advice please

[poohtown]

several years ago, I got my daughter an expensive guitar since she was interested in lessons. Well that didn't work out too well, but I decided to keep the guitar in case she wanted to try again when she was older (or my other daughter might want it). A couple weeks ago, my best friend mentioned she always wanted to take guitar lessons and I replied dd had a guitar she wasn't using. I let her borrow the guitar with the understanding that it would go back to my daughter if she wanted to start lessons this school year (this year she gets free lessons and had mentioned maybe she would try again before my friend took it). I also asked her to please make sure it was put away when she wasn't using it so her kids didn't think it was a toy. You see where this is going? Her youngest son broke it. She felt bad and said she'd replace it, but I feel guilty also since it is older and was not being used at the time. Now dd is interested in lessons, but a different instrument. So here's my questions:

1. should I let her replace the guitar for what it would cost me to replace it? My other daughter has shown interest in it.

2. should I split it with her since it was older, although it was mint condition?

3. should I ask her to use the money it would cost to replace it to buy dd the other instrument (which is cheaper)?

4. should I chalk the whole thing up to 'don't lend friends expensive things' and let it slide?

5. does anyone have another suggestion on how they would handle it?

like I said I feel bad because it wasn't being used in our house, but I'm also upset that she let the kids use it after I asked her not to.

 

[EsmeraldaX]

If she offers to pay for it, and you know that it won't be a real blow to her financially, then I'd say ask her to instead pitch in towards the new instrument.

If she is a good friend, and you know she is having a hard time money-wise, I'd tell her she can make it up to you at a later time and just let it go.

 

[Pugdog007]

#3

 

[onecoolmama]

If your other child is interested enough to use the instrament, then just have her replace it. I mean, if you are going to have to buy a new one for her, you might as well just let her buy you one.

If not, what I would tell her is that it is older and look up what they are going fo ron ebay. Just tell her to repay you that amount and get your daughter the new instrament she is interested in.

 

[WillyJ]

Tough call. . . but I think if i were you I'd just be honest about the situation and tell her while she's only obligated to replace the guitar, it'd be better for you if she gave you the cash value instead. . .

Then leave it up to her. . . all she owes you is the replacement of the guitar, and if you insisted on cash and gave the impression you were going to buy another one and she found out you bought a different instrament instead it might cause hard feelings. . better to be straight up.

Good luck!

 

[orvilleair]

Cash value. I agree with WillyJ. Take the money and buy another guitar for your other daughter. Who knows, maybe there is a better guitar (as in size, comfort and sound) for your daughter.

Kind of off topic, but your dd has shown interest in another instrument. Any consideration into renting an instrument during lessons? It's popular with 5th and 6th graders starting band.

 

[zaxmom]

My DH is a guitar lover and has bought parts and rebuilt guitars. You might want to get the broken guitar from her and see if there is any trade in value. A good friend would then see that it was still of value to you and offer to throw at least a little cash toward your new instrument. If not, chalk it up to live and learn.
Many stores buy and sell used equipment, so don't throw it away. It may not be as bad as you think.