Advice? (School/Children-related)

[::Snow_White::]

So we have penpals from the elementry school for this school club.
I got this really nice girl she loves hanging out with me when we visit.
Well today I learned that she was moving in 2 weeks. She really wanted to see me more so she wrote down her adress and phone number.
Now I was afraid of this because I didn't know what her mom would say and since I'm in highschool I have a lot of things I have to do and can't hang out with her all the time.
Well I gave her my number so she could call every once in awhile because I know I wouldn't call as often as she'd like or I'd forget. I was afraid her mom would be mad but she didn't and about 20 minutes after I got home she called me.

She wants me to come over and play with her. First she asked for me to come over tonight and then tomorrow. Both times I told her I was busy and maybe some other time.
I don't know her parents and neither does my mom and she doesn't think hanging out at her house would be a good idea because I don't know what her family is like.
I wouldn't feel comfortable visiting her but I don't want to hurt her feelings, or what to tell her.
I've thought about having her find a day, perhaps Friday, at a certain time when she could call me and talk to me for about 10 minutes about her week.
Like I said I have many things to take care of and I don't want her being sad that I didn't answer the phone because I was busy and being interrupted while I was doing something important. I also don't feel comfortable with her calling me up whenever she pleases just for the fact I've only visited with her four times and it just feels strange to me for some reason.

I've thought about telling her that we should just go back to being penpals and instead of through the school that I could continue to talk with her in letters, especially because she's moving instead of on the phone. I'm just kinda split.

Any thoughts? Advice? Thanks!

 

[HouseMD1120]

What grade is she in?

 

[::Snow_White::]

2nd.

If she was in 4th/5th grade it wouldn't be so hard, but in 2nd grade she doesn't understand why I don't want to come over.

She was dissapointed when I had to go home today and wanted to ride home with her on the bus afterschool.
Plus she told her teacher that "today was the best day because my penpal is here" and it makes me feel horrible to tell her, but I'm not sure how to explain it.

 

[XxCuriosityxX<3]

edit

 

[Kphelps16]

i think that both of your ideas are really good and could work.
Having a set time she could call you would work out well for you both. You would know when it was coming, and she would have the security of knowing you will always pick up then. I'm not like..a child psychology major or anything like that, but my family fosters children and security is just what they really crave, knowing it'll be the same.
It could also work for you to continue writing letters, a somewhat lost art form in these times, so that she can still feel like she's talking to you as often as she wants.

I really hope this helps, and that you can find a solution that works for you.

 

[STOPxmickeytime]

I've been through this before.
I was a PEER leader in 8th grade, and I had a 4th grade girl as my PEER kid.
I met with her every Thursday after school when we had PEER meetings, and one day she asked me to go to the movies with her and her mom.

I felt so bad saying no, so I went with her.
But after that I told her that the group PEER leader said he thought it was best if we kept it to a strictly in school relationship (he actually DID say that.) And she was fine with it.

So maybe fib a little and say that the school thinks you should only write letters?
Or you can just say it's more fun to write letters or something.
Good luck!

 

[::Snow_White::]

Thanks for the response everyone!

I've been talking to my friend and she thinks it's the best idea too.
I don't mind writing letters to her home, it's just kind of awkward on the phone because I don't really know her that well.
I have a crazy schedule as it is and I don't think it'd be a good idea.

Thanks for the RL experience Mickey, sounds like the same thing to me.
Next time she calls I'll have her set up a day where we can talk for awhile every week and go back to writing letters when she moves.

 

[Shelton123]

I've been through this before.
I was a PEER leader in 8th grade, and I had a 4th grade girl as my PEER kid.
I met with her every Thursday after school when we had PEER meetings, and one day she asked me to go to the movies with her and her mom.

I felt so bad saying no, so I went with her.
But after that I told her that the group PEER leader said he thought it was best if we kept it to a strictly in school relationship (he actually DID say that.) And she was fine with it.

So maybe fib a little and say that the school thinks you should only write letters?
Or you can just say it's more fun to write letters or something.
Good luck!

I assume you highlight peer because a peer is supposed to be someone your age

 

[pigletgirl]

Have you talked to her mom? I bet for this little girl it would mean the world to her if you spent 1 hour with her. It only has to be one.

There is no hurt in trying!

 

[::Snow_White::]

No, I haven't talked to her mom. She (the little girl) was going to have her talk to me, but she was busy.

I was thinking about maybe having her come and we could play at the park for awhile before she left.