Am I weird?

[Metsfan520]

ok I'll try to answer in a polite way.

People (even married people) experience physical attraction - that is a fact of life. It is not weird to have a physical reaction to somebody.

However you (as a married woman) have a professional relationship with this ... I'll be generous and call him a young man although I really want to say boy.

Young Man

He is your child's instructor. It is a business relationship and he deserves to be treated as such ... a business relationship. Making up pet cutsey sexually charged names for him and actually using them oversteps the boundaries of that relationship.

What you are doing is not all that different than an older man getting his jollies peering down the blouse of a teen waitress and and calling her his little sweet thing. It comes dangerously close to crossing the line toward sexual harassment. He is at his JOB and he should not be put into the position of having to defend himself from what is very likely unwanted familiarity.

And that does not even begin to address why your husband is giving you a look over it ... even though he is just fine with his adulteress wife panting after other men in his presence. right.

 

[Boxley]

Yeah, sorry this is not going to fly.

First off the fact that you said you liked him for a few years and that he is now 18 is a bit..off to me. Even the fact that you mentioned he is legal now is really creepy. If it were a guy posting this about a female instructor, this thread would hit the fan.

Second, I remember reading your original post and trying to remember where your name is familair and now I remember why. All I have to say is WHY would you say something so insensitive, in fact stupid in front of your husband like that, especially considering the fact that you have a history of infidelity and by the way, was only a few months ago. I think for right now you should keep some things with tact, and calling someone "precious boy" is not that. Obviously by the fact that your husband gave you a "look" shows that it was NOT cool.

I can undertand having a physical attraction with someone else outside of marriage, Heck I think a lot of married couples have little crushes on others but then again some of those couples do not have infidelity issues that are still fresh. When you post on a internet thread about not only the fact that you have a weird crush like this but also other matters in your marriage, people are going to take this into consideration.

 

[Skywalker]

My DH is fine with the fact I have a little crush on Patrick. He's got a crush on one of the female instructors.

And how old is she?

And oh sorry, I forgot to answer your original question: Yes, you are weird.

 

[Mouse House Mama]

Weird? No. Gross? yes.

 

[allison443]

I have no problem coming back and posting on this thread. All I asked was if it was weird. I never asked you people for advice on my marriage. This guy has been my son's instructor for 3.5 years. I never said I thought he was hot the whole time. He's always been a sweet and respectful guy the entire time I've known him. He's grown up alot. He's a very handsome guy. And he's legal. My DH is fine with the fact I have a little crush on Patrick. He's got a crush on one of the female instructors. It's not like I'm planning on running off to Mexico with him.

"he's legal" What is that supposed to mean? Legal to do what?



Anyway, I think you have your answer from the dis, for whatever it's worth. Most of the posters think you or the situation, or both, are weird (your word).

 

[NeverlandClub23]

Yes I think it's weird. It's ok to think someone's cute (I mean we're all human after all) but I would just stop at that. Why do you know so much about this guy? Like you think he has "something for one of the mom's"? Are you having conversations with him more than just "Hey, good to see you. See you next week"?

I think it's disrespectful to verbalize this crush to your DH (and him to you), even if it's in a joking way. How about making your DH your crush? And telling him how handsome you find him? And that he's your "precious boy"? Instead of telling a board full of strangers how handsome and "legal" you find an 18 year old kid and asking if it's weird to call him your "precious boy".

I agree that you may be making the boy feel uncomfortable and not even realize it.

 

[bubie2.5]

Am I weird?

 

[BeachGirlFLA]

He's still (basically) a kid and you're married...oh, wait...you don't know the meaning of the word "married."

 

[wdwfan16]

He's still (basically) a kid and you're married...oh, wait...you don't know the meaning of the word "married."

Did she not keep her marriage vows?

OP it is weird and even weirder if you have acted on your desires before.

 

[Mouse House Mama]

Oh yeah, if I heard a grown married woman (or any "adult") refer to my son as their "precious boy" I would vomit and then tell you to keep you eyes to yourself and let you know exactly what I thought of your intentions. If I was another parent at the Karate studio I would keep my kids away from you.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

Did she not keep her marriage vows?

OP it is weird and even weirder if you have acted on your desires before.

admitted history of infidelity posted on page 1 from one of the DIS supersleuths.

The fact that she has a history (that is actually fairly recent) and she is actively crushing, isn't "normal". It is reckless.

 

[DisneyBrideToni]

I think the OP knows that it is weird or else she would not be asking if "it's weird". Also, the "he's legal" comment kicked this up to a whole new level of weird.

 

[james'mommy]

Oh yeah, if I heard a grown married woman (or any "adult") refer to my son as their "precious boy" I would vomit and then tell you to keep you eyes to yourself and let you know exactly what I thought of your intentions. If I was another parent at the Karate studio I would keep my kids away from you.

Then maybe you should cut the cord with your child. The guy is 18 or 19 years. Mommy doesn't have a say in who may find him attractive or what intentions that person may have, by the way I have no intentions. I have small crush on the guy. I'm not planning on hitting on him or engaging him in wild sex. As for other people keeping their children away from me there is no need. I can't stand children and I only interact with the master and the instructors. I spend 2 to 3 days a week watch and talking to these people while I watch my son's class. These people are like family to me. It's a very closed knit community and we don't treat it as a business relationship.

 

[NEVERENOUGHWDW]

Then maybe you should cut the cord with your child. The guy is 18 or 19 years. Mommy doesn't have a say in who may find him attractive or what intentions that person may have, by the way I have no intentions. I have small crush on the guy. I'm not planning on hitting on him or engaging him in wild sex. As for other people keeping their children away from me there is no need. I can't stand children and I only interact with the master and the instructors. I spend 2 to 3 days a week watch and talking to these people while I watch my son's class. These people are like family to me. It's a very closed knit community and we don't treat it as a business relationship.

You are married! You have posted about having an affair!
You stated you have been attracted to this 18 year old for a few years, hence him being a minor, hence it being irrational thinking.

"You can't stand kids", yet you have one?
You are on a road to self destruction & taking your family with you.

 

[DaParkers]

Then maybe you should cut the cord with your child. The guy is 18 or 19 years. Mommy doesn't have a say in who may find him attractive or what intentions that person may have, by the way I have no intentions. I have small crush on the guy. I'm not planning on hitting on him or engaging him in wild sex. As for other people keeping their children away from me there is no need. I can't stand children and I only interact with the master and the instructors. I spend 2 to 3 days a week watch and talking to these people while I watch my son's class. These people are like family to me. It's a very closed knit community and we don't treat it as a business relationship.

I hope that you get help. You are very misguided.

 

[MizTink]

Then maybe you should cut the cord with your child. The guy is 18 or 19 years. Mommy doesn't have a say in who may find him attractive or what intentions that person may have, by the way I have no intentions. I have small crush on the guy. I'm not planning on hitting on him or engaging him in wild sex. As for other people keeping their children away from me there is no need. I can't stand children and I only interact with the master and the instructors. I spend 2 to 3 days a week watch and talking to these people while I watch my son's class. These people are like family to me. It's a very closed knit community and we don't treat it as a business relationship.

 

[Luv2Scrap]

This just keeps getting more and more bizarre!

 

[Boxley]

This just keeps getting more and more bizarre!

Kind of like a bad soap opera,huh?

 

[Luv2Scrap]

Kind of like a bad soap opera,huh?

Yeah, a bad one for sure! And I like soap operas!

 

[PADISFAM]

Then maybe you should cut the cord with your child. The guy is 18 or 19 years. Mommy doesn't have a say in who may find him attractive or what intentions that person may have, by the way I have no intentions. I have small crush on the guy. I'm not planning on hitting on him or engaging him in wild sex. As for other people keeping their children away from me there is no need. I can't stand children and I only interact with the master and the instructors. I spend 2 to 3 days a week watch and talking to these people while I watch my son's class. These people are like family to me. It's a very closed knit community and we don't treat it as a business relationship.

no wild sex it's all good then