Anybody else constantly fighting for Disney?!

[Dreamer8]

And that makes you different from the OP (see the posts that I quoted). For her, it is WDW or nothing.

No that is not what the OP posted. She said DF is free to plan a trip for the 3 of them, but she is still taking DD to Disney. She is entitled to do that as a grown woman.

 

[jodifla]

For the OP:

In my perfect world, we would go to Disney every year for the rest of forever! Shamus (my fiance), is done with Disney. We took Madilynn when she was 2 - the next year, Madi and I went solo. Shamus said how much he regretted not going and would definitely tag along this year. Tonight I told him I read about a great idea to save even more money going to Disney. I tossed out the idea of buying an AP next December (2012) and then going in October of 2013 to get use of the AP. This caused a HUGE debate/argument/debacle that sent Shamus to bed early and me feeling cheated. I went into the bedroom and fought my case - stating the regular DIS messages of how there is no where else in the world that we can go and everything is catered to Madilynn. No where else that we can go and be taken care of with nothing but souvies and extras to worry about once we get there, no need to worry about rental cars, meals, etc. *No need to explain myself to you guys - you get it!* I told Shamus that if it came down to it I would figure a way to take two vacations a year because Madilynn and I will go to Disney every year until she no longer wants to go - and we can plan a family vacation else where sometime in the year.


Yes, that's what OP said. She IS trying to make her DF happy.

 

[mdsoccermom]

No that is not what the OP posted. She said DF is free to plan a trip for the 3 of them, but she is still taking DD to Disney. She is entitled to do that as a grown woman.

She said that it was Disney every year or no more vacations for at least the next 6 years. What happen if circumstances make it impossible to take more than one trip year? If it isn't Disney, it's nothing? No compromise? Grown ups don't act that way.

 

[mdsoccermom]

For the OP:

In my perfect world, we would go to Disney every year for the rest of forever! Shamus (my fiance), is done with Disney. We took Madilynn when she was 2 - the next year, Madi and I went solo. Shamus said how much he regretted not going and would definitely tag along this year. Tonight I told him I read about a great idea to save even more money going to Disney. I tossed out the idea of buying an AP next December (2012) and then going in October of 2013 to get use of the AP. This caused a HUGE debate/argument/debacle that sent Shamus to bed early and me feeling cheated. I went into the bedroom and fought my case - stating the regular DIS messages of how there is no where else in the world that we can go and everything is catered to Madilynn. No where else that we can go and be taken care of with nothing but souvies and extras to worry about once we get there, no need to worry about rental cars, meals, etc. *No need to explain myself to you guys - you get it!* I told Shamus that if it came down to it I would figure a way to take two vacations a year because Madilynn and I will go to Disney every year until she no longer wants to go - and we can plan a family vacation else where sometime in the year.


Yes, that's what OP said. She IS trying to make her DF happy.

She also said:

In a perfect world - this is the answer. But, in the real world... I think I gotta get him on board with Disney - or give up on family vacations until DD is 8 or so! __________________

 

[crashbb]

No that is not what the OP posted. She said DF is free to plan a trip for the 3 of them, but she is still taking DD to Disney. She is entitled to do that as a grown woman.

I admit that that is what she said in her OP, but she contradicts herself with the post I quoted in which she stated that it was either WDW or no family vacations until her daughter was 8.

 

[eliza61]

For me, life is short. I wouldn't put up with a fiance trying to take anything away I enjoyed. That will only be the tip of the iceberg....it will get worse when they're married.

Now, I WOULD ask where he wanted to go, and make it happen. We normally take 3 to 7 trips a year, two are 1-week vacations and the others are weekends, so there's plenty of opportunity to see and do other things.

I did most of my world travels when I was younger. Very fun, but A LOT of WORK. I like WDW now because we have DVC and it's a whole family vacation. We take our time, cook great meals, invite our friends over. We spend about 6 nights at Disney then 3-5 nights elsewhere in the state.

and so you would throw ultimatiums to get your way? Sorry I wouldn't put up with a fiance with the "my way or the highway" attitude and saying life is short is moot. no one knows how short or long life will be.

Why get married if you want every thing your way or you can't give some thing up. What happens if you can't take 3 to 7 trips a year?

And I'd be really scared if my love one starting putting a place ahead of my feelings. That is in essence what she's doing, she's saying that "I love disney so much that no matter how you feel about it I don't give a rats patooie because it's my happy place"

Nope, not really the sort of quality I looked for in a spouse. wouldn't want my kids to marry some one like that either.

 

[jodifla]

and so you would throw ultimatiums to get your way? Sorry I wouldn't put up with a fiance with the "my way or the highway" attitude and saying life is short is moot. no one knows how short or long life will be.

Why get married if you want every thing your way or you can't give some thing up. What happens if you can't take 3 to 7 trips a year?

And I'd be really scared if my love one starting putting a place ahead of my feelings. That is in essence what she's doing, she's saying that "I love disney so much that no matter how you feel about it I don't give a rats patooie because it's my happy place"

Nope, not really the sort of quality I looked for in a spouse. wouldn't want my kids to marry some one like that either.

In my book, he's the one saying my way or the highway.

For me, I did all that vetting before I got married. I wanted somebody I could share my passions with, and whose passions I could learn to appreciate.

I know women know who'd love to do this thing or that thing, but their husband won't "let" them. I wouldn't live that way, so I was careful to pick someone who didn't feel that way.

It's just the right quality for a long marriage, in fact.

 

[Dreamer8]

She said that it was Disney every year or no more vacations for at least the next 6 years. What happen if circumstances make it impossible to take more than one trip year? If it isn't Disney, it's nothing? No compromise? Grown ups don't act that way.

So there are 3 people, majority decides in a year when 2 trips aren't feasible.

OP = Yes
DD = Yes
DF = No

DF loses out.

 

[eliza61]

In my book, he's the one saying my way or the highway.

For me, I did all that vetting before I got married. I wanted somebody I could share my passions with, and whose passions I could learn to appreciate.

I know women know who'd love to do this thing or that thing, but their husband won't "let" them. I wouldn't live that way, so I was careful to pick someone who didn't feel that way.

It's just the right quality for a long marriage, in fact.

Ahh but correct me if I'm wrong. the op had been going to disney. In fact they had just returned from a trip when she hopped on him to plan another one. In fact she went in 2006, 2009, and last year. so obviously he is "letting" her go. She's mad that she actually can't get her way all the time.

So once again why get married if it's "all you, all the time"?

 

[mdsoccermom]

So there are 3 people, majority decides in a year when 2 trips aren't feasible.

OP = Yes
DD = Yes
DF = No

DF loses out.

Their daughter is 3. 3 years old. I'm all for kids giving input to a vacation destination, but since when does a 3 year old decide the family vacation?

 

[jodifla]

Ahh but correct me if I'm wrong. the op had been going to disney. In fact they had just returned from a trip when she hopped on him to plan another one. In fact she went in 2006, 2009, and last year. so obviously he is "letting" her go. She's mad that she actually can't get her way all the time.

So once again why get married if it's "all you, all the time"?

Doesn't seem like much to me...he let her go twice or three times!

Why get married if someone doesn't want you to enjoy your own life? I certainly didn't get married to give up what I enjoy doing. If that had been the case, I would have never married.

 

[Colleen27]

I'd be very surprised if anyone was going to Tavern on the Green. It closed in 2009.

And actually, Parisians (and other people from other countries) tend to be much more well travelled than Americans. A trip to the U.S. with a toddler would not be an issue for many.

Well, I haven't been to NYC without kids since the late 90s so it was just the name of a more "adult" restaurant that came to mind. When we went with the kids we stuck to the "Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives" caliber of restaurant and while there are some great holes-in-the-wall it just isn't the same experience as fine dining.

I know Europeans tend to be more well traveled, in no small part I'm sure because they get so much more time off work to travel. So I suppose that was a poor comparison because that Parisian likely wouldn't look at a trip to the US as once-in-a-lifetime the way a trip to Paris is for most Americans.

LOL. really? In 2009 almost 11 million europeans visited NYC. Wow and none of them brought their children. who knew.

Come on Colleen, with 48.7 million visitors to my home town and an estimate 9.7 million of them international do you really think they left their kids at home?
I can vouch personally they did not. They dont live in the states and they bring their kids and have a beautiful time and they don't walk around town complaining that they are bored. really, they do manage to have wonderful vacations with lots to do.

I'm sure there were plenty of kids in the pack, but we aren't really talking about kids in general but rather very young kids. The OP threw out 8yo, I'd put it at half that - we're sticking to Disney and similar destinations until our youngest is 4 or 5 and can handle more rather than make the compromises/sacrifices involved in seeing once-in-a-lifetime destinations with the limitations of a toddler/preschooler. And of course not everyone is going to see those trips as once in a lifetime or chafe at taking them at toddler pace. That's purely a question of personal travel priorities and style.

In my book, he's the one saying my way or the highway.

I agree. She said she'll find a way to make two trips a year happen. He's saying no Disney, no way. That doesn't sound to me like she's the one who is unwilling to compromise. Now it sounds like her response to his "My way or no way" was to come back with the exact same attitude, which isn't going to help matters any, but to me her initial post sounded like she proposed a compromise that was soundly rejected.

 

[Dreamer8]

Well, I haven't been to NYC without kids since the late 90s so it was just the name of a more "adult" restaurant that came to mind. When we went with the kids we stuck to the "Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives" caliber of restaurant and while there are some great holes-in-the-wall it just isn't the same experience as fine dining.

I know Europeans tend to be more well traveled, in no small part I'm sure because they get so much more time off work to travel. So I suppose that was a poor comparison because that Parisian likely wouldn't look at a trip to the US as once-in-a-lifetime the way a trip to Paris is for most Americans.



I'm sure there were plenty of kids in the pack, but we aren't really talking about kids in general but rather very young kids. The OP threw out 8yo, I'd put it at half that - we're sticking to Disney and similar destinations until our youngest is 4 or 5 and can handle more rather than make the compromises/sacrifices involved in seeing once-in-a-lifetime destinations with the limitations of a toddler/preschooler. And of course not everyone is going to see those trips as once in a lifetime or chafe at taking them at toddler pace. That's purely a question of personal travel priorities and style.



I agree. She said she'll find a way to make two trips a year happen. He's saying no Disney, no way. That doesn't sound to me like she's the one who is unwilling to compromise. Now it sounds like her response to his "My way or no way" was to come back with the exact same attitude, which isn't going to help matters any, but to me her initial post sounded like she proposed a compromise that was soundly rejected.

Colleen, you're a very smart woman. I agree with pretty much everything you have posted in this thread.