encountering that %$&@ plastic thingie that they use to tie the drumsticks together.

I don't know what type of plastic this is. I think it's actually steel. I cut here, I cut there, I try to cut here, I can't cut there, and help is summoned. Next DS tries to free the bird from bondage.

All of this is done with the appropriate expletives being provided by yours truly.

I'm happy to say, the bird was set free and is now roasting. :)
 
My story is not about cooking the turkey, but about getting it out of the freezer. So, the turkey is at the bottom of the freezer. I open the freezer and reach in to haul it out (big one too! 23lbs!!)
Now there was a slight difficulty....I am not exactly shall we say tall......in fact I am under 5 feet. So I was standing on my tippie toes trying to reach the turkey....I just about had a hold of it and I kinda fell into the freezer. My hands on the turkey....my feet sticking straight up in the air. I called to my then new FIL to HELP!! All he could do was laugh :rolleyes: After he pulled me out we both had a good laugh, and even though I am now divorced from his son, he still teases me about it when ever he sees me. Thanks goodness he did not have a camera!

*lesson* let the tall people take the turkey out of the bottom of the freezer :p
 
Our funniest turkey story happened after dinner one year. When I was in high school, my family went camping in our motor home over Thanksgiving one year. We didn't have any family that lived within 10 hours of us, so it was a nice way to do something different.

My mom somehow managed to make a traditional Thanksgiving dinner in that tiny motorhome. She used all the burners on the stove and the microwave, and stuff got put in the oven in shifts, but it all got done. (I think we may have had a capon instead of a turkey, but there were only 4 of us altogether.) We enjoyed our dinner and then put away the leftovers. This was back when motorhomes had little fridges, a bit bigger than a dorm size fridge, so the leftovers filled the fridge. We hadn't really packed any other food because she just planned on us eating turkey sandwiches the rest of the weekend.

Well, we took our 2 Siberian Huskies with us that weekend. They had a special doghouse on a trailer that we used to bring them with us sometimes. I guess there was a full moon or something that night because they wouldn't stop howling. These were dogs who normally didn't make a sound, but in the middle of a full campground, we couldn't get them to shut up. My dad resorted to the only rememdy he could think of--he threw our dinner out there so they could eat and be quiet. By morning, there weren't any leftovers at all. Those dogs ate everything, including stuffing, corn, and cranberry sauce.

I think we ended up eating fast food for the rest of the weekend. We were in a tiny town that didn't offer much else, and there was simply nothing else to eat. It was the only time we weren't left eating leftovers until Christmas.
 
When I was a kid my Dad sat the Butterball out to thaw on our freezer in the garage. Unfortunately, the neighbors cat got in our garage by accident. It chewed through the plastic and about an inch down into a spot on the turkey. I had to spend the rest of the evening convincing my Dad not to serve the cat for Thanksgiving.
 














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