Am I in the wrong? (long)

[austin&pipermom]

First here is the back story. I am the oldest of 4 girls. My sister that is the closet in age, was supposed to get married 2 days after Katrina hit. (My family lives on the coast in Mississippi) As you could have guessed the wedding was postponed. Well this past April she told us that she was going to get married June 4th. So she is giving me and my mom to plan a whole new wedding in 2 months. She did not plan any part of the wedding the first time around, which was her choice. Well since the hurricane me and my husband was relocated to Jacksonville, FL. So I could not just get in the car to go help her plan this. Well my sisters and I already had purchased dresses, and mine was 200 dollars, mine was different since I was the matron of honor. Well in planning the new wedding she deceided that my sisters needed different dresses, she wanted them a tea length. My dress was already that lenth. Well she told them to get measured. She did not once call and tell me that I was getting a new dress or that I needed to get measured.
Fast forward to the wedding weekend. Well I have a 3 year old son and a 3 month old daugher with me. Well we go to the rehearsal and the priest asked who the maid/ matron of honor was. Well I step up and than my sister says (without even looking at me) oh she is on her way her name is ....Well I am floored. Than after the rehearsal she told me and my other sisters that we need to follow her to go get our dresses fit. I was like what!!!!!! We go, I do not say anything. The lady took like 5 seconds with my measuring and said she will drop the dresses off tomorrow morning before we leave. Next morning we get the dresses, mine does not fit , it won't even zip. I go tell my sister and she starts yelling at me like it is my fault. In the End I wore my first dress and I still had to pay for the second one.
Now we are planning a vow renewal. We did not have a cermoney the first time around. Well she was like " I am so exicted I get to be your Matron of Honor", than I said no we are not planning on having any since it is a renewal. Now she is mad and not even returning my calls. Sorry this is so long.

 

[Missy Mouse]

First here is the back story. I am the oldest of 4 girls. My sister that is the closet in age, was supposed to get married 2 days after Katrina hit. (My family lives on the coast in Mississippi) As you could have guessed the wedding was postponed. Well this past April she told us that she was going to get married June 4th. So she is giving me and my mom to plan a whole new wedding in 2 months. She did not plan any part of the wedding the first time around, which was her choice. Well since the hurricane me and my husband was relocated to Jacksonville, FL. So I could not just get in the car to go help her plan this. Well my sisters and I already had purchased dresses, and mine was 200 dollars, mine was different since I was the matron of honor. Well in planning the new wedding she deceided that my sisters needed different dresses, she wanted them a tea length. My dress was already that lenth. Well she told them to get measured. She did not once call and tell me that I was getting a new dress or that I needed to get measured.
Fast forward to the wedding weekend. Well I have a 3 year old son and a 3 month old daugher with me. Well we go to the rehearsal and the priest asked who the maid/ matron of honor was. Well I step up and than my sister says (without even looking at me) oh she is on her way her name is ....Well I am floored. Than after the rehearsal she told me and my other sisters that we need to follow her to go get our dresses fit. I was like what!!!!!! We go, I do not say anything. The lady took like 5 seconds with my measuring and said she will drop the dresses off tomorrow morning before we leave. Next morning we get the dresses, mine does not fit , it won't even zip. I go tell my sister and she starts yelling at me like it is my fault. In the End I wore my first dress and I still had to pay for the second one.
Now we are planning a vow renewal. We did not have a cermoney the first time around. Well she was like " I am so exicted I get to be your Matron of Honor", than I said no we are not planning on having any since it is a renewal. Now she is mad and not even returning my calls. Sorry this is so long.

I wish I could give you advice but I don't really understand what's wrong by your posting. It was kind of jumbled together. She chose someone else as the maid of honor?

 

[Laurafoster]

If she chose someone else to be her maid of honor then she has no right to assume that she should be your maid of honor! If you had been hers then i would have maybe understood a little, but since its a vow renewal and your not having anyone its not like you've chosen someone else!

If she wont return your calls have you tries talking with your other sisters?

 

[Tinkerbellz]

I feel for you austin&pippermom. It sounds like your family was scattered after Katrina as many were. It sounds as if your sister did not consider anyone other than herself after the first wedding was postponed. I think it was incredibly wrong of her not to discuss the MOH thing with you. After all, you are her sister. I'm sure with the relocation you didn't have "throw away" income to purchase 2 dresses.

And then to just assume that she will be the MOH at your VR...WOW. I hope that things work out for you. Feel free to pm me if you need someone to vent to.

 

[PrincessShanShan]

We're from the gulf coast area too. My dh is from St. Bernard Parish. His family lost everything in Katrina and lived with him for quite awhile afterwards. Several are still scattered about. We got married on Dec. 22, but because of everything with Katrina, we still haven't had our honeymoon (we're Disneymooning in Dec.!). I know from experience how Katrina has caused a great deal of emotional trauma. I'm not excusing what your sister did and I'm sure others would quickly say people need to just get over everything with Katrina, but I really think the aftermath will last for years for some and maybe forever with others. Maybe your sister is thinking your vow renewal is what her wedding was supposed to be. I'm sure she had a lovely wedding, but nothing was as she had originally planned and it could be possible that she feels jealous of you right now. Your not having to change your plans. I'm definetly not saying what she is doing is right, but it just could be a little hard for her to see your plans come off with out a hitch when hers was turned upside down. Maybe she'll come around, but if she doesn't, don't blame yourself. You've done nothing wrong.

Shan

 

[jojoandhb]

Weddings just bring out all kinds of weirdness in people. My best friend was supposed to be my MOH. We've been talking about it for like 5 years. Now that I am ready to actually plan and go into details and stuff, she is not helpful, won't give me any feedback, isn't excited, and only cares about getting her boyfriend to propose. My sister is my only sister. I thought she'd at least come to the wedding since she lives 45 minutes from Disney. Every time I talk about the wedding, she either changes the subject or tells me I should do something different. She also expects me to pay for a hotel and tickets to the park for her and her kids. People get really emotional and jealous and act really strange. I am not sure why that is. Don't take what your sister did personally. I was once asked to be in a wedding, and then the bride never said anything about dresses. I got an invite in the mail and figured out at that point that she had decided not to include me as a BM after all. I went to a different wedding that day, which was closer to my house (my car wasn't in great shape to say the least) and for someone my fiance did business with. When I didn't come to her wedding, she got mad at me. I explained the situation and she said she was never talking to me again (and she hasn't). Just take it with a grain of salt, and really talk to you rsister. She may have been going through all kinds of emotions because of Katrina, and she may have had some issues with you moving away. Sometimes when people are hurt, they do things they wouldn't normally do.